Long Live Us

*Alex's pov*

Alex stood still, staring into the mirror. His hands were sweaty and shaking, and he was deep breathing to try and calm himself down.
"Everything's fine Alex, everything's going to be fine." He said to himself, clenching his fists in an attempt to get them to stop shaking. He was determined to not have a panic attack on his first day, and was putting all his effort into calming himself down. He wandered shakily to the bathroom and took a drink of water, feeling grateful for the soothing feeling the cold liquid gave against his hot flaming body. After downing the cup, he looked up into the mirror, glad to see he had stopped sweating and didn't feel as shaky. However, his hair was all in clumps where he had been sweating, and so after dunking his head under the shower, he went back to his room to fix his hair. As he ran his straighteners through his hair, his thoughts were dancing with worries and predictions of the day ahead. He thought back to Jack, whether the boy would remember him and still be willing to make friends with the new boy. What if he didn't? What would Alex do then? He wasn't very good at making friends because he was so shy around new people. He hoped he could show off his real personality by feeding off of Jack's confidence as well as the confidence we would gain from already knowing the dark haired boy and his muscular friend.

Alex pulled up into a free space in the road across from the school, shutting and locking the door of his mum's old, battered red Fiat she handed down too him. He did love the car, but it was hardly a Mercedes or Ferrari. But it was way better than getting the bus. Alex wandered away from the car, and crossed the road, making his way down the long drive way too the school. Alex didn't really know what people did in the morning before registration, and didn't really want too wander into the common room just too stand by himself. He checked the time on his phone: only three minutes until the bell.
'That's fine,' Alex decided, making his way into the science block and too his form room. He leant on the wall outside the door and flicked through various things on his phone. The bell went suddenly, making Alex jump, and he glanced around embarrassed, checking nobody was there too see it. Next thing he heard was a set of loud footsteps - someone obviously running - and then a tall figure burst through the door to the building. Alex laughed quietly when he realised it was Jack - red in the face and his hair flopping all over the place. Jack gave Alex a quizzical look, trying to catch his breath, before panting "Are you taking the piss? That was only first bell?" And shaking his head angrily when Alex nodded in reply.
"Fuck that man, what a waste of energy!" The dark haired boy, running his hands through his fringe and still catching his breath.
"Where did you run from?" Alex asked, still sniggering to himself at the appearance of the boy. Although his hair was everywhere, and his eyes were glistening slightly with anger and his cheeks were a bright red - Alex still couldn't deny how attractive this boy was.
"Only the bus stop but I feel like I've just run the Marathon or something!"
Their conversation was ended by Mr Wilkinson coming through the doors, carrying a stack of books and a mug of coffee.
"Unlock the door Jack." He mumbled, nodding his head to the keys on top of the books. Jack stood up and took the keys, opening the doors and leading the teacher and Alex into the room.
"Now the second bell goes." Jack grumbled, as the bell sounded again and the rest of the class began to pour through the door. Alex greeted Hayley and Lucy as they sat down, because Jack had his head on the table - evidently still recovering from his run. Rian came in a few moments later, and at seeing Jacks head on the desk a smile erupted across his face. Alex looked at the boy, confused, but he only winked and mouthed "watch". Rian walked round behind Jack, paused for a moment, before violently flinging his arms around the boys waist and yelling into his ear "MORNING GORGEOUS!" making the dark haired boy jump out of his chair and turn to glare at the person, then realising it was Rian, shaking his head and punching him in the arm.
"I fucking hate you, dick face!" Jack said, whilst Alex and Rian both burst out laughing. Jack looked to both of them, before pointing at Alex and saying "don't you encourage him! You're meant to be on my side!" Alex got worried for a moment, thinking he had genuinely offended him, but the glisten in his eyes told him otherwise, so rolled his eyes and replied "sorry sire!" in a sarcastic tone. Rian took his place between them, still laughing to himself and completely ignoring the glares that were coming from Jack.

Once sir had taken the register, the class got up and began to make their way to first period. "Guys we're in the same music class and that's what we've got until fourth." Jack told them, smiling broadly at his two companions. "We've got Miss Jackson as well, winninggggg." Rian rolled his eyes, and asked who else was in the class. Alex had no idea what or who they were talking about, so just followed them trying to absorb as much information as possible. The three boys made their way to the music block, and Jack barged straight into the classroom - despite the rest of the class waiting outside. Alex frowned, confused by Jack's forwardness and eagerness. However, the rest of the class followed moments after. The room was big, with keyboards lining the walls and a stack of chairs by the door. There was music stands by the back wall, and guitars lined up by the cupboards. The walls were covered in various music artists, musical notes, lyrics and pretty much anything music related. Looking over to the front, Alex spotted Jack sitting with a young women, whom Alex assumed to be Miss Jackson. She had long, bright blonde hair that was tipped with a dark blue at the ends. She had at least 3 piercings in each ear that Alex could see, and he also noticed a tattoo of a semi clef on her wrist. She had bright blue eyes and a warm smile, yet Alex could feel some raw emotion in the pit of his stomach as he watched Jack and the teacher murmur quietly too each other. He couldn't work out what it was though, and then Jack was being shooed away and the class had grabbed chairs and were assembled in rows in the middle of the room.
"Right guys, as most of you know I'm Miss Jackson. What the year is gonna consist of is learning loads of different musical skills and then putting them into making a song with your partner, which will be presented and graded as part of your final exam along with the theory exam. Today I want us all to decide pairings and then having a few fun things to get us into the swing of music for this year." She smiled, clasping her hands together and looking around. "I need to see Taylor and Alex please, but everyone else get into pairs." The class immediately erupted, and as Alex made a way to the front he noticed a blonde girl run over to Jack and fling her arms around his neck. He grabbed her waist and spun her around whilst she squealed in delight. Alex felt his heart sink, realising that what he'd been feeling was jealousy.
'Damn it, I'm falling for Jack' he scolded himself. He watched as this girl kissed Jack's cheek and wrapped their fingers together. This was the moment Alex knew would always come. This was Jacks girlfriend. It was obvious, what he had secretly hoped all along hadn't happened - Jack definitely wasn't gay. Sighing, Alex turned back to the teacher to see what she needed. Next too Alex stood a short, dark brown haired girl, with an adorable button nose and bright brown eyes. She was wearing a white blouse with a patterned collar and a black blazer littered with band badges, with a skater skirt and a pair of vans. Her bag slung over her shoulder was also covered in various band and music related stickers and stamps, and a few bracelets hung around her small wrists. This must be Taylor, Alex guessed.
"Right guys, you're both kinda new so I figured I'd pair you up so I hope that's okay, you look like you'd get on, so go for it." She smiled at them, before spinning round on her chair back to the computer. Taylor turned to Alex, a huge smile across her face and said "hey, I'm Taylor but call me Tay because Taylor sounds like a boy and I hate it." She said, causing Alex too laugh.
"I'm Alex." He replied, returning the broad smile. He already felt he would get on with this girl - she seemed sweet, and very genuine, with a funny and laid back side to her.
"I started at the end of last year, that's what she means by "kinda new", incase you were wondering." She told Alex. The pair walked over to their computer and key board, and sat down. Alex stole a glance towards where Jack was sitting on the other side of the classroom. His arm was draped over the shoulders of the blonde girl, who had her head in the crook of his neck. Alex felt his stomach twist, and he shook his head at how stupid he was being. He hardly knew Jack, he wasn't even sure they counted as friends, so why was he so...jealous? Turning back to Tay, Alex noticed the girl was looking at him with the facial expression people have when they're trying to work something out. Alex frowned at her, silently questioning her what she was thinking about.
"You fancy either Jenna or Jack, can't figure which one though." She told Alex, who was still confused. Was it that obvious? "It's Jack." She concluded after a moment, folding her arms and looking quite proud of herself.
"How..W-what..says who?" Alex stammered, trying to hide his fear - and failing. Tay laughed to herself whilst Alex turned a bright red colour.
"One, you just confirmed it, two, all cute boys I get on with are gay, always happens." She said shrugging.
"Who says we get on, then?" Alex replied smartly, pulling a face of disgust at Tay and looking her up and down. She laughed again, gently punching him in the arm.
"You jerk!" The pair spent the rest of the lesson getting too know each other, joking and laughing, and getting a little bit of work done. Alex's sexuality wasn't brought up again, which he was thankful for, and he began to relax around this girl.

The bell went for lunch break, and Alex waited for Jack whilst Tay tapped her number onto his phone and stood to wait for 'Jenna'. The tall boy and blonde girl came over and both said hey.
"Oh Alex, this is Jenna. Jenna, Alex." Jack said, motioning to each one as he said their names. Despite the crawling feeling in his stomach, he smiled at the girl and said hi. They stood talking for a minute, and Jenna seemed like a really, really nice girl. Actually, she was great. Both her and Tay were, but the fact that the blonde girl was faultless made Alex envy her even more. She could fling her arms around Jack the way he wished he could. Alex felt this wasn't fair, but told himself over and over that he'd only know the boy a few days and these two could've known each other forever - and could be dating, that still was neither confirmed nor denied. Jenna then walked off with Tay, leaving Jack with Alex. Their was silence between them for a few moments, as both seemed to be in deep thought, yet the silence was broken when Alex blurted out "is she your girlfriend?" He instantly regretted it, because it didn't come out in the cool and casual way that he had hoped it would. Jack laughed in response, shaking his head.
"Nope, just friends. You still have a lot to learn don't you?" He said, winking and ruffling Alex's hair with his hands. The shorter boy thought he would actually melt if he stood looking at Jack any longer. He was so perfect. Alex wished he had the confidence to spend more time with him - even just as friends. "Come on it's time for you to meet the rest of the gang." Alex swallowed. Gang? How many was there? What if they didn't like him? Did Jack even like him? Where was Rian? A million thoughts began to rush through his head, and Alex began to feel his hands shake. He heard Jack call his name, sounding worried, and then felt his cool hands holding his face. Alex looked up at the raven haired boy, who's dark eyes were round with worry and concern as he held Alex's face.
"Alex? Can you hear me? I think you're having a panic attack...you don't have too meet them..i thought you'd want too...seeing as we're friends..they'll like you I know they will...oh shit have I fucked up?" Jack murmured, half to himself, and Alex let out a giggle at the boys worry. "Don't laugh at me! Are you okay?" Alex nodded, calming down at lot. Jack removed his hands from Alex's face, and sighed. "Holy shit you scared me. Please don't ever do that to me again." He whispered, gazing down at Alex, his eyes still filled with worry. Alex smiled up at the boy, warmed by the fact he did seem to care, and Alex knew he was allowed to care about him back.
"I'm sorry," He managed to reply, "let's go meet your friends." He finished, giving Jack a reassuring smile - even though he was certain Jack was meant to be reassuring him. Nodding, Jack walked out the door and the boys began to chat about music. Alex discovered that they were both into the same kind of music - which just made Jack even more perfect in his eyes. They wandered into the hall, brought food, and then made their way to the common room. As Jack leant into the door to open it, they were stopped by a short girl, with curly ginger hair tied up in a bun. She had freckles dotted over her face, and had pretty blue eyes, and Alex thought she looked like a nice enough girl.
"Hey Jack!" She said, smiling up at him.
"Hi." He replied bluntly, trying to get through the door and past the girl. However, he was unsuccessful.
"Who's your friend?" The girl asked, looking at Alex. Alex spotted Jack roll his eyes and could feel agitation radiating from his body. He really really didn't like this girl it seemed. "Hey, I'm Alex." He responded so Jack didn't have to, moving his way through the door to stand next to Jack.
"Nice to meet you, I'm Ellie! Jack are you getting the bus?" Jack grunted in reply, receiving a "yay!" From Ellie before she turned out of the door. Alex shot a questioning look at Jack, who was leaning his head on the wall with his eyes closed. After a few moments he spoke, answering the questions Alex had.
"That's Ellie, me and her used to be really good friends..well I guess we still are, kinda. She's that friend that you don't like really. She's so fucking annoying, and everyone thinks she has this massive crush on me, which makes everything ten times worse." Alex went to say to Jack that he thought she seemed okay, but be intersected, "yeah I thought she was okay too! It's when you're around her ages. Dunno just one of those things." He shrugged, standing up properly and leading Alex round the corner into the common room. The room was bustling with activity, and was quite loud, and people conversed and sang and shouted and threw stuff. It was the usual havoc you'd expect too walk into if there was a room filled with 16 to 18 year olds. Jack looked back at Alex, smiling at him, before leading him to a table where three boys were sitting.
"Wahay there he is!" One of the boys said as Jack and Alex sat down.
"Woo yaaay!" Jack said sarcastically, rolling his eyes. "Guys this is Alex, y'know I told you about him? Alex, this is Max, Josh and Dan." Jack said, pointing to each boy and then smiling to all of them. Max had light brown hair, partially flicked and partially jelled up, and had dark brown eyes. He had thin eyebrows, and a bit of stubble forming around his lips. Josh seemed to be smiling constantly, and looked like an easy going, chilled out and happy person. His hair was longer, slightly lighter, and he wore it flicked up, his eyes a shade of greeny-brown. Dan had darker brown hair, jelled right back, with lighter eyes than the other two and a mysterious look about him. They all seemed friendly enough, and the five of them slid into easy conversation.

When lunch ended, Alex had maths - and so did Jack, Rian, Max, Tay, Jenna and Cassadee, who seemed to be Rian's lady friend. Alex was glad they were all in the same class, and it made the settling in a lot easier. The bell went at 3:05 signalling home time, and everybody made their way to the gates and home. Glad to be home, Alex flopped down on the sofa. His mum and dad were both working late tonight, so he would have some time to himself after his busy day. He checked his phone, seeing a text from Vic and one from Tay. He replied to Vic - saying he was free Wednesday afternoon and to Tay, laughing at how her text had said "testing testing one two three" like she had promised. Alex lounged about, watching tv and texting, checking his twitter and Facebook, before doing some homework. His parents arrived home a few hours after he did, both within ten minutes of each other. They sat down for dinner - sausages and mash potato - and talked about Alex's day.
"So you're settling okay honey?" His mum asked, and Alex nodded.
"Yeah. I met Jack and Rian's friends today who all seem like really nice guys." His dad frowned, and worry dashed across his mum's face.
"Were you...okay?" She mumbled, looking nervously at her husband. Sighing, Alex looked down. He hated his anxiety. He hated the panic attacks. He hated that everyone - even himself - felt he couldn't cope with everyday situations. And what was worse, was sometimes he couldn't - which he had shown Jack today. He cursed himself for freaking out in front of the boy, Alex had really hoped to get through the first few weeks looking the normal guy but that apparently wasn't allowed to happen.
"Erm, well, no..kinda. I was with Jack and he managed to calm me down before it got really bad..." Alex answered. His parents both nodded, sharing a look which Alex knew the meaning of.
"I think you should see the doctor after this first week, because it's a big step and we don't want to push you too far." There it was. Another trip to the doctor. He had already been twice in the few months they'd been here. Alex hated going, but it put his parents' mind at rest, so he agreed. Another trip to the doctor.

Notes

yayyyy :3