Chapter 16

Alex’s POV

“Have you just thought about disappearing? Without a trace of where you went?” Jack asked.

We were laying on the ground at the park on our backs, looking at the sky. It was nearly dark out. We’d been there all day.

Truth is, yeah. All the time I thought about dropping off the face of the earth. No one would remember me if I stayed away long enough. Not even Jack. In junior year, I actually did consider just running away. I thought about packing up everything I had and just leaving. Going somewhere no one would find me. Stay there for the rest of my life, maybe end up killing myself. I wouldn’t be lonely, I had myself. I’d been alone for most of my life anyway. Not physically, I had plenty of friends, I just didn’t necessarily like any of them. Other than Cassadee.

“Um... Yeah, a lot.” I replied. “How come?” I began to worry he was thinking about leaving everything, including me, and dropping off the earth.

He just shook his head. “Just thinking.”

“Jack, why are you thinking about that? Seriously, why?”

“I’m just thinking about how people do that. Pack up everything, just leave. Leave everything behind and live their life in loneliness. It seems boring, but peaceful.”

“I’ve thought about it before. Getting all my things together and going to the most hidden corner on earth and staying there alone for the rest of my life.” I shrugged. “At the time, I felt like I didn’t have anyone in the first place and that loneliness wouldn’t be that much different.”

Jack didn’t reply. He just continued to look at the sky. He looked like he was thinking hard. “What are you thinking about?” I asked.

“Everything.”

“What’s everything?”

“Just a lot of things. My mom, you, myself, my life, all sorts of things.”

“Why me?”

“I don’t know. You’re just on my mind.”

“Good or bad?” I wondered, hoping it wasn’t anything bad.

“Hopefully good. I can’t really wrap my brain around what I’m trying to think or say.”

This time I didn’t say anything. It had gotten pretty dark out, the moon and stars were showing in the dark sky. I turned my head to look at Jack. He looked confused, but I figured I’d let him be. The moonlight dimly lit up his perfect features and I didn’t want to look away. His arms rested on his stomach and he closed his eye, eyelashes fanning over his cheekbones. I scooted over and kissed his cheek. He smiled and turned on his side so he was facing me, draping his arm across my torso and clutching the fabric of my shirt.

“I love you, Lexi.” He murmured.

“Love you too baby.” I replied, kissing his hair.

“Can we just run away together?” He asked.

I smiled to myself. Running away with Jack did seem fun, but we didn’t have nearly enough money. “As much as I’d like that, I can’t drop out of high school. And we don’t have enough money to stay healthy. Or alive.”

“I guess.”

“Were you serious about it?”

“Semiserious.”

“Maybe in a while.”

He just hummed in reply.

~~~
We woke up in the park in the morning, just in time for school. I had clothes in my car, Jack can borrow some. We walked back to my car and got dressed, eating a granola bar I had in the glove box.

Jack and I drove to school in my car, not going separately. We just sort of talked about stupid little things, gossiped about people at school, celebrities. He seemed a little bit distant though.

“Jack? You okay?” I asked.

“Hm? Um, yeah, I’m fine.” He said, his eyes not focused on anything. Like he was zoning out but still heard everything I said.

We reached the school and I didn’t unlock the car. “Jack, tell me what’s wrong.” I demanded.

“Nothing is wrong, Alex.”

I could tell by his tone there was something wrong. “I’m not unlocking this car until you tell me.”

“Alex! There isn’t anything wrong!”

“I know when there’s something going on with you, Jack. I need to know.”

“There isn’t anything wrong.” He said, unlocking the car with the button on the door. Fuck, I had forgotten about that. I got out and caught up with him.

“Jack, there’s something you’re not telling me. I can see it. What is it?”

“Oh my god, it’s nothing! There isn’t anything to tell you! Lay off!” He exclaimed, letting out a breath of exasperation.

I recoiled at his harsh tone and stopped walking, then turned around and walked away. I wasn’t going to deal with him today. “Alex, wait.” He called.

I didn’t stop or reply. I just kept going, seeing Cass and Caleb, holding hands and talking about something. I walked up and gave Cass a hug, saying hi to Caleb.

“Hey babe, everything okay? You’re usually with Jack in the morning.” Cass said, frowning in confusion.

“He’s not telling me something and got all bitchy when I asked him to tell me, so I decided I wasn’t going to deal with it.” I said, slightly pissed off.

“Aw, sorry babe. What would he not be telling you?”

“I have no idea because he won’t even give me a hint. Yesterday he was talking about wanting to run away, but I don’t think he was being serious. Like a hypothetical topic.”

“What if he’s planning to propose?” Caleb asked.

I laughed. “I don’t think so. We haven’t even been dating for two months.”

“Promise ring?”

“Probably not.”

“I don’t know then.” He shrugged.

I sighed. “Me either. But I’m not going to stop bugging him until he tells me. I’m his boyfriend, he has to tell me everything.”

The bell rang and Cass kissed Caleb goodbye before we walked to Jack’s room. He wasn’t there yet. We went in anyways and sat down, other kids joining us. After the tardy bell rang, he came in, tossing his papers on the desk and not caring where they landed.

“You seem unhappy.” Rian pointed out.

“No shit.” Jack said, running his fingers through his hair.

“Why?”

“It’s just one of those days.” I could see he was lying. I narrowed my eyes and began to take the notes he was writing down.

He didn’t seem to be any different than this morning. Not really paying attention to anything anyone else was doing, let alone what he was doing. He dropped his glass of water with a loud “Fuck!” and had to clean up all the glass and water, successfully cutting himself in the process.

“Alex, why don’t you help your boyfriend?” Jasey sneered.

“I don’t think he needs my help.” I said coldly, letting her know the conversation was over.

Jack didn’t react to my words or Jasey’s. He just put a band-aid on the rather deep cut on the palm of his hand. It was deeper than I thought, the blood seeped right through the band-aid. I did get worried about that.

He bit his lip and replaced the band-aid, bleeding through that one too. I stood up and took his opposite hand, leading him out to my car without a word and driving him to the hospital.

I explained the situation, but didn’t talk to Jack. I was pissed at him. The nurse gave him seven stitches and wrapped his hand up, then sent us back with some pain medication.

I didn’t say anything to Jack on the way back to school either. I just grabbed a pass and didn’t even bother to let him sign it, just filled out all the other spaces and left for my next class. I gave my teacher the pass and sat next to Cass.

“Where did you go?” She whispered.

“Hospital.”

“Is Jack okay?”

“Seven stitches and pain medication. Nothing awful.” I know I wasn’t using much emotion, but I was just angry with him.

“Are-“

“Ms. Pope and Mr. Gaskarth, would you like to share your conversation with us?” The teacher asked. I always told them if they asked, just giving them what they wanted.

“We were talking about how I had to take Mr. Barakat to the hospital to get seven stitches in his hand because he dropped a glass cup and cut his hand.”

She raised an eyebrow and put us together for a group project. Something about US history. Whatever.

We got some of it done, only having two days to work. “Cass, we can’t get this done in two days. Come by my house after school so we can work on it?” I asked.

“Sure babe.”

“I’ll just give you a ride.” The bell rang and we walked to lunch together, sitting at the same table.

“Have you and Jack talked any other than on the way to the hospital?” Cass questioned. I was sitting next to her, my arm around her neck. Caleb had gone home sick.

“We haven’t said a word to each other since he told me to lay off him about the secret this morning.”

“You didn’t even talk on the way to get his stitches?”

“No.”

“How come?”

“Because I’m pissed at him.” I said bluntly.

“But why?”

“Because there’s something he’s not telling me. I’m his boyfriend, I deserve to know everything.”

She shrugged. “Yeah, I guess I’d be mad if I knew Caleb was keeping something from me.”

“Exactly.” I stole one of her goldfish and she pouted. “I’m hungry, you know you love me too much to deprive me of food.”

She laughed. “True. What happened to your lunch?”

“Jack and I spent the night at the park, so I don’t have one.”

“Go buy one.”

“I am NOT buying the school’s food.” I said, laughing.

“I side with you on that one.”

~~~
The end of the day came and I was glad Jack’s car was in the parking lot from yesterday after school so I didn’t have to drive him home.

I didn’t go to his room after school. Cass and I drove right to my house, going up to my room and continuing the project.

“Had Jack tried to text you?” She asked, not looking up from the American flag she was drawing.

I picked up my phone and went to my messages. One from Jack. I opened it.

Thanks for taking me to the hospital.

I rolled my eyes and replied.

Whatever.

Figuring that would get him the message I was mad at him, I turned it off and began to type up a paragraph about how the colonists broke off all ties with Britain. Didn’t we learn this in eighth grade?

Cass put the poster on one end of the room and went to stand at the other, examining it. “What are you doing?” I asked.

“Far-away test. Does my flag look proportional?”

I laughed. “It looks fine, babe. Better than I could have done.”

She smiled like she was satisfied and started gluing down the typed paragraphs we already printed. She wasn’t focusing on me and I knew this was the perfect moment.

I silently got up and crept up behind her, then attacked her sides and made her scream and squeal in laughter. She ran away from me, but I chased her around the room. I didn’t really catch her, but she started after me and I ran until I fell on my back on the bed. She got on top of me and dug her fingers inside my sides. I laughed and squirmed, trying to get her to stop.

She eventually did, but was too tired from laughing to get off me. I didn’t really want to get up either, just because I’m lazy and prefer laying down.

I’m not quite sure how it happened, but next thing I knew Cass’s lips were attached to mine. Her fingers were in my hair and mine on her hips.

Our lips moved together in sync for a really long time before we both pulled back at the same time, realizing what we were doing.

“Oh shit.” I whispered. Her eyes were wide and her hand covered her mouth. I cheated on Jack. She cheated on Caleb. Fuck, we were screwed. “Cass. We can’t tell anyone and we definitely can’t do that again. Okay?”

She nodded and climbed off me. “I can’t believe I just did that.”

“I have no clue who kissed who, but it happened and there isn’t any taking it back. Just don’t tell Caleb and I won’t tell Jack. There is no way in hell we can do that again, alright? Under no circumstances.”

“Okay. Try and act normal around Jack tomorrow so he doesn’t get suspicious.”

“If I end up talking to Jack.”

“Check your phone and see if he texted you.”

I nodded and turned my phone on, seeing a text from Jack.

Where are you?

I sighed. “Should I lie to him? I don’t want him coming over here.” I told her, showing her the text.

“Tell him you’re at home but we’re working on a project and not to bother us.”

I nodded and replied.

Cass and I are at my house, but we’re working on a history project. Don’t bother us.

I sent it and we kept working. “I think we should stop for tonight.” I said after a while.

She nodded. “I should actually get home, my mom will want me home for dinner.”

“Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow.” She stood up and I kissed her cheek. “Later, love ya.”

“Love ya too. I’ll text you.” She smiled and left.

I sighed and fell on my bed. I lay there for a long time before I started to feel sick to my stomach and ran to the bathroom, just in time. Tom heard me, I guess, and came in.

“Woah, you sick or something?” He asked, taking a step back.

“I feel awful.” I choked out before throwing up again. “Get out.” I coughed.

He happily left and I didn’t stop puking. My throat burned and I was coughing like crazy, my stomach hurting and I was shaking.

Tom came back in after a while and forced me to take my temperature. “Dude, you’re really sick.”

“Seriously?” I croaked, emptying my stomach again.

“Your temperature is 104, so yeah.”

“Shit, I hope I didn’t get Cass sick.”

“That’s what you’re worrying about right now?”

I nodded and he left, shaking his head.

I spent the rest of the night in the bathroom, repeatedly throwing up and flushing the toilet. I brushed my teeth about a thousand times and eventually fell asleep in the bathroom, leaning against the wall. I didn’t stay asleep though, I was woken up with my stomach lurching.

Tom came stumbling in, having been woken up. “Will you fucking quit it? I’m exhausted and your puking is keeping me up!”

“Sorry.” I croaked, throwing up again. “Sleep downstairs.”

“Will do.” He grumbled before leaving. He tossed me my phone on the way out.

I finished with that round of puking, then checked my messages. One from Jack, an hour and a half ago.

I’m sure Cass is gone now, come over.

I’m sick.

He replied right away.

Yeah right. Just come over, Lex. I want to talk.

No Jack, I’m really sick. I have a fever of 104 and I’ve spent almost all night throwing up. You don’t want me to come over.

Then I’m coming over there.

Don’t. You’ll either get sick or puked on.

Speaking of which, round forty-billion came about. Once that was done with, I saw he had texted me again.

I don’t care. I’m coming over.

Don’t, Jack. You already got stitches in your hand today, I don’t think you want to spend a week in the bathroom also.

He didn’t reply. Great, he was probably on his way over. I groaned. Ugh, making noise wasn’t a good idea. I threw up once again. I probably looked like shit right now.

Tom came up. “Are you STILL throwing up?”

I nodded as my stomach lurched. “J-Jack’s coming o-over.” I choked out before another round came on.

“Great... Do you want him here?”

I shook my head. “He’ll get sick.”

“Yeah, but you know I won’t be able to stop him from coming in anyway.”

He was right. Jack was determined to see me. I didn’t reply, instead responding with coughing up anything that was left in my stomach. He just left while I flushed the toilet and gasped for air. I guess Jack had arrived because the door opened again and he came in to see me leaning over the toilet and attempting to breathe without throwing up. I’m positive I looked like shit, my hair stuck to my sweaty forehead and my skin washed out. I was exhausted and I took in another gasp of air.

And of course, my stomach lurched.

Jack stepped back as I threw up. “How long has this been going on?” He asked.

I couldn’t answer, I was slightly busy emptying my stomach. Eventually, that round came to an end and I choked out an answer. “Since like, 5:30pm.”

“That sucks.”

I glared at him. “No shit.”

“You need anything?”

“What I NEED is to get better, what I WANT is a glass of water.”

“Not when you snap at me.” He crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow.

I rolled my eyes. “Can you please get me a glass of water?”

He smiled. “Better.” He left and came back with a cup of water. “Don’t break it.”

I laughed weakly at the thought of his hand, which still had a white wrap sort of thing around it. I took a tiny sip of the water, having it burn on the way down. It was difficult to swallow. I coughed, which resulted in throwing up. Again.

“Alex, do you want to go see a doctor? You’ve been puking for like...” He checked his phone. “Six and a half hours?! Holy shit dude, how is there anything left?”

I couldn’t answer, my mouth was a little busy. Once that had passed, I replied. “I have no clue. And no, I’m not going to the doctor. It’s just the flu, no big deal.” I said, my voice raspy and my throat burning. I gasped in air, trying to catch my breath before the next round came. Which wasn’t too long.

“Is the flu going around?”

“If it wasn’t, it is now.” I choked out after I was done.

“Well I’m not leaving you here like this.”

“You have to teach.”

“I can call Tarcy.”

“No. You have a job, you can’t spare that just for your sick boyfriend.”

“Alex, I don’t want you here alone all day.”

“Too damn bad. I’m clearly not going to school, but you have to teach.”

“I don’t HAVE to.” He argued.

I looked at him with an expression that said, “You’re going and this conversation is over.”

He frowned and crossed his arms. “Fine. But I’m coming to check on you during my prep period.”

“Fi-“ My stomach lurched in mid-sentence and I threw up for the millionth time. “Dammit, I am so sick of this!”

“Sorry baby, do you want anything else?”

“Saltines.”

“Can you keep them down?”

“M-Maybe.” I coughed. “I can’t believe you’re still here, watching me throw up. That’s disgusting.”

“Maybe so, but I’d rather you not throw up an organ while I’m gone.”

“Oh, that’s a pleasant thought, thanks for making me paranoid.”

“Anytime, babe.”

I didn’t throw up for a while, but Jack still didn’t let me eat or drink anything but water. He stayed up all night with me, making sure I didn’t get sicker. I didn’t, but at times I had to sprint to the bathroom. I had lost count of how many times I had thrown up a looooong time ago. It was six in the morning and I was still having little episodes of puking.

“Alex, I want you to see a doctor.” Jack said.

“No.” I answered immediately.

“Alex...”

“I said no and I mean no.” I said as firmly as I could, my throat still burning and my stomach hurt. I was so tired, but every time I even shifted I felt sick. I was afraid to take any medication in fear I’d just throw it back up.

“I still want to stay home with you today.”

“No.”

“Alex. I can’t just leave you here.”

“Fine, so you can text me during class. If I don’t reply for a long period of time, it’s because I’m in the bathroom puking up my organs.”

“Well that’s a sexy thought.”

I burst out laughing. Bad idea. My stomach flipped and I sprinted towards the bathroom, emptying my stomach once again. I staggered back out, trying to catch my breath and holding my stomach. “I. Feel. Fucking. Terrible.”

“Sorry for making you laugh.”

“Worth it, that was a good one.” I grinned. I used the wall for support as I stumbled back to the bed, suddenly freezing. I would use Jack as a blanket, but I didn’t want to get him sick, so I got under the covers and pulled them up to my chin.

“You cold baby?” Jack asked.

“Freezing.”

“Aww.” He cooed, reaching out and feeling my forehead. “Damn, you’re really hot.”

“Thanks.” I said cockily. He smirked.

“Aren’t you clever. You’re hot in both ways.”

I just closed my eyes. “You need to get to work, you can take some of my clothes.”

“I don’t want to go to work.”

“Too damn bad. You have to go, now get ready.”

He groaned and got up. I tried to get comfortable under the covers, but every move made me feel gross. I finally just tried to settle where I was.

I felt Jack’s lip against my hair. “I’m texting you as soon as I get to school.” He said, then closed the door behind him as he left.

Sure enough, fifteen minutes later, my phone buzzed. I opened Jack’s text.

I told you I would text you as soon as I got here. How you feeling?

Like shit.

Try to get some sleep, okay baby?

Okay.

I turned my phone off and closed my eyes again, drifting to sleep, but not easily.

~~~
Jack’s POV

I turned my phone off as first period came in. I probably looked like shit, but whatever.

“Hey Jack.” People greeted.

“Hey guys.” They all sat down and noticed Alex wasn’t there.

“Where’s Alex?”

“Sick.”

“Probably with STD’s.” Jasey said.

“Jasey, Alex does not have STD’s. He has the flu.”

“Liar.”

“How many times do I have to tell you, I don’t lie?”

“Why should I believe he had the flu?”

“Because he spent more than twelve hours in the bathroom and he’s at home trying to sleep right now?”

“I didn’t need to know that.”

“Apparently you did, because you didn’t believe me.” I said, glaring at her.

“Is Alex okay?” Cass asked.

“I hope so, he’s just feeling like shit. Which seems reasonable in his condition. Don’t text him today and no one go to his house because he’ll be a bitch.”

“That’s a nice thing to say about your boyfriend.” Rian said sarcastically.

“I’m telling you the truth. He’ll be a bitch.” I shrugged. “So don’t go over. You’ll just bug him.”

“I seriously can’t go see my sick best friend?” Cass asked.

“I wouldn’t unless you want to spend the next twelve hours throwing up.”

“Ew, I’ll stay away.”

“Exactly.” I laughed and told them to start taking notes.

All I could think about was Alex. I hoped he was sleeping and not throwing up again. I was actually kinda worried. I had never seen anyone that sick before. Not to the point where they puke for over twelve hours.

I was in the middle of the lesson when my phone buzzed. I immediately stopped what I was doing and looked at the new text from Alex.

Hey Jay, I feel like shit. I think I need to go to the doctor... I’m throwing up blood now.

My eyes widened. “Oh fuck.” I said. “Um... I need to call Alex, just copy the notes.” I instructed the class. I went outside and dialed his number.

“Hey Jay.” He croaked.

“Alex are you really throwing up blood?” I asked, nervous.

“Y-Yeah.”

“Shit...” I muttered. “Okay, I’m going to call Tom and tell him to take you to the doctor, okay?”

“Okay.” He hung up and I called Tom.

“Hey Jack, what’s up?”

“Alex has to go to the doctor, he’s throwing up blood.”

“Fuck, okay, I’ll take him right away. Thanks for letting me know.”

“Mhm.” I hung up and went back inside, my insides twisting in nerves.

“Is Alex okay?” Cass asked.

“No.”

“Why?”

“He just got a lot worse and now he’s going to the doctor.”

“Damn, he never goes to the doctor. For anything.”

“Exactly.”

I finished teaching the lesson, not really paying attention to what I was doing. My thoughts weren’t on English, they were on Alex.

If he was actually really sick, something more than the flu, how bad would it be?

Notes

You guys are so amazing, and I'm sorry I haven't updated in 5eva! I've been having family troubles and have been distracted. But thank you for the encouraging comments! <3