Terrible Things
Mistakes and knotted ropes.
Alex ran from the room and the class erupted into gossip. Holy shit. I had just kissed Alex. No, Alex kissed me. And Chloe had seen. Holy, fuck. I couldn't ignore the fireworks that had exploded when his lips touched mine but god damn did I try. I was leaving in two days. Forever. I had no time for Alex. I had no time. I stood up and left the room, walking with tears blurring my vision for what seemed like an age. I heard shouting from the bathrooms and leaned against the wall.
"He died Alex! They both died! And your making out with... with... a nobody?"
"Carrie's not a nobody, Chlo. And I know, you've said it a thousand times since we left that class room. I wish you would just let me hug you." Alex sounded desperate.
"The last thing I want is a hug from you. I lost both my parents less than an hour ago. And now." I leaned closer to the door and fell through. Shit. "What the fuck." I scrambled to my feet and stared at Chloe.
"I'm so sorry." She shook her head and pushed me back out the door.
"The last thing I want is your sympathy, bitch."
"CHLOE!"
"Shut up Alex! It's not your place to defend her! Its your place to look after me! Me Alex! I'm your girlfriend!" Choe's voice was getting louder and louder and I backed the final few steps out of the door and leaned against the wall again. "Your fucking orphaned fucking girlfriend!" Chloe final broke down, sobbing. I imagined her leaning into Alex's arms and him kissing her forehead. And still, after everything she had been through, I still wished it was me.
I dragged my feet back to my car and sat in the front seat, not driving, not moving, just crying. What was strange was I found myself crying for Chloe, a girl I didn't and who hated me with all her heart for being kissed by her girlfriend. Oh, who was I shitting? I kissed him back.
My bed wasn't comfortable that night. I couldn't sleep. I unpacked and repacked my few possessions and wrote a new song. I even figured out the chords and harmonies. I made it till 6am before I finally fell asleep and when I did all that rung through my head were vicious nightmares.
"Oh poor Carrie, it's okay, your leaving. Be upset. It's a lot to move states, away from your.. oh wait. He's nothing to you." Chloe stood leaning over me, her fangs dripping blood. "Nothing do you hear me!? Alex is mine. All mine!" She sliced her nails across my cheek and pulled my flesh out from under her fingernails.
Her laugh rang with me as the dream dissolved into another.
Church bells rang and I looked up from my place on the sidewalk to see yet another body hanging from the oak tree beside the large stone building. Suicide had becoming nothing in this town. It happened every day, another person, another brother, another daughter. All jumping. I looked closer at the one nearest to the ground, the one with the longest piece of rope. There was a tag hanging from its limp neck and I read it out loud. "Anger." What? I looked at the two bodies next to it to see they both had tags. "Hope." "Confusion." I stood back to see that the many bodies all had tags, all had emotions. A giant sign appeared next to the tree with bold red letters written in blood.
"CARRIE'S EMOTIONS"
I jumped out of bed and wiped the cold sweat from my forehead. Holy shit. I had been a shell for the last three weeks and now, now my emotions were comitting suicide in my dreams? No. No, no, no. I pulled on a pair of shorts under my oversized baseball shirt and ran to the window. Jack was in the garden with Rian, throwing a football. Jack. Jack made me smile. I needed, shit, I needed my feelings back. I jumped onto the branch of the tree and lowered myself to the ground.
"Barakat!" I yelled at him and stared at me like I was crazy, running between our front yards in my pyjamas. "Jack, make me smile." I stopped in front of him huffing.
"Wait, what?" His look matched Rian's, pure confusion.
"He died Alex! They both died! And your making out with... with... a nobody?"
"Carrie's not a nobody, Chlo. And I know, you've said it a thousand times since we left that class room. I wish you would just let me hug you." Alex sounded desperate.
"The last thing I want is a hug from you. I lost both my parents less than an hour ago. And now." I leaned closer to the door and fell through. Shit. "What the fuck." I scrambled to my feet and stared at Chloe.
"I'm so sorry." She shook her head and pushed me back out the door.
"The last thing I want is your sympathy, bitch."
"CHLOE!"
"Shut up Alex! It's not your place to defend her! Its your place to look after me! Me Alex! I'm your girlfriend!" Choe's voice was getting louder and louder and I backed the final few steps out of the door and leaned against the wall again. "Your fucking orphaned fucking girlfriend!" Chloe final broke down, sobbing. I imagined her leaning into Alex's arms and him kissing her forehead. And still, after everything she had been through, I still wished it was me.
I dragged my feet back to my car and sat in the front seat, not driving, not moving, just crying. What was strange was I found myself crying for Chloe, a girl I didn't and who hated me with all her heart for being kissed by her girlfriend. Oh, who was I shitting? I kissed him back.
My bed wasn't comfortable that night. I couldn't sleep. I unpacked and repacked my few possessions and wrote a new song. I even figured out the chords and harmonies. I made it till 6am before I finally fell asleep and when I did all that rung through my head were vicious nightmares.
"Oh poor Carrie, it's okay, your leaving. Be upset. It's a lot to move states, away from your.. oh wait. He's nothing to you." Chloe stood leaning over me, her fangs dripping blood. "Nothing do you hear me!? Alex is mine. All mine!" She sliced her nails across my cheek and pulled my flesh out from under her fingernails.
Her laugh rang with me as the dream dissolved into another.
Church bells rang and I looked up from my place on the sidewalk to see yet another body hanging from the oak tree beside the large stone building. Suicide had becoming nothing in this town. It happened every day, another person, another brother, another daughter. All jumping. I looked closer at the one nearest to the ground, the one with the longest piece of rope. There was a tag hanging from its limp neck and I read it out loud. "Anger." What? I looked at the two bodies next to it to see they both had tags. "Hope." "Confusion." I stood back to see that the many bodies all had tags, all had emotions. A giant sign appeared next to the tree with bold red letters written in blood.
"CARRIE'S EMOTIONS"
I jumped out of bed and wiped the cold sweat from my forehead. Holy shit. I had been a shell for the last three weeks and now, now my emotions were comitting suicide in my dreams? No. No, no, no. I pulled on a pair of shorts under my oversized baseball shirt and ran to the window. Jack was in the garden with Rian, throwing a football. Jack. Jack made me smile. I needed, shit, I needed my feelings back. I jumped onto the branch of the tree and lowered myself to the ground.
"Barakat!" I yelled at him and stared at me like I was crazy, running between our front yards in my pyjamas. "Jack, make me smile." I stopped in front of him huffing.
"Wait, what?" His look matched Rian's, pure confusion.
Notes
Sorry if this was really triggering and short for anyone but I left a warning in the description! I didn't want Carrie to seem like a bitch for the way she thought about Chloe after her parents died but... I'm counting on her still being emotionally numb since Jaime died.LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!!!! <3 I love you all :) xoxo
This story is so good! OMG. I just found it and started reading it yesterday, and haven't stopped. I just caught up with all of the updates you have of it and really love it.
It's a very dark fan fic. Specifically with the first half, honestly one of the darkest I've read actually... like with that curse of everything happening on Sundays? Man... and you just kind of kept it up too. It was just very dark, and sad, but... different. And I really like that about this.
The second half seems to be deviating from that a little bit, but I sensed that coming back with the babies thing. I mean, not that I want anything to happen, but I almost feel you had something bad happening planned with the pregnancy. Perhaps not, perhaps that was just to raise some of the tone as opposed to keeping it happy go lucky, who knows. But I found it interesting how you did that.
I'm glad that Alex and Carrie finally got together, with the first part of this I was just screaming GET TOGETHER until they finally did. lol. And I was happy. :)
I found it a bit odd how they just took in those fans though. On a realistic writing level, the oddity of this story was the curse thing. But adding the fans thing in too, it just... it didn't really fit. Especially considering legalities and all of that. I feel like it was a little too easy that they gained guardianship.
But overall, I have enjoyed Alex and Carrie's love story. I'm sad to see it was never finished, so I'm leaving this comment to let you know if you ever do choose to finish it, I will be here to read, for sure. I'd love to see how it all ends for these two. Even if it's just a final chapter wrap up or something; I understand what it's like losing inspiration.
But yeah, sorry if this comment sounded harsh at all, but just wanted to leave my honest thoughts. I think you're a truly great writer, though, and hope you have at least kept up with it in your free time. :)
7/12/16