I woke up around 6 am from little sobs from Mari’s room. I stood up, almost toppling over from the tiredness and weakness. I got to Mari and she wanted some food as well as her diapers to be cleaned. I was just about to warm the carrot puree she was supposed to have when I felt two hands carefully wrapping around mine, taking the carrot mash away from me. Before I knew, Jack had sat me down on a chair, quickly warmed the food and started feeding it to Mari.

I was baffled. I smiled at the sight of Jack talking to Mari in cute, baby-appropriate language and trying to feed her the carrots. She was quite stubborn, refusing to eat sometimes, but Jack still managed to get a good amount of the orange paste into her tiny mouth.

I giggled at their cuteness and Jack blushed a tiny bit. It was so weird, we were both acting completely different today.

I hugged him from behind, kissing his head. He turned around and looked me in the eye, the expression on his face serious. I flinched. What did he intend to do?

“Alex… I have made a decision. I want to get better. I want to stop drinking so I can give you and Mari all the love you deserve. But what I would wish for is… that you stop doing these things,” he said, just the tiniest nudge of his head indicating that he meant my cuts at the end of the sentence.

I didn’t know how to feel. Panic overpowered all other feelings after a short time and I started crying. Jack made sure that Mari was safe before coming to console me.

“Shh, baby dandelion. We can make this work. I love you,” he whispered softly. My trembling got a little better, but I was still anxious. I didn’t even really know why, it was probably because the monster inside me that fed off my self-harm was scared.

“Jay… This sounds good… I will try to stop, but I can’t promise everything. I know that I will have my ups and downs and I hope you can understand,” I replied after collecting myself a bit.
He smiled and kissed my nose before turning around and picking up Mari from her baby-chair who had been watching with great interest. He set her on both our laps and hugged me, careful not to squish her though.

“How about a jamming session?” he asked, grinning widely. God, how I had missed this grin!

Notes

Uhh, I know this seems unlogical, I'm sorry. I guess you could say they just had a good day c:
Sorry for being so lazy with updating but I am ill and most of the time I am so weak that even typing is too hard :s

Comment/rate/subscribe if you like it? uwu

-Laura