When I woke up again, Alex was snuggled to my chest. I replayed our conversation in my head.
I still couldn’t believe he really loved me after what I had done. It just seemed illogical, but maybe he had thought a lot about it during my “absence”. I wanted to believe it and his words, the way he had looked at me, told me that he felt for me like I felt for him. There was a special spark in his gorgeous brown eyes.

I felt really bad for how I had made him feel; it was obvious that my behaviour had caused a lot of pain for him. Not only my relapse into drinking but also the suicide attempt.

His face was engraved with more wrinkles than before as well as some beard stubble. He was pale, ghostly white against the darkness in the room. The paleness was only broken by the circles under his eyes, deep and dark. I wanted to protect him, he wasn’t supposed to look this sad.

When I had woken up at the hospital, the first thing I thought was “why am I still alive”, followed by “Alex”. I realized something.

This human being who was currently next to me, his face buried in my chest, was the most important one I had ever known. I needed him under all circumstances and for this, I was ready to sacrifice a lot.

I decided to throw out my drinks when I arrived home. I was so happy and proud that I nodded a little, successfully hurting my tender neck and moaning in pain. Alex stirred a little in his sleep, but I touched his feathery soft hair and calmed him down a little.

I noticed that tears were streaming down my face. How could I have been so selfish? Leaving Alex alone and Mari… My little angel, my adorable baby girl. How could I have left them alone?

“I will never leave you alone again,” I whispered into the dark room. Alex let out a tiny mewling noise in his sleep, as if he wanted to express agreement. I smiled and slowly let myself drift off to sleep again.

Notes

Yeah I know this chapter is kinda shit but idk gah sorry.
Could be because I'm working on a new story! I'll tell you as soon as it's out! c:

-Laura