Thanks to you
No one wants to be that girl
My eyes opened and I had the realization I was in my bunk. I wiggled a little and felt two arms around my waist. I yanked myself out of them and in doing so I slammed my head against the top of my bunk. I tried to get my hand to catch me but I missed and fell out of the bunk. "Ow!" I yelled. I sat up a little and wrapped my hands around my head. I heard foot steps and I could feel their eyes on me.
The pain my body was going through right now was excruciating. For some reason I felt like crying. I felt someones hand on my shoulder. I jumped a little. "Paige, It's ok." I heard Jack say. I moved my hands from my head and opened my eyes. "My body hurts... It just hurts and I don't even know why." I shuffled on the floor looking at the guys. "And I have a wedgie... are my underwear on backwards?" I asked trying to stand up, Jack caught me before my legs gave out.
My thighs and area hurt so bad. I was leaned against Jack's chest when it all came back to me. My drink, I stepped outside and... Will. I pushed from Jack and stepped over to my suit case. I started looking for something to wear throwing clothes everywhere. I had tears in my eyes, I let this happen to me again. I stopped and plopped down on the couch putting my head in my hands. "How did I get back to my bunk last night?"
I dreaded hearing this answer. I lifted my head and watched the boys. "I went outside to look for you but couldn't find you so I grabbed the guys and they helped me look for you. I walked down the side walk and saw a guy that looked a lot like that guy and he turned and I could see the bruises I left and I knew it was him. He left a little alley, I ran over to him and slammed him against a wall. I yelled at him to tell me where you were and he just pointed with a smirk on his face. I ran down the alley and I found you..."
Jack trailed off. I pulled my knees up to my chest and mumbled into the top of them. "What?" Alex asked. I moved my lips from my knees. "I said at least I wasn't awake this time." I sighed and stood up. "How many times has this happened?" Zack asked. "Too many to count.... I'm gonna get dressed." I said. The guys turned around and left the back lounge, all except Alex. "Yes?" I asked him, he just stared at the ground. "Alex?"
I took a step closer to him. "You get that I'm sorry, right?" "Yeah, but it wasn't you that did this to me. It was Will." "Yeah but I started this. If I hadn't been so self conscious of what others thought-" "What are you talking about Alex?" I asked confused, he took a step closer to me. "Paige, I loved you ever since you moved and came to school with us. I wanted you to be mine. I loved your laugh, your smile and the care free attitude, but every time I mustered enough courage to ask you out someone would stand in my way and say that you weren't up to my standards.I remember junior year when I broke my arm, I got into a fight with Johnathan Hurley over you. The truth was I was never good enough for you."
He tried to pull my hand into his. I pulled back and stepped back. "Then W-why did y-you leave that morning?" I asked in a low voice, my tears threatening to spill. "I was scared Paige. Scared that you didn't like me like that. The only person who knew my real feelings was Rian. And the morning I left the kids I called 'My friends' came up with the prank idea." He took a step closer and I jumped back.
I was seething with anger. "Paige, I'm so sor-" "Stop saying that!" I yelled at him. "You regret not staying that night, You don't know if you loved me! I lost everything and anything I cared about, Alex. Now I don't know what would have happened if you would have stayed. Would me be together? Maybe we would be traveling with your band. Would we be getting married, Would we be married? Would we being have a kid? I have no idea, but you never gave us the chance!"
I had a few tears rolling down my face that I wiped away vigorously. "You wanna know a secret? I had a crush on you, but probably no surprise to you. Every girl had a crush on you, they were lined up around the block. I was so excited when you asked me out. If I would have known where the choices of that one night were gonna lead me" His head shot up and listened to the next words leaving my mouth.
"I wouldn't change a thing.I'm happy with the person I've become, overcoming obstacles, and finding myself. I wouldn't change it for anything other than the fact people died for me, I'm no one worth dying over." I finished angry and hurt. Alex opened his mouth to speak but I spoke first. "Alex, I'm sore and would like to get dressed please." He turned and left the back lounge. I put on my new panties and bra.
I pulled on a black stripped sweater and some jeans. I pulled on some socks and shoes. I stood back up and walked out of the back lounge. No one else was on the bus. I stepped off and I saw Mike, I decided not to let my day be ruined. I bumped his hip with mine. "Hey, stranger." I said. He turned and gave me a hug. "I'm ok, I promise. Why are you all sweaty?" "We just finished our set." "And I missed it?!" I yelled. "Yeah, there will be more don't worry." We could see Jack running around like a crazy person.
"What's up Jack?" Mike asked. "We can't find Alex!" He yelled. I stopped and thought where would I go to get away from everyone. That's when it hit me, I'm the only girl on tour. I ran into the venue and straight for the bathroom. I opened the door. I heard gasps for air. "Alex?" I asked. I didn't get an answer but I knew it was him. He gasped for air again, He was having a panic attack. I ran over to the stall door and tried to open it, I couldn't.
I laid on the floor and scooted myself under. I pulled myself over to him. He was shaking and couldn't breathe. I pulled his head to my chest. "Alex. You need to match your breathing with my heart beat, alright? You can do this for me." I said rubbing circles on his back. He nodded. After a few his breathing was almost normal, he gasped every once in a while. I felt terrible for giving him a panic attack.
"Hello there, the angel from my nightmare, The shadow in the background of the morgue. The unsuspecting victim of darkness in the valley. We can live like Jack and Sally if we want..." I slowed my singing down hoping he would join in. "Where you can always find me, We'll have Halloween on Christmas and in the night we'll wish this never ends, We'll wish this never ends." He finished with me.
He leaned up enough only to move his head to my lap. I took my right hand and ran my fingers through his hair. I could feel tears hitting my legs. I wanted him to stop crying. I turned his head to look at me, I wiped the tears away. But he wouldn't look at me. I sighed and leaned forward, pushing our lips together. I went to pull away but he leaned up and pushed me flush against the wall. His hand pulled me closer by my hip. I used my right hand and place it on his cheek.
His hand lead to the small of my back and pulled me into his lap. I pushed on his chest a little making him let go of my lips. He leaned his forehead against mine. "Alex, I can't do this to J-" "He doesn't love you like I do." He said taking my face in both hands and pressing his lips to mine again. I didn't want to let this continue, It was wrong, right? But it felt so right... "Alex, we really can't be-" "Paige, He can have you out there. I have you in here. I want you." "Alex that's your best friend." "I know but-" "No, Alex. Does he even know you like me?"
"No." "Well you need to tell him. I will not be labeled that girl." "I wasn't asking you to-" "Yes you were. 'He can have you out there. I have you in here.' " I repeated what he said. "What happens if I tell him?" He asked. I stood up and unlatched the door. "I don't know Alex." He jumped up and spun my around, slamming me against the wall. His lips crashed to mine again. "If we leave this bathroom, everything just said, all that was felt, all that happened has to be a secret. I don't like secrets." He said against my lips.
I pulled away from him. "Secrets are a good thing sometimes, They hide things and sometimes those things are better left unsaid." I walked out of the stall and out of the bathroom. Alex wasn't far behind me. We rounded a corner. "Alex!" I heard Rian yell. He ran over and pulled Alex with him towards the stage. I walked over to Matt. "Here I thought you might want this." He said handing me my camera. "Thanks." I said and walked over towards the stage.
The pain my body was going through right now was excruciating. For some reason I felt like crying. I felt someones hand on my shoulder. I jumped a little. "Paige, It's ok." I heard Jack say. I moved my hands from my head and opened my eyes. "My body hurts... It just hurts and I don't even know why." I shuffled on the floor looking at the guys. "And I have a wedgie... are my underwear on backwards?" I asked trying to stand up, Jack caught me before my legs gave out.
My thighs and area hurt so bad. I was leaned against Jack's chest when it all came back to me. My drink, I stepped outside and... Will. I pushed from Jack and stepped over to my suit case. I started looking for something to wear throwing clothes everywhere. I had tears in my eyes, I let this happen to me again. I stopped and plopped down on the couch putting my head in my hands. "How did I get back to my bunk last night?"
I dreaded hearing this answer. I lifted my head and watched the boys. "I went outside to look for you but couldn't find you so I grabbed the guys and they helped me look for you. I walked down the side walk and saw a guy that looked a lot like that guy and he turned and I could see the bruises I left and I knew it was him. He left a little alley, I ran over to him and slammed him against a wall. I yelled at him to tell me where you were and he just pointed with a smirk on his face. I ran down the alley and I found you..."
Jack trailed off. I pulled my knees up to my chest and mumbled into the top of them. "What?" Alex asked. I moved my lips from my knees. "I said at least I wasn't awake this time." I sighed and stood up. "How many times has this happened?" Zack asked. "Too many to count.... I'm gonna get dressed." I said. The guys turned around and left the back lounge, all except Alex. "Yes?" I asked him, he just stared at the ground. "Alex?"
I took a step closer to him. "You get that I'm sorry, right?" "Yeah, but it wasn't you that did this to me. It was Will." "Yeah but I started this. If I hadn't been so self conscious of what others thought-" "What are you talking about Alex?" I asked confused, he took a step closer to me. "Paige, I loved you ever since you moved and came to school with us. I wanted you to be mine. I loved your laugh, your smile and the care free attitude, but every time I mustered enough courage to ask you out someone would stand in my way and say that you weren't up to my standards.I remember junior year when I broke my arm, I got into a fight with Johnathan Hurley over you. The truth was I was never good enough for you."
He tried to pull my hand into his. I pulled back and stepped back. "Then W-why did y-you leave that morning?" I asked in a low voice, my tears threatening to spill. "I was scared Paige. Scared that you didn't like me like that. The only person who knew my real feelings was Rian. And the morning I left the kids I called 'My friends' came up with the prank idea." He took a step closer and I jumped back.
I was seething with anger. "Paige, I'm so sor-" "Stop saying that!" I yelled at him. "You regret not staying that night, You don't know if you loved me! I lost everything and anything I cared about, Alex. Now I don't know what would have happened if you would have stayed. Would me be together? Maybe we would be traveling with your band. Would we be getting married, Would we be married? Would we being have a kid? I have no idea, but you never gave us the chance!"
I had a few tears rolling down my face that I wiped away vigorously. "You wanna know a secret? I had a crush on you, but probably no surprise to you. Every girl had a crush on you, they were lined up around the block. I was so excited when you asked me out. If I would have known where the choices of that one night were gonna lead me" His head shot up and listened to the next words leaving my mouth.
"I wouldn't change a thing.I'm happy with the person I've become, overcoming obstacles, and finding myself. I wouldn't change it for anything other than the fact people died for me, I'm no one worth dying over." I finished angry and hurt. Alex opened his mouth to speak but I spoke first. "Alex, I'm sore and would like to get dressed please." He turned and left the back lounge. I put on my new panties and bra.
I pulled on a black stripped sweater and some jeans. I pulled on some socks and shoes. I stood back up and walked out of the back lounge. No one else was on the bus. I stepped off and I saw Mike, I decided not to let my day be ruined. I bumped his hip with mine. "Hey, stranger." I said. He turned and gave me a hug. "I'm ok, I promise. Why are you all sweaty?" "We just finished our set." "And I missed it?!" I yelled. "Yeah, there will be more don't worry." We could see Jack running around like a crazy person.
"What's up Jack?" Mike asked. "We can't find Alex!" He yelled. I stopped and thought where would I go to get away from everyone. That's when it hit me, I'm the only girl on tour. I ran into the venue and straight for the bathroom. I opened the door. I heard gasps for air. "Alex?" I asked. I didn't get an answer but I knew it was him. He gasped for air again, He was having a panic attack. I ran over to the stall door and tried to open it, I couldn't.
I laid on the floor and scooted myself under. I pulled myself over to him. He was shaking and couldn't breathe. I pulled his head to my chest. "Alex. You need to match your breathing with my heart beat, alright? You can do this for me." I said rubbing circles on his back. He nodded. After a few his breathing was almost normal, he gasped every once in a while. I felt terrible for giving him a panic attack.
"Hello there, the angel from my nightmare, The shadow in the background of the morgue. The unsuspecting victim of darkness in the valley. We can live like Jack and Sally if we want..." I slowed my singing down hoping he would join in. "Where you can always find me, We'll have Halloween on Christmas and in the night we'll wish this never ends, We'll wish this never ends." He finished with me.
He leaned up enough only to move his head to my lap. I took my right hand and ran my fingers through his hair. I could feel tears hitting my legs. I wanted him to stop crying. I turned his head to look at me, I wiped the tears away. But he wouldn't look at me. I sighed and leaned forward, pushing our lips together. I went to pull away but he leaned up and pushed me flush against the wall. His hand pulled me closer by my hip. I used my right hand and place it on his cheek.
His hand lead to the small of my back and pulled me into his lap. I pushed on his chest a little making him let go of my lips. He leaned his forehead against mine. "Alex, I can't do this to J-" "He doesn't love you like I do." He said taking my face in both hands and pressing his lips to mine again. I didn't want to let this continue, It was wrong, right? But it felt so right... "Alex, we really can't be-" "Paige, He can have you out there. I have you in here. I want you." "Alex that's your best friend." "I know but-" "No, Alex. Does he even know you like me?"
"No." "Well you need to tell him. I will not be labeled that girl." "I wasn't asking you to-" "Yes you were. 'He can have you out there. I have you in here.' " I repeated what he said. "What happens if I tell him?" He asked. I stood up and unlatched the door. "I don't know Alex." He jumped up and spun my around, slamming me against the wall. His lips crashed to mine again. "If we leave this bathroom, everything just said, all that was felt, all that happened has to be a secret. I don't like secrets." He said against my lips.
I pulled away from him. "Secrets are a good thing sometimes, They hide things and sometimes those things are better left unsaid." I walked out of the stall and out of the bathroom. Alex wasn't far behind me. We rounded a corner. "Alex!" I heard Rian yell. He ran over and pulled Alex with him towards the stage. I walked over to Matt. "Here I thought you might want this." He said handing me my camera. "Thanks." I said and walked over towards the stage.
Notes
Comment Please! Tell me what you think!!! Tell me! Thanks for reading!!! Loves!! :POutfit:http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=102529401
So I just read what you have of this, and really love it so far. I'm bummed to see it was never continued. :(
Shipping Alex and Paige in this story, even though he caused her a lot of pain. But it changed him and they just seem so cute together. It's a bit odd how Jack suddenly went after her, when it seemed like Zack was going to, so it's kind of a lot with three different possible love interests, but I love Paige's story. It's intense but I'm glad she was able to get through it, it just shows how strong she is as a character.
If you ever see yourself continuing this someday, I will be here to read. I think this story deserves an ending. <3
But if not, I just wanted to leave this comment letting you know readers are still stumbling across this and enjoying it. I think you're a really great writer, and hope you're at least still writing on your own time, as I see a lot of your stories have gone unfinished. But it happens.
1/10/17