I went back to my room. I wasn't risking going back to the party, cause I didn't want to deal with Alex, and I sure as hell couldn't face Jack. This sucked, I'm drunk as hell, confused, and now my heart feels like it's dying.

Jack kissed me.

I kissed him back too, and for the moment that I just let it happen, it was amazing. Until I so brutally remembered, Jack was my brother. We can't be doing this sort of thing.

What sucks worse is I don't even know if he meant to. He was clearly drunk too. What if this was just a drunk mistake, and he felt nothing of it, and I'm the only one sitting here freaking out over blossoming feelings? Feelings that shouldn't even exist!

I brought my knees to my chest and hid my face on them. What do I do now? How will I face him tomorrow? Oh God, what if he doesn't even remember it tomorrow? I know I will, I have never had a blackout after drinking. And all I had was beer, no shots or anything. I could hear the voices downstairs get quieter, and soon enough the music was cut off. Guess the party's over. Sighing, I just stayed sitting on my bed, freaking out.

Then there was a knock on my door. Scared shitless that it was Jack, I stuttered out permission for whoever it was to enter.

It was Alex.

“What are you doing here?” I asked, trying not to notice the redness of his face where Jack hit him.
“I just want to know what the hell happened. Did I make you uncomfortable? I didn't mean to, and now Jack won't eve fucking look at me.” Alex complained, walking in.
“I'm sorry.”
“No it's fine.” He assured, sitting by me. “I never took Jack as a 'protective' sibling.”

I wanted to cry at the fact that Alex thought that's all it was. If only he knew, but he did seem to notice something was wrong.

“Are you okay? You seem.... really upset. And freaked.” He asked, sitting by me. “Is it me?”
“Um, no.” I mumbled, and looked at him. “Can you keep a secret?”
“Yeah sure.”
“No really, I just need someone I can trust and talk to and not have to worry about the world hearing about it.” I said in a rush, almost rambling. “Cause I am really freaking out, it has almost not thing to do with you, but I need someone to help me out.”
“Hey hey,” he rubbed my back. “You can trust me, I know I kinda went too far earlier, and I'm sorry. But I really do like you, okay? I can be your friend and help you out. What's wrong?”
“Um, well, when Jack dragged me upstairs we kind had a fight over what happened.”
“Did he hurt you?” He asked, looking concerned.
“No..umm...we kinda uhhh....kissed?”
“What?!” Alex gasped.
“I don't know! One second we were yelling then he was kissing me, and I kissed back, but then I ran away cause-”
“You kissed him back?” Alex interrupted.
“Yes! Okay, I did. I totally did.” I whined, and buried my face in my knees again.

“You like him.” Alex said, after a few moments. My silence only confirmed it. “Holy shit.”
“It's wrong right? I'm weird, I'm so messed up, this is messed up.” I whined, hugging my legs tighter.
“Ember, calm down, okay? Just breathe.” Alex said, and shook my shoulder. “Look at me.” I sighed and complied. “It's okay, it's weird, but okay. You're not actually related, it's just by marriage. And it perfectly normal, it's not like you guys even knew each other before all this.”

“But I don't know what to do now.” I complained. “I mean, for all I know Jack was just stupidly drunk and did it to shut me up or something. Hell, who knows if he'll even remember, which sucks cause I probably will and things are gonna get awkward and-”
“Whoa, slow down and calm yourself.” Alex interrupted, again. “Okay, you have options here. There's till plenty of alcohol downstairs, we can get you so drunk you don't remember, you could confront Jack in the morning, you could just ignore it and hope it goes away...”
“I hate all these options.” I mumbled.
“How did it even get like this? I swear just last week you guys were ready to murder each other.”
“When do you plan on going home?” I asked.
“Um, I could crash here, why?”
“Let me tell you everything that's gone on so far...” I said, and Alex got more comfortable on my bed.

I told him everything. And I mean everything, and surprisingly, he listened really well. I told him how Jack and I had a bathroom war, I told him about Jack bruising my wrists, the apologies, the gifts. I mentioned all our close encounters and how I felt about them. I told him how we started to get along through our 'faking.' I told him why Jack was freaking out the other night about me missing. Alex gave me some advice, or would comment on some things, but over all, he listened. I got it all off my chest, and felt so much better.

“Well, this kinda sucks.” Alex chuckled, we were now laying down on my bed together, after a couple hours of talked.
“What does?”
“That you like Jack and all, I mean, I was serious. I did want to actually date you.” he said looking at me in a way that made me look away from him.
“Oh...sorry.” I muttered. “Why?”
“Probably cause you're different from most girls around here. And smoking hot.”

I smacked him, and he just laughed.

“But don't worry.” He assured. “Can I be your perverted best friend?”
“Sure, you basically know more than anyone else now.” I shrugged, and yawned.
“Awesome.” He leaned over and pecked my cheek. “I promise that your secrets are safe with me by the way.”
“Thanks, but was the kiss necessary?” I asked, wiping the spot with my hand.
“Yep.” he popped, and stretched. “I think we should sleep.”
“Are you planning on staying in my bed?”
“Hell yeah, it's so much better than the couch.” He said, throwing the blankets over us.
“You just want to be in bed with me.” I accused.
“All part of being a perverted bestie.” He said. “Now shut up, I'm trying to sleep.”
“Jackass.” I laughed, before just letting myself relax.

I felt better, but who knows what kind of hell tomorrow will bring.

Notes

Felt like giving Alex some redeeming qualities.