~Jack

The weeks after we found out about the possible gig were a blur of extra shifts and sleeping in class. It's actually a lot harder for four teenage boys to raise $150 on minimum wage than one would think. Actually, Alex doesn't have an actual job. But he's been babysitting every weekend while he looks for one. The guys and I can't blame him though, he hasn't lived here for very long. It's been stressful, but it'll all be worth it in the end if we make it.

Right now Rian and I are taking inventory at the grocery store we work at. It's real close to closing time, and I'm pretty sure we get to clock out when we're done. But inventories a bitch. Especially when you're me and haven't gotten a proper nights sleep in a very long time. But I'm not complaining, we're lucky to even have this opportunity.

"Jack are you even listening to me?" I heard Rian shout at me.

"Oh- what? Sorry man," I stammered, trying to keep my attention on the task at hand.

"I asked if you're feeling ok," he said, "You've been working a lot lately and I don't want you to get sick and not be able to play next weekend. I think you should take tomorrow off..."

"I'm fine," I said, "Yeah, it's a lot of work, but it'll be worth it in the end Ri, you know?"

He nodded, but still looked unsure. It makes me happy that I have friends that care about my well-being... Even when it isn't exactly appreciated. Because even though I'm dead tired and often dizzy or lightheaded, it doesn't matter to me. This means so much to me. This isn't just a about the gig, it's about my- our future.

It's also a way to get Alex away from the toxic household he's living in. I don't know how I got this way, but everything I do goes back to keeping him safe. Just because his mother doesn't abuse him doesn't mean he's safe though. He's practically living on his own, at such a young age. He deserves, and needs to be loved. And as much as I'm trying to love him, he needs more than one source. And if we make it big, he'll receive so much love.

When we make it big, playing in front of hundreds of people, he'll have to believe he's worth something, right? In a perfect world, my support and kind words would be enough to convince him. But the world's not perfect, he needs to constantly be reassured by more than one person.

I sighed and went back to counting boxes of macaroni. Finding it increasingly harder to keep track. My head was spinning in every possible direction, I felt as if I might be sick. But I kept going, when I get done with this I can go home and sleep for a few hours before getting up to do homework. Yeah, a nap would be nice.

But I lost count as my vision started to blur. I leaned up against the shelf to keep myself steady; I don't need to be falling. But my knees became increasingly weak and wobbly. Eventually they gave out all together and I fell to the ground with a loud, and quite painful, thud.

The last thing I heard before blacking out was Rian yelling my name.

~

When I came to my head was pounding and my back ached. I noticed I was laying on the couch in the break room. I saw Rian sitting at the desk doing something.

"Ri," I croaked, just now realizing my throat was burning, "What happened?"

He turned around and smiled at me, while getting up and walking towards the couch, "You passed out and hit the floor. Scared the shit out of me too, next time I tell you to take a break you better fucking do it!"

I rolled my eyes and sat up slowly. Rian handed me a can of Coke, which I gratefully took, relishing in the first long sip.

"I'm driving you home as soon as you feel better," he said, "Don't even try to say no. You're also not coming in tomorrow. You're going to stay home from school too, you need sleep. Maybe if you're lucky Alex'll ditch for you."

"I'm not going to argue you driving me home and ditching with Alex tomorrow," I started, "But we need the money..."

"Actually, speaking of your wonderful boyfriend," he said smirking, "I just got off the phone with him. He said that the babysitting job he had this evening payed enough to finish up the money we still needed. Hell we'll be able to use our paycheck on stuff we need for the show."

A smile came to my lips, we're actually doing this. We're playing this venue. This is real. I honestly can't believe we did it. I thought we end up being like five dollars short or something ridiculous like that.

"Is the inventory done?" I asked, "I'm ready to go home as soon as it's done."

"I finished it while you were out," he said, smirking again, "Now let's go."

Notes

Title Cred: What Are You So Scared Of?- Tonight Alive

*Pst* Hey you, don't be a ghost reader... ;)

~Mary <3