It's been a week since we went to the beach. I haven't really left my bunk that much. Matt sorta let me off the hook but would check on me every once in a while, mostly it was Jack or Alex. They would make me sit up and talk to them. I was laid down in my bunk not really paying attention to anything. It has been really tough knowing I let the guys down and that now I have huge ugly scars across my legs, but really I didn't care. I was laid in my bunk playing with a feather. No one was up yet and it's about 5:30 am. "I like big butts and I can not lie!" I rolled over and picked up my phone.

Me: Yes, Chris.
Chris: Paige...
Me: *I sat up he never uses my first name, always my nickname* What's wrong Chris?
Chris: T-there was an accident a-and I-I couldn't... I mean it was all my fault and I-I don't know who else to call...
Me: Chris calm down, what happened and who is hurt?
Chris: Paige... It's Bass. I'm so sorry, He asked me to come get him and I did but I had had some to drink too and we got into an accident and the car hit his side and he was pinned... I don't know what to do-
Me: Chris, I'll be there calm down. What hospital is he at?
Chris: Baltimore Medical. God! I'm so stupid!
Me: Chris breathe, I don't know when I'll be there but I'll be there ok?
Chris: Ok, but... I umm... Bass is in critical condition.
Me: I'm gonna come as fast as I can alright. Love you and I will call you again.
Chris: I'm so sorry Paige, I'll see you soon.

I hung up and jumped out of my bunk. I ran to my suit case and pulled on some jeans and a shirt. I shuffled on some converse and picked up my phone. I went to my bunk and grabbed my wallet. I ran to the front pf the bus and opened the door. It was still dark outside. I pulled out my phone and called a taxi. They pulled up and I got in. "I need to get to the nearest airport." I said to the man.

"Alright." He started moving and I sat back thinking about what was gonna happen if he never woke up. What would I do? He was my rock when I needed him most, I had to be there for him. He doesn't have anyone else and it was only fair from all the help he had given me. My thought were interrupted by the driver. "We are gonna be there in a minute." "Ok thank you." I said and he pulled up to the entrance. I gave him some money and ran into the building.

I ran up to the desk. "I need a ticket to Baltimore, Maryland." I told the woman. "Well you're in luck, they're boarding now." I gave her my card and ran to get checked. They checked me and I ran to my seat. I sat down and tried to breathe. I couldn't though. Terrible things were being screamed across my head. If I never would have left Baltimore I could have been the one to drive him. I'm so selfish. That's how the whole plane flight went.

I got off the plane and ran out front. I hopped in a cab. "Baltimore Medical please." I said to the man driving. "Ok, how was your flight?" "Fine." I was in no mood for small talk. We pulled up to the hospital. I jumped out and ran through the building to the front desk. "Mam, I need Sebastien Grey's room number." "Room 344." She said. I ran around the corner and saw Chris standing in front of the window of his room. I stopped dead in my tracks, tears starting their way down my cheeks.

"Chris." I said in a low voice. He turned and I saw his face, red and puffy eyed, crying hysterically. I ran over to him and pulled him into a hug. He cried on my shoulder and his face into my chest. "Chris, it's ok. He'll be fine, It's Bass. He has to be." I said trying to reassure him but more myself. "P-paige. I'm a terrible person, I did this to him!" He yelled into my chest. I just gripped him tighter. "Chris, It's not your fault. It was unavoidable. It was an accident." "I know, I just feel so guilty!" He broke down in sobs again.

Bass is Chris's best friend. He pulled away from me. "I'll be ok, I'll be ok." He whispered to himself. "Chris, Go home. Take a shower, I'll be here. I'm not leaving." I said holding his shoulders in my hands. He shook his head and grabbed his bag and started to walk away. He turned back around and gave me a hug. "T-thanks for coming back." "Of course." I said and he left my grip. I watched him round the corner. I stood there for a minute afraid to turn around.

I did turn but very slowly. I made it around and walked up to the window. my hand jumped to my mouth as sobs escaped. I thought I was gonna be sick. I stepped back until my back hit the wall. I slid down and took my knees against my body. I sat there and cried for what felt like hours, letting the tops of my knees get drenched in my tears. " Sick of saying sorry when I'm not but after a little love that's, That's all I've, That's all I've got" My phone sang. I barely had the energy to pull it out of my pocket. I did and noticed it was Matt.

Me: Matt, I-I can't talk right now-
Matt: Where are you?!
Me: I'm back in Baltimore, I had to come back-
Matt: Why?! And why didn't you tell anyone?!
Me: I had to leave then or else I never would have made the plane, Bass is in the hospital. Matt I'm his emergency contact and h-he needed me.
Matt: Hey, don't cry. We have a show tonight but we'll cancel a few and come up-
Me: No Matt! You can't do that to fans! You can't let the guys do that!
Matt: Paige, I have you on speaker. It was their idea.
Alex: We wanna be there for you-
Jack: We can't stand to see you upset.
Matt: So we'll see you soon.
Me: You guys don't need to come, I'll be fine.
Matt: Please don't argue.

I hung up my phone and tossed it to the floor. I heard someone pick it up. "Excuse me?" I looked up to see a man in scrubs hand me my phone. "Are you here for Mr.Grey?" "Yes, yes! Is he gonna be ok?" I asked standing up. "He has a punctured right lung, several broken ribs, he's in a comma like state right now. His face was also beaten, due to the car sliding against the asphalt." I took in a breath. "Is it alright if I go in there and see him?" I asked. "Yes, just don't touch him or at least be gentle with him."

He walked away I stepped into the room. "Oh my god, you have to wake up Bass. I can't live with out you, you're my best friend." I sat down in the chair next to his bed. "I like big butts and I can not lie!" I pulled out my phone.

Chris: Do you want anything from my house?
Me: My guitar, that's it.
Chris: Alright.

I hung up and turned my attention back to Bass. "You promised you would never leave me... You p-promised." I broke down in yet another fit of tears as I watched my best friend lie there with no sign of ever getting up. I huddled over and held my face in my hands. Someone was punishing me, but it wasn't fair to make him the victim. I heard a knock and my eyes shot up. "I brought your guitar... do you mind if I go back home? I haven't been asleep yet in almost two days and I can't stand looking at him..." "Yeah, go on. You can call me to see how he's doing. I'll be here the whole time."

He came over after placing my guitar into another chair. He pulled me into a hug. "I love you, Izzy. I don't think I tell you enough, thanks for always being there for me." "Your welcome, Chris. Now go sleep, he'll be awake before you know it." I gave him a smile not only reassuring him but myself. He pulled away and kissed my cheek. He left the room and silence filled the room along with a subtle beep every once in a while. I sat back down in the chair just staring at the boy I owed my life to. "I wont give up on you Bass, I wont." I lightly kissed the side of his head.

I walked over and picked up my guitar. I picked it up and tuned it really fast. I set it down on my lap. I decided I was only gonna play the songs Bass loved or showed me how to play. I strummed a small pattern before breaking out into the song. I closed my eyes letting my fingers teach my brain what the notes were.

"Love of mine, some day you will die
But I'll be close behind
I'll follow you into the dark
No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white
Just our hands clasped so tight
Waiting for the hint of a spark

If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the "No"'s on their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark

In Catholic school as vicious as Roman rule
I got my knuckles bruised by a lady in black
And I held my tongue as she told me,
"Son, fear is the heart of love."
So I never went back

If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the "No"'s on their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark

You and me have seen everything to see
From Bangkok to Calgary
And the soles of your shoes are all worn down
The time for sleep is now
It's nothing to cry about
'Cause we'll hold each other soon
In the blackest of rooms

If Heaven and Hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the "No"'s on their vacancy signs
If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark
Then I'll follow you into the dark"

I set the guitar down and folded into myself. Of all songs to play, I chose that one. I picked up the guitar with tear stained eyes and started to sing yet again. "You make me happy, whether you know it or not we should be h-happy, that's what I said from the start I am so happy kn-nowin' you are the one that I want for the rest of my days for the rest of my days, yo all of my d-days" I didn't even wanna finish the song. I dropped the guitar to the floor and scooted closer to him.

"Bass." No answer. "Bass." I took his hand in my own. "Bass." I said a little louder. "Sebastien Neil Grey, I-If you don't wake up right now, I swear to god I can't survive with out you." I laid my head on the bed and cried, I cried and cried until the bed where my face was was soaked. I leaned up and brushed some hair off his face. "I-I don't know what to do Bass. I'm so messed up, my life is so difficult with our you. And you've only been gone a couple days." I laid my head back down.

I heard talking and opened my eyes and rolled over in the chair. I stretched and stood up. "Hey..." Matt said. I turned and looked at him. "I thought I told you to stay." "Paige, you needed me and I'm your older brother, I wanted to be there." He took a step closer and I lunged into his embrace. I buried my head into his shoulder and started to cry. "H-he has a c-colapsed lung-g and broken rib-bs. They don't know anything else. Matt, I'm scared." "Hey, he'll wake up don't worry."

"I hope so, He deserves life more than me." I said. "BEEP, BEEP, BEEP........BEEP, BEEP.....BEEEEEEEEE" Some machine in the room sang. They two people came in and pulled us out. I fought against Matt and got back in the room but got stopped by another man. "Miss-" "Sebastien! Bass! Don't you dare leave me! Bass!" I yelled as he pulled me out of the room. I went to run back in but someone took a hold of me, wrapping their arms around my chest. "Let go! Bass! Bass! Don't leave me!" I yelled. Said person turned me around and held me close to them.

I tried to push away but they wouldn't let go. "I don't wanna do it anymore, I don't wanna..." I whispered starting to calm down. I stopped struggling and gripped onto their shirt. "I don't know w-what to do anymore." I said crying against their chest. "Paige, calm down. Everything is gonna be fine, everything is gonna be fine." Alex said while petting the back of my head. "Have I told you lately how much I love you?" I looked up at him, his eyes were wide.

"Cause I do, I love all of you and I don't know... I just want you guys to know that. I don't want our last words to be stupid, you know?" I said tears still streaming down my face. "Yeah, I got you." He said and pulled me in for another hug.

Notes

comment please... I have no idea if he'll die or not so your guess is as good as mine... Thanks for reading!!! LOVES :P

Outfit:http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=103632874