Sad, Beautiful, Tragic
Wonderwall
Alex sat across from Madison in the window side booth, the red plastic vinyl covering squeaking as he shifted forward to rest his elbows on the table. He watched on curiously as Madison took the spare waffle cone she ordered and begin breaking it into pieces before carefully arranging the broken pieces into her ice cream bowl. With the last piece placed in the center of her ice cream, Madison looked up and grabbed her spoon. Her cheeks turned pink when she caught Alex’s eyes.
“What?” She bit her lip, looking up at him from underneath her long eyelashes.
“You’re intriguing” Alex blushed, he was always open with his feelings but Madison made him nervous. Not because he was scared of her but because she had the power to break him and she didn’t even know it.
Madison scooped a spoonful of birthday cake ice cream and cone piece into her mouth, unsure how to reply to Alex’s statement.
“So,” Alex said a mouthful of ice cream in his mouth “favorite color?”
“White” Madison replied immediately.
Alex stared at her, confused “white?” he asked incredulously.
“Yes, white” Madison narrowed her eyes at him, silently daring him to judge her.
“Well….why white when there are so many colors to choose from?”
“Because white is clean. It’s blank and it means you can do whatever you want with it. You can start wherever you want, you can do anything…” Madison trailed off and Alex realized that maybe Madison wasn’t talking about the color at all. He reached his hand across the table to grasp hers, but stopped just short. He didn’t want to push his luck and lose her all over again, not after just getting her back.
Madison watched as Alex’s hand sat just in front of hers, his fingers drumming on the table and their ice cream left melted and forgotten. She bit her lip, a habit she couldn’t seem to break and with a final push in her mind she placed her hand in Alex’s, nervously intertwining their fingers. He lightly squeezed her hand, setting the butterflies into motion in her stomach. Without a word Madison stood up, pulling Alex with her.
Their trash left on the table “damn kids” a middle aged woman muttered at the two as they pushed their way out the door and into the hot summer air.
“Where are we going?” Alex asked but was only met with silence as Madison continued to pull him down random roads until they finally reached a small clearing filled with wild flowers.
“you said you wanted to know everything, right?” Madison turned towards the boy, finally dropping his hand and instead crossing her arms across her chest protectively. Alex noticed that she always did that when she felt uncomfortable or unsure about something.
Alex nodded and waited for the explanation that he knew would be following her inquiry “we should start with the big things and move down the line, its backwards I know…but it’ll be easier to do while I have the nerve”
“So…this place?”
“This is where I want to be buried” Madison’s eyes filled with tears, something that had never happened before when she talked about dying. She never cried over it, she had always just accepted it. When she was first diagnosed and still lived with her biological parents, her dad used to tell her there was no use in crying over something they couldn’t change. Back then she was so sure that if she acted strong for her dad that they would keep her but that didn’t happen. She was adopted into a new family and from there Madison learned it was better to build a strong shield because bad things happen and you can’t change them but at least you could keep yourself standing. Thus, the hard exterior she had perfected was the result of years of pushing everyone away. Besides, why do you need people if you’re just going to die?
Alex felt his heart break as he watched the strongest girl he had ever met breakdown into sobs. He immediately pulled her into his arms. His arms wrapped tightly, protectively around her frame and his lips placed numerous kisses to her temple.
“shhh…Mads, it’s okay.” He whispered over and over again until her body stopped shaking. He unwound his arms from her body and reached up to cup her face, his thumbs wiping away the traces of her tears.
“Jack said you weren’t scared…”
Madison shook her head “I wasn’t” her eyes trained on the ground
“What happened?” Alex asked, his hands still cupping her face gently
Madison looked up, her eyes staring straight into his “I met you” she whispered honestly.
Alex knew now more than ever that he had to help her complete her list, he took a shot into the dark "will you go to the fair with me this saturday?" and just like that his plan was set into motion
“What?” She bit her lip, looking up at him from underneath her long eyelashes.
“You’re intriguing” Alex blushed, he was always open with his feelings but Madison made him nervous. Not because he was scared of her but because she had the power to break him and she didn’t even know it.
Madison scooped a spoonful of birthday cake ice cream and cone piece into her mouth, unsure how to reply to Alex’s statement.
“So,” Alex said a mouthful of ice cream in his mouth “favorite color?”
“White” Madison replied immediately.
Alex stared at her, confused “white?” he asked incredulously.
“Yes, white” Madison narrowed her eyes at him, silently daring him to judge her.
“Well….why white when there are so many colors to choose from?”
“Because white is clean. It’s blank and it means you can do whatever you want with it. You can start wherever you want, you can do anything…” Madison trailed off and Alex realized that maybe Madison wasn’t talking about the color at all. He reached his hand across the table to grasp hers, but stopped just short. He didn’t want to push his luck and lose her all over again, not after just getting her back.
Madison watched as Alex’s hand sat just in front of hers, his fingers drumming on the table and their ice cream left melted and forgotten. She bit her lip, a habit she couldn’t seem to break and with a final push in her mind she placed her hand in Alex’s, nervously intertwining their fingers. He lightly squeezed her hand, setting the butterflies into motion in her stomach. Without a word Madison stood up, pulling Alex with her.
Their trash left on the table “damn kids” a middle aged woman muttered at the two as they pushed their way out the door and into the hot summer air.
“Where are we going?” Alex asked but was only met with silence as Madison continued to pull him down random roads until they finally reached a small clearing filled with wild flowers.
“you said you wanted to know everything, right?” Madison turned towards the boy, finally dropping his hand and instead crossing her arms across her chest protectively. Alex noticed that she always did that when she felt uncomfortable or unsure about something.
Alex nodded and waited for the explanation that he knew would be following her inquiry “we should start with the big things and move down the line, its backwards I know…but it’ll be easier to do while I have the nerve”
“So…this place?”
“This is where I want to be buried” Madison’s eyes filled with tears, something that had never happened before when she talked about dying. She never cried over it, she had always just accepted it. When she was first diagnosed and still lived with her biological parents, her dad used to tell her there was no use in crying over something they couldn’t change. Back then she was so sure that if she acted strong for her dad that they would keep her but that didn’t happen. She was adopted into a new family and from there Madison learned it was better to build a strong shield because bad things happen and you can’t change them but at least you could keep yourself standing. Thus, the hard exterior she had perfected was the result of years of pushing everyone away. Besides, why do you need people if you’re just going to die?
Alex felt his heart break as he watched the strongest girl he had ever met breakdown into sobs. He immediately pulled her into his arms. His arms wrapped tightly, protectively around her frame and his lips placed numerous kisses to her temple.
“shhh…Mads, it’s okay.” He whispered over and over again until her body stopped shaking. He unwound his arms from her body and reached up to cup her face, his thumbs wiping away the traces of her tears.
“Jack said you weren’t scared…”
Madison shook her head “I wasn’t” her eyes trained on the ground
“What happened?” Alex asked, his hands still cupping her face gently
Madison looked up, her eyes staring straight into his “I met you” she whispered honestly.
Alex knew now more than ever that he had to help her complete her list, he took a shot into the dark "will you go to the fair with me this saturday?" and just like that his plan was set into motion
@Beautifulbreakdown
Ah yay! It's so so soooooooo good and I was in tears last night reading it and Im being such a typical white girl cos I literally can't even!
1/27/15