I felt light kisses on my neck. Light kisses that soon turned rough and passionate. I didn't know what was happening, but I really liked it. Hence the moan that just slipped from my mouth.

"Wh-at are you d-doing?"

"Shh." Alex said into my skin.

"Alex..?" My trembling voice was barely above a whisper.

"Just shut up, Avery."

And then he twisted me around in his arms, placing a not so innocent kiss on my lips. I could barely breathe, his lips were pressed against mine so hard. I tried breathing through my nose, but my brain wasn't able to comprehend such an advanced maneuver what with it in it's jumbled state.

"Open your mouth, Ave." Alex mumbled against my lips.

He didn't have to say it again. My mouth flew open and welcomed Alex's tongue like a baby bird getting a worm from it's momma. That didn't even make sense.

Alex was like an effing wild man when it came to making out. I knew those singer lungs were good for more than just that. He could hold his breath for the longest time, I had trouble keeping up but I had some practice too.

"I want you so bad." Alex started tugging at the bottom of my shirt.

I buried my right hand in his hair. "I'm all yours."

With that said, Alex ripped off my shirt. Taking his lips from mine, he kissed his way down to the swell of my breasts. I threw my head back, gasping for breath, as Alex started to ravish the top of my breast. Biting and sucking away.

I reached back and unclasped my bra. After throwing that aside, and making sure Alex paid close attention to my very erect nipples, I started with his pants. The palm of my hand started to rub him on top of his bottoms.

The vibration of Alex's moan was echoed through my whole body.

His hands replaced his mouth as that was brought back to mine. Our lips played together like little toddlers at a neighborhood park.

"God, you're good at this," Alex sighed.

"So I've heard." I smirked.

Alex flashed his smile at me before going back to kissing me. My mind was whirling with every dirty thought I've ever had. Having Alex touch me like this was basically my best dream come true.

He started rubbing me through my pajama bottoms, and I swear I was going crazy. I had to rip my mouth away from his to let out an ear piercing moan. Alex wasn't unfazed as he moved his lips back to my neck.

I closed my eyes. It felt like I was about to explode from my lower half. It was kind of embarrassing on my part. I knew I couldn't let myself go that easily.

I had to show him that I could play this game too.

I don't think he sensed my hand trailing down his body, but he definitely knew where my hand was when it landed over him. His lips hummed against my neck as he moaned.

We both started rubbing each other at the same pace. I was quite confident that I could lastlonger than Alex as he started bucking into my hand.

"L-l..uhh." Alex quivered.

I rubbed him faster, he was close.

"Li-s.." Alex moaned again.

I figured he was trying to say something but couldn't form the words.

"Lisa." He gasped in a quick breath.

What?

My rubbing started to slow down.

What did he just say?

"Lisa!" He cried in a louder voice.

Fucking bitch.

My eyes snapped open, and I felt different.

I looked down and my shirt was on properly. Like it was never ripped off by Alex. I looked at my heat and Alex's hand was nowhere near it. I looked at Alex and he was laying flat on his back, his hips thrusting upward. Into my hand.

Oh shit.

It was a dream. All of it was just a fucking dream. Except for the part where I was rubbing Alex.

That was definitely happening.

But he was sleeping. Dreaming.

He thought I was Lisa.

The panic started to kick in then. Should I let him finish and risk the chance of getting caught? Or should I just get out of there when I could?

I decided on the latter. No fucking way was I gonna let him catch me rubbing him.

Alex's bed was small, so I was able to slip my body off with ease. It was removing my hand that was the tricky part. I didn't want to just take it off cause that would wake him up.

I replaced his hand with my own. His own hand was just as experienced as mine apparently. It took to rubbing him very well.

Now, I was free to make my escape.

I slipped out of his door and shut it quietly behind me. I ran straight to my room and locked the door behind me.

My back burned as I slid down the door, crying. Asides from last night, I never really cry. I don't really count last night either, Tom is a special case.

So it was weird for me to be crying now. I guess the past two years have just caught up with me.

I cried for Alex. I cried for the fact of never really being able to love anyone but him. I cried because I would never really be loved by anyone. I cried because of the way Alex looks at Lisa. I cried just for the fucking sake of crying.

Then there was a knock on the door.

My heart raced. What if Alex was really awake and knows everything?

"Avery?"

I let out a sigh. It wasn't him.

I stood up and wiped furiously at my face, trying to hide the tears. What a joke.

I opened my door slowly to reveal Jack. "Yes?"

"I thought I heard someone up." Jack looked up from his feet to my face. "Shit, Avery, what's wrong?"

I shook my head, only producing more tears.

Jack wrapped me in his arms and I buried my head in between his neck and shoulder.

"Avery?"

I pressed my lips against his cool skin. "It h-hurts so ba-ad."

I felt Jack's hand press into the back of my head as I cried harder.

Suddenly he was shrinking.

"Jump."

I did as told, and suddenly Jack was carrying me.

He was remarkably strong for such a thin boy.

He brought me to my bed and laid me down. Climbing in as well. I willingly threw myself back into his arms as he cocooned us in my comforter.

"Ave.."

"I don't understand Jacky.." I whispered.

"What?"

I pulled back a little to look at him dead on. "Why can't I be loved?"

Jack pulled me back in for an even tighter hug. "You are. By everyone."

I shook my head again. "Why can't someone be in love with me?"

"Someone is. Trust me."

"Why can't they tell me?"

Jack laughed. "Not everyone is willing to get their heart stomped on."

"Do I give off that vibe?" My eyes were wide. "Do I seem like a mean person? I would never.."

"I know, I know. Some people just don't want to take the chance."

"I wish they would.." I whispered.

Jack said something that sounded like, "I'll keep that in mind," but I wasn't sure.

All I knew was that he was here for me right now. That's all that really mattered.

Notes

I decided to update in reponse to Alex's twitter updates.

Oh you silly people. Alex has two dogs, Sebastian and Peyton. There is no Skippy. But I will confess that I helped trend #RipSkippy cause honestly, why would I pass up the opportunity to have Alexander William Gaskarth shower me with eternal love-touching?

Anyways, lovelies, do your thing and comment and what not!