Dear Veronica Count Me In

Come the promised Saturday
And I never thought I was “eager” to meet up with the Alex Gaskarth

Yes,
The master of all mischief and trouble
The infamous vocalist for the legendary All Time Low
The goofy and extremely annoying, most perverted, yet the only person capable of making me so confused and deliriously happy

Above all,
A man who has a heart of gold, willing to put others before himself, but is a mystery wrapped around a mystery

I was, and I couldn’t even believe myself, wanted to come across him again.

Crap! what have I been thinking?
I’m always in a constant inner battle of either I let myself feel them or stop them before it develops into something far more complex and complicated

Dear Lord, what spell has this one heck of a guy cast upon me to feel feeling I forbid myself to feel?

Especially, from yesterday’s events

I kept recalling the way he smiled carelessly with me, not knowing that smile is makes my stomach do multiple somersaults

The perverted yet full of desire and passion method of talking to me.

Also how, we were in the most (un)fortunate accidents fate has offered me (besides the skateboard one from not very long ago. When we tumbled down to the floor, and logically based on Newton’s Law on gravity.
That when one thing has been thrown out of force, it must come down

And fall.
Maybe I have fallen for him already…

FUCK THIS IS THE PROOF THAT I’VE REALLY GONE INSANE AND GO CHECK IF I HAVE BRAIN DAMAGE

However, at our approximate 3 centimeter gap, he couldn’t resist himself
Plus I, on the other hand; against all odds, allowed him to “satisfy” his so-called hunger
His gentle touch, the touch of his utmost soft lips, he left with a trail of delicate kisses on my neck.
His warmth, like a fire that engulfing and burning me within,
An intense heat that set us both ablaze during that intimate moment of ours
Damn, he also smelled good, a mixture of his own distinct scent and stale ketchup, if I was correct

Still, at the weirdest of circumstances, and we were
About to
Almost
On the point of
More or less
Super duper close and
Quite near to what mushy and crappy undenyingly cliché’- romantic fairy tales are made of
What everyone is dying to have, or just have a slight taste of
This gesture of love that has not ever failed to do miracles and change the world(or so they say)
By just one magical…

Kiss

In a matter of seconds and millimeters away, we should have. But that wasn’t a big deal, it wasn’t probably a serious issue. A fling to sum it all up, I might have thanked Jack from sparing me.

Everything I felt was still very evident, like Alex’s presence never did leave me

Though, I won’t forget the way that he was so hyper in creating an ingenious mark in our school’s history; the food fight
A plan so unexpected and nonsensical, yet the best fun the school ever had in years

Alex Gaskarth was truly a kid at heart, his playful spirit is his most winning trait

But that look on his face when he spoke at the unknown caller.
Terrified and frightened, like it was Hitler came back to the dead and is speaking to him
The wondrous smile he had was ripped away in an instant and replaced with a gloomy frown.
I worried a lot for him and his friends, whom was just as scared as he was
As they departed and left in a notion, I was more puzzled than I’ve ever been.

The entrance doors flung open and in the hallway entered Alex.
I was alarmed and caught off-guard, two hours have gone by and the assigned task of Principal Vic for this day, I have already finished in waiting for him

I started to head out towards him but…

He hung his head low and unyielding hidden in a hoodie, hands deeply shoved in the pocket
Alex doesn’t do that in particular
I immediately knew there was something very wrong
I knew this would happen, the guy he was talking to should have caused it, unfailingly
But I was unprepared, having no idea on how to help him without…
I have to try

“Alex, tell me what did that guy you spoke to the phone did to you and the rest?”
He still hung his head low and kept his mouth shut
“Alex, talk to me please, I want to help you…”
Blatant ignorance.
“Alex”

I shoved his hoodie cap off and pulled his face out of the looming darkness
His eyes shown so much rage, resentment, and pain…
Then I noticed that he had his right hand plastered with gauze and bandages
And I swear

It was still bleeding

“Alex, oh God…”
I caressed his cheek and clasped carefully his injured hand, lost at words and sympathizing over him

"Did you do this yourself?"
He faintly nodded.

Only, something or someone who has done so much damage and made him, and maybe the rest of All Time Low, suffer so much is capable of doing that, because he may be powerful or had charismatic influence

“Alex, I beg of you, I’m desperate for ending your misery and I will take away your hurt. Just give me the chance, please. It saddens me so much to see you like this”
I was in the middle of being frantic and determined to reach out to him.
That’s when, he held my hand, hugged me close, and mumbled weakly and faltering
“I need you, Veronica, I need you so so much”

We went to the outskirts of the gymnasium, near the courtyard, and sat on the cemented pavement.
Alex still held to me, and I wasn’t going to let go him. Neither give up in trying to make him feel better.
“What happened? And who did this to you?” I asked

“It doesn’t matter who that damn person is. But I’d like you to know what we, All Time Low, had gone through. The price of being famous, also why we went to Packett anyway, and the real meaning of Therapy to us”

I was ready to listen, listen to the truth that I have been yearning ever since they first stepped into Packett.

“We are the world’s most stupid idiots!” he ironically exclaimed

“Yes, we were just kids too, who had dreams of becoming known and become legends like Green Day and New Found Glory. Kids who had pathetic dreams, but still believed in them no matter what, and practiced hard for achieving that”

“We were the best of friends, specifically Jack, and we’d been together through the good, the bad, and the ugly. We formed the band, when we thought our skills were somehow decent already. All Time Low rehearsed like heck, and played the fuck out of every gig; we gave our best in all the shows. Yet, criticism was not avoided, we were not yet enough. Days became weeks, weeks became months, and months into years.”

“We went from record studio to another, gaining some few fans and slowly getting recognized. That was until we got our big break, Hopeless Records. At Hopeless Records, we wrote the most out-of-this-world and coolest songs; worked so hard for our upcoming album, the editing and the production people were great. So was their media exec, who broke our name to the whole world.”

“The album was a hit, it sold thousands of copies worldwide, and everybody knew and worshipped All Time Low. We were always in the top billboard charts and collaborated with our idols. We were at tours and massive concerts with lots and lots of fans screaming and cheering for our name. All Time Low was at the top of their game and having the time of our lives. We thought no one was going to stop us.”

“Yup, all our dreams fantasies ended when fame had gotten into our heads. We did thought we were the best and no one could beat us. Arrogance and pride corrupted our minds and we became lost with the first reason we were making music. We traded our visions of changing the world and saving lives through fun; by doing it for money instead. And with the reputation and cash we had, we had changed drastically”

“We went to parties, got drunk all the time, took some weed. We acted wild, and scored scandals that were so terrible, yet we didn’t care. We were rock stars, and who gives a fuck, the paparazzi loves this shit. We were so careless that the record company was warning us that they will sign us out if we didn’t stop. We didn’t, and so they did really sign us out, that was the cost of our irresponsibility”

I was so shaken and taken aback by Alex’s words. It was very hard to believe and completely take in. Piece by piece, the puzzle was being completed, and the more Alex spoke. It only made me understand him further.
But I had to be there for him and the story was just halfway through…

“All Time Low was so lost, nobody took us in, we were pleading and promising them that we would be better. But not even the lowest record company would take us, instead they were disgusted and dishonored to have us in. “

“Afterwards, Go- , I mean GS, the executive of Conflict Resolution Records, saw remaining potential on the hopeless turds we were and gave us a chance. We were grateful, but not entirely. That’s because GS was strict and he had a short temper. He’s a mo-“

Alex choked on his words, I was on the verge of knowing what kind of person had done this to him. But he wasn't holding it back.

"Come summer, and we should have had a concert in Maine. But it got cancelled, because of the lack of bought tickets. Due to that, GS's punishment for us was to go to high school and attract more social attention. It was a media ploy"

So that's why


He gazed at me for a while and just face-palmed himself,
“Well, that person isn’t important now, but I’ll protect you from that guy. No matter what happens, I won’t let you get hurt from him”

“Alex, who is he and what-?”

“He’s a monster alright! And we have to deal with it, since he’s our only chance left.”
Alex exploded with the rage and hurt he had been keeping underneath, releasing it all out in a single lash on me…
I was taken aback and entirely shocked, but when I saw the look in his eyes.
Constricted with enough anxiety, anguish, and angst; that had been tormenting his soul for too long
I have to try in sparing him from his pains,
And try hard I will…

“Alex, look at me” I directed him willfully

“The man I knew, is an eager and energetic person, game to do new things; always excited”
“The man I knew, was a rebel and a rule-breaker. Who not ever had stop in mischief making and causing trouble”
“The man I knew, wore an ear to ear grin in his face, bursting with joy or sometimes horniness, and didn’t fail to turn somebody’s frown into a smile”
“The man I knew was…a completely infuriating though charming guy who’d swept you of your feet and is full of surprises”
“The man I knew, was also the lead of the legendary pop-punk band, All Time Low”
“With record-breaking smash hits, they dominated the world with songs full of attitude, yet extraordinarily saved thousands of lives, including mine”
“I heard the album you gave me. Your music is spectacular and I myself can say that I’m already a fan!”
“The man I knew, most importantly, was a dreamer”
“He had a vision and the will to make things happen, and wouldn’t allow anybody or anything to take it all away from him”

I paused and let a tiny smile escape from the corner of my mouth
“Are you that man? Or are you seriously just going to be a miserable nobody?”

Alex Gaskarth suddenly tightened his embrace
He locked his arms around me and pressed his lips on my forehead
Well I, just like the last time, was totally still and not moving a bit
Unbelievable

“Oh, Maria Veronica Di Angelo”
“What would I do without you?”
He uttered my name so gracefully, that miraculously my heart almost skipped a beat

“Alex, you can live on without me. You’d do great” I chuckled

“Hell no, if it weren’t for you I might have jumped off the building right now. You saved me, Veronica, I owe you my life”
“You proved to me that I was wrong, that I can still become better and be at the top of my game once more. And I shouldn’t let GS manipulate us like his puppets”

“I was shattered glass, broken beyond repair. Yet you picked up my pieces and restored me. For that, I’m forever indebted to you”

“But, I’m just an ordinary average girl. Why me?” I protested

“God forbid, what will happen to me if you didn’t enter my life. And dammit don’t say that”
The second I heard that my pulse was racing furiously and I could see that my face was turning tomato red
“You’re the most beautiful, clever, insanely hilarious without even trying girl I’ve ever known. But specifically your kindness has won me over”
“You never fail to fascinate me”
“As I said, I should have jumped off a building right now, or maybe have myself run over a train. The options weren’t that tough to choose with” He jokingly said

“Alex!” stammering

“See, you always worry about me. Heck, I just love you so so much, Veronica”

Defenseless and without any notice

He impulsively willed his lips against mine, but it was so quick and light, like a butterfly that just fluttered.


“Jerk, don’t ever do that to me again so suddenly” I laughingly complained
“But I thought you liked my surprises?”
“And you’re in love with this jerk too, anyway?” Alex teased
“Fine, whatever, I love you too”

And in this inglorious Saturday afternoon
I, Veronica Di Angelo
Even fully aware of the dangers of falling in love, and strictly vowed to myself to don’t even try it
Surrendered
To the Alex Gaskarth
Who was once what I’ve hate and now become what I’ve love

Oh dear…


Somebody please pray for my soul.

Notes

So I'm back! :D (from the dead) and just recently posted the latest 3 chapters. alex's secrets have been revealed and i hope nobody got a heart attack from all the fictional truth i wrote
I wish you all like it and wish you all merry christmas (kiss my ass) and happy holidays

p.s. i promise the next chapters are going to be great! and don't worry
happy times are at sight (or are they?)
well we'll never know :)
-Cait