The Remains of my Wasted Youth
013
Rebecca’s POV
*Flashback*
I looked good. That’s what I thought to myself when I looked in front of the mirror. However I felt stupid. I was all dressed up just for another normal day at school, but I had to look nice, he would be there. I couldn’t help but feel stupid though, feeling this way about my bestfriend.
He had a girlfriend anyway, she was tall, blonde, skinny. Shes completely fake but Max loves her. I was nothing compared to his girlfriend Heather. All the boys were after her, yet Max got her. I hated her, she was using Max, everyone in the group except Max could see it. The amount of times me and Josh had sat around and joked about her fakeness and bitchiness. He was the only one who truly knew how I felt about Max. He had told me countless times to tell Max how I feel, but I couldn’t. He would never see me the way I see him, I was just this fat, ugly, weird friend of his who was forever annoying other people, I had no chance. I sigh as I pick up my bag and head downstairs.
“Good Morning sweetie.” My mum says as I walk into the kitchen. I mumble a morning before grabbing a piece of toast.
“Well someones tired.” My dad mumbles, looking up from his paper, still dressed in his dressing gown.
“Well she was up all night texting Maaaaaaaax.” Comes the voice of my extremely annoying brother, Jake.
“Becca!” my mum scolds, “I told you not to stay up all night talking to some boy.”
“But it’s not some boy mum, it’s Max, remember you like him.” I defend myself.
“I don’t care, I do not want my 13 year old daughter up all night texting a boy, do you hear me?” my mother replies, ignoring the silent laughter from Jake.
“Yes.” I sigh.
“Good, now hurry up and get to school. Jake go grab your bag and your keys, you’re going to be late.” Sighs my mother, going on with her morning ramblings.
***
We arrive at school after 10 minutes of driving, me giving Jake the silent treatment the whole way as he told mum about me staying up to talk to Max.
“You going to keep ignoring me?” asks Jake as we walk into school.
I stay silent, giving my answer as a yes.
“Fine, whatever, least you’ve shut up for once.” He says before turning and going in the opposite direction. I let out a frustrated sigh and take the route to where the group waits for me.
“WELL HERE SHE IS! THE BEAUTIFUL REBECCA THOMAS EVERBODY!” Comes the loud, obnoxious voice of my close friend Josh.
“Ah Joshie, you always know how to make a girl feel special and loved.” I tease, gently taping his arm causing him to blush a little.
“Well you are. Special that is.” He replies looking down, losing his cocky attitude. I giggle before wrapping my arms round Josh’s middle, giving him a hug. I pull away, my eyes connecting with Max, who’s staring at me, as if questioning mine and Josh’s exchange.
I couldn’t help but notice that Max wasn't being clawed at by the she devil. Where was Heather? Also why was he staring at me like that?
“Well let’s head off to form.” Says Chris, checking his watch for the time. We all nod and start to walk before I feel someone grab my wrist. I turn round coming face to face with Max.
“Yeah, well catch up.” He shouts to the group who nod and keep walking.
“What’s up?” I question as Max lets go of my hand.
“What was going on back there with Josh?” questions Max, raising an eyebrow.
“What do you mean?” I ask confused.
“Oh please you were both flirting!” he exclaims.
“What? No we weren’t!” I reply, utterly confused. Even if we were flirting…why would it matter?
“You totally were!” he shouts back.
“Why does it matter?” I question causing Max to go quiet. I look at him, studying his facial expression.
“I don’t know…I just don’t think you and Josh should get together.” He says quietly before looking up.
“And whys that?” I question studying him, wishing in the pit of my gut for him to say that he cares for me.
“Because you’re my bestfriend and I don’t want you to get hurt, you’re my friend Becz, I’d hate to see Josh hurt you.” He replies before hugging me and walking off.
Friend. That was all I was and all I ever would be.
*End of Flashback*
I sit in the back of the bus, thinking about everything that’s happened. I couldn’t believe that I had bumped into the guys again; I couldn’t believe that my past had come back after so many years burying it. I let out a sigh taking a swig from the bottle of whisky, letting the drink burn the back of my throat.
I had found out everything that had happened between Alex and Max. I had seen the damage Alex had caused to Max’s face…he was covered in bruises. It felt like everyone always got hurt when I was around, especially after what happened between Alex and Kendra in high school when Alex lost his memory. I just brought everyone bad luck. There was also a part of me that was angry at Alex, he didn’t need to do that to Max, and he didn’t deserve it. I and Alex ended up arguing over everything when he accused me of protecting Max. I rub a hand over my face, knowing sleep won’t come tonight.
I stand up and grab a pair of converses, a coat as well as my key to the bus, along with my phone and earphones. Quietly, I sneak off the bus, careful not to wake everyone up. Stepping off the last step I start on my walk around the parking lot. Its 4:28am, everyone on the tour would be asleep and the parties would be well over by now. I stalk through the parking lot, coming to an abandoned picnic table. I sit down, putting my earphones in and listening to the sweet sounds of Ben Howard’s The Fear.
I've been worryin' that my time is a little unclear
I've been worryin' that I'm losing the ones I hold dear
I've been worryin' that we all, live our lives, in the confines of fear
Suddenly I feel a hand on my shoulder, causing me to rip the earphones out of my ears and stand up suddenly. Just as I’m about to scream, I realise who is in front of me.
“What are you doing here?”
*Flashback*
I looked good. That’s what I thought to myself when I looked in front of the mirror. However I felt stupid. I was all dressed up just for another normal day at school, but I had to look nice, he would be there. I couldn’t help but feel stupid though, feeling this way about my bestfriend.
He had a girlfriend anyway, she was tall, blonde, skinny. Shes completely fake but Max loves her. I was nothing compared to his girlfriend Heather. All the boys were after her, yet Max got her. I hated her, she was using Max, everyone in the group except Max could see it. The amount of times me and Josh had sat around and joked about her fakeness and bitchiness. He was the only one who truly knew how I felt about Max. He had told me countless times to tell Max how I feel, but I couldn’t. He would never see me the way I see him, I was just this fat, ugly, weird friend of his who was forever annoying other people, I had no chance. I sigh as I pick up my bag and head downstairs.
“Good Morning sweetie.” My mum says as I walk into the kitchen. I mumble a morning before grabbing a piece of toast.
“Well someones tired.” My dad mumbles, looking up from his paper, still dressed in his dressing gown.
“Well she was up all night texting Maaaaaaaax.” Comes the voice of my extremely annoying brother, Jake.
“Becca!” my mum scolds, “I told you not to stay up all night talking to some boy.”
“But it’s not some boy mum, it’s Max, remember you like him.” I defend myself.
“I don’t care, I do not want my 13 year old daughter up all night texting a boy, do you hear me?” my mother replies, ignoring the silent laughter from Jake.
“Yes.” I sigh.
“Good, now hurry up and get to school. Jake go grab your bag and your keys, you’re going to be late.” Sighs my mother, going on with her morning ramblings.
***
We arrive at school after 10 minutes of driving, me giving Jake the silent treatment the whole way as he told mum about me staying up to talk to Max.
“You going to keep ignoring me?” asks Jake as we walk into school.
I stay silent, giving my answer as a yes.
“Fine, whatever, least you’ve shut up for once.” He says before turning and going in the opposite direction. I let out a frustrated sigh and take the route to where the group waits for me.
“WELL HERE SHE IS! THE BEAUTIFUL REBECCA THOMAS EVERBODY!” Comes the loud, obnoxious voice of my close friend Josh.
“Ah Joshie, you always know how to make a girl feel special and loved.” I tease, gently taping his arm causing him to blush a little.
“Well you are. Special that is.” He replies looking down, losing his cocky attitude. I giggle before wrapping my arms round Josh’s middle, giving him a hug. I pull away, my eyes connecting with Max, who’s staring at me, as if questioning mine and Josh’s exchange.
I couldn’t help but notice that Max wasn't being clawed at by the she devil. Where was Heather? Also why was he staring at me like that?
“Well let’s head off to form.” Says Chris, checking his watch for the time. We all nod and start to walk before I feel someone grab my wrist. I turn round coming face to face with Max.
“Yeah, well catch up.” He shouts to the group who nod and keep walking.
“What’s up?” I question as Max lets go of my hand.
“What was going on back there with Josh?” questions Max, raising an eyebrow.
“What do you mean?” I ask confused.
“Oh please you were both flirting!” he exclaims.
“What? No we weren’t!” I reply, utterly confused. Even if we were flirting…why would it matter?
“You totally were!” he shouts back.
“Why does it matter?” I question causing Max to go quiet. I look at him, studying his facial expression.
“I don’t know…I just don’t think you and Josh should get together.” He says quietly before looking up.
“And whys that?” I question studying him, wishing in the pit of my gut for him to say that he cares for me.
“Because you’re my bestfriend and I don’t want you to get hurt, you’re my friend Becz, I’d hate to see Josh hurt you.” He replies before hugging me and walking off.
Friend. That was all I was and all I ever would be.
*End of Flashback*
I sit in the back of the bus, thinking about everything that’s happened. I couldn’t believe that I had bumped into the guys again; I couldn’t believe that my past had come back after so many years burying it. I let out a sigh taking a swig from the bottle of whisky, letting the drink burn the back of my throat.
I had found out everything that had happened between Alex and Max. I had seen the damage Alex had caused to Max’s face…he was covered in bruises. It felt like everyone always got hurt when I was around, especially after what happened between Alex and Kendra in high school when Alex lost his memory. I just brought everyone bad luck. There was also a part of me that was angry at Alex, he didn’t need to do that to Max, and he didn’t deserve it. I and Alex ended up arguing over everything when he accused me of protecting Max. I rub a hand over my face, knowing sleep won’t come tonight.
I stand up and grab a pair of converses, a coat as well as my key to the bus, along with my phone and earphones. Quietly, I sneak off the bus, careful not to wake everyone up. Stepping off the last step I start on my walk around the parking lot. Its 4:28am, everyone on the tour would be asleep and the parties would be well over by now. I stalk through the parking lot, coming to an abandoned picnic table. I sit down, putting my earphones in and listening to the sweet sounds of Ben Howard’s The Fear.
I've been worryin' that my time is a little unclear
I've been worryin' that I'm losing the ones I hold dear
I've been worryin' that we all, live our lives, in the confines of fear
Suddenly I feel a hand on my shoulder, causing me to rip the earphones out of my ears and stand up suddenly. Just as I’m about to scream, I realise who is in front of me.
“What are you doing here?”
Notes
New update for you! I'm not sure if I like it though! You're gonna have to tell me what you think guys! I apologise for the wait!
I just started reading a few days ago, and I'd def read more! Love it!
2/28/17