Call Me Foolish, I Feel Hopeless
I'm Going To Find The Time
Jack Barakat
When I awoke the next morning, the pounding in my head was making me want to scream. Without trying to wake up Alex, I rolled over, falling onto the wood flooring.
"Class in five." Alex's voice pierced through my head. Groaning, I picked up a random shirt off the ground and squirmed my way into some skinny jeans. Running a hand through my hair, I groaned. I didn't have time to do much else so I ran out of the cabin, into the classroom.
"Glad you can join us Mr. Barakat." Our songwriting teacher raised an eyebrow, interested in my appearance.
"Woke up late." I mumbled, taking my seat next to Alex, to realize he wasn't even there. I was so concerned on getting here, I didn't even realize where he went. I instantly felt guilty. Is there something wrong with him? Did I do something? I tried to think back to last night, thinking of every move I made. I played the night in my mind, and when I got to the cabin image I gasped.
I kissed him. I fucking kissed him and I was drunk. How romantic? Groaning, I put my head on the desk, thinking about how fucked up I made this whole situation.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I'm sorry about this morning." I apologized to Alex as soon as I came back from class. He was facing me, guitar in his lap.
"It's fine." He muttered, writing down something into his notebook. I took a chance by sitting on his bed. He moved away a bit, a frown overtaking his beautiful face.
"Alex. Can we please talk?' Sighing, Alex nodded, putting down his guitar. "I know this isn't the best way to say all of this. I messed up, big time. I kissed you while I was shitfaced, and that wasn't fair on you. You deserve some knight and shinning armor, caring for your every move. A guy that will keep you safe and make you happy. I just can't help but like you Alex." I finished my speech, and tears were in his eyes. "You deserve better." I said quietly, looking down at my hands.
"J-jack..." Alex started, but I didn't let him finish.
"Don't bother. Please don't." I choked back a sob, standing up from the bed.
"Damn it Jack, let me talk." He yelled, making me flinch. He gave me an apologetic smile as he took a deep breath.
"I like you too Jack. I was so scared that kiss meant nothing to you when it meant everything to me." Alex looked me in the eyes, tears falling down his cheeks. I wiped them away, making him laugh through his tears. "You're perfect. If anything I don't deserve you."
"Never say that again." I threatened, smiling at the effort Alex made to admit all of this.
'But it's tru-" He started once again, but I cut him off by pressing my lips onto his. Once we pulled away we stared at each other, grinning like fools.
"So does this mean were together?" I questioned, hoping for a positive answer. He nodded quickly, making me smile even wider.
"I really do hope so." Alex joked, grabbing my hands, entwining his fingers.
"Me too. Me fucking too."
When I awoke the next morning, the pounding in my head was making me want to scream. Without trying to wake up Alex, I rolled over, falling onto the wood flooring.
"Class in five." Alex's voice pierced through my head. Groaning, I picked up a random shirt off the ground and squirmed my way into some skinny jeans. Running a hand through my hair, I groaned. I didn't have time to do much else so I ran out of the cabin, into the classroom.
"Glad you can join us Mr. Barakat." Our songwriting teacher raised an eyebrow, interested in my appearance.
"Woke up late." I mumbled, taking my seat next to Alex, to realize he wasn't even there. I was so concerned on getting here, I didn't even realize where he went. I instantly felt guilty. Is there something wrong with him? Did I do something? I tried to think back to last night, thinking of every move I made. I played the night in my mind, and when I got to the cabin image I gasped.
I kissed him. I fucking kissed him and I was drunk. How romantic? Groaning, I put my head on the desk, thinking about how fucked up I made this whole situation.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I'm sorry about this morning." I apologized to Alex as soon as I came back from class. He was facing me, guitar in his lap.
"It's fine." He muttered, writing down something into his notebook. I took a chance by sitting on his bed. He moved away a bit, a frown overtaking his beautiful face.
"Alex. Can we please talk?' Sighing, Alex nodded, putting down his guitar. "I know this isn't the best way to say all of this. I messed up, big time. I kissed you while I was shitfaced, and that wasn't fair on you. You deserve some knight and shinning armor, caring for your every move. A guy that will keep you safe and make you happy. I just can't help but like you Alex." I finished my speech, and tears were in his eyes. "You deserve better." I said quietly, looking down at my hands.
"J-jack..." Alex started, but I didn't let him finish.
"Don't bother. Please don't." I choked back a sob, standing up from the bed.
"Damn it Jack, let me talk." He yelled, making me flinch. He gave me an apologetic smile as he took a deep breath.
"I like you too Jack. I was so scared that kiss meant nothing to you when it meant everything to me." Alex looked me in the eyes, tears falling down his cheeks. I wiped them away, making him laugh through his tears. "You're perfect. If anything I don't deserve you."
"Never say that again." I threatened, smiling at the effort Alex made to admit all of this.
'But it's tru-" He started once again, but I cut him off by pressing my lips onto his. Once we pulled away we stared at each other, grinning like fools.
"So does this mean were together?" I questioned, hoping for a positive answer. He nodded quickly, making me smile even wider.
"I really do hope so." Alex joked, grabbing my hands, entwining his fingers.
"Me too. Me fucking too."
8/28/13