Useless is a Dirty Word
Careless
Mentality can be the reason that a lot of things happen. On an impusle, I decided to go to a bar in Paris. It was my luck (or misfortune, jury is still out on what it was) that I happened to meet Alex in that particular bar. We had talked about so much that all the stories blurred together. I could cherry pick my best moments with him, but then it would disregard the fact that almost our entire moment together was a good moment. It only made sense that the bar we met in would be where we ended up intereviewing together.
Alex grinned at me.. and I could already tell he was nervous. I couldn't blame him - I was nervous too. I was nervous because I knew that being seen with Alex would either cause people to hate me endlessly for simply being a girl who knew Alex or adored because I was a sexless girl who posed no threat to them. It's interesting that they feel the need to tell me if I can or cannot have sex with someone who's an old friend. The inteview already was ignoring me for Alex. I couldn't blame her. He might be an old friend, but even I could see the appeal in a six foot something guitarist and singer. Well, I can see the appeal if everything was... er proprtional. I sure hope for the gangly singer's sake that everything was propritional.
I could hear the interviewer giggling at everything Alex was saying, even though I knew what he was saying wasn't something she should be laughing at. It bugged me that she thought it was funny that he hadn't had a real date in two years. Alex was the dating kind - as much as other people tended to overlook that fact. He liked to woo a girl because it made him feel like he could actually do something right for once. "Ma'am," I said sweetly as I could, "I was wondering if you have some sort of condition that causes uncontrollable laughter cause you sure as heck can't seem to stop it."
Alex glared at me and I knew right away he disapproved of me being rather catty with the interviewer. I couldn't exactly fault him for hating that. I was just so sick of hearing her flirt with him. The girl said something in French that I didn't quite understand beyond a French swear. Alex ran a hand through his hair before flashing a charming grin at the girl. "Sorry," he said, aggervating me as he began to apologize on my behalf, "she hasn't done an interview in a while."
It aggrevated me that Alex had apologized for me but I knew that at least I wouldn't have to apoglize to her. I wasn't sorry and I was bad at giving false apologies. Never really saw the point in being fake with these girls. They saw enough fake to know when it wasn't geniune. His smile was every bit as warm and inviting as I remember, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. I wondered how comfortable he really was. I ran a hand through my hair, catching it in a tangle. Someone yelled, "Three minutes."
Three minutes to try and get comfortable with a lady I didn't really care for. Maybe it was cruel of me to dislike her so fast. She could be nice for all I knew. "Oh," she said suddenly, "Lucky, you've lost weight."
Because my weight is highly relevant to my singing, I thought in pure anger. Alex looked slightly uncomfortable by the sudden shift to me. I was angry. "Yes," I said, "touring does tend to take the pounds off because I'm dancing every night. But I wasn't aware my weight was of any relevance."
The awkwardness was in the air seconds after I said that and I should have known better. I should have simply thanked her and talked to Alex about it later. Playing with my hair was a bad habit I had picked up from Alex and I tended to play with it when I was nervous. "I apologize, I didn't realize that you were one of those people," she said serenly and my overanalytic brain began to tear what she had said to pieces. Maybe she was an awful person. "Anyway, we need to get this interview underway. So... Lucky... what made you dye your hair blue?"
For some reason, the fact the first thing she asked was about my hair rather than my music annoyed me. I always did hate the severe focus on my looks. Everything felt so fake that way. "Why did Alex dye his pink," I fired back, a small grin on my face as I remembered his cotton candy colored hair.
Alex grinned, and I couldn't tell if he was honestly smiling or just fed up with me being difficult. Most likely, he was tired of me being difficult. Hopeless romantic didn't suit me and I wasn't going to fool myself into believing maybe there was hope for us. "Oh, you know, we dyed our hair so people would know I'm a girl and she's a guy," he joked, his charisma coming through.
The girl, of course, hung on Alex's every word. It was impossible not to. Even I could barely conceal my laughter before it turned into a cough. The girl turned to me, a sweet smile that barely masked her contempt for me on her face. "Are you alright?"
I shook my head, deciding that if I was going to be difficult, I might as well do it thoroughly. "No, I'm gonna die in three days," I told her with a serene smile on my face, as if I didn't despise her.
Alex had raised an eyebrow at me and I wondered what happened to our telepathetic connection that I used to know so well. As the interview went on, it ws far more clear this wasn't going to end well. Towards the end came the golden question I had been waiting for. "So, Alex," she paused for a second before she went on, "Lucky... do you think there will be any collobrations between All Time Low and Lucky Stardust? Think maybe Ziggy Records could allow that for the fans?"
I turned to Alex, biting my lip. I brushed a lock of hair out of my face before I said, "I dunno. It's all up to Ziggy if they want to let me just record around." I laughed lightly, shaking my head when I realized that wasn't the truth. If I wanted to collabrate, I would damn well do it. "Actually, no it's not. It's if Alex and I find a song that clicks for both of us. Then we'll see what happens from there."
Alex nodded before he looked up at me in confusion. He shrugged before he added on, "Yeah. If we're feeling it, sure, why not? We're not gonna do anything that feels forced. But if we do collobrate, it'll be awesome."
And for some reason... I just knew he was right.
Alex grinned at me.. and I could already tell he was nervous. I couldn't blame him - I was nervous too. I was nervous because I knew that being seen with Alex would either cause people to hate me endlessly for simply being a girl who knew Alex or adored because I was a sexless girl who posed no threat to them. It's interesting that they feel the need to tell me if I can or cannot have sex with someone who's an old friend. The inteview already was ignoring me for Alex. I couldn't blame her. He might be an old friend, but even I could see the appeal in a six foot something guitarist and singer. Well, I can see the appeal if everything was... er proprtional. I sure hope for the gangly singer's sake that everything was propritional.
I could hear the interviewer giggling at everything Alex was saying, even though I knew what he was saying wasn't something she should be laughing at. It bugged me that she thought it was funny that he hadn't had a real date in two years. Alex was the dating kind - as much as other people tended to overlook that fact. He liked to woo a girl because it made him feel like he could actually do something right for once. "Ma'am," I said sweetly as I could, "I was wondering if you have some sort of condition that causes uncontrollable laughter cause you sure as heck can't seem to stop it."
Alex glared at me and I knew right away he disapproved of me being rather catty with the interviewer. I couldn't exactly fault him for hating that. I was just so sick of hearing her flirt with him. The girl said something in French that I didn't quite understand beyond a French swear. Alex ran a hand through his hair before flashing a charming grin at the girl. "Sorry," he said, aggervating me as he began to apologize on my behalf, "she hasn't done an interview in a while."
It aggrevated me that Alex had apologized for me but I knew that at least I wouldn't have to apoglize to her. I wasn't sorry and I was bad at giving false apologies. Never really saw the point in being fake with these girls. They saw enough fake to know when it wasn't geniune. His smile was every bit as warm and inviting as I remember, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. I wondered how comfortable he really was. I ran a hand through my hair, catching it in a tangle. Someone yelled, "Three minutes."
Three minutes to try and get comfortable with a lady I didn't really care for. Maybe it was cruel of me to dislike her so fast. She could be nice for all I knew. "Oh," she said suddenly, "Lucky, you've lost weight."
Because my weight is highly relevant to my singing, I thought in pure anger. Alex looked slightly uncomfortable by the sudden shift to me. I was angry. "Yes," I said, "touring does tend to take the pounds off because I'm dancing every night. But I wasn't aware my weight was of any relevance."
The awkwardness was in the air seconds after I said that and I should have known better. I should have simply thanked her and talked to Alex about it later. Playing with my hair was a bad habit I had picked up from Alex and I tended to play with it when I was nervous. "I apologize, I didn't realize that you were one of those people," she said serenly and my overanalytic brain began to tear what she had said to pieces. Maybe she was an awful person. "Anyway, we need to get this interview underway. So... Lucky... what made you dye your hair blue?"
For some reason, the fact the first thing she asked was about my hair rather than my music annoyed me. I always did hate the severe focus on my looks. Everything felt so fake that way. "Why did Alex dye his pink," I fired back, a small grin on my face as I remembered his cotton candy colored hair.
Alex grinned, and I couldn't tell if he was honestly smiling or just fed up with me being difficult. Most likely, he was tired of me being difficult. Hopeless romantic didn't suit me and I wasn't going to fool myself into believing maybe there was hope for us. "Oh, you know, we dyed our hair so people would know I'm a girl and she's a guy," he joked, his charisma coming through.
The girl, of course, hung on Alex's every word. It was impossible not to. Even I could barely conceal my laughter before it turned into a cough. The girl turned to me, a sweet smile that barely masked her contempt for me on her face. "Are you alright?"
I shook my head, deciding that if I was going to be difficult, I might as well do it thoroughly. "No, I'm gonna die in three days," I told her with a serene smile on my face, as if I didn't despise her.
Alex had raised an eyebrow at me and I wondered what happened to our telepathetic connection that I used to know so well. As the interview went on, it ws far more clear this wasn't going to end well. Towards the end came the golden question I had been waiting for. "So, Alex," she paused for a second before she went on, "Lucky... do you think there will be any collobrations between All Time Low and Lucky Stardust? Think maybe Ziggy Records could allow that for the fans?"
I turned to Alex, biting my lip. I brushed a lock of hair out of my face before I said, "I dunno. It's all up to Ziggy if they want to let me just record around." I laughed lightly, shaking my head when I realized that wasn't the truth. If I wanted to collabrate, I would damn well do it. "Actually, no it's not. It's if Alex and I find a song that clicks for both of us. Then we'll see what happens from there."
Alex nodded before he looked up at me in confusion. He shrugged before he added on, "Yeah. If we're feeling it, sure, why not? We're not gonna do anything that feels forced. But if we do collobrate, it'll be awesome."
And for some reason... I just knew he was right.
3/10/13