His camera and a tank of gas, that’s all Jack Barakat really needed. Having no real family left it wasn’t like he needed a place to call home; that was a plus though with his job. Being a traveling photographer was a bit hard when you were always missing your family, so thankfully that wasn’t something he’d have to worry about.

Pulling into the nearest Starbucks, Jack quickly grabbed his computer bag and wallet and made his way inside. That was the downside of being a traveling photographer; his boss always emailed him his assignments so he’d have to find coffeehouses, or restaurants that offered free Wi-Fi so that he could find out where to go next.

After ordering a black coffee in hopes of keeping himself up for just a little bit longer, he grabbed a table that was off in a corner with barely anyone else nearby and started up his computer. Rubbing at his eyes as it was booting up, Jack let out a yawn before sipping at his coffee.

When his computer announced ‘you’ve got mail’, he turned his attention back to the computer and search through his inbox for his employer’s name. There it was third name on the list, ‘Shawn Collins’. Opening the email he scanned the text hoping that the city name would just pop out at him, he could always find out why he needed to be there later on, once he had finally made it there.

“Baltimore,” Jack groaned to himself. The one thing that he had always asked of his boss was to never make him go back, that’s where all the memories were. Quickly skimming the rest of the email he read as his boss apologized profusely, but he had no other choice, because in Shawn’s word, ‘Jack was the best and only man for the job’.

Slamming is laptop shut, Jack quickly downed the rest of his coffee and decided it would be best to make his way to Baltimore now so that he wouldn’t put it off, and he could get it done, so he could leave sooner.
~*~*~*~
Three days later and he was passing a sign that said “Welcome to Maryland” and he couldn’t help but feel his heart clench. He never wanted to come back here; he never wanted to have to relive all the horrible memories, but here he was, about to face it all. ~*~*~*~ At home in Baltimore Alex Gaskarth was living his life and trying to get through this horrible day of work; going out that night with his great friends, Rian and Zack would make it worth it all. Most people would say that he was just whining and that work wasn’t that bat, but after you had the day Alex was having, you’d agree with him. Not only had his manager called him this morning to come in three hours early to cover the shift of someone who had gotten fired earlier that day, but he had also cut himself at least seven times. Most of the times it was a small little scrape here and there, but the worst cut off them all was when he accidently caught his finger on a small slice of metal.

“Alex, why don’t you get out of here a little early,” his manager, who he hated seven hours ago, said making him one of the happiest guys in the world.

“Are you sure?” he asked trying to make it seem as though he wasn’t way too eager to leave.

“Positive,” she smiled. “I really appreciate you coming in early to cover Dana’s shift, and since we have two other people working tonight, it will be okay if you bail out a little early.”

“Awesome, thanks Amber,” he said with a smile before going over to the time clock and punching out, mentally fist pumping with happiness that he was done for today, and the next two days.

Once he had gotten his sweatshirt out of his locker, Alex grabbed his iPhone and texted Rian to let him know that they could head to the bar a few hours early, if the other boys wanted. When his phone vibrated he couldn’t help but smile when he saw Rian’s message.

Meet you there in 20.
~*~*~*~
Twenty minutes later Alex was turning around and smiling as he heard his name being shouted across the bar by a smiling Rian Dawson.

“How did you get lucky enough to get out of work so early?” Zack asked as he gave Alex a ‘bro hug’.

“I went in early to cover the shift of some girl that got fired, so I got to leave just as early,” he said with a smile. This was one of the first times in weeks that he had gotten the chance to hang out with Rian and Zack at the same time, so he was a little more than excited.

“Awesome, so who’s ready for some shots?” Rian asked with a smile as he started making the way over to the bar. “I’m buying the first round.”

“In that case, get me three,” Alex said with a laugh as he grabbed Zack’s hand and pulled him towards the bar.
~*~*~*~
Eight shots later Rian, Zack, and Alex decided that they had had enough and they were going to walk to Alex’s house and watch Star Wars for the rest of the night.

“That last shot was a really bad idea,” Alex groaned as he rubbed at his temples. Why he thought eight shots in less than an hour would be a good idea, he didn’t know.

“I think it was the last three shots that were bad ideas,” Zack said leaning into Rian slightly.

As Rian worked on helping Zack stay upright, Alex feel behind them a bit getting distracted by the lights of the city. It was only when he was drunk that he found lights interesting. While he was staring at the street light above him, he couldn’t help but see a shooting star, and wish for the same thing he did every time he was one.

“Dude, stop staring at the stars and lets go,” Rian said as he pulled on Alex’s arm and forced the younger boy to start moving.

“Rian, he’s just wishing for a certain person to come home. Just let him be,” Zack said through a laugh. What was funny? No one knows, except for Zack’s alcohol clouded mind of course.

“Dude, it’s been five years. If he hasn’t come home yet, he’s never going to,” Rian said as they slowly made their way up the steps of his house.

“He will, one day, I know it,” Alex said as he fished his keys out of his pocket and unlocked the door as quickly as he could in his state.

“You’re going to be sleeping on our couch tonight,” Rian said to Zack as he dragged his stumbling, drunk friend over to the living room couch.

“But your guy’s couch is so uncomfortable,” he whined as Rian started walking out of the room and to the hall cupboard to get a pillow and blanket.

“Sorry dude, Cassadee’s got the guest room,” Alex said with a shrug before he took the stairs two at a time and made his way to his own room where he quickly climbed into bed, clothes and all.

“Do you seriously think he’s still holding out hope?” Rian asked as he threw a pillow at Zack’s face.

“Yeah, I really do, and I’m glad he is, because I think he’ll come back too. You saw how in love they were. You don’t just forget someone you love that much,” Zack said as he spread out the blanket and made a make shift bed on the couch.

“I hope you’re right, because I hate seeing how torn Alex is.”
~*~*~*~
“Can I help you sir?” the young woman at the front desk asked with a smile as Jack approached her.

“I’m hoping to rent out a nice room for about two weeks,” he said returning his smile as he set his bag down on the floor next to him and his wallet on the counter knowing he’d need to give her an ID and credit card soon enough.

“Is a one bedroom suite for ninety-five dollars a night okay with you?” she asked a few minutes later once she had stopped typing on the computer in front of her.

“That should be just fine,” Jack said grimacing slightly at the extremely flirtatious smile and wink she sent him.

“Alright, I’ll just need a credit card and some ID,” she said extending her hand towards him.

Reaching into his wallet Jack produced both of the requested cards and hoped that the clerk would work quickly and let him get away from her insistent flirting.

“Well, here are your cards,” she said with a smile as she started clicking away on the keys again. “You’ll be in room 613. It will be up on the sixth floor at the end of the main hallway.”

“Thank you,” he said practically ripping the card out of her hand before quickly grabbing his bags and darting over to the elevator, quickly hitting the up arrow a hundred times until the door opened and he could get away from the clerks staring.
~*~*~*~
One he was safely in his hotel room Jack finally out the breath he didn’t know he’d been holding. Why did he choose this hotel? He used to work here. Hell for all Jack knew he could still work here.

“Back again I see,” the desk clerk laughed as Jack walked up to the desk with a bright red color coating his cheeks. “Usually when someone checks out they wait at least a day before coming back, not an hour.”

“I know, I just forgot something,” Jack mumbled shyly as he looked up at the older boy through the hair that was falling over his eyes.

“And that would be?” the clerk asked wearing a smirk that not only made Jack’s heart flutter, but made him realize that he knew exactly what Jack was trying, and slightly failing at doing.

“Your number,” he said as his blush turned an even deeper shade of red.

“How about I do you one better,” he said making Jack’s eyebrows raise in question. “It’s time for my lunch break. Take me out to lunch and we can call it our first date,” he suggested as an older woman, who Jack could only assume was his replacement to cover his lunch, walked behind the counter.

“I would love to,” Jack smiled as the clerk walked out from behind the counter and grabbed his hand, waving to the older woman before leading Jack out of the hotel and down to a café down the street.

Thinking of that time all those years ago when he stayed at this same hotel with his family when their house flooded. He couldn’t help but think that maybe he came here in hopes of seeing and maybe being with a certain hotel clerk again.

The more Jack thought about it the more he remembered and the more unrealistic it become. He would be on his way to his next job in a matter of weeks; plus he had no doubt in his mind that he moved on already. Who would hold out hope for someone like Jack, he was so undeserving of love anyways.
~*~*~*~
The next morning Alex awoke to the smell of bacon cooking, which was a rare occurrence in their household. If bacon was cooking that meant that either Cassadee ad gotten up early and made them all breakfast, or Zack was making breakfast in a way to thank Alex and Rian for letting him spend the night.

After switching the shirt he had fallen asleep in last night for a new one, he quickly made his way down the stairs and towards the kitchen.

“Morning Alex,” Cassadee said with a smile as Alex sat down beside Rain and Zack at the table and started dishing up some food for himself.

“Morning; sleep well last night?” he asked hoping that he wasn’t annoying her with the questions. Even though she’s been dating Rian for two years now and has been spending the night at their house for about just as long; he still found it awkward talking to her.

“Wonderfully,” she said with smile as she grabbed the last of the bacon that was cooking and brought it over to the table. “Thanks for asking.”

“No problem,” he smiled before digging into his food.

“Aren’t you going to ask how I slept?” Zack asked feigning hurt.

“I already know what you’re going to say. ‘The couch was too lumpy and I had trouble staying asleep.’ It’s the same thing you always say when you spend the night on our couch,” Alex said throwing a smirk over to Zack.

“He does have a point dude,” Rian said saving Alex from Zack’s intense glaring.

The rest of their meal was filled with light chit-chat and laughing; until Zack announced that he had to get going and offered to drop Alex at work if he was able to get ready quickly.

“You sure it’s no problem to drop me off?” Alex asked as he climbed into Zack’s car and hooked his seatbelt.

“Alex, you work like three blocks from my house. I really don’t mind at all; plus maybe this way I can stop inside and pick up some things for the house,” he said as he buckled up and turned on the car.

“I just don’t want to put you out,” Alex mumbled.

“Stop worrying so much,” he laughed before pulling out of the drive way and made his way to the store Alex was now employed at.

The rest of the ride to work was quiet between the two and it wasn’t until Alex was halfway to the break room to put his jacket away that he realized that he never thanked Zack for the ride. Over the last few years Alex had lost quite a few friends, and he was always scared of losing Rian and Zack, so small things like not saying thank you always scared him. Before opening his locker he made sure to send off a text to Zack saying thank you for the ride. With the text sent he took off his coat and turned off his phone before stuffing both items into his locker and shut it behind him.
~*~*~*~
Waking up Jack quickly stretched his arms above his head, sighing at the sound of his shoulders popping because it felt so good. With that done he got out of his bed and went over to his bag of food in hopes of finding something, anything for breakfast. But his hopes were quickly dashed when he looked in the bag and found a few half full water bottles. That’s what he gets for not going food shopping for the last week though.

With a huff of frustration after realizing that the hotel’s complimentary breakfast was over, he threw on some clothes and headed out the door to find a local grocery store; which thankfully was only about five minutes away.

Walking through the aisles he worked about finding food that would last him his stay in Baltimore so that he didn’t have to come here more than one and risk seeing people he once knew.

“Holy shit, either that’s just Jack Barakat or I’m seeing a ghost,” a voice said from behind Jack making him spin around and come face-to-face with one of the three people he really wished that he wouldn’t run into.

“No, it’s really me,” Jack said acting as though he wasn’t slowly dying on the inside.

“God, it’s so good to see you again,” Zack said as he came over and hugged the other boy.

“You too,” he lied.

“So when are you going to go see Alex?” he asked bluntly just wanting to see his best friend completely happy again.

“I’m not,” Jack said before turning in hopes of walking away and never having to see Zack again, along with the remainder of his time back home.

“But you have to. You have to come back and make him happy again,” Zack pleaded as he grabbed for Jack’s wrist.

“I’ve been out of his life for over five years. He should have been happy for all those years,” Jack said seriously. “I wouldn’t want to come back into his life and make him sad.”

“What are you talking about? He’s been miserable these last few years. He’d only be happy again if you came back,” Zack said hoping Jack would understand how true his words were. “Please, just go see him.”

“I can’t. He needs to move on,” Jack said before walking away quickly before Zack could say anymore. He didn’t need to remember the boy he left behind. He left Alex behind to help him, he knew that Alex was probably hurting in the beginning, but he would stop hurting soon enough.

After grabbing a few more things he would need while trying his hardest to avoid another run in with Zack, Jack made his way up to the check lanes and got in what appeared to be the shortest line.

Once he saw that there was room on the belt, he slowly started putting his groceries up, thanking god that he would be out of here soon and not have to worry about running into Zack anymore. For the time that Jack knew Zack, he was a creature of habit, so unless he changed drastically in the last five years, Jack already knew all the local hangouts that he should avoid on his trip.

“Did you find everything alright today?” a voice asked making Jack’s head snap up and eyes go wide.

“Alex,” he whispered making said cashiers head snap up and look at him.

“Jack,” Alex said with a watery smile, hardly believing that Jack was actually back in town, standing right in front of him.

“I didn’t know you worked here,” Jack said glancing behind himself and fist pumping on the inside when he saw there was no one behind him to witness their little reunion.

“It beats having to work with my cousins,” Alex said with a shrug. “Plus, they pay better here.”

“Well… that’s good,” he muttered not really knowing what to say as Alex continued scanning his groceries.

“Yeah…,” Alex said letting the awkward silence over take them. “So what are you doing back here?”

“I have a job in town. I guess there’s a new local band and the magazine wants me to do a photo shoot with them before they get interviewed in a few days.”

“So you’re still doing photography then,” Alex said with a smile. “You always took the best pictures. I still have that one you took of the sunset on the beach hanging up in my room.”

“You always loved sunsets,” Jack said with a laugh.

“No, I always loved the pictures you took of sunset,” he corrected as he finished ringing up the last of Jack’s groceries. “It’ll be $105.93.”

Not knowing what exactly to say, Jack just reached into his pocket and pulled out a twenty and hundred dollar bill and handed them over to Alex and then waited patiently for his change.

“So how long are you going to be in town?” Alex asked as he counted out his change.

“Hopefully no more than two weeks,” he said, not failing to miss the way Alex’s smile dropped.

“Oh, well I hope I get to see you again before you leave,” he said with a fake half a smile as he handed Jack his change.

“Yeah, maybe,” Jack said before grabbing his bags and leaving while making a mental note not to come back to this grocery store if he needed anything else.
~*~*~*~
“You’ll never guess who I saw today,” Zack said excitedly as he walked into Rian and Alex’s house later that night.

“Now’s not really the time,” Rian said as he looked up from the couch where Alex was crying into his shoulder.

“What happened?” he asked coming over to sit on Alex’s other side.

“I saw him today and he didn’t even care. He just wants to get out of here as soon as he can,” Alex cried crawling into Zack’s lap.

“You saw Jack,” he said not even needing to see Alex nod to know it was true.

“How’d you know?” Rian asked as he reached over and rubbed Alex’s back.

“Because after dropping Alex off at work I decided to do some shopping and I ran into Jack.”

“Did he ask you about me?” he asked in hopes that Jack was just playing it cool around Alex, but secretly missed Alex just as much as he missed him.

“Sorry sweetie, he didn’t,” Zack said hating the way Alex’s face caved when he answered.

“Why doesn’t he care?” he cried soaking Zack’s shirt with his tears.

“I’m sure he does care, he’s just too scared.”

“I just want him back.”

“We know. Trust us we know,” Rian said as he continued to rub his friends back in hopes of comforting him.
~*~*~*~
Getting back to the hotel room Jack carried in his grocery bags and worked on putting the refrigerated stuff into the mini-fridge in the room, thankful that all the food fit in there. It may have been a tight squeeze, but it fit.

Once he was sure that everything else was neatly put away he called his co-worker, Matt Flyzik who was in charge of the interview to see when he could photograph the band.

“Hey Flyzik, hope I didn’t wake you,” he said noting that it was a little after ten and Matt being the big parties he was usually slept until noon.

“Normally I would be furious, but since this is the first time in months that you’ve called me, I’ll forgive you Barakat,” he said before yawning. “But only this time.”

“Got ya,” Jack laughed.

“So why are you calling me at this ungodly hour anyways?” he asked sounding a bit more awake now.

“I was hoping that you set up a time for me to photograph that new band.”

“Yeah, let me just boot up my computer real quick since the schedules on there.”

“Sounds good,” Jack said as he laid back on his bed. “So how have you been?”

“Pretty good,” Matt said as Jack could tell that he was smiling brightly. “I finally asked Lindsey to marry me and she said yes.”

“Really? She agreed to marry your lazy ass,” he laughed.

“First of all I’m not lazy; I’m just not well motivated all the time. And yes, she agreed because she loves me as much as I love her.”

“I’m really happy for you dude,” Jack said with a smile.

“Good, because I was thinking of having you as my best man.”

“I’d be honored.”

“You realize that agreeing to it means you have to come back here to Baltimore at the time of the wedding, right?” Flyzik asked through a laugh.

“I didn’t really think about that. But I guess for you I can make the exception.”

“Good, because it wouldn’t be the same without you there.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now what time’s the photo shoot?” he asked.

“Tomorrow at nine pm.”

“Sounds good,” Jack said as he wrote it down on a piece of paper nearby. “Want to go get drinks afterwards?”

“What time are you thinking,” Flyzik asked.

“Maybe eleven or eleven thirty.”

“I’ll be there. Just text me the place and I’ll meet you there.”

“Alright, see you later,” Jack said before hanging up and trying to figure out what to do with his day.
~*~*~*~
The next day at nine o’clock sharp, Jack was pulling up to the venue that they band would be performing at the following night. With his camera in hand and an extra battery in his bag he made his way inside and found the four band members laughing on the stage.

If you asked him who he was photographing he’d tell you a band, it’s not like he would take the time to learn that their name was This Century.

After introducing himself to their manager he pulled out his camera and started taking his pictures. The first few pictures he got were candid shots so while the guys were just being themselves, he was snapping away.

Twenty minutes later he was telling them how to pose and what not. With about forty individual shots of each person and about two hundred group shots he called it a day. Everything was going great according to Jack. He had successfully avoided Alex for the last two days and was now getting a drink with one of his best friends.

Once he was done he told the band he’s see them again in a day when Matt would be interviewing them and he would be taking even more pictures of them as they answered questions.

Walking out of the studio he pulled out his phone texting Matt the time and place in which he wanted them to get drink.
~*~*~*~
"So what about Alex?" Flyzik suddenly asked making Jack stop partially though bringing his glass to his lips.

"What about him?" he asked as he set the glass back down; afraid that his tight grip might break it.

"Well aren't you going to go see him?"

"Why should I?"

"Because even though you won't admit it you secretly miss him as much as he misses you," Flyzik said with a small shrug.

"You're wrong. I don't miss him at all," Jack said lying to himself.

"Jack, when we first became friends I'd believe stupid lies like that but I'm your best fucking friend. Stop lying to me and stop lying to yourself. Go back to Alex. I know your family’s death just about killed you, but I think leaving Alex behind while you dealt with everything killed you more. I have yet to figure out why you've taken five years to come back here."

"I didn't want to ever come back," Jack cut in.

"I totally believe that one, but I know that you still regret not bringing Alex with you," he said with a small sad smile.

"That's where you’re wrong. I didn't want Alex. He's part of the reason my whole families dead. I don't want that kind of reminder to hang around me."

"How could you say that Jack?"

"Because it's true," he shouted gaining more attention from the other bar patrons then he would of liked.

Hoping they would get back to their drinking soon Flyzik looked around the room with a smile and waved at the people, sighing in relief when they started turning their attention back to the Budweiser bottle in front of them.

"How in the world could you blame Alex for your family?" Flyzik asked having never really learned the details that surrounded Jack's family and their death.

"Because I should have been in that car too; I should have died just like the rest of them," Jack cried not caring who would see. He would be back on the road in a few days and would never have to see these people ever again.

“Jack, first of all you should be happy to be alive. Second of all, how is that Alex’s fault? He wasn’t driving the other car.”

“He may not have been driving the car, but he made them late. If they had just left on time they wouldn’t have been there at that time,” he said saying the one thing he’d been thinking for way too many years.

“Jack, you don’t know that. Maybe it was their time to go. For all we know if they had stayed home that night, it would have happened the next.”

“Don’t give me that whole crap about God’s plan and what’s meant to happen will. They shouldn’t have died, and if you seriously believe that crap then I should have at least gone with them,” he said before wiping away a few stray tears that were falling from his eyes.

“What about Alex? He needed you here.”

“He’s been doing just fine without me for these past few years,” Jack said as though that were actually true.

“Stop lying to yourself. You know; you know that he has been slowly falling apart for the last five years without you. I still don’t understand how you could just up and leave on night.”

“Because I had too, it was too painful to be here, and it was way too painful to see Alex all the time.”

“Jack, whatever Alex did to make them run late; I don’t think it was intentional. Plus I’m almost positive he would have helped you get over their death,” Flyzik said being all sentimental for the first time in a while; except when he proposed of course.

“I know, but I can’t help but blame him for their death. If he hadn’t spent twenty minutes persuading my mom to let me stay home from my grandma’s I not only would have been them, but hopefully they’d still be alive.”

“I don’t think you ever told me this story… so why did Alex fight so hard with your mom to get you to stay home?”

“It was our four year anniversary. He wanted to take me somewhere nice to celebrate,” Jack said smiling at the memory. “We actually had a really great time… up until I got the call about the accident.”

“What did you guys do?”

“I took him to the beach for a nice candle lit dinner I had set up,” Alex said as he sat down next to Jack, scaring both boys slightly. “Then we did some things that could get you arrested for nudity and inappropriate behavior; thankfully it was eight o’clock at night and no one was on the beach,” he said with a wink making Matt wrinkle his nose and wish the mental image he now had would go away.

“What are you doing here?” Jack asked looking over at him.

“I happened to be walking past your guy’s table and heard my name, so I hung around a minute to realize that you were indeed talking about me and not some other Alex,” he said making Jack smile slightly. When they used to be together and Alex heard someone say his name he would hang around them for a moment or two, just to make sure they weren’t talking about him.

“Are you here by yourself?” he asked looking around hoping to see some of his friends with him.

“Yeah, Rian and Zack are right over there,” he said pointing towards the bar where the two boys were indeed sitting; Rian’s arm around some girl Jack had never met.

“Why don’t you go back over there with them?”

“You’re lucky I can tell when I’m not wanted,” Alex said before getting up and joining his friends once again.

“Good job, send him away just so you can stare aimlessly after him,” Matt muttered so quietly that Jack almost missed it before taking a sip of his drink.
~*~*~*~
An hour later and Jack, who thought he would be totally calm by now, was pissed off and ready to punch the red head guy he was staring, or more accurately glaring at. Why Alex thought it was okay to dance so provocatively with another guy while Jack was across the bar, Jack would never know.

“Dude, you said so yourself that he’s not your boyfriend, and that you don’t miss him so stop trying to will that man dead,” Matt said as he walked over to their table and set another two beers down on the table.

“He knows I’m right across the bar. Why would he do something like that?” Jack asked as he turned back around to face his friend.

“I don’t know. Maybe he’s trying to make you jealous so that you’ll admit your feelings for him that you’ve been burying for the last five years,” he said with a shrug before taking a swig of his beer.

“I’m not jealous,” Jack muttered before turning around and grabbing his beer.

“Sure you’re not.”
~*~*~*~
“Hell no, that is not happening,” Jack said before jumping out of his seat and storming over to where Alex and his red haired friend were putting on their coats.

“Told you it would work,” Flyzik said with a smile as he, Zack, Rian and Cassadee watched Jack chase after Alex.

“I still can’t believe Alex agreed to that,” Rian said with a shake of his head. “He’s barely been with one guy since Jack left.”

“It was probably because of all the shots you gave him,” Zack laughed before turning back to the bar and flagging down the bartender to order one last drink for the night.
~*~*~*~
“What do you think you’re doing?” Jack asked grabbing Alex’s wrist and pulling him back slightly from the man he was walking with.

“I think I’m going to go home and have a good time,” Alex said glaring slightly at Jack.

“Sorry buddy, but he’s with me,” he said to the red head before shooing him away.

“Why would you do that?”

“Because there is no way in hell I’m letting you hop into bed with some random stranger you just met in a bar.”

“I wanted to have some fun. Why did you have to ruin that?” Alex said angrier that he should have been because of the alcohol in his system.

“So that you don’t do something stupid.”

“Why the hell would you care?”

“Come on, I’m taking you home,” Jack said before grabbing Alex’s arm and pulling him towards his house.

Ten minutes later and Alex was stumbling behind Jack on the way into the house and up to his bedroom. Jack having not forgotten the layout of the house, let alone Alex’s room, quickly led them up to the room. Once inside he started digging through the drawers and throwing random articles of clothing at Alex for him to chance into for bed.

“Now get into bed and go to sleep,” Jack said a few minutes later when he turned around and saw Alex changed into his pajamas, sitting on his bed staring at the wall ahead of him.

“I don’t want to.”

“I don’t really care what you want,” Jack said as he pulled back the covers and forced Alex’s legs under them. “Now get some sleep.”

“Wait,” Alex said as he reached out and grabbed Jack’s wrist. “I don’t want to be alone.”

“Alex.”

“Just lay with me. That’s all I’m asking,” he said giving Jack those puppy dog eyes he could never say no to.

“Fine, but no funny business,” Jack said waiting for Alex’s confirming nod before going back over to the dresser and finding some of Alex’s clothes for him to wear himself.
~*~*~*~
“So how did last night go?” Rian asked the next morning as Alex walked into the kitchen.

“Well I don’t remember too much, but I did wake up to him in my bed,” Alex said with a smile.

“That’s something that hasn’t happened in forever,” Rian teased.

“I know, don’t remind me. At least he’s there now.”

“Yeah, but for how long?”

“Don’t ruin my good mood Dawson,” Alex said shooting a glare at his best friend before going over to the cupboards and grabbing some cereal out of it.

“Sorry, just speaking the truth.”

“Looks like it’s going to rain,” Alex said looking out the window hoping to get Rian off the topic of Jack leaving him again.

“Whether man said that there’s a 75% chance of rain, now stop trying to change the subject.”

“I’m going to go eat breakfast in my room. Talk to you later,” Alex said before grabbing his cereal, two bowls, two spoons, a carton of milk and fleeing up to his room where Jack was still sleeping.
~*~*~*~
“Morning sleepy head,” Alex said with a smile as he walked into his bedroom as saw Jack sitting up rubbing at his eyes.

“Morning,” Jack said, making Alex smile because he was once again hearing how groggy Jack’s voice sounded in the mornings; something Alex absolutely loved.

“I got us breakfast,” he said as he set the bowls down on the bedside table followed by the milk.

“You didn’t have too,” Jack said as he started getting out of the bed to get his pile of clothes out of the corner where he put them the night before.

“I feel like you deserve it for staying with me.”

“Alex."

“I insist. There’s no room for arguments,” he said as he started pouring out two bowls of cereal and handing one to Jack.

“Fine, but once I’m done, I’m gone,” Jack said as he sat down and poured some milk on top of the Cocoa Puffs Alex had gotten them.

“That’s all I ask,” Alex smiled.

“Good, cause that’s all you’re getting,” Jack muttered before shoveling cereal into his mouth.

Sitting in silence with a question on the tip of his tongue, the same question that been on his mind for the last five years, he started itching at his arm as if that would make the question, and slight awkwardness filling the room go away.

“Just ask me Alex,” Jack said through a mouthful of cereal.

“You’ll get mad.”

“Just ask me before you scratch your arm open,” Jack said as he reached over and pulled Alex’s hand away from his arm.

“Why did you leave without me?”

“I really don’t want to talk about this right now; or ever,” Jack said as he put his mostly empty cereal bowl on the bedside table.

“Well I don’t really care, because I need to know why.”

“I better get going,” Jack said before jumping up from his seat and heading straight towards the bedroom door, completely forgetting about his clothes that lay in the corner.

“Leaving so soon,” Rian said as Jack walked through the kitchen on his way out.

“Definitely,” he said as he pushed his way past Zack who was making his way into the room.

“Jack Barakat, don’t you dare walk away from me,” Alex yelled after him as he too made his way through the kitchen and towards the front door.

“Alexander Gaskarth, don’t you dare tell me what to do,” he yelled back mimicking Alex’s tone of voice.

“Jack, just wait for a minute,” Alex said as he pulled the front door shut behind him and started down the porch towards where Jack was halfway down their walk.

“Why?”

“Because I need to know.”

“Alex, please just leave me alone,” Jack said through tears as he turned away from Alex and started to walk away.

“No, you owe me an explanation Jack. You can’t just leave me for five years with no explanation. I need to know what I did wrong; what I did to make you leave me,” he said, his voice turning towards pleading at the end of his rant.

“That’s just it Alex, you didn’t do anything wrong. I don’t know why I left, I just had too,” Jack yelled as he spun around to face the older man.

“You never even officially broke up with me,” Alex said as he looked down at the ground as tears started pooling in his eyes. “I bet you don’t even care, but I haven’t been able to go out with, let alone kiss another man since you left, because since we never broke up, people would say we’re still together and I felt like I was cheating on you,” he explained as he sniffled and wiped his nose. “Pretty pathetic, I know.”

“Alex, we’re over,” he said in hopes of giving Alex that ability to start moving on.

“I don’t want us to be over,” he said as he looked up at Jack through his bangs. “I just want you to come back home so we can try and fix things.”

“Alex, I can’t stay here, there are too many bad memories,” he said with a shake of his head.

“Then I’ll go with you,” he said excitedly.

“No way; I am not letting you give up your life for me. You are staying here, we’re breaking up, and you’re going to start moving on,” Jack said before walking away and leaving a crying Alex standing in the rain.
~*~*~*~
Twenty minutes later found Jack in his car heading out of the city, with plans of emailing his boss his work partial work in the next city he stopped in, while Alex was still standing in the same spot crying.

“Alex, come inside before you get sick,” Cassadee said as she walked outside and pulled on Alex’s loose fitting hoddie sleeve.

“Doesn’t matter,” he sniffled as he followed her inside.

“He doesn’t deserve you,” she said hoping that the phrase she had been told after every breakup in high school would help Alex now.

“That’s where you’re wrong. It was always me that didn’t deserve him. I was so lucky that someone like him wanted to be with someone as pathetic as me.”

“Alex, you are not pathetic, don’t ever think that,” Rian said as he came over and pulled his friend into a hug.

“If I’m not pathetic then why doesn’t he love me?” he asked looking up at Rian through his tears.

“He does love you, he’s just scared,” he said with a sad smile as he pushed Alex’s wet bangs out of his face.

“How can you be so sure?”

“Because, he looks at you the same way I look at Cass.”

“I just want him to want me,” Alex said curling tighter into his friend, and easily accepting it when Cassadee curled up into his side to offer him more comfort.

“Don’t worry, he’ll be back for you once he realizes what am amazing guy he left behind,” Cassadee said with a smile as she looked up at him.

“Cass is right, he’ll be back sooner or later,” Rian said as he grabbed the TV remote in hopes of them find something to watch to get their minds off of Jack leaving again.

“I hope its sooner,” Alex mumbled bitterly. “Five years was just too long.”

Smiling down sadly at Alex, Rian looked over at Cassadee and saw that she was doing the same thing.
~*~*~*~
Halfway to California, and his next job, Jack decided that it was finally time to stop and rest. Pulling off the highway he located the closest hotel and pulled in hoping that they would have a vacancy, which they most likely did with how empty the parking lot was.

Walking inside Jack headed towards the desk and stopped dead in his tracks when he saw the hotel clerk lean over the desk and kiss the guy on the other side; most likely her boyfriend. He couldn’t help the small smile that graced his face at the memories that hit him.

“Jack what are you doing? You can’t be back here,” Alex said with a laugh as he saw his boyfriend, who was trying to act like a spy sneak behind the counter.

“If you stop talking no one will have to know I was here,” Jack said as he finally made it and crouched down under the desk near where Alex was sitting.

“Okay, but why are you here?” Alex asked smiling down at Jack as he linked their fingers together and squeezed Jack’s hand.

“I haven’t seen my boyfriend in almost three days, so I took it upon myself to come see him,” he said with a mischievous grin.

“Whatever, just be quiet, because there’s some customers coming in,” he said as he spotted a couple, who were obviously drunk stumble into the hotel. He’d seen many people like this come in at night and it was always for the same reason; they were drunk and horny, and this was the closest hotel to the town’s bars.

“Whatever you say,” Jack said with a smirk as he moved and decided to put his plan into action, or payback as others would call it.

“Hello and welcome to the Holloway Inn. How can I help you guys?” Alex asked with a fake smile as the drunken couple stumbled up to the counter.

“One room with a king bed,” the man answered as his female companion laughed and Jack unzipped Alex’s pants; which Alex had to ignore or else he’d look like a crazy person glaring at the floor.

“Alright, that will be…seventy-five dollars a night,” Alex said after typing a few things into the computer and giving Jack a warning look that he ignored.

As the man was talking to the woman making sure that it was okay, Jack was working on pulling Alex’s dick out of his boxers, which was slightly difficult since Alex was sitting down and not doing anything to help Jack.

“That should be good,” the man said just as Jack put his mouth around Alex’s dick, making him moan slightly. “Are you okay?” the man asked looking at him like he was crazy.

“Yeah, perfectly fine,” he said with a smile as he slipped one of his hands into Jack’s hair, having a hard time believing that his boyfriend would actually do something like this. “I’ll just need a credit card and some ID,” he said before biting his lip to keep from moaning as Jack took him further into his mouth.

“Alright, here you go,” the man said handing it over and smiling over at his partner for the night.

As Alex worked on typing in the man’s information and getting him a hotel room, Jack worked on pleasuring him more. Deciding that he hadn’t made Alex uncomfortable enough yet, Jack pulled his mouth off of Alex and blew on the tip of his dick making Alex moan out, kind of loudly, and by the blush that was creeping up his neck, Jack was willing to guess that the two people in front of him were giving him strange looks.

Satisfied with the blush on his boyfriends face, Jack took Alex back in his mouth and used his tongue to bring his boyfriend more pleasure. While his tongue dipped into Alex’s slit, cleaning up the pre-cum, his hand was massaging Alex’s thighs, something he knew that Alex absolutely loved.

“Here are you c-cards bac-k,” Alex said trying is best to remain professional as he got closer and closer to his release. “You’ll be in room… 6...613,” he said handing over the key card before biting his lip, practically making it bleed.

“Thanks,” the man said giving Alex a funny look before hurrying his companion into the elevator and up to the sixth floor so that they could go do something similar to what Jack was doing to Alex.

“Fuck,” Alex muttered once he was sure that the lobby was cleared out and threaded both hand into Jack’s hair pulling him closer and making him take more of Alex into his mouth as Alex started to cum.

Jack, having always enjoyed giving Alex blow jobs, happily swallowed everything Alex had to offer and kept sucking him off throughout his high. Once he was sure that Alex was done, he pulled off of the older boy and smiled up at him, watching as he slowly tried to regulate his breathing once again.

“What was that for?” Alex panted a few minutes later when his breathing started getting back to normal.

“Remember the other night when I went to dinner with my grandparents and you kept texting me?” Jack asked as he rested his head on Alex’s knee.

“Yeah,” Alex said with a smirk as he pushed some of Jack’s bangs out of his eyes.

“This is payback for sexting me and making me cum at the same table as my grandma,” Jack said with a lopsided grin as he turned his head slightly and kissed Alex’s wrist.

“If this is what you consider payback, I’m going to have to send you more dirty messages when you’re with your grandparents,” he said with a smirk as he leaned down and kissed his boyfriend.

“Please don’t,” Jack said as they broke away.

“Will you still do things like this if I don’t?”

“Yea, it will be like your rewards, rather than payback,” Jack said before kissing him again.

“Sounds perfect,” Alex said against Jack’s lips before tackling him to the ground and kissing him.

“Can I help you sir?” the clerk asked pulling Jack out of his memories.

“No, I’m good,” he said with a smile before walking out of the hotel and back into his car.
~*~*~*~
After sixteen hours of what was probably the worlds unsafest driving ever Jack arrived, surprisingly safely at his final destination, smiling up at the sign as he made his way inside.

Looking at the counter and being surprised at just who was there, Jack decided to slip back into his adolescent ways. Once he was sure the coast was clear he snuck behind the counter and rested his chin on the knee of the hotel clerk and smiled up at him. He couldn’t help but smile just that little bit wider when he felt the man reach down and start playing with his hair as he finished up with the man checking in at the counter.

“What are you doing here?” Alex asked slightly surprised as he looked down at Jack’s smiling face.

“I could ask you the same thing. I thought you quit.”

“I did; but Gary got sick and they were having troubled with the hotel and I was always taught to help out family, so here I am helping them out,” he said with a shrug.

“Well then I’m glad you decided to help out today.”

“What are you even doing here?” Alex asked looking down at him and desperately wanting answers as to why the man who broke up with him a little over a day ago is back here and staring up at him.

“Since it was late, and I was tired I was going to get a hotel room so that I could talk to you in the morning,” he explained.

“Oh, and what is there for us to talk about, because last I knew we were over,” Alex said a little more than bitterly, as he turned his head and looked away from Jack.

“I know and that’s what I wanted to talk to you about,” Jack said with a hopeful gleam in his eyes as he reached up and turned Alex’s face back to looking at his.

“Then talk,” Alex said as he removed his hand from Jack’s hair and finally looked down at him on his own free will. It wasn’t until then that he had even noticed where his hands were. Playing with Jack’s hair was just a habit that he couldn’t help.

“Well for starters, I was stupid. I never should have just up and left you all those years ago. I should have stayed here and talked to you. Maybe you could have helped me deal with everything. You could have made me alright again. Maybe I wouldn’t have had to scower the country looking for happiness. Maybe we would have been married by now, just like we were planning. Maybe we would have adopted a kid or two just like you always wanted. But the biggest maybe of all is maybe; no actually definitely we would have been together and happy for the last five years. All-in-all Alex what I’m trying to say is I’m sorry for being gone, I’m sorry for leaving you, I’m sorry from breaking up with you, and if you’ll still have me I would love to be considered your boyfriend again. And I would love to be part of each other’s life, and if your offer still stands I would love to have you out on the road with me. Or if you don’t want to travel I’ll quit and stay here with you. I’m sure I could find a job at a mini-mart or something near here,” Jack said with a smile while Alex sat there dumbfounded.

After all these years he was finally hearing the words he’d been begging to hear since Jack left.

Instead of answering Jack with words, Alex answered most of his questions by jumping out of his seat and tackling Jack to the ground before kissing him, much like he had done about seven years ago when Jack had come to work to ‘punish’ him.

“So can I call you mine again?” Jack asked as they broke away and he propped himself up on his elbows.

“Yes, you dummy,” Alex said with a laugh as he shook his head at Jack. “I thought the kiss would have answered that one.”

“You’re right; it should have been obvious,” jack said before grabbing the back of his head and pulling him into another kiss.

“How risky are you willing to get?” Alex asked suddenly breaking their kiss and leaning his forehead against Jacks.

“Well that depends, what are you suggesting?” Jack asked with a raised eyebrow, curious as to what ideas were churning in Alex’s mind.

“What’s the one thing we never tried to get away with in all the time I worked here?” Alex asked with a smirk.

“You can’t be serious?” Jack asked while looking up at Alex like he had grown two extra heads.

“Oh, but I am; I’m more serious than I have ever been Jacky,” Alex said as he reached down and started taking off Jack’s belt.

“Alex, no,” Jack said sternly as he pushed Alex’s hands away.

“I thought you wanted me again,” Alex said looking like a wounded puppy as he started down at his hands that Jack had just pushed into his lap.

“I do baby, so so much. This is just so risky, and I don’t want you getting in trouble with your family. Plus I was thinking that our first time in over five years would be special, not a quick fuck behind the counter of a hotel,” Jack said as he reached up and rubbed Alex’s cheek.

“I just wanted some kind of proof that this was real,” Alex said looking at Jack through his bangs.

“Baby, I’m right here. Feel this?” he asked putting Alex’s hand to his heart. “There’s proof that I’m here.”

“But I want more,” he said sadly.

“Baby-.”

“Jack please?” Alex asked with pleading eyes.

“Only if you let me romance you next time with way too many rose petals, a nice bottle of wine, and telling you that you are beautiful every five seconds,” Jack said playing with Alex’s fingers as he smiled up at him.

“Deal,” Alex said with a smile before he attacked Jack with kissed making the younger man’s arms give out and wrap around Alex’s hips holding him close, not wanting to ever let him go again.
~*~*~*~
“That was…”

“Amazing,” Alex said with a smile as he looked up at Jack from his place on the other man’s chest. “Aren’t you glad we did this now?”

“Very,” Jack said with a smile before kissing Alex’s forehead and pulling him even closer.

“Excuse me, is there anyone down here,” a voice said from the other side of the counter gaining the boys attention.

“Fuck,” Jack muttered as Alex moved to pull on his shirt. “I told you this was a bad idea,” he glared at Alex as he reached over and started pulling his boxers on.

“Trust me,” Alex said with a wink and a smile before quickly pulling on his own boxers before standing up, thankful for the tall counter that blocked his bottom half from the man’s view. “Can I help you with anything?”

“Umm, yes; I already tried calling down here but no one answered,” he started. “I was wondering if it was possible to get a few more towels in my room.”

“Of course,” Alex said with a wide smile. “Just give me your room number and I’ll have them sent right up.”

“Room 615, and thank you young man,” he said before turning and heading back up to his room.

After calling his cousin who was in charge of housekeeping for the night and asking her to bring the guest his towels, Alex dropped down onto Jack’s lap.

“Well that was a close one,” he said with a sigh. “But totally worth it,” he smiled before kissing Jack again and cuddling into his chest once again.

“As long as I’m with you, it’s worth it,” Jack said as he pulled Alex even closer to himself; if that was even possible.

“Glad you think that, because I think the same way.”