Login with:








Your info will not be visible on the site. After logging in for the first time you'll be able to choose your display name.

Without the Love


You didn’t love her. You just didn’t want to be alone. Or maybe, maybe she was just good for your ego. Or, or maybe she made you feel better about your miserable life, but you didn’t love her. Because you don’t destroy people you love. –Grey’s Anatomy

Alex met Macaria before over a decade ago…when All Time Low was preforming in basements and local events, selling home screened t-shirts out of the back of an old mini van. On a rainy night in a pizzeria in Baltimore they exchanged their first words and first fleeting smiles.

Alex and Macaria were together for nearly seven years...a thing their whole circle of friends had expected. On a windy day in the middle of Towson they shared their first kiss and first real love.

Alex dumped Macaria over four years ago...something so terrible it caused the band to shatter and friendships to crumble. On a sunny day in a crowded venue in Philadelphia they shared their last words.
That night she lost herself…and he was just fine.

Or was he?

He should've been right. He's the one who ended it.

But does that matter?


Alex Gaskarth

Alex Gaskarth

Dangerously near 31, still a wreck

Jack Barakat

Jack Barakat

30 years young, entrepreneur, musician, faithful best friend ‘til the end

Macaria Rose Reacheara

Macaria Rose Reacheara

27 years old, still trying to figure her life out

Matt Flyzik

Matt Flyzik

33 years old, will be popping in and out (as old friends do)

Noelle Merrick

Noelle Merrick

29 years old, mother, wife, publicist

Rian Dawson

Rian Dawson

Also nearing 31, also missing his better half

Zack Merrick (and his son Bastille)

Zack Merrick (and his son Bastille)

30 year old husband and father and music teacher - 1 year old heart throb


  1. Sorry for the Times

    Macaria | January 2nd, 2014

  2. Days Spent Without Her

    Alex | August 29th, 2018

  3. Not a Lost Girl

    Macaria | September 6th, 2018

  4. I Put a Spell on You

    An Interlude| Macaria| October 28th, 2007

  5. You Don't Do It For Me Anymore p. 1.

    Macaria | September 7th, 2018

  6. You Don't Do It For Me Anymore pt. 2

    Alex| September 7th, 2018

  7. And Life Was Complete

    An Interlude | January 6th, 2008


Wowwww... I am so late, but I am here. I'm so sorry for the delay in commenting!
I haven't really gotten on here as much lately. Life stuff. :/ And just, trying not to be so absorbed with the internet lately. I've gotten on social media a tad but I'm trying to take more breaks from it.
But I wanted to take some time to sit down on here and catch up with what I've missed, so here I am. :)
Cute interlude. <3 Their first kiss, aw. A bit scandalous, though, with the age gap, but at least they didn't rush into things. It's sweet how he was so confident in being with her, but then it changed. :( What happened?
I'm hoping following this comment I don't take forever to lead feedback again. Sorry about that, and looking at the comments, I take it you've probably waited since no one else has left feedback yet. :/ But I'll be here as much as I can be.
Oh, and in response to your author's note: Simple Creatures! YAAASSS, am I right? :D
Interested in seeing more. :)

Nanook Nanook

OMG, you leave me a shout-out and I take FOREVER to comment again. I'm so grateful for it though. *sobbing emoji* :'( I feel so bad, I'm sorry girl for taking so long.
But great job with this second part. Ooof, I hope Alex is okay, ugh; I hate when someone falls and that hit on head thing is described. XD lol, that's so random, but I cringed.
Hmm... Alex is still feeling things. As well he should. Like anyone else reading, the biggest question is why did he end things? Especially since it seems like he regrets it. Sigh. My prediction is fear of commitment, but it would be interesting to see if something else is factored in. Like, maybe someone said something to him, and that made him think about their relationship (stupidly, but, still ponder it). Like, I could see something like that happening and that making him make a split-second decision and thus, the regret now and realizing he made a huge mistake.
To answer your question on the conversation, I mean... it was civilized? Didn't seem too bad, but they didn't really say much, so maybe that factor is saying something. Obviously, Jack doesn't hate him as much as Macaria does, since he's taking the time to talk to him. Or well, now, anyway, maybe it was different after things initially happened.
Anyway, great job with the update! I love that you love Demi too! :D She is my fav. :D Next to Cassadee Pope (which, is probably sacrilegious at this point with also loving ATL/being in the ATL fandom, but, you know, who cares XD). I'm also happy that Demi's out of rehab and just got a Grammy nom with Christina like OMG. :')
Anyway, lol, back on topic: excited to see what you have next in store! Hopefully I won't take as long to comment again, sigh. I've just been dealing with stuff lately, so sorry if it does. But I'll try my best to get on here sooner. <3

Nanook Nanook

Yay, an update! Hmm... so, I don't think you got to updating again as soon as you expected, assuming I'm thinking right on the timeline when you posted this, lol. But that's okay, because I'm only just now catching up. XD So sorry girl. :/
Anyway, great job with the update! Love how you used Demi's song as inspiration; she is my fav. :D And the song is definitely accurate in this story.
Great depiction when describing the new bar/restaurant. I can definitely visualize how it looks, so I wanted to commend that because sometimes writers often struggle with describing the scene in fan fics. So awesome job with describing. :)
I'm not sure if this is a mistake, but something that I reread that had me wondering, lol:
He was tracing the rim with long fingers, the shading of a large tattoo on his hand visible as he finger swiped.
"he finger swiped" or "his finger swiped"? Because reading it again, "he finger swiped" could make sense, reading it in a present tense sort of way. Sounded a bit awkward though when I first read it. But it may have been intentional, not sure. In which case, completely disregard this note if it was lol.
It makes me sad that she broke down when she wanted to stay strong. :( Aw.
I'm not mad at Jack for not telling her; it's very clear why he didn't, with just what we know from the backstory. I don't blame him. And then hearing her reaction definitely emphasizes siding with him more.
Great job with the update! Interested in hearing Alex's side of this, and more from Jack. :)
Also, that's awesome that you're doing NaNoWriMo. I did it one year when I was in high school, haven't since because it stressed me out too much trying to balance that and school. XD But now that I'm out of high school and college I may try it again one year. Definitely commend you for doing it while balancing college, 100x more stressful than trying it in high school I'm sure. But yeah, I understand being busy, so if it takes you a while between updates, I totally understand.

Nanook Nanook

Great job with the update! Short but to the point. Apologies for the delay in commenting; I've had a hectic time the past few weeks. This may happen occasionally, hopefully not all the time right after you update... but know I will always get around to commenting like I am now. :)
In response to your last comment:
Oh, gotcha. XD No worries, and you can totally change it to an a on the end, since it's your story. Like that part is up to you. I just wanted to check with that because I wasn't sure how accurate you were planning on being with names.
And oh, okay, I see you briefly covered him in this new update as well; was just wondering since I didn't know if he would maybe be a new love interest or something. But figured it would be explained at some point.
As for the new update, great job with it! :) I don't have much to comment on since it was just kind of a brief moment, but this part:
Macaria cursed, creatively, for a third time, as she struggled to close her yellow umbrella under the fabric eaves outside of Matthew’s Pizzeria, her older brother Derek and all the ways she was going to destroy him when she got home.
I think you maybe want to add "on her mind" after "Derek" or after "home." Or maybe I'm just not reading the sentence right? XD Hopefully this makes sense; it just seems like a piece is missing from this sentence for it to make sense lol. Maybe it's just my tired mind though, idk.
But anyway, I love how you made this Halloween-themed; it fit for when you posted it and now I feel so bad for taking so long to comment, sorry again! But loved reading this little snippet and excited to see more! :)

Nanook Nanook

If we’re being completely honest she’s Isobella and not Isobel it’s because I typed isobel and that I spelled her name wrong so I went back and changed it (thank you for catching it!)
Derek is Macarias older brother - that’s about all I can say about him for right now but he does play an integral part in the story.
The dynamic between Alex and his parents is going to be explored later on, as is the dynamic between Macaria and them. I wanted to emphasize just how badly Alex is screwing up though. So your reaction is reassuring that his mistakes are evident!
thank you as always for the read and you’re amazing attention to detail ❤️

RosesNWriters RosesNWriters