You're the Cherry I'm a Cigarette

I made the horrible mistake of going with Jack to make a few deliveries for his “job.” He tried to talk me out of going with him and have me wait for him to finish but I didn’t listen. I should have listened. The neighborhood we were in was like something out of a movie. Most of the stores were closed down with wooden planks and bars over the window. There were also so many homeless people on this side of town. More than I’ve ever seen near my grandparent’s neighborhood.

“You okay?” Jack asked and placed his hand on my thigh.

“Mhmm.” I gulped and nodded.

“I told you to stay home until I finished, but you’re too hardheaded.” He laughed. I would have laughed too if it weren’t true.

“I’ll listen next time.” I sighed.

“You’re so dramatic, there’s nothing to be afraid of. I’ve known these guys for a while. They’re weird, but nice.” He said as he pulled into an apartment complex. “You wanna come with me?” He asked, and I nodded.

I got out of the car with Jack and walked to his side, so I could be close by him. He went into his back seat and grabbed his backpack before closing and locking his door. I walked with him up a few stairs and we stopped at the first door on the left. There was loud music playing, but it was turned down and soon after the door was being opened.

“Barakat, what up man!” A tall scrawny man said as he opened the door for us.

“Hey Tyler.” Jack said causally. “This is my friend Alex.” He introduced me, and I waved.

“Any friend of Jack’s is a friend of mine. Get in here!” He exclaimed and step to the side to let us step in. Jack stepped in first and I quickly followed after him. He went to take a seat on the couch and I sat down with him. I looked on the glass coffee table to see thin white lines of powder spread out on it. I looked at Jack and he quietly chuckled and grabbed my hand and rubbed my knuckles with his thumb to tell me to relax.

“So how’s life been since I seen you a few weeks ago? Any major changes?” Tyler asked Jack. I watched as Tyler sat down on the recliner chair across from us and leaned down by the coffee table.

“Nah not much. I pretty much just get high, eat, sleep, and go to school.” Jack shrugged.

“That sounds boring as shit.” Tyler laughed and picked up a straw. He bent down and placed the straw to his nose and snorted a line of the coke. Then he rubbed his nose as he let out a groan. I tightened my grip on Jack’s hand and he sighed. “Man, your brother has the best shit. Good thing I called you when I did because this is the last of what I have.” He said pointing down to the three lines left on the table. “You guys wanna do a line?” He offered, and I let out a shaky laugh. This was unbelievable. I’ve never seen a real-life person do coke before, let alone been offered it.

“No we’re good, but thanks.” Jack answered for the both of us.

“Ah Barakat, you used to be so cool.” Tyler chuckled and turned towards me and pointed to Jack. “This guy used to snort more coke-“

“-Tyler.” Jack cut him off and he looked between us.

“Oh sorry man, you know how I got when I’m high.” He laughed and Jack just nodded. “I’m probably scaring the poor kid.” He gestured towards me.

“No no, I’m fine.” I quickly lied.

“You’ll have to get used to this shit since you’re dating a drug dealer.” He continued. I guess I would since this was part of Jack’s life.

“Yeah that’s true.” I nodded.

“I thought I heard more voices.” Someone said coming from a room in the back.

“I thought you weren’t here.” Jack told the man with pink hair under a baseball cap.

“Nah I was just cleaning this baby.” He pulled out a hand gun from his pants waist and I gasped. “I just got it from the pawn shop. I’ve been telling Tyler we needed one for protection around here.”

I’m pretty sure I had a death grip on Jack’s arm at this point.

“Josh put that away, you’re scaring Jack’s friend.” Tyler said, point to my pale white face.

“Oh shit sorry dude.” He apologized and put it back in his pants, but I couldn’t bring myself to speak I was so scared.

“How about we just get to why I care here.” Jack smiled and unzipped his backpack. Josh walked over and did a line of coke off the table before sitting in the recliner chair with Tyler while we waited. I was going to die if we didn’t get out of this house soon.

“Okay, here’s the usual.” Jack pulled out a big Ziplock bag full of weed and a lot of smaller bags full of cocaine. He handed them to Josh who then expected the bags.

“You are a lifesaver.” Tyler told him and Jack laughed.

“I’m literally the opposite.”

We waited while Josh pulled out a wad of money from his pockets and counted out the correct amount for Jack. I watched in amazement as he counted out four-hundred and eighty dollars in twenties just for drugs. He handed the money to Jack and he put the money in a wallet and in his backpack.

“Well it was nice seeing you two again, but we should get going.” Jack said as he stood up and I did the same.

“Yeah you’ll have to stop by some time so we can really hang out.” Josh said as he did a handshake with Jack.

“Yeah definitely.” Jack agreed as we walked to the door.

“It was nice meeting you, Alex.” Tyler told me.

“You too!” I partially lied.

Jack and I walked out the door and back down the stairs until we were back at his car. I took a deep breath once I was safely sitting in his car. Jack began laughing as he started the engine and I glared at him.

“What is so funny?” I asked.

“You are the most dramatic person I’ve ever met.” He chuckled.

“Dramatic?!? Jack he had a gun! He could have killed us and kept the money and the drugs!” I yelled at him.

“Josh wouldn’t do that.” He brushed it off. “Besides he knows Joe would slit his throat if he did anything to me.”

“That was just so stressful.” I groaned.

“I told you to stay home.” He taunted, and I rolled my eyes.

“As much as I hated it, I sort of like the adrenaline rush it gave me.” I said truthfully, and he raised an eyebrow at me.

“That’s not even the worse of what could happen. Joe’s friend Tony got stabbed one time during a drug deal gone bad.” He said and I frowned.

“I don’t want you to be a drug dealer anymore.” I whined.

“Oh hush, I only deal weed. No one’s going to kill me over that.” He shrugged.

“But you gave them cocaine?” I said, confused.

“Yeah Joe usually makes an exception for them to save himself a trip and because we’ve known them for forever. They used to be our neighbors.” He explained, and I nodded.

“Oh...and was it true what he said...that you used to um do it too?” I asked and he sighed.

“...It’s been a long time since I’ve done coke. I was curious, and I tried it and I kept doing it for a while but then I stopped once Joe caught wind of it. He threatened to beat my ass and kick me out of his house, so I had to stop.” He chuckled to himself.

“Did you like it?” I asked.

“It gave me a lot of energy, but the high only last like thirty minutes and it’s too expensive. I’d rather stick with weed.”

“Drugs are complicated.”

“Very.” He agreed. “Now where do you want to go? Are you hungry?”

“No. I’m not hungry after seeing my life flash before my eyes.” I joked, and he playfully rolled his eyes. “I just want to lay down.”

“Okay. My place it is.” He said and made a right turn.

Jack drove us to his house and I texted my grandma that I was going out to eat with a few a few friends. They thought that I made more friends at school which was a great excuse to get out of the house to see Jack. Maybe I should bring Kellin, Cass, and Lynn sometime to meet them so my grandparents wouldn’t become skeptical. Jack pulled into his driveway fifteen minutes later and we went inside. I wanted to lay down and relax with Jack after what we just experienced.

“Here.” Jack said to Joe and threw the money from the sales in his lap. We waited in the living room as Joe pulled the rubber band off of the money and counted it. Then he pulled out one hundred and fifty dollars and gave it to Jack.

“How’d it go?” Joe asked with a cigarette in his mouth.

“Eh fine, we didn’t stay too long. Josh scared the shit out of Alex when he showed us his new gun though.” Jack chuckled, and I lightly hit him on the stomach.

“Nobody’s going to fuck with you while you’re with Jack. They know I got his back if anything happens to him or his friends.” He said reassuringly, and I nodded.

“It’s just . . . I’ve never seen a gun in real life before.” I mumbled, and Joe laughed.

“Well don’t go looking under Jack’s bed.” He taunted and put his cigarette back in his mouth.

I looked up at Jack and he grabbed my hand to take me to his room. I really didn’t know what I’m getting myself into being with a drug dealer. Jack pulled me to his room without commenting on what Joe said about looking under his bed. I didn’t ask because he would have said something if he felt like he needed to. I kicked my shoes off and sat on Jack’s bed while he went into his closet and changed.

“Do you wanna watch a movie?” Jack asked from his closet.

“Yeah, just for background noise though.” I told him. I was planning on catching up on all my social media sites while I cuddled in Jack’s bed with him.

“Okay I’ll just find something on TV.” He walked out in basketball shorts and a T-shirt and pick up his remote. He had just turned the TV on when Joe called him into the living room.

Jack sighed and handed me the remote. “I’ll be back.” He told me.

I nodded and took the remote to surf through the channels. There was never anything good to watch on Saturdays. After a few more minutes of looking, I settled on Jaws. Jack still wasn’t back yet, I could slightly hear him and Joe talking in the living room. Their conversation didn’t sound serious, or like it was ending soon. I couldn’t stop myself from wanting to look under Jack’s bed. I just wanted to know exactly what Joe meant. I mean obviously there had to be a gun, but Joe made it sound as if there were a lot. I was curious and the only way to stop my curiosity would be to look. I got off of Jack’s bed and stood next to the door to see if Jack was coming back.

“I’ve only had like four people ask me if I sold those at school, but new people may be willing to try it.” I could hear Jack say. Joe began talking more so I knew I had a little bit of time.

I ran over to Jack’s bed and got on my knees. I was first greeted with a few pair of shoes Jack put under here. I moved a few boxes and found a silver metal case. Is that what a gun case looked like? There were three similar cases under the bed by it. I pulled one out and looked behind me to make sure Jack wasn’t back yet. He wasn’t so I continued and pulled the latch on the case. I opened it and my suspicions were correct, there was a hand gun in the case with extra bullets. Did that mean the other three were also filled with guns?? Why did he need so many? I mean I get he’s a drug dealer and you have to worry about thieves of whatever, but four guns seemed excessive. Actually, one gun alone seemed excessive. I reached down and touched the cold metal of the weapon. I didn’t go anywhere near the trigger out of fear of accidental shooting it by sneezing or something. Jack didn’t look like he could kill if he wanted to, but I guess it was there only if he needed to.

“What the hell are you doing?!” Jack scolded me as he walked in and caught me about to pick up one of the bullets. I snatched my hand back, but it was too late because he had already saw me.

“Jack, I-I-“

“-You’re going to hurt yourself!” He fussed and closed the gun case. He closed the latched and pushed it back under his bed with the others and covered them with the boxes of shoes he had.

“I’m sorry.” I mumbled.

“You nearly had a heart attack when Tyler pulled out a gun and now here you are touching one by yourself.” He teased.

“I was curious.” I said quietly.

“Well you don’t go near those anymore. Do you understand?” He asked kind of authoritatively and I sort of liked it.

“Yes.” I answered, staring up at him with apologetic eyes.

“You’re lucky you’re so cute.” He chuckled and gestured for me to get in his bed. I got in and he got in seconds after me. I pulled his blanket over me and cuddled into his side. Jack threw his arm around me and kissed my forehead.

“How come you have so many?” I asked, and he sighed.

“I knew you weren’t going to drop it.” He stated. “I need them for protection.”

“You need four guns for protection??” I questioned, and he chuckled.

“No not necessarily. Some I just like, like my revolver. But I need one or two just in case someone comes in to hurt us. We also have a few hidden around the house too just in case.” He explained.

“Oh okay.” I said and took a deep breath.

“I’m sorry.” He apologized and kissed me on the forehead. “I know that probably scares you a lot.”

“Um yeah I’m not exactly comfortable with the news that you guys have guns hidden around the house like Easter eggs, but I trust you.” I told him and he laughed.

“They’re not just placed randomly around the house. They’re in designated spots that only Joe and I know about.”

“Can you tell me where one is?” I asked just to see if he would actually do it.

“Only to show that I really trust you. There’s one under the side table next to the couch in the living room.” He said and I chucked in disbelief.

“You guys are ridiculous.”

“Yeah sometimes the money doesn’t seem worth all the danger being a drug dealer poses.”

“Well why don’t you do something else? Or at least after high school, you can find an actual job or go to school and get a degree to do something.” I suggested, and he shook his head.

“I’m not cut out for that. This is the only thing I’m good at.” He said and scoffed.

“That’s not true.” I looked up and him and said. He rolled eyes before responding.

“It is.” He shrugged as if it wasn’t a big deal.

“You can be anything you want!” I exclaimed.

“I want to be a drug dealer.” He said, just to get me to stop talking and I glared at him.

“That’s not what I meant.”

“I know what you meant, and I get it. Now can we cuddle and watch TV?”

“Mhmm.” I smiled and snuggled more into his chest.

Jack’s phone began vibrating and he picked it up to read his text message. He was silent for a moment before sighing. I reached up and kissed his jaw and he slightly turned his phone. It seemed like he didn’t want me to know who he was texting, but I was just being paranoid. I settled back into Jack and turned my attention back to the movie. Jack continued to text with whoever for the next six minutes; it was starting to bug me a little. It wouldn’t hurt if I asked who was getting all of his attention, right?

“You must be really popular today.” I mentioned, and he didn’t respond. He was too busy replying to a message. “Jack.” I called out, raising my voice slightly.

“Hmm? He hummed and locked his phone.

“I said, you must be really popular today.” I repeated and he lightly chuckled.

“It’s just the guys.” He explained.

“You’d rather text your friends than spend time with me?” I asked, with a playful pout.

“Of course not. Let me just text him-them that I can hang out with them later tonight.” He said and sent the message. Then he sat his phone down and turned to me. “There now I’m all yours.” He wrapped his arm around my waist and face began to heat up.

“Good! Because I don’t like sharing.” I ignored the face he made and reached up to kiss him.

Notes