Failure’s not flattering
I was in the middle of changing mine and Alex’s bed when someone knocked on the door which made me jump and I looked at them to find it was the boy who shared the bed with me and Alex last night.
“Hey Jack.” The boy said and I smiled and put the washing in the wash basket and went to the cupboard and looked for some clean bedding.
“Hey.” I said quietly and walked back to find the boy sat on the bed.
“I need to make the bed.” I said and the boy smiled but didn’t move.
“From the look of your confusion on your face you don’t know which one I am, I’m Jake.” The boy said and I nodded.
“Awesome, please move so I can make the bed and then I can make sure Hallie doesn’t wake Danny and Peter up.” I said and Jake frowned at me but he got off the bed and I quickly made our bed.
“You need to slow down.” Jake said and I sighed loudly and looked at him.
“Look, Alex is a total catch and I know where we went to school he was the one all the gays was after.” Jake said and I looked at him.
“All I’m saying is that if you don’t slow down and focus on Alex he’ll walk away from this relationship.” Jake said and I looked down.
“So what your saying is that if I don’t put out and give him what he wants then he’ll leave me? Alex is completely different person to how you know him.” I said and Jake shrugged his shoulders.
“All I’m say is that a leopard doesn’t change his spots. It’s the same for Alex.” Jake said and he walked out of the room and I sighed loudly and sat on the bed and had a really long hard think about everything.
I walked downstairs and saw Alex was just enjoying himself with everyone so I went outside and sat by the pool.
I was miles away when someone sat next to me and I looked and saw one of Alex’s friends and I think it was the gay one but I don’t know.
“Alex is wondering where you are.” The boy said.
“You’re Flynn?” I asked and he nodded.
“What was Alex like when you went out with him?” I asked and Flynn smiled.
“He was a total cunt, but that’s what I liked about him. But he has changed a awful lot since I’ve been with him.” Flynn said and I sighed.
“What’s Jake been saying?” Flynn asked and I looked at him and I couldn’t get over how green his eyes was.
“That if I don’t slow down and put Alex first then he’ll either cheat on me or he’ll leave me.” I said quietly.
“Well Jake can be a ass sometimes and him and Alex go back to when they was little so Jake is defensive over Alex. But Alex isn’t the sort person to cheat or leave unless he really feels that there is not other way of saving that relationship.” Flynn said.
“Do you think Alex can do better than me?” I asked and Flynn smiled.
“Nope, Alex has been with a load of cunts and I never liked them. You are the first person I’ve actually like and hope that Alex doesn’t fuck this up.” Flynn said and I smiled at him.
“And your sister, I can happily kidnap her.” Flynn said and I chuckled.
“She’s going no where.” I said and Flynn smiled as he patted my leg and he stood up.
“Hey Lex.” Flynn said and he walked off and Alex sat next to me.
“So I heard Jake has said some things about our relationship.” Alex said and I looked down and nodded.
“Jake is really protective over me.” Alex said and I looked at him.
“Doesn’t mean he can go around saying you’re going to cheat on me if I don’t put out for you.” I said and Alex sighed.
“I’m not the same person that I was when I was in England. Yeah in England I was a total slut but I’ve changed and I want to be with you Jack. Don’t over think on what Jake has to say.” Alex said and I sighed.
“I don’t want to be that person. I’m with you and I’m happy that I’m with you. I will wait for you.” I said and Alex looked at me.
“I’ve got your back babe.” Alex said quietly as he lent forward and kissed me which I returned with a smile.
“Just ignore Jake. He has a lot going on at home and this is his holiday and he’s a bit of a grump anyway.” Alex said and I smiled at him.
“Come on, we’re all watching films and I’ve left Rudi in charge of Hallie and Christ knows what will happen.” Alex said and I chuckled and I shuffled closer to him and I rested my head on his shoulder.
“I care a awful lot about you.” Alex said quietly and I smiled.
“I know you do.” I whispered and looked at Alex and he smiled at me and he kissed the top of my head.
“Hey love birds, some mixed race kid is at the door.” Rudi said and Alex rolled his eyes and he looked at Rudi.
“That’s Asher and don’t call him that.” Alex said and he stood up and looked at me and offered me his hand which I took and Alex helped me up and we went inside.
I was in the bedroom needing to get away because everyone was being so loud.
“Stop hiding from everyone.” Alex said as he walked into the bedroom.
“Sorry, it just get too much sometimes.” I said and Alex smiled as he lead on the bed next to me on the bed.
“I know their loud but you’ll get used to after a while. Anyway you have 3 weeks to get used to them because that’s how long their here for.” Alex said and I smiled softly at home which Alex returned.
“We’re all going to the pool in a second, come and join us.” Alex said and I sighed as I looked down.
“They’ll look and judge me.” I said quietly.
“No they won’t. You’ve seen my scars and they’ve seen them as well so they won’t judge you.” Alex said.
“But I have more scars than you.” I whispered and looked at Alex.
“So, you can always put some shorts and a top on to hide most of the scars, but you shouldn’t hide them. At the end of the day the only person you should be impressing is me and I’m impressed with you no matter what you look like, you’ll always be beautiful to me.” Alex said and I looked down and felt myself blush and I felt Alex’s finger under my chin and making me look at him.
“You think I’m beautiful?” I asked quietly and Alex smiled and he kissed me softly which I returned.
“Most beautiful thing I’ve ever laid eyes on.” Alex said quietly which made me smile.
“Don’t worry what others are thinking, just remember that it’s me you have to impress at the end of the day and I’ll always be impressed.” Alex said and I nodded.
“Let’s get changed.” Alex said quietly and as he walked off his playfully slapped my ass which made me smile and look at Alex who had this cheeky grin on his face.
We was all gathered in the sitting room watching films.
Alex’s dad and Danny had gone to bed early since they both had a really stressful surgeries last night but me and Alex come to the conclusion that they was doing anything but sleeping. Asher was also crashing here for the night.
I was lead on top of Alex who had his legs on Rudi’s lap which Rudi didn’t seem to bothered about Alex using him as a footrest. while Jack and Flynn shared the other sofa with Hallie sat between them looking like she was losing her battle of staying awake and you could see that she was trying to stay awake.
“I believe little person over here is very tired.” Jake said and I looked and saw Hallie had lost her battle to stay awake.
I moved and got off Alex and walked over to Hallie and carefully picked her up and I took her upstairs to her room and stayed with her until someone came upstairs.
“I want to apologise for what I said earlier.” The person said and I looked and saw it was Jake leaning against the door frame.
“It’s fine, me and Alex has talked about it anyway.” I said quietly as I looked at Hallie.
“No because I was wrong about everything I said. I didn’t realise how happy Alex was until I caught you two having a moment before going to the pool.” Jake said and I just nodded and got off the bed and walked out the room where Jake followed me to Alex’s room and we sat on the bed.
“Alex said that we could help each other through some stuff which is going on in our lives, but that’s only if you want to talk.” Jake said and I smiled and looked at him.
“Depends on what we’re talking about.” I said and Jake smiled.
“Hallie has Down’s syndrome.” Jake said and I nodded.
“Yeah, as cute as she is it’s pretty obvious that she isn’t like the rest of us.” I said as I looked down.
“That’s like with my sister Billie, she has autism and can display some really challenging behaviours. But people just don’t understand.” Jake said and I looked at him and smiled.
“Wouldn’t have Hallie another way though, I have an older sister who is ‘normal’ and she is more trouble than Hallie.” I said and Jake chuckled.
“I’ve got an older brother who has ADHD and has mental health problems and Billie with her problems so I’m the normal child in my family.” Jake said and I chuckled.
“Alex said to us when we got here not to bring this up but I’m going to because I really need someone who has been in my shoes to give me some advice.” Jake said and I looked at him and frowned.
“Your mum has passed from dementia.” Jake said carefully and I looked down for a few seconds before I looked back at Jake.
“Yeah, my mum passed 3 weeks ago.” I said quietly.
“I’m so sorry.” Jake said and he put a hand on my knee which made me smile.
“It’s why I keep busy. I need to have something keeping me busy because if I stop for just a tiny second I will break down.” I said and Jake smiled.
“My dad is stage 5 in Parkinson’s.” Jake said and I looked at him.
“It’s hard work isn’t it?” I asked and Jake sighed and nodded.
“God yes. I mean having Billie around as well is really hard work.” Jake said and I chuckled slightly.
“I know how you felt on that one. But your mum helps doesn’t she?” I asked and Jake smiled as he nodded and looked at me.
“Yeah mum is literally the rock of the family. Don’t know what I would do without her.” Jake said and I looked down and I missed Mum a lot.
“Did your dad help you?” Jake asked and I looked at him and shook my head.
“My dad is in prison.” I whispered and Jake patted my leg.
“Trust me it’s a long hard road, but always remember the good times. If you keep hold of them then they’ll always stay close to you.” I said quietly.
“It’s hard to do that when all you see is the person who was once fine and now they’re completely different now to what they was maybe a month ago. It’s hard to think on the positive when you see nothing but negative.” Jake said and he looked down but I made him look at me.
“But at least the disease your dad has doesn’t take away everything that person once was. By the time my mum died she didn’t know who I was, she still thought she was in Lebanon and I was a child from there. Hallie got robbed from spending time with mum, her only memory of mum is lying in bed and speaking a language she doesn’t understand.” I said and Jake nodded and he moved and pulled me into a hug which I returned.
“You stealing my boyfriend now?” Alex said and I jumped and moved away from Jake which made Jake chuckle.
“Nope, not my type if I was into guys.” Jake said as he stood up and looked at me.
“If I bug Alex enough, could I add you on Facebook or something and if I need someone to talk to I could talk to you.” Jake said and I nodded.
“Just ask Alex and he’ll give it to you.” I said and Jake smiled as he pulled Alex into a hug and said something quietly to him and he walked out the room.
Alex walked over and sat on me as he pushed me back on the bed with a cheeky grin on his face which made me smile as Alex lent forward and kissed me.
“See told you he wasn’t that bad.” Alex said as he sat on me.
“Guess he isn’t.” I said and Alex smiled as he lent down and kissed me which I returned.
“Everyone is asleep downstairs so I thought I’d come up here and keep you company.” Alex said and I smiled.
“Thought we could have our own movie night, since I haven’t really spent that much time with you.” Alex said and I nodded.
“I like that idea.” I said quietly and Alex kissed me again but this time he moved to my neck and started to kiss my neck and it felt like he was trying to mark me.
Alex pulled back and he looked at me.
“You can tell me if I go too far, I won’t do nothing if you don’t want to do anything.” Alex said softly as he cupped my face which made me smile.
“I know.” I whispered and Alex smiled softly.
“I’m going to have a shower, you’re welcomed to join me if you would like.” Alex said and I smiled and nodded.
“A shower sounds good.” I said quietly and Alex got off me and off the bed and he offered me his hand which I took and Alex guided me to the bathroom.
I was stood watching Alex strip himself down to his pants and I looked him up and down.
Alex walked over to me and he stood close to me.
“May I?” Alex asked as he caught hold of my top and I nodded at him as he pulled my top over my head I raise my arms so he could pull it off.
“You need to start eating more, you’re still too thin.” Alex said as he ran his hands up and down my sides.
I put my hands on Alex’s toned body and gently ran my hands down his chest.
For some reason it just made me start crying.
“Hey, why you crying?” Alex asked softly as he made me look at him.
“You’re beautiful and then there’s me looking ugly.” I sniffed and Alex kissed me hard which I returned.
“You are beautiful as well.” Alex whispered and he rested his forehead against mine.
“I’m really not.” I said and Alex looked at me.
“Yes you are now don’t argue with me.” Alex said and looked at me like he would look at Hallie when he was telling her off which made me chuckle and playfully pushed Alex which made him smile.
“I’m not 5 and I don’t answer to the name of Hallie.” I said and Alex smirked at me as he walked back over and caught hold of my jeans and pulled me forward.
Part of me wanted to stop but the other part was wanting more.
I felt Alex undo my jeans and he looked at me which I nodded and Alex pulled my jeans down and I stepped out of my jeans.
I looked down and tried to steady my breathing and when I looked up Alex was naked and I just stared at him.
Alex smiled at me which made me frown but then I understood that he was giving me time and space so he got in the shower and started to run the water.
Once I got myself together I took my pants on and pulled back the curtains and looked at Alex who smiled at me and moved so there was room for me in the shower and I stepped in and stood under the shower and smiled to myself at how nice the water felt on my skin.
I had my back to Alex and I felt his wet skin on my back and Alex wrapped his arms round me and he kissed my shoulder.
“You’re gorgeous, has anyone ever told you that?” Alex said quietly as he kissed along my shoulder and then kissed the back of my neck.
“I have a bit of a confession.” I said as I looked down.
“Please don’t say your straight.” Alex said and I chuckled and I turned round and looked at him.
“I’m not straight. But I’ve never been in a relationship before.” I said quietly and I looked down ignoring the sight of Alex’s dick.
Alex made me look at him.
“That doesn’t matter, because I’ll make this your first and only relationship.” Alex said softly and kissed me which I returned.
Alex reached out for something which made me flinch slightly and Alex smiled at me.
“Relax, I was getting the shampoo. Now turn around and let me wash your hair.” Alex said quietly as he managed to massage my scalp which felt really nice and I moaned quietly since it felt really nice and Alex chuckled.
“Do you like that?” Alex asked quietly and I tipped my head back a bit more.
“This feels really nice.” I said quietly.
After we had a shower we climbed out and got into bed and we was cuddling watching a film and for the first time in a really long time I finally feel content in my life which made me cuddle up more to Alex’s side.
“You okay babe?” Alex asked and I looked at him and nodded.
“Yeah, I think for the first time in my life I feel like I’m content with myself.” I said and Alex smiled as he rolled over and pinned me to the bed which made me giggle slightly.
“But don’t get too happy about it. I’ve got to go and get mum ashes and find somewhere nice to scatter her ashes.” I said and Alex smiled as he lent down and kissed me as he messed with my hair.
“I’m going to be right beside you when you do that. But as long as I don’t have exams or tutoring because then I won’t be able to be beside you.” Alex said and I smiled and nodded.
“You sure you don’t want to go back to school? You can always copy my notes and I can always help the best I can.” Alex said and I was going to say something when our door opened and someone walked over.
“Oh god please don’t say your having sex.” Someone said and Alex rolled off me and sat up and looked at the person.
“Way to ruin the mood Asher.” Alex grumbled.
But Asher couldn’t give two shits and he climbed on the bed and lead behind Alex.
“Do you mind? Get the fuck out of our bed.” Alex said and Asher looked at us.
“Cheers babe love you.” Asher said and I sighed and rolled over so my back was to them and I heard Alex slapped Asher’s chest.
“Thanks for ruining the mood Ash.” Alex said and he rolled over and cuddled into my back.