Boys don’t cry.

Alex’s POV
I was busy sorting some lunch out for Jay as he was going to nursery today when Jack came out and he had a frown on his face.
“Why that’s a serious frown for first thing in the morning.” I said and Jack smiled as he walked over and kissed my cheek.
“That son of yours has decided he does t want to get dressed and is running round the place naked.” Jack said and I chuckled as I put Jays lunch in his bag.
“Free the balls.” I said and Jack chuckled as he gently pinned me to the side and kissed me which I returned.
“We don’t have time for this.” I said as Jack picked me up and sat me on the side.
“I finish work early today.” Jack said sounding hopeful which made me chuckle.
“Well I’m here on my own while he’s at nursery doing coursework. So I guess if your back before I have to pick him up then we might be able to do something.” I said as I kissed Jack and I heard Jay run through the sitting room.
“Daddy!” Jay said happily and I looked at him and smiled as I covered my eyes because he was naked.
“Oh no naked baby.” I said as Jack moved and I got down of the side and walked over to Jay and picked him up and put him over my shoulder which made him laugh loudly as I went to his room to get dressed.
I was busy getting Jay dressed as he was talking loudly about something.
“Is that so baby, but right now you need to get dressed because you are going to nursery to make friends and have fun because me and papa have a lot to do today.” I said and Jay looked at me and smiled which I returned as I put a jumper on his and untucked his T-shirt collar.
“There’s my handsome boy.” I said and Jay went all shy and walked over to me and climbed onto my lap and hid his face in my chest.
“Go and find papa while I go and get dressed.” I said and Jay nodded as he walked out the room.
“Papa.” Jay said as he walked off looking for Jack which made me smile as I went to mine and Jack’s room and got dressed.
Once I got dressed and sorted myself out I went to the sitting room where Jay was playing with his toys and I went to the kitchen where Jack was in his work clothes.
“Have you even washed your clothes?” I asked and Jack looked at me and raise a eyebrow at me.
“Yes I have, but I do work with cars and oil isn’t that easy to get of my clothes or my hands.” Jack said and I smiled at him as I walked over to him and caught hold of his hands as I kissed him which Jack returned.
“I’m only messing.” I said quietly as I kissed Jack again and I turned round and got Jays bag.
“Come on trouble we have somewhere to be, come and say goodbye to papa.” I said and Jay stood up and he ran to the kitchen and over to Jack where Jack picked him up and hugged him as he kissed his cheek.
“Be a good boy okay and I’ll see you later.” Jack said as he looked at Jay who gave Jack a kiss and Jack put him down.
“Ready trouble?” I asked and Jay nodded as he stood by his pushchair waiting for me to say bye to Jack.
“See you later and drive carefully.” I said as I kissed Jack which made him chuckle.
“Always am.” Jack said quietly as he kissed me again and I went over to Jay and we went to nursery.
I was stood with Jay in the playground and Jay was unsure a little bit and he also did look a little lost as well which made smile.
I looked round and saw a couple of people looking at me because I’m sure I was The youngest person here with a kid.
“Are you Jack?” A woman asked as she walked over to me.
“Nope, Jack is my partner I’m Alex.” I said and the woman smiled as she stood next to me and I looked in the pushchair and saw a baby which wasn’t that old and I looked at Jay and messed with his hair.
“Newborns, can never wait to get out of that stage.” The woman said and I chuckled softly as a little boy ran over to the woman.
“Zeke, this is Jay he’s new here.” The woman said and the boy looked at Jay and smiled as Jay hid between my legs.
After a couple of seconds Jay moved and looked at the little boy.
“Play with me.” The boy said and Jay looked at me for reassurance and I nodded.
“Go on then.” I said and Jay gingerly walked with Zeke and I looked at the woman and smiled which she returned as she checked on the baby.
“They grow quick don’t they?” The woman said and I smiled as I looked at Jay.
“Yeah they do.” I said as I saw Jay fell over and he started to cry and he stood up and looked round for me.
“Daddy.” Jay sobbed as he looked at me and I walked over to him and picked him up and Jay wrapped his arms round my neck and Jay cried into my neck.
“Oh dear.” I said as I kissed the side of his head and that’s when my phone went off and I looked at it and it was Jack which made me frown as Jack never phoned me when he was at work.
“Hey babe, what you doing phoning me?” I asked as I put Jay down who caught hold of my jeans and stayed as he spun himself round my leg.
“Are you Alexander?” A strange voice asked which made me frown even more.
“Yeah I’m Alexander, why do you have my partners phone?” I asked as I began to panic about Jack.
“Sir I need you to come to the hospital.” The hospital said and I looked at Jay.
“I’ve got to take our kid to nursery and then I’ve got to travel to the hospital, I’ll be there as soon as I can.” I said to the person.
“Okay.” The person said and hung up and that’s when I started to really worry and panic so I picked Jay up and held him close to me.
“Is everything okay?” The woman asked and I looked at her.
“I need to go.” I said quietly as I put Jay is in push chair and I walked off with Jay crying.
I got to the hospital and went to the nurses station.
“My partner got brought in I don’t know about an hour ago.” I said as I tried to calm my breathing and I looked at Jay who looked confused.
“Their name?” The nurse asked.
“Jack, his name is Jack Barakat.” I said and the nurse looked at me.
“Please I need to now if my partner is okay.” I said as Jay started to whine and I bent down and picked him up and balanced him on my hip.
“Bed 11.” The nurse said and I nodded and I turned round and looked for Jacks bed.
When I found Jacks bed I found a doctor round him.
“What happened to him?” I asked and the doctor looked at me and smiled.
“What relation are you to Mr Barakat?” The doctor asked.
“I’m his partner, please tell me what happened to him and if he’s going to be okay.” I said as I put Jay in his pushchair as he had fallen asleep.
“Mr Barakat has been in a serious car accident.” The doctor said and I looked at Jack and went to walk over to him but the doctor stopped me.
“Mr Barakat is going to be taken down to surgery.” The doctor said and I looked at him as I tried to snap out of this nightmare.
“W..Why?” I asked carefully.
“He has got some serious injuries and some internal bleeding.” The doctor said and I looked back at Jack.
“Someone will be here in a minute.” The doctor said as he stepped to the side and I walked over to Jack and caught hold of his hand.
“Oh baby what has happened to you.” I whispered as I felt a tear roll down my cheek and I quickly wiped his away.
“Don’t fucking die on me okay, please don’t leave me and Jay, we love you okay.” I whispered as I sniffed and I lent down and kissed his forehead and I stepped back as someone came to take Jack to surgery.
“Don’t let him die please, he’s all I have other than my son.” I said and the nurse smiled at me as she caught hold of my hand.
“We’ll do everything we can.” The nurse said as she walked off and I looked at Jay as I tried not to cry.
I was sat in the waiting room and I phoned Jack’s mum as I needed someone to look after Jay for me.
I rung her number and waited for her to pick up and I didn’t have to wait long for her to pick up.
“Hey Alex.” Joyce said happily and I sniffed down the phone.
“Sweetie What is the matter? Have you and Jack finished?” Joyce asked and I shook my head as I sniffed.
“No we haven’t finished, but I need you too look after Jay for me as something bad happened to Jack and he’s in hospital having surgery.” I said quietly and I heard Joyce move around at the other end of the phone.
“What happened Lex?” Joyce asked.
“I don’t know, I was taking Jay to nursery and I got a phone call saying he was in hospital.” I said quietly.
“Okay Lex, I’m coming to the hospital alright. I’ll be there as soon as I can.” Joyce and I nodded as I hung up the phone and looked at Jay who was busy playing with the toys which I had just Incase.
“Come here baby.” I said quietly and Jay looked at me and he got up and walked over to me and I picked him up and I held him close to me and I felt tears roll down my cheek.
“I love you little man.” I said quietly as I hugged him and I put him down as Jay looked at me which made me smile at him.
Jay went to his pushchair and got his blanket which comforted him and he gave it too me with a smile I had I returned.
“Thanks baby.” I sniffed as I held onto it tightly as Jay went back to playing with his toys.
Joyce came in the waiting room and she quickly spotted me and walked over to me and sat down next to me and pulled me into a hug.
“Oh Lex I’m sorry.” Joyce said quietly as I returned her hug and tried not to cry.
“Do you know what happened?” Joyce asked and I shook my head.
“It was Jays first day at nursery and I was with him when someone phoned me and said Jack was here and then I came here with Jay and found Jack and he had serious injuries and internal bleeding and he needed to go to surgery.” I said as tears rolled down my cheeks and Joyce hugged me tighter.
“Jack is going to be okay Lex.” Joyce quietly.
“I can’t loose him, not after losing mum and dad. I can’t loose him not in a year of losing dad.” I said as I started to cry and Joyce held me close to her.
“Daddy.” I heard Jay say and I pulled back and looked at him and smiled at him as I picked him up and sat him on my knee.
“Where’s papa?” Jay asked as he looked at me.
“Papa is poorly so he’s in hospital.” I said quietly and he looked at Joyce.
“You are going to stay with nana and bam bam tonight.” I said and Jay frowned at me confused because he hasn’t stayed with Jack’s parents before.
“Grumpy?” Jay asked and I looked down.
“Grumpy is with grandma in the sky.” I said quietly and Jay nodded.
“Go to nana.” I said quietly and passed Jay over to Joyce.
“You going to be okay here on your own?” Joyce asked and I just shrugged my shoulders as I looked at Jay and smiled at him.
“I’m probably going to be on the phone to Luna to be honest. Haven’t really spoken to her for a while.” I said quietly.
“I’m sure we’ll be okay looking after little man. You just look after yourself at the moment okay. Don’t worry about Jay or even Jack. Jack is in good hands with the nurses and the doctors, they will look at Jack and you need to focus on yourself now.” Joyce said and I nodded as I looked down.
“Have you got a key for the apartment, I know Jack was saying he was going to get you one cut Incase something happens or if we go away.” I said quietly and Joyce shook her head.
“No we haven’t, but we do have some clothes at home for little man so you don’t have to worry about tonight.” Joyce said and I nodded.
“I’ll come round tomorrow and give you an update and see little man.” I said quietly which Joyce nodded to.
“Right little man, say goodbye to daddy.” Joyce said and Jay got up and walked over to me and I gave him a cuddle and kissed the side of his head.
“Be good okay, I’ll come a see you tomorrow.” I said as I gave Joyce Jay and he started to cry when Joyce put him in the push chair.
I took my hat off and gave it to Jay which quietened him down a little and Joyce gave me a quick hug before she walked out and I was on my own.
I was busy pacing or if I was sat down I couldn’t stay still.
It felt like forever before someone came to give me a update on Jack and a surgeon came and found me.
“Are you Mr Barakat partner?” The surgeon asked and I looked at them and nodded as I stood up but they shook their head and they sat next to me.
“Please tell me my partner is okay.” I said quietly and the surgeon smiled slightly.
“Mr Barakat is in a critical condition at the moment as he had a lot of internal bleeding and he was in a bad way when he came in.” The surgeon said and I looked down as a few tears rolled down my cheeks.
“Is he going to make it?” I asked quietly.
“At the moment it’s touch and go. But if he makes it through the night and he get through the next surgery he has to go through then I think he is going to be okay.” The surgeon said and I nodded as I looked at them.
“Can I see him please?” I asked and the surgeon nodded as they got up and I followed them to where Jack was.
When I got to Jack’s room there was a police officer stood outside the door and I walked over to him and looked into Jack’s room.
“Do you recognize this picture?” The police officer asked and held out the picture and I pulled my eyes off Jack and looked at the picture and I smiled as I looked at it.
“Yeah, it’s our son Jayden.” I said quietly as I sniffed.
“Are these Mr Barakat belongings?” The police officer asked and I looked and I nodded but at the same time I couldn’t find Jack’s wallet.
“His wallet is missing.” I said quietly and the officer nodded as he took notes.
“Where was you at the time of the accident?” The officer asked.
“You think I tried to kill my boyfriend? I have been with him for 3 years and I fucking love him to death so don’t you fucking dare say or think I had anything to do with this!” I said loudly which got the attention off the nurses.
“Just answer the question sir.” The officer said and I looked down and shook my head.
“Well you aren’t going to find any of my DNA on the fucking car because I never touched the fucking thing!” I said loudly again and a nurse came over.
“Is everything okay?” She asked softly.
“This asshat is accusing me of trying to kill my boyfriend!” I said trying not to let my emotions get the better off me but it wasn’t working very well.
“I just want to take you off the suspect list.” The officer said and I scoffed.
“Well you must have some fucked up people over on this side of the pond because I would never hurt my boyfriend. I would never lay a hand on the person I fucking love. Now can I go in and see my boyfriend or are you going to arrest me for something I have never done.” I said as I sniffed and I rolled my sleeves up and the officer looked at my arms where I had scars.
“Never seen someone with scars before?” I said sarcastically.
The officer frowned at me and the nurse touched my arm.
“Sweetie are you okay?” The nurse asked and I put my hands on my head.
“I need to be with him.” I said quickly as I looked at Jack.
“Sweetie is there anything we can do to help you?” The nurse asked and I shook my head as I carried on looking at Jack.
“Are you finished because the boy is clearly upset and this. I also believe the way he his acting suggests he has had nothing to do with this so you are to leave him alone while he is in this room.” The nurse said seriously and the officer nodded and walked off and I looked at the nurse and smiled.
“Is he going to be okay?” I asked quietly and the nurse smiled at me again.
“Tonight is going to be the biggest fight he’s going to have.” The nurse said and I nodded as I looked back at Jack.
“Please look after him for me.” I whispered as I sniffed.
“You can go in and sit with him. You being near him may keep him hanging on.” The nurse said and I looked at her.
“Am I allowed?” I asked quietly and she nodded.
“In you go sweetie, I will warn you that us nosey lot will be coming in and checking on him throughout the night.” The nurse said and I chuckled.
“It’s fine, our 1 year old enjoys waking us up in the middle of the night for his cuddles or midnight chats.” I said and the nurse chuckled.
“You think it stops when their older, trust me it doesn’t.” The nurse said and I smiled.
“In you go okay, I’ll go and get you a blanket and a pillow so you can hopefully get some sleep.” The nurse said and I nodded and went inside.
I walked over to the chair and I kissed Jack on the forehead and then sat down as I caught hold of his hand.
“Hey babe.” I said quietly as I ran my thumb over Jack’s knuckle and I sniffed as I felt some tears roll down my cheek.
“Please get better baby. Me and Jay are nothing without you.” I said quietly as I put my head down on the bed and sighed loudly.
“I’m going to stay right beside you, it’s going to be me and you against the world and Jay is our little mascot or whatever.” I said quietly as I sniffed.
“I love you okay, don’t give up on us.” I whispered as I linked my finger with his and I let myself go into a very restless sleep.

Notes