Just Another Reason I Could Never Forget You

It had been nearly a week since John and I’s fight and we had just wrapped up for the evening in Albuquerque. Alex had continued to be my friend, and I found myself confiding him in more and more about day to day life, while John and I seemed to be getting closer and closer in another way. I felt amazing when I was with him and I didn’t know how to begin to explain how he was managing it. He smiled at me and my god damn day was made, I felt like I was floating on air.
We were currently hanging around drinking beer near the buses, a low key kind of deal where basically we had pulled a few chairs out and set up a cooler with beer and nothing harder than that. Pat and Jared had taken a rain check, as had many others from the other bands, including Zack. I was currently curled in John’s lap, the pair of us taking turns in drinking from his bottle. Alex and Jack were sat with us, as were Kennedy and Garrett, all of us debating what we were going to be doing during the break. With only two more dates left on tour, I was definitely psyching myself up for it.
“I’m just happy I’ll be home tomorrow,” I yawned. “I can wake up in my nice, big bed that doesn’t smell like sweat and boys and sweaty boys.” We would be setting off home in less than an hour, making it into Tempe around 6am and I was honestly going straight home to enact this ridiculous plan to sleep in my big ass bed. I had gone so far as to arrange for Vinny to set up my booth so I didn’t have to get up before 11. It was going to be the best sleep I’d had since returning from summer tour and I was so down for it.
“Your bed will smell like sweaty John in less than 24 hours,” Kennedy scoffed. I aimed a kick at his shin, missing as I always did, but not trying to argue with him about it. He was definitely right, but sharing my bed instead of occasionally managing to squeeze into the same bunk or falling asleep on the couch together didn’t feel like something to complain about.
“No more PG-13,” I shrugged, choosing John’s analogy for the promise we had most definitely not stuck to. John chuckled underneath me, knowing it was a lie. “PG-13, right,” Kennedy scoffed. “The only secret you two keep worse than you kept your ‘secret’ feelings is your ‘secret’ boning.” I flipped him off, taking a drink of John’s beer and settling back into my seat.
“Honestly, I’m just excited to bone again,” Jack groaned jokingly. I gagged into my beer, just as jokingly.
“She’s been gone a week, and I’d appreciate if you didn’t defile my best friend.” A smirk crossed Jack’s face as he went to reply and I heard a faux whining from directly behind me.
“I thought I was your best friend,” John said as I turned to look at him, seeing the pout on his face. I chuckled, pecking his cheek swiftly.
“You are, but Jack doesn’t try to defile you so I don’t need to protect you.” “As far as you know,” Jack retorted. I groaned loudly, throwing my head back into the crook of John’s neck, closing my eyes and pointedly ignoring his words.
“So, are the rest of you excited to be heading home?” Alex asked. I didn’t bother to reopen my eyes, this question decidedly not aimed at me.
“Seems pretty lame, but I kinda miss my family,” John replied, shrugging. “Up until this year we didn’t really spend all that much time apart, you know?”
“Aw, Johnny misses his mommy,” Ken cooed mockingly. I opened my eyes to scowl at him for mocking John, but he ignored me.
“Yeah, man, I miss my mom, fuck off.”
“I get that,” Alex nodded. Jack coughed loudly, only half trying to hide his response of ‘momma’s boy’ behind the noise. “Bite me, Barakat,” he snapped back jokingly.
“It’s okay, Alex,” I shrugged. “Your mom’s a babe and she makes better waffles than Joyce.”
“You take that back!” Jack gasped.
“Your mom wouldn’t gossip with me though,” I pouted. “Is would make me coffee while Alex slept and gossip about what the neighbours were doing.” I felt John tense underneath me, taking the bottle off me. I glanced back at him, flashing him a smile, which he reciprocated. It was a weird kind of argument I was having.
“My mom wouldn’t let you stay over.”
“Which is why she wouldn’t gossip with me!”
“Hey, is Jenny coming to see us?” Kennedy asked, interrupting Jack and I, something I was super grateful for as it meant I could end the conversation without further awkwardness.
“Yeah, man, she’s coming to the show tomorrow,” John laughed. My heart sank. Shit. Shit, shit, shit. I’d been so wrapped up in my stupid tour bubble that the day to day issues of my life in Arizona escaped me. John, the ever-doting son and utter momma’s boy we had just been mocking Alex as, had invited his mother to tomorrow’s show. To say Jenny wasn’t fond of me felt like an understatement. She’d never been openly hostile toward me, but I was most decidedly her least favourite person in her son’s life.
My eyes widened and I turned to face Alex so John couldn’t see my utter panic. He frowned at me, silently asking me what was wrong. I excused myself quickly, shooting a look at Alex that told him to follow me. It was unsettling knowing I had to impress her from now on. Before now, it had been upsetting, but not enough that I was going to dwell on it. Now, however, I knew her continued dislike of me was going to ruin my relationship. John trusted her opinions, though he’d been decidedly oblivious so far. He was like Alex, in that if you got along with his mother, you were basically for keeps. One or two of his exes had gotten along with Jenny ridiculously well. They’d lasted the longest. Anybody who didn’t get along with her lasted a couple of weeks tops. He might not have had his big meet-the-parents moments with girls before now, but, come on, the guy still lived at home. Girls got dragged into that house on the regular just to hang with the five of us.
“You need to help me,” I all but pleaded as Alex found me around the corner, out of earshot of any of our friends.
“Whoa. What’s up?”
“Jenny. She hates me. I mean, I’m tolerated in the house, but I’m not welcome. I’m definitely not welcome to a relationship with her son.” Alex raised his eyebrows at me, not seeming to believe a word I had said.
“You’re the girl who plays parents like she plays guys. Tell me you’re joking.” “I broke her son’s heart, Alex. Repeatedly. For two years. Tell me how I play that one.” Admittedly, that wasn’t the reason she disliked me. I didn’t know what the reason was, only that it predated any of my bullshit with John. He’d invited me to his to study one night, which led to dinner with his parents, and I immediately realised she didn’t like me. I got the feeling she didn’t trust me. I was pretty sure she saw through me to everything I’d ever tried to hide from anyone.
“Okay, breathe,” he replied. “You got this, okay?”
“No, Alex, I don’t,” I snapped back.
“You do,” he chuckled lightly. “You know exactly how to play this. You play dinner-with-the-parents like a champ and flattery comes easily to you.”
“I’ve tried that,” I whined. “She doesn’t trust me or some shit, so everything time I say something nice she just fucking narrows her eyes at me and says thanks like you would to some asshole who didn’t hold the door.” Alex raised his eyebrows at me incredulously as I continued to complain.
“Hol, she sounds like a fucking bitch.”
“Alex!” I gasped. “She’s not a bitch, she’s just protective of her eldest child, alright?”
“I’ve got it!” He grinned. “The only way you get through to this woman is to be nice about John.” I opened my mouth to protest, certain I’d tried this before when I realised I quite simply hadn’t. I’d tried my normal shit on her when I realised she didn’t seem to like me and it had gone down like a lead fucking balloon, so I’d resigned myself to her never liking me.
“Why does it feel like we’re concocting some sort of insidious plan?” I muttered, a feeling in my gut like I should maybe just try being honest with her and that this was far too much like the crap that got me here in the first place.
“We’re not. His mom just doesn’t see what the rest of us see yet, but she will. When you see her tomorrow you just need to take a deep breath and keep your head. She’ll love you in no time, I guarantee it.” He pushed my hair back behind my ears, smiling at me to reassure me and I felt myself getting lost in the look in his eyes, a look that told me he believed in me, that he loved me and had all the faith in the world in me.
“Hey, guys, we’re uh—we’re heading out in five,” Jack called. I flinched away from Alex’s touch, looking over at our frowning best friend. “You’re lucky I came around this corner,” he sighed.
“Nothing was happ—”
“Yeah, yeah, I know, Alex. But there’s a lot to be said about the way things look, you know?” I heard Alex grumbling to himself and I shot him a small smile before heading toward Jack. “You need to be careful,” he said quietly.
“We weren’t doing anything. He was helping me with something,” I muttered as he continued to follow me.
“And between him still being in love with you and John worrying you’re still in love with him, how do you think it’s going to play out if you keep relying on him like this? I’m not trying to start another argument, really I’m not, I’m just making sure you see this clearly. I haven’t seen Alex this happy in years, hell not since before you left, which is how I know you need to be more careful with him.” I thought back to the look in Alex’s eyes as Jack had come around the corner, frowning. No, he knew we were just friends, there was nothing more to it than that.
“Okay,” I sighed.
“Thanks, Jase, I owe you one.” He grinned at me, pulling me into a short hug as we returned to our group, who were clearing up their mess ready to go. John looked up, flashing a smile at me and I grinned in response, making my way back to him.

Notes