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VOID (reposted)

Chapter 3 - Car Rides With Stupid Guys

You would think that grown men who have been in the serious music industry for almost 10 years would be able to handle themselves when one their songs comes on the radio. They can't.
“OMYGOD JACK IT'S OUR SONG!” Alex yelled from the backseat. “Turn it up PLEASE omygod.” Okay, if I would've known they'd be this crazy, I would've told a Charlote to put in the aux cord. She probably wouldn't do it anyway, since she's too embarrassed that all of her playlist consist heavily of All Time Low.
“YOU’VE COME THIS FAR YOU'RE ALL CLEANED UP YOU'VE MADE A MESS AGAIN!” They screamed. Then again, she could've taken a bullet this one time. “There's no more trying time to sort yourself out!” Charlotte joined in. “Don't encourage them!” I yelled over the loudness. By now the car was a screaming mess of the boys screeching, Alex hitting unnecessary high notes, and Charlotte’s harmonizing. I can't even hear myself narrate.

Of course I love the song too, it's one of their best, but I am not about to sing in front of these guys. I sound like a dying whale. Who's getting killed by a sick cat. Who is also at the same time dragging their claws across a blackboard. Not pretty. “HOLD ON TIGHT, THIS RIDE IS A WILDDD, ONE! MAKE NO MISTAKE THE DAY WILL COME WHEN YOU CAN'T COVER UP WHAT YOU'VE DONEEE!” They are honestly about to drive me crazy. We were about 5 blocks away from the venue by now, and Charlotte doesn't even know where she's taking us. If I could read her mind, I would say she'd try and sneak them back to her place, and make it look like an accident. Except now that they're getting along really well, she won't want to jeopardize that with a stupid fangirl move.

"NOW DON'T LOSE YOUR FIGHT KID.” “DON'T LOSE YOUR FIGHT KID!” Alex yelled the backing vocals. Really?! I turned down the radio hastily. “Hey?!” “What the fuck?” They yelled at me. Charlotte turned to her right and gave me the death glare...again. “Hey, we've been driving for about 10 minutes now, and you guys haven't even told us where the fuck we're going! Also if you forgot in that short amount of time, it's fucking raining outside!” The boys looked at me shocked, and I almost regretted yelling at them. Almost.

“Oh shit my bad,” Jack finally said. “Just take us back to our hotel on Ox Street-” Alex shyly said, before he was interrupted by Jack again. “NO WAIT my friend is throwing a bomb ass party at The Standard and we have to go.” He sank back in his seat after his outburst. “Omg you guys hang out at The Standard?!” Charlotte asked happily. Considering that both of these people are rich and I don't know what “The Standard” is, I'm guessing it's somewhere really fancy. “Yeah dude every time we come to L.A. we have to party on the rooftop,” Jack said. Charlotte’s eyes nearly popped out of her head. “Seriously?! I go to the rooftop at least every other weekend,” she explained. "What are you guys gonna do party in the rain?" I scoffed sarcastically.

"It's never stopped them before," Alex mumbled. "Got that right!" Jack yelled, throwing Charlotte a high-five from the backseat. "Hey, both hands on the wheel!" I scolded. I know she's probably having the time of her life right now, but I'm honestly surprised that we haven't gotten into a car crash from her lack of focus. Charlotte's usually the mom-friend in this relationship, but I guess I'll have to step up now that she's loss all common sense. "Jeez Lennon don't be such a square," Alex said, leaning over my seat. I grabbed his face and pushed him back in response.

"Owww rejected!" Rian teased, making the other guys laugh. Except Alex of course, who was sheepishly rubbing his head from the blow. I covered my face with my hair to hide my blushing cheeks. I don't even know why I'm blushing, it's not like Alex was actually trying to make a pass at me. It's just, stupid boys being stupid. Right? "Aw I didn't mean to hurt you that bad," I cooed, turning around and ruffling his hair. "Ah! I thought I told you not to fucking touch my hair!" He shrieked, quickly fixing the brown mess. Everyone laughed. I didn't want to embarrass Alex, but it was the only way I could keep my cool around him. He shot me a look and I mouthed back "sorry". He smiled, "it's cool." My heart swelled in my chest. That smile and those eyes ... they were hypnotizing. No wonder girls get so sucked into him.

He continued to stare at me, and I'm sure a blush has crept back onto my cheeks by now. But I couldn't turn away. "THERE IT IS!" Jack shouted, breaking us out of our trance. I looked out the front windshield and saw the huge building in front of us. "That's The Standard?" I asked. It was a hotel. I was totally expecting a 21+ nightclub or something. "Yep. It's one of the most expensive hotels in L.A." Charlotte explained. I snorted. "What?” Alex asked. “Nothing. You guys just live these fancy ass lives and I could barely pay for the bus after buying your tickets,” I said. Alex just blinked at me. I couldn't tell if it was because he didn't know how to react to my complaining, or if my story was just that damn sad. He started to say something, but was cut off by Jack's announcement.

"Guys look the rain stopped, this is fucking awesome!" he said. Charlotte yelled in agreement. "You girls are definitely coming to party with us, right?" Jack asked. "Please say no," Rian mumbled. I guess he's the dick out of the group. I thought it was Jack, but he seems to be acting nicer, at least toward Charlotte."Rian. Shut up," Alex glared at him. He then shifted his chocolate eyes to me, patiently waiting for a reply. I turned to Charlotte, biting my lip, unable to speak under his gaze.
"You bet," she responded.

Notes

So if you've read this before, I actually changed the ending a lot just to make this chapter worth more and transition better into the next one. It's way better in my opinion, but that's all the updating I'm gonna do today, next chapter should be up in a couple of days :)

Comments

Ah, that's okay, thanks for taking my feedback into mind. :) That's awesome of you to do... I feel like a lot of writers often ignore me when I make suggestions, lol, or like already have a plan in mind, so they don't bother with changing anything.
But like I said, if this throws things off too much, I can look past it, I just thought it was a lot happening at once, considering the pace of the other chapters. Don't want you to worry over it too much. So, if you're up for rewriting, go for it, but again, I'll be here when you continue either way. :)

Nanook Nanook
3/20/18

@Nanook
Hey, sorry this is so late, I was trying to figure out how to respond the right way. This did put me off a bit, but I completely understand your point. I'd tried to write this chapter about 4 different times, and this idea wasnt very well thought out and I kinda just wanted to put something out there. Switching povs WAS Supposed to bring new information to the story, stuff that Lennon might not be aware of. Alex IS slightly a player and a flirt in this story, but I'd like to think that he wouldn't want to cheat purposely. I' thinking of rewriting it and trying again, maybe without him having a gf this time. Thanks

Hiii... I'm still here, I swear! Sorry for the delayed comment; just have had a hectic time trying to get on here lately to read things.
But anyway... interesting new update. I'm a bit confused though, and maybe this is a warning to be cautious: I felt like this chapter almost belonged to a completely different story. I can understand maybe wanting a switch in POV, but I feel like this chapter is a total divergence to the original story started in Lennon's POV. First of all, the fact that Alex is hiding his other relationship, which comes a bit out of nowhere. Second, that he suddenly sees his ex AND kisses her at a party, after being caught in a near-kiss with Lennon... this also comes a bit out of nowhere. It just... seems like a lot all of a sudden, for one chapter, for the story...
I know you're rewriting though a bit/reposting, so I don't want to discourage you, but just want to give my honest feedback. I'll still stick around to read, and maybe this is just diving into the full concept of the story, just in a quick manner. Idk. But I'm unsure how to feel about Alex's intentions now. Like, the first three chapters he just seemed like this innocent love interest, and now he seems bad. Very bad. I guess maybe what would've been better is if him having someone at home was maybe introduced the second chapter, and then this chapter just being the ex. That could've maybe helped frame it better.
Just want to be honest and hopefully give some helpful/useful feedback. I did still find the chapter great, it was just kind of a lot to take in at once. Like, I feel like there was two or three character developments that should've been spread in say, three chapters, if that makes sense.
But again, not meant to discourage, only want to give you honest feedback. Hope that you continue writing! Interested in seeing more! :)

Nanook Nanook
1/11/18

You're back!!! I'm so glad!!! I love how she can read him so well, that she always seems to know what he is thinking/feeling. Can't wait for more!

hopeless1313 hopeless1313
1/4/18

OMG an update. :O Was wondering what happened with this story.
I'm just excited to get to the new stuff. New stuff! New stuff!! New stuff! XD
But still, great as it was before. :D Interested in seeing what happens next. :)

Nanook Nanook
8/8/17