Secrets Don't Make Friends

Jack

I felt like shit Monday morning. My alarm went off telling me it was time to get up for school, and I turned it off and rolled back over. Hopefully I could just pretend to over sleep and my mom would let me skip today.

I pulled my phone off its charger and saw that I had messages from Cass and Zack. I went to read Cass's message, but ignored Zack's.

Cass Pope

Rian told me what happened between you and Alex. Find me at lunch so we can talk.

Read 7:02am

Now I really didn't want to go to school. I didn't want to talk about what happened between Alex and I and I didn't want to see Alex. I wish I could be home schooled... or at least switch schools.

I closed my iMessages app and clicked on Instagram. I looked through everyone's pictures of them enjoying their weekend while I had the worse one of my life. Alex hadn't posted anything and he hadn't blocked me surprisingly. I switched over to Twitter to see if he had said anything on there. As soon as it opened I saw tweets from Alex in the "in case you missed it" section.

Alexander William @AlexanderG
Don't you hate being lied to?

Alexander William @AlexanderG
Well at least I have LOTS of inspiration for new music!

Alexander William @AlexanderG
I missed being single anyways...

Alexander William @AlexanderG
@SheWantsTheVic let's go out this weekend. I need lots of vodka and lots of weed

Alexander William @AlexanderG
"Once a whore you're nothing more" I love Paramore!

Alex's tweets had already been retweeted and liked by many people from school. It was obvious he was talking about me and we were broken up. That meant most people at school would know and they would most likely take Alex's side because he was more well-known than me.

I pressed the home button and locked my phone before tucking it under my pillow. I hated social media and I hated high school. I didn't even realize I was crying until my tears fell down my cheek. This was probably the most I've ever cried over Alex.

"Jack why are you still in bed? Get up before you're late." My mom scolded me. Luckily I was facing away from her so she wouldn't see that I was crying again. I clear my throat before talking to her.

"Can I skip today? I don't think I can do this." I pleaded.

"Honey if you skip because of Alex then you're letting him win. You need to go to school so you can show him that it's possible for you to live without him." She said.

"But if I see him I'll just start crying."

"Try your best to avoid him and if he tries to talk to you then ignore him."

"He won't try to talk to me. He hates me." I mumbled.

"How about you just try to go today and if it becomes too unbearable then you can call me and I'll check you out of school." She suggested.

"Okay. I'll try." I told her.

"Okay, I'll be back in thirty minutes to check on you." She said and left.

I sat up and my stomach began to churn. I hated having morning sickness but it was starting to ease up a little bit. I didn't feel sick every morning. According to google that meant I was at least six weeks pregnant. I quickly went to my bathroom and sat on my knees in front of my toilet. It took a few minutes, but I finally threw up and relieved a little bit of my nausea. Then I stood up and brushed my teeth.

I went to my closet and pulled out a hoodie and a pair of jeans. My pants were a little loose on me which was probably due to all the morning sickness. I put on one of Alex's shirts he left here but covered it with my hoodie. I placed my grey beanie on my head and put on my black Vans. I still didn't want to go to school. The thought of running into Alex was making me shake.

"Oh good I was afraid you might have went back to sleep." My mom said when she walked back in. "I made breakfast if you want to eat before we leave."

"I'm not really hungry." I said.

"Well the small creature in your stomach might be so you should eat a little for him or her." She said and I nodded. I grabbed my backpack and followed her downstairs.

I took a seat at the table and my mom brought me my pancakes already cut up and covered with syrup. There was also eggs, bacon, and orange juice. I covered my nose as the sweet smell of syrup entered it. Then I pushed the plate away.

"The syrup is making me feel sick." I told her.

"Oh sorry I didn't think about that. Here." She put the eggs and bacon on another plate for me and sat it in front of me. I thanked her and began eating. The entire time I ate I couldn't stop thinking about what my bacon would taste like if it was dipped in peanut butter. I ignored my brain telling me to try it and ate my food as it was.

"Did you want more?" My mom asked when she saw I how quickly I finished my food.

"I'm not really starving. But I can't stop thinking about eating bacon and peanut butter." I said and she laughed.

"It's your pregnancy cravings. You'll crave some pretty weird combinations." She said as she went into the pantry and grabbed our jar of peanut butter. She used a knife to spread some of it on a piece of bacon and handed it to me. I thanked her and took a bite. It surprisingly wasn't as bad as it sounded. I hummed as I finished the whole piece and asked my mom for another.

"Why have I never tried this before?" I asked excitedly, as I ate my second piece.

"Because you've never craved it. I had some pretty weird cravings with you like cucumbers and ketchup, pickles and chocolate, and pineapple and pizza. That one freaked me out the most." She told me and I laughed.

"Well hopefully mine don't get that weird."

"You're off to a great start." She joked and pointed to my peanut butter covered bacon. "Oh we should go before we're late."

"Oh alright." I mumbled. My mood fell once I remembered where I was going.

I picked my backpack up and followed my mom to the door. I walked out before her and walked out to her car. I got in on the passenger side and put my seatbelt on. I was hoping the ride to school would take forever, but every traffic light we got to was green. I pouted when we made it to my school in six minutes instead of the normal twelve.

"Hey look at me." My mom said as she pulled up in front of my school to drop me off. "You'll get through today! Just focus on learning and nothing else. You only have a couple of months before graduation, then you'll never have to see any of these kids again." She told me and I nodded.

"I know." I sighed.

"You'll be okay, baby." She said and kissed me on the forehead.

"Thanks mom. I'll see you this evening." I took a deep breath and got out of the car. I waved to her as she drove off. Then I took another deep breath before walking into the building.

I walked straight towards my first class while looking down at the ground. I don't know why I was nervous right now. Alex was probably in the back of the school with Rian and his other friends or else he was in his car getting high. The bell rang when I made it to Statistics and I walked into the classroom. I took a seat and laid my head on my desk.

"Are you okay, Jack?" My teacher, Mrs. Evans, asked me.

"Yes ma'am. I just have a slight headache." I told her and she nodded understandingly.

Over time the classroom became filled with students. I felt self-conscious being in the room. I felt like everyone knew that I was pregnant and didn't know if Alex or Zack was the father. Every time I heard someone laugh I felt like it was directed towards me. Today was going to be a long day.

*****

Lunch couldn't come sooner for me. I wasn't going to the cafeteria out of fear of seeing Alex. Instead I made my way towards the library. I was going to sit in there and do my stats homework.

"Jack!" I heard Cass call me name. I reluctantly stopped and turned around.

"Where are you going? And where have you been? You haven't returned my messages or calls! I've been worried sick about you." She scolded me.

"I'm fine, Cass, and I'm going to the library so I can do some homework." I told her.

"Why don't you come eat with me? We can sit at our own table." She suggested and I shook my head. I would rather die than go in there.

"No thanks, I'm just going to go do my homework."

"Well how about I come with you?"

"I kinda just wanna be alone right now, Cass."

"But I'm worried about you. You just found out that you're... you know and then I hear from Rian that Alex broke up with you and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if something happened to you and I didn't stop it. This is a lot for you to handle on your own."

"My mom and grandma have been helping me. I'm fine, I promise." I told her again and she nodded.

"Okay. But Jack if you need anything please come to me. I don't care what time it is or how big it may be, just call me okay?" She begged.

"I will." I assured her. "Thanks Cass."

She didn't look like she wanted to leave me alone, but she did it anyways and I walked to the library. I went to a table in the back and sat down. I pulled out my phone and saw a message from my mom and a new one from Zack.

Mommy Dearest <33
How's school going?
Read 12:44pm

Jack
It's okay. I haven't seen him today so I feel fine.
Delivered 12:45pm

Mommy Dearest <33
That's good! Your day is half way over. Just two more hours and then you can come home.
Read 12:46pm

Jack
Yeah hopefully I'll make it
Delivered 12:46pm

Mommy Dearest <33
I believe in you :)
Read 12:47pm

I decided to open Zack's most recent message just to see if it was important.

Zack Merrick
Did you come to school?
Read 12:47pm

I didn't answer back. I didn't need Zack trying to find me and try to talk about anything. I just wanted to go to school and go home like my mom said.

I pulled out my homework and finished it by the time the bell rang. I gathered up my book and papers and placed them back in my backpack. I didn't want to go to my next class. It was the one that was right across the hall from Alex's. I was afraid that I might see him on the way. I walked out of the library and decided to take the longer way to class. Hopefully that way I would avoid seeing Alex.

I made to the hall my class was in, one minute before class began. I walked down towards my class and saw Alex turning into the hall way. My heart stopped as I saw him laughing with Vic about something. I couldn't help staring at him. It looked like he wasn't fazed by our break up at all.

Alex looked up and his eyes locked with mine for two seconds before he rolled his and looked away. I looked down and walked into my Bio classroom. I wish I would have ran to the bathroom and called my mom to check me out. I felt tears build up in my eyes and I took a deep breath. I sat at my desk and tried to keep myself from blinking so no tears would fall from my eyes.

"Hey, Jack." I felt my lab partner, Patrick, tap on my shoulder.

"Hey." I mumbled.

"What happened between you and Alex? I saw on Twitter that he said he's single." He asked and I took a deep breath.

"I don't want to talk about it." I told him and he nodded.

I didn't pay attention in class. I just stared at the board as our teacher talked and occasionally looked at the clock. It felt like an eternity later the bell finally rang for school to be over. I slowly packed up my stuff so I could be the last one out of the room. I figured Alex would be out of his class by now so I wouldn't accidental run into him.

I slowly walked out of my class and the hall was mostly cleared. I didn't see Alex so that was a good thing. I walked to the front of the school and walked out of the doors. I was going to have to walk home now since Alex obviously wasn't going to take me home anymore.

I looked across the parking lot and saw Alex, Rian, and Cass standing in our usual spot talking. It made my heart hurt worse to see them all going on without me.

"Do you need a ride?" I heard Zack ask from behind me.

"No I'm fine, thanks." I quickly said and tried to walk off.

"Jack wait. I just want to help. And you don't need to walk in... your condition." He told me.

"Haven't you helped enough?" I snapped at him. I walked off and this time he didn't stop me.

I walked down the school parking lot until I made it to the sidewalk. Just that small walk made me break a sweat. I pulled off my hoodie and wrapped it around my waist and continued walking.

Soon a truck started to slow down next to me as I walked. I slowly looked over and saw that it was Zack. He had rolled down his window to get my attention.

"It's going to take you thirty minutes to walk home when I can have you home in five." He told me and I ignored him and continued to walk. "The AC in my truck feels soooo good." He bribed and I rolled my eyes.

"I'm fine." I told him.

"Well I'm going to follow you all the way home to make sure you get there safely." He said and I stopped and turned to glare at him. "Just let me take you home so I won't have to worry about you." He pleaded.

"If I say yes then you will take me straight home and drop me off. And there will be no talking about anything during the whole ride. Is that clear?" I asked.

"Crystal." He answered.

I opened the door and stepped in. I closed the door and put my seatbelt on before Zack drove off. Luckily it wouldn't take long to get to my house because this ride was going to be awkward.

"I know I'm not supposed to talk, but are you hungry or do you need anything?" Zack asked quietly.

"No." I stated. I didn't want this ride to be longer than it needed to be. He nodded and continued to take me home. Zack parked in my driveway when we made it to my house. I opened my door and grabbed my backpack.

"Thanks for the ride." I told him.

"You're welcome. I can take you home from now on if you want." He offered.

"Um I'll see about that. Bye Zack."

"Bye Jack." He said and I closed the door.

I walked inside of my house and went straight to my bed.

*****

*Alex*

"Look at him, he's walking home." Cass pointed out sadly as we watched Jack walk across the parking lot. "Go offer him a ride!" She demanded.

"What part of I'm not talking to him ever again do you not understand?" I asked and she glared at me.

"So you're just gonna let him walk? He's pregnant for fuck-sakes."

"That's not my problem... Well it might not be. He shouldn't have cheated on me." I said, stubbornly. I did feel bad watching Jack walk, but I was too angry to even consider giving him a ride. That car ride would have been too awkward.

"You're a fucking monster. You might be the father!" She whispered-yelled at me and I rolled my eyes.

“Guys.” Rian sighed, trying to get us to stop going back and forth with each other.

"Well how about you and Rian give him a fucking ride!" I yelled back.

"We will! Rian let's go." Cass fumed.

"I'll see you later, man." Rian told me and I nodded.

I watched as he and Cass got in his car. They began to drive in the direction towards Jack, but Zack's truck got to him first. I saw Zack roll down his window and talk to Jack as he walked. He followed Jack for a minute I guess trying to convince him to get in. Jack stopped after a while and got in Zack's truck. He closed the door and Zack drove off in the direction of Jack's house.

I couldn't help the sense of jealousy that washed over me. I shouldn't have cared, but Zack was taking Jack home and probably going to console him about our break up. Jack probably wouldn't even care about our break up for long because he had Zack there to help him. That made me feel even worse. Jack cheated on me and now he was hanging out with the person he cheated on me with. He and Zack we perfect for each other.

Notes

They're both hurt, they just have different ways of expressing it!

Title Credit: Take Cover by ATL (of course)