Dirty Laundry
18
2015
Alex knew that Riley was going to be mad at him once he came back from his guy’s night out.
He knew it wouldn’t be because he didn’t exactly mind whenever their waitress unnecessarily brushed her breasts against his arm while serving the table.
He also knew it wouldn’t be for the new tattoo he spontaneously got when some of the guys stopped in a tattoo shop on their walk from the restaurant to the bar a few blocks away.
It would be because he broke his promise…
“Cars are here!” Rian called out to everyone. As the most sober one of the group, he was making it his personal mission to make sure all the guys were accounted for.
Alex pulled a couple of bills from his wallet and placed them on the bar as a tip for the bar tender. He’d generously tipped after each drink he ordered but he always liked to leave a little extra at the end to make up for anyone else who may have been feeling cheap or forgot.
He was about to follow the rest of the guys towards the exit when he noticed Brian still sitting at the end of the bar by himself, slowly sipping from a drink.
“Hey man, the cars are here,” Alex said, coming up next to Brian.
“What?” he asked, looking up from the bar top.
“We’re going to head back to the bus now. You good?”
Brian lifted his half full glass to Alex and shook his head. “I think I’ll hang out here a little longer.”
Alex nodded and waved the bartender over. “Two more of…” he paused, looking at the brownish liquid in Brian’s glass, “of whatever he’s drinking,” he finished, taking a seat at the empty bar stool next to Brian.
“You don’t have to do that…” Brian mumbled.
Alex shrugged. “I want to,” he decided, sending a quick text to Rian that he was going to stay and would get his own ride back to Brian later.
Brian didn’t say anything and just took another sip from his drink.
The pair sat in silence for a while. Alex only spoke when he thanked the bartender for bringing the drinks he ordered. The second he took a sip and tasted the straight Jameson, he quickly figured out where Riley’s hard liquor choice came from.
“This is weird.” Brian finally said once he finished his drink. “Just ask me whatever you want to ask me…”
Alex was silent for a little longer before letting out a long sigh. “Are you okay?”
Brian laughed. “Am I okay?”
Alex shrugged. “Are you?”
Brian leaned back on his stool and stretched his arms above his head. “I honestly don’t know. I could have just went back to my bunk after the show tonight with my own bottle of Jameson and continued binge watching Breaking Bad on my laptop, but I thought I’d feel better if I went out…. You know, distract myself.”
“Did it work?”
Brian laughed and reached for the second drink that Alex ordered, that he just assumed was for him. “Not at all.”
“Sorry.” Alex mumbled.
“When we got the call for this tour, I was so fucking excited. I knew this tour was going to change my life. I just didn’t realize how…”
Alex stayed quiet. He just took a sip from his drink.
“I thought we were going to get to play shows in cities we haven’t had a chance to get to… We would get to play to bigger crowds we normally wouldn’t get to and hopefully pick up some new fans along the way… We would get to spend time on the road with good friends and make new ones…”
“Those things can still happen…” Alex tried.
“You know, when I walked over to your bus that day and saw Riley there, my mind didn’t even immediately go to all the bad stuff. My initial reaction was just to be happy I got to see her again.”
Alex nodded slowly.
“And then everything changed so quickly when…” he paused unable to actually say the words.
“Look, I can’t even begin to imagine how you’re going to handle this. I don’t even know if I have anything I could say to help. All I know is that you should probably talk to Riley.” Alex said, even though he was one-hundred-percent not supposed to. “I know that it’s not my place to even say anything but I want to help and I know that’s the best thing to do.”
Brian shook his head. “I get it. She’s your girlfriend. Of course you’re going to have her back and take her side. I just don’t know if I’m ready to do that yet…”
“Yes, Riley is my girlfriend and I will always have her back but the other night when she finally told me everything that happened between you guys – stuff I’m sure you don’t even know – I made it very clear that I thought it was all pretty shitty. It’s nice to be in a grown up relationship where you don’t have to be afraid to tell your partner when they suck.”
“How could she lie to me about this?” Brian asked, not really looking for an answer as he took another long sip from his drink. “She was my best friend, Alex.”
“She was more than just your best friend though, right?” Alex asked. He wasn’t even sure why he asked. He knew the answer. And the answer wasn’t going to help either one of them right now.
“Technically, no. She was never more than just my friend. I never really had the guts to change that.” Brian admitted.
“Why do you think that is?”
Brian shrugged. “Have you ever loved someone so much that it scared the shit out of you?”
Alex nodded. “Of course.”
“That’s why.”
Alex nodded again and a thick and awkward silence fell over the two men as the sipped from their glasses. It took a second before they realized they were both referring to the same girl.
“I don’t still feel that way about her…” Brian finally said, breaking the silence. “It’s been some time. I’ve moved on from those feelings now.”
Alex nodded quickly. “Right, I know. Of course.”
There was more silence.
“I’ll talk to her,” Brian decided.
“You will?” Alex asked hopeful.
“Eventually.”
“And you’ll talk to her because you want to and not because you feel like I made you, right?”
“You didn’t make me…”
“Right,” Alex nodded. “Remember that because if Riley finds out we had this little chat, she’s going to get mad at me.”
“Oh?”
“She didn’t want me talking to you about any of this.”
Brian narrowed his eyes and smirked slightly. “She runs a tight ship, huh?”
“Not exactly,” Alex laughed. “More like she didn’t want me to say anything that would ruin our friendship.”
“That’s sweet…” Brian nodded. “But let’s be real… How good of friends are we? You’ve been dating her for four years and I never knew?”
Alex shrugged. “I know. I was thinking that too. Just goes to show you how often touring friends really see each other...Plus, she doesn’t like me posting about her on social media.”
It wasn’t until that moment that Alex truly understood why Riley deeply disapproved of him posting pictures of her and Summer on his social media. She never knew who would see them.
“This is still so fucking weird,” Brian groaned. “I am actually having a hard time even believing this is real. How the fuck am I supposed to be a dad?”
“I know that it’s not anywhere near the same level, but when I found out Riley had Summer it wasn’t exactly easy for me either.”
Brian held his face in his hands as he let out another groan. “I also can’t believe she named her Summer...”
”Yeah,” Alex shrugged. “I guess in hindsight it makes sense your her father.”
”She’s not named Summer because of the band,” Brian dropped his hands. “Riley and I used to watch The OC together. Summer was a character on the show. The last night Riley was in Arizona before she left, I told her if we ever found ourselves having a kid again, if it was a girl, I wanted to name her Summer. Fuck... she was literally pregnant while we had that conversation,” Brian explained, rambling off to himself towards the end.
Alex stared as the brown liquid in his glass, unsure what he could possibly say. He hadn’t drank too much that night and had a slight buzz going but at this point, he was starting to wish he was much more drunk.
“Wait,” Brian’s eyes shot open. “You didn’t know about the kid right away?” he asked, effectively sort of changing the subject.
“Nope,” Alex shook his head. “We’d known each other for a few months and had been dating for a little while before she told me.”
“How is that even possible?”
“It’s kind of a long story…”
“I think I’d like to hear it.”
Alex took a big sip to finish off his drink. “Well…
***
Alex knew that Riley was going to be mad at him once he came back from his guy’s night out.
He knew it wouldn’t be because he didn’t exactly mind whenever their waitress unnecessarily brushed her breasts against his arm while serving the table.
He also knew it wouldn’t be for the new tattoo he spontaneously got when some of the guys stopped in a tattoo shop on their walk from the restaurant to the bar a few blocks away.
It would be because he broke his promise…
“Cars are here!” Rian called out to everyone. As the most sober one of the group, he was making it his personal mission to make sure all the guys were accounted for.
Alex pulled a couple of bills from his wallet and placed them on the bar as a tip for the bar tender. He’d generously tipped after each drink he ordered but he always liked to leave a little extra at the end to make up for anyone else who may have been feeling cheap or forgot.
He was about to follow the rest of the guys towards the exit when he noticed Brian still sitting at the end of the bar by himself, slowly sipping from a drink.
“Hey man, the cars are here,” Alex said, coming up next to Brian.
“What?” he asked, looking up from the bar top.
“We’re going to head back to the bus now. You good?”
Brian lifted his half full glass to Alex and shook his head. “I think I’ll hang out here a little longer.”
Alex nodded and waved the bartender over. “Two more of…” he paused, looking at the brownish liquid in Brian’s glass, “of whatever he’s drinking,” he finished, taking a seat at the empty bar stool next to Brian.
“You don’t have to do that…” Brian mumbled.
Alex shrugged. “I want to,” he decided, sending a quick text to Rian that he was going to stay and would get his own ride back to Brian later.
Brian didn’t say anything and just took another sip from his drink.
The pair sat in silence for a while. Alex only spoke when he thanked the bartender for bringing the drinks he ordered. The second he took a sip and tasted the straight Jameson, he quickly figured out where Riley’s hard liquor choice came from.
“This is weird.” Brian finally said once he finished his drink. “Just ask me whatever you want to ask me…”
Alex was silent for a little longer before letting out a long sigh. “Are you okay?”
Brian laughed. “Am I okay?”
Alex shrugged. “Are you?”
Brian leaned back on his stool and stretched his arms above his head. “I honestly don’t know. I could have just went back to my bunk after the show tonight with my own bottle of Jameson and continued binge watching Breaking Bad on my laptop, but I thought I’d feel better if I went out…. You know, distract myself.”
“Did it work?”
Brian laughed and reached for the second drink that Alex ordered, that he just assumed was for him. “Not at all.”
“Sorry.” Alex mumbled.
“When we got the call for this tour, I was so fucking excited. I knew this tour was going to change my life. I just didn’t realize how…”
Alex stayed quiet. He just took a sip from his drink.
“I thought we were going to get to play shows in cities we haven’t had a chance to get to… We would get to play to bigger crowds we normally wouldn’t get to and hopefully pick up some new fans along the way… We would get to spend time on the road with good friends and make new ones…”
“Those things can still happen…” Alex tried.
“You know, when I walked over to your bus that day and saw Riley there, my mind didn’t even immediately go to all the bad stuff. My initial reaction was just to be happy I got to see her again.”
Alex nodded slowly.
“And then everything changed so quickly when…” he paused unable to actually say the words.
“Look, I can’t even begin to imagine how you’re going to handle this. I don’t even know if I have anything I could say to help. All I know is that you should probably talk to Riley.” Alex said, even though he was one-hundred-percent not supposed to. “I know that it’s not my place to even say anything but I want to help and I know that’s the best thing to do.”
Brian shook his head. “I get it. She’s your girlfriend. Of course you’re going to have her back and take her side. I just don’t know if I’m ready to do that yet…”
“Yes, Riley is my girlfriend and I will always have her back but the other night when she finally told me everything that happened between you guys – stuff I’m sure you don’t even know – I made it very clear that I thought it was all pretty shitty. It’s nice to be in a grown up relationship where you don’t have to be afraid to tell your partner when they suck.”
“How could she lie to me about this?” Brian asked, not really looking for an answer as he took another long sip from his drink. “She was my best friend, Alex.”
“She was more than just your best friend though, right?” Alex asked. He wasn’t even sure why he asked. He knew the answer. And the answer wasn’t going to help either one of them right now.
“Technically, no. She was never more than just my friend. I never really had the guts to change that.” Brian admitted.
“Why do you think that is?”
Brian shrugged. “Have you ever loved someone so much that it scared the shit out of you?”
Alex nodded. “Of course.”
“That’s why.”
Alex nodded again and a thick and awkward silence fell over the two men as the sipped from their glasses. It took a second before they realized they were both referring to the same girl.
“I don’t still feel that way about her…” Brian finally said, breaking the silence. “It’s been some time. I’ve moved on from those feelings now.”
Alex nodded quickly. “Right, I know. Of course.”
There was more silence.
“I’ll talk to her,” Brian decided.
“You will?” Alex asked hopeful.
“Eventually.”
“And you’ll talk to her because you want to and not because you feel like I made you, right?”
“You didn’t make me…”
“Right,” Alex nodded. “Remember that because if Riley finds out we had this little chat, she’s going to get mad at me.”
“Oh?”
“She didn’t want me talking to you about any of this.”
Brian narrowed his eyes and smirked slightly. “She runs a tight ship, huh?”
“Not exactly,” Alex laughed. “More like she didn’t want me to say anything that would ruin our friendship.”
“That’s sweet…” Brian nodded. “But let’s be real… How good of friends are we? You’ve been dating her for four years and I never knew?”
Alex shrugged. “I know. I was thinking that too. Just goes to show you how often touring friends really see each other...Plus, she doesn’t like me posting about her on social media.”
It wasn’t until that moment that Alex truly understood why Riley deeply disapproved of him posting pictures of her and Summer on his social media. She never knew who would see them.
“This is still so fucking weird,” Brian groaned. “I am actually having a hard time even believing this is real. How the fuck am I supposed to be a dad?”
“I know that it’s not anywhere near the same level, but when I found out Riley had Summer it wasn’t exactly easy for me either.”
Brian held his face in his hands as he let out another groan. “I also can’t believe she named her Summer...”
”Yeah,” Alex shrugged. “I guess in hindsight it makes sense your her father.”
”She’s not named Summer because of the band,” Brian dropped his hands. “Riley and I used to watch The OC together. Summer was a character on the show. The last night Riley was in Arizona before she left, I told her if we ever found ourselves having a kid again, if it was a girl, I wanted to name her Summer. Fuck... she was literally pregnant while we had that conversation,” Brian explained, rambling off to himself towards the end.
Alex stared as the brown liquid in his glass, unsure what he could possibly say. He hadn’t drank too much that night and had a slight buzz going but at this point, he was starting to wish he was much more drunk.
“Wait,” Brian’s eyes shot open. “You didn’t know about the kid right away?” he asked, effectively sort of changing the subject.
“Nope,” Alex shook his head. “We’d known each other for a few months and had been dating for a little while before she told me.”
“How is that even possible?”
“It’s kind of a long story…”
“I think I’d like to hear it.”
Alex took a big sip to finish off his drink. “Well…
***
Notes
For anyone that's still interested in this story.. Yayy, an update! Sorry for the awkward cliffhanger, but at least in the next chapter you'll see how Alex finds out about Summer. :) #spoileralert
I hope people are still reading this. I'm suddenly feeling re-motivated with it so hopefully new chapters will get posted more frequently.
XO
If you could come back and update, that'd be great <3
1/23/19