Dark affairs

3 years later

While I'm standing in the kitchen mushing carrots I look over to the living room to see Jack sitting on the couch fiddling around on his guitar and I can't help but think back.

After Alex broke up the band, Jack had nothing to do. He never had another job in his life so he was unable to come up with an alternative.
We hoped that as soon as Alex had sorted out his problems he would come back and contact Jack, maybe even rejoin the band but no such thing happened and as the months passed it became clear that this was final.

Jack even offered to leave the band and sent Rian and Zack to get Alex to come back to them but they returned saying that Alex had refused, stating he wanted to have a new start and erase all the memories of the band. He gave them no further clue about the real reason behind his departure and neither did we so they gave up frustratedly. We stayed in contact but it got less and less over the years.

Then Jack fell into a depression having not only lost his best friend but also the thing he enjoyed the most, his music.
There were weeks that he would spend lying in bed the whole day and only getting up to go out drinking. It was horrible. I tried to help him but there was only so much I could do. I couldn't bring back his band or his friend.
He told me so many times he regretted ever starting this thing with Alex and I couldn't argue, it was great while it lasted but was it worth it in the end?

Then one day when I was at work I get a call from Jack sounding excited, "guess what Mickey! I found the perfect house!"
I frown, what is he talking about?
"For us!" He adds when I don't answer.
I chuckle, "Honey, is this your subtle way of asking me to move in with you?" I tease.
He barks a short laugh, "huh? YES! It is!" He yells back, " but not only that it is also the proposition to start a company with me!"
"What! What? Jacky, what's this all about?" I'm completely overwhelmed, just yesterday he lay buried under the covers refusing to get up and today he wants to start a business. That was the first I had heard of this.
"Listen baby, lets talk about this when I come home, okay? I'm glad you're feeling better though, I love you." I tell him happily.
"I'm glad too, and I love you more, can't wait to tell you all about it. I'm gonna pick you up from work." Jack screams before he ends the call.
This conversation had put a smile on my face and the three hours until work let's out fly by.
......
"Okay, I had this brilliant idea and it would be perfect for us. So I got up and looked for the suitable house and I found it." Jack babbles on and on so I silence him with a quick kiss.

"Darling, I have no idea what you're talking about, can you please start from the beginning?" I giggle. I'm so happy to see him back to his old giddy self, I missed his hyperactive childishness so much these last months.

He takes a deep breath and holds onto my forearms suddenly looking insecure, "Look, Mickey, I want you to tell me if you think this is stupid, but I was wondering ... what would you say if you and I start, like, a recording studio maybe even offer additional music management in the future?" He looks at me expectantly holding his breath awaiting my answer.

I mull his idea over in my mind, it's nothing I had considered before but with my technical knowledge and his connections and experience in the music industry..... this might actually work!
It's like Jack sees the thoughts behind my forehead because he starts smiling even before I say something. So he continues "...and we could have this all in this house I found. Live and work together, it would be perfect." He ducks his head and places a quick peck on my lips before he pushes me away enough to look into my eyes.
I nod and smile happily returning the kiss. "Yes! Yes, Jack! That would be perfect!"
I throw my arms around his neck and squeeze him close to me, releasing a sigh of relief. I haven't felt this happy in so long.

So we bought the house and I quit my job, my boss Martin actually was not even mad because he knew he could have never given me this opportunity and subsequently recommended our company to bands and managers so we went into business pretty fast and because we delivered good work we had plenty of projects and we were loving it.

I place the food to the side and squeeze myself in the space between my boyfriend and my puppy on the couch sighing contently. "Have I told you boys recently how much I love you?" I tease ruffling Jack's hair and Max's fur affectionately at the same time.
Jack looks up from his guitar grinning, "I hope I come before the dog in this."
I tut at him ",of course not Jay, you know puppies always come first." We fall back into the cushions together laughing, my boyfriend tickling me as punishment and I'm trying to fight him off, when we are disturbed by a knock on the door.
I look at Jack with a frown because we hadn't invited anyone today. He shrugs but gets up and I follow him to the front door curiously.

Not in a million years would I have expected the person standing there when Jack opens the door.

Alex.

We stare at each other in shock and nobody says a word.
He looks skinnier and worn out as if he hadn't looked after himself for a while.
His hair is greasy and disheveled, dark circles show under his bloodshot eyes and he has grown a scruffy beard. He is a shadow of the man he used to be.

Now I notice the suitcase that sits beside him. He lowers his head defeated and mumbles, "we're getting a divorce".

And then he breaks down, literally. He collapses onto his knees and starts sobbing into his hands.
Jack and I share a look of horror and in an instant we crouch down beside him and bring him inside and sit him down on the couch between us.
We don't really know what to do so we keep quiet and just watch him come undone.
It is awkward mainly because there is a lot of resentment on our side. He has caused us so much pain, has abandoned us, pushed us to the side like trash and yet he is here now and he's hurting.

I reach out my hand and pause in the air hesitantly before I pat his back awkwardly, Jack turns a little towards Alex, who has his face still buried in his hands and whispers, "Alex, what happened?"
This triggers another round of sobs and crying but he starts to explain, "when Lisa found out about us, I was terrified she would abandon me and I would be alone, I always felt like I was only an addition to your relationship so if she would leave me I would have nothing. I begged her to stay and she said she would under one condition, I would have to cut all ties with you and never see you again. And...and so I did. I was so stupid! I wanted to mend my marriage but realised I tried to fix something that never worked that well. I started to hate her for forcing me to leave what I loved, you and the band, my music. She argued I could go solo but I had lost my inspiration, I couldn't write a single song in all these years. It was getting progressively harder to live together the more I realised how manipulative she is. We were at each other's throats for the last year and finally we agreed to separate. I have signed the papers this morning." Here he stops as if reality had just set in and he takes a few slow breaths to calm down, then he continues with a broken voice, "I am aware that you guys probably hate me for what I did and I fully understand if you'd kick me out and tell me to never speak to you again but....but I had nowhere to go and I never stopped thinking about you - Every. Single. Day.....I'm sorry....I'm so so sorry!" He hadn't looked at us during the whole speech, sitting with his knees drawn up, his head hanging low and his arms hugging himself and then he starts sobbing again, roughly brushing away his tears with the sleeves of his hoodie.

There is a moment of silence when I hear the sound of little feet pit-patting along the hallway towards the living room. My eyes go wide and I bite my lip anxiously because this is definitely the worst timing but when I look to the door there stands my baby boy.
His dark brown curls ruffled and hanging into his eyes, his cheeks flushed from sleep, in his little pyjamas with stars and rockets printed on. The whole commotion must have woken him from his afternoon nap. He leans shyly against the doorframe chewing on his fingers and rubbing his eyes with his other hand, watching us curiously then he points to Alex and asks, "Mama, who dis?"
I inwardly groan because I'm not ready for this but Alex's head snaps up when he hears the voice, having not noticed the little boy yet.
It looks like his eyes are going to pop out of his skull and his jaw nearly hits the floor, then he looks from Jack to me and back, "you...you guys...I didn't...is that?" He stutters.

I mentally thank Jack for staying cool and taking over because I'm frozen to the spot unable to respond. He opens his arms and immediately there is a smile on my baby's face and his dimples show as he runs to his dad and climbs onto his lap hugging him. Jack holds him protectively in his arms when the little boy hides his face from the stranger only to peek at him through his daddy's fingers.
"Alex," he introduces with a proud smile, "this is our son."
Alex's face has lost all its colour as he stares at the little kid in Jack's lap. "Wha- What's his name," is all he can muster his voice barely beyond a whisper.
"William Jackson Barakat. Will, this is our good friend Alex." Jack ends his introduction beaming as Will offers a little wave to the visitor.

The information takes a while to register as Alex blinks a few times just staring at the boy as if he has never seen a toddler before. "William?," he repeats wondering then it seems to click in his brain so he turns to me, "wait, what! how old is he?" His eyes searching my face for an answer that lies deeper than what he asked but I just mumble defeated, "two years and three months." And I close my eyes and swallow thickly.

Again it takes a minute before he replies now back to staring at the boy cuddling into Jack. "That was when....is it?....could it?...like...Guys!" His eyes are wide with panic as he pleadingly looks from Jack to me.
But there is nothing I can tell him. When I found out that our ménage a trois had consequences and told Jack that I was pregnant, he was over the moon and refused to take a paternity test, stating he doesn't care and it wouldn't make a difference because he would love the child either way and he stayed true to his word. He was the best dad any kid could hope for and Will loved him with all his heart. Sometimes I would notice similarities to Alex features and behaviour but he also was so much like Jack that I had never made up my mind about it.
"As I said," Jack slowly repeats looking straight at Alex, "this is our son."
Alex looks at Will's cute little face and solemnly nods.
"And also," Jack goes on nonchalantly, hoisting himself up from the couch while bouncing the little boy until he giggles and making his way to the kitchen to give Will his carrots while speaking over his shoulder, "get your ass in the guest room, there will always be a place for my best friend in our house...and I guess there's always room for another dad in Will's life."

Notes

This is it, Thank you all for staying with me until now. I can't believe it took me five months to get the story out. I suppose this ending isn't very satisfying but I rarely do happy endings. I prefer endings that leave room to continue the story in your own head and I think there is plenty of room here. ;)
Anyway, I hope you enjoy!