I Was Doing Just Fine Before I Met You.

"Um. Is this really happening?"

I bit my lip anxiously, flickering my gaze from the purple hand towel thrown carelessly over my bathroom counter over to the remaining look of shock across Parker's pale face. I clicked my tongue, feeling my fingers twitch as I clasped my hands together over my crossed knees.

"Shut up." I mumbled, dropping my gaze to the rough material of my skinny jeans. "I can't think right now."

"You..." He trailed off, almost sounding breathless. "Oh shit, Jack."

I looked up with wide eyes, cringing when I noticed him holding the short white stick awkwardly between his fingertips.

"No." I choked out, feeling my heart pound in my rib cage as he stared down at the screen. "Parker-"

"It's positive." He revealed, looking down to me with his mouth open. "Very clearly positive."

I sucked in a quick breath, feeling my eyes burn as they welled with water. Rolling my quivering lips together, I looked up a little when he flipped the little stick towards me. I swallowed thickly, barely looking over the bold lines before I dropped my gaze back to my legs.

"Oh God." I whimpered, bringing my hands up to cover my face.

"Um. I would say more than oh God, Jack!" He exclaimed, making me flinch. "You have a fucking fetus growing inside of you! Why the fuck am I just now finding out that you slept with someone?"

I sniffled, dramatically sliding from my place on the toilet to the cold tile floor beneath me. Wiping underneath my eyes, I tried to keep my breathing normal at the realization washing over me. Why I've been so tired. Why I've been agitated easier than normal. Why my stomach is weird. Why I feel so sick and tired lately. It's all explained now and I should've known as soon as it happened. I should've known after knowingly not using a condom.

"Jack-"

"You made me go to that stupid party!" I blurted, scooting over to lean on my bathtub. "You guys all left me! You left me and...and-"

"I left you for five minutes to flirt with Hailey and you said you'd be fine." He interrupted, squatting down next to me. "I didn't know you were gonna find a room with that...that fucking asshole that doesn't know how to use condoms apparently!"

I sniffled, pulling my knees up to my chest loosely to rest my chin. Sighing heavily, I ignored the water continuing to flow down my face and cringed at the regret swarming my gut. Regret for letting my best friend's peer pressure get to me. Regret for being my awkward anti-social self. Regret for lying to my mother. Regret for taking that first sip that lead to many more. Regret for letting myself do things without thinking them through.

"I didn't know this would happen, Jay." Parker whispered, wrapping his arm around my shoulders. "Honestly. I didn't-"

"Expect me to give my virginity to Alex fucking Gaskarth?" I whimpered, looking over to my shaking hands.

"Do you want me to get Cass? Or Lynn?" He asked softly, running his hand up and down my arm soothingly.

I sighed, leaning back into the cold bathtub behind me. I tightened my forearms over my knees, staring ahead into the white cupboards under the bathroom sink through my blurred vision. Slumping, I nodded my head lightly.

"I'll be right back." He promised, kissing the top of my head as he jumped to his feet. "Everything's going to be okay."

I sighed heavily, shaking my head to myself while he slipped through the cracked open door. How could he think everything is going to be okay? I'm seventeen years old and barely even done with half of senior year. I'm supposed to graduate with honors. I'm supposed to get a full-ride to college. I'm supposed to be focusing on homework and applications, not sleeping with guys at parties I'm not supposed to go to.

I jumped at the sound of footsteps pounding through the house, looking over to the bathroom door just in time for it to slam into the wall from getting shoved open so fast. Cassadee flew towards me, eyes wide in shock with Lynn hot on her heels. She brushed her hair behind her ears and grabbed the test from the sink before dropping to her knees in front of me.

"Holy shit, you weren't kidding!" She exclaimed, looking over me before turning her head towards Parker.

"Why would I joke about this?" He scoffed, closing the bathroom door behind him. "This is a fucking crisis, Cassadee! He's impregnated by that fucking bastard!"

"He's not so bad." I defended weakly, wiping at my cheeks.

"Yeah, he's just an asshole and kind of a whore." Lynn added, getting comfortable by my right side.

"Don't defend him. He used you." He frowned.

I rolled my eyes, heaving a sigh when my stomach flipped anxiously.

"Okay, pause." Cassadee instructed, forcing all of our attention on her. "How the hell did this even happen?"

"We all know how it fucking happened." Parker answered sarcastically from his side of the small room. "I left him on his own for two minutes and he got played."

"Obviously." Lynn retorted, wrapping her arm around my shoulders. "I didn't know you had it in you, Jacky. I didn't think you were into tattoos. Or piercings. Or Alex Gaskarth in general."

I scowled, feeling a new wave of stress wash over me at their comments. I knew they would think differently of me and I definitely didn't want them knowing I lost my virginity like this. I flinched, keeping my gaze glued to the purple hoodie blocking my view of the cupboards underneath my bathroom sink when the cool sensation of a wipe swiped over my chin. I let out a huff, not fighting the way the thick material scrubbed across my mouth as Cassadee felt the need to clean my face.

"Just take a deep breath." She cooed, dabbing at the corners of my lips one more time before she knelt back in front of me. "You're okay."

I sucked in a breath, shaking my head as I tucked my shaking hands in between my knees and chest. This doesn't even feel real. I can't believe this is actually happening to me.

"This is not okay." I stressed, running my hands through my hair. "I'm. Oh God, guys. My dad is going to kill me and my mom is going to be so pissed! I can't be pregnant at seventeen!"

"Jack, calm down." Lynn called, snapping me out of my panicking. "You're freaking out over no reason. This happens all the time. I can talk to Chelsea about getting you in?"

I licked my dry lips, furrowing my eyebrows together in annoyance. How can she tell me to calm down when I'm going through a real life crisis as Parker put it. I managed to get myself knocked up in my last year of high school! Nothing is going to be okay. How am I even going to get into college?

"I can't raise a baby." I blurted, running my hands over my face. "I can't do this!"

"Jack!" Lynn scolded, grabbing my wrists. "I said I'd get Chelsea to squeeze you in so stop panicking."

"Yes!" I choked out once it registered in my head, shooting my hands out to wrap around her forearm.

"Jack, you need to think about this." Cassadee suggested, brushing my bangs out of my eyes.

"He doesn't need to think about it." Parker argued, coming to my defense. "He needs to do what he needs to do-"

"You can't just get an abortion." She interrupted softly, running her fingers through my hair.

"I can't have a baby, Cass!" I hissed out, feeling my eyes sting once more. "Who knows what my parents would do to me if they knew! I'm supposed to be getting straight A's for college, not getting knocked up a party!"

"This is a life, Jack!" Cass exclaimed incredulously, moving to hover in front of me. "A life that isn't just your's to decide to throw away-"

"That fucking asshole obviously just wanted a fuck out of him." Parker stated, making my stomach drop. "It's obvious he won't care about it and this is Jack's decision. It's his body."

I frowned, feeling a small twinge of guilt hit me at the thought of just taking the easy way out. Swallowing hard, I crossed my arms back over my knees. Why am I feeling guilty about making this choice? Parker's right. It's not like he would care. He got what he wanted from me and hasn't talked to me sense. The more I think about it, the more it hurts because he really did just want to have fun with me and now I'm pregnant with his baby. A baby he wouldn't be around for, so why should I have to deal with it?

"I'm doing it." I whimpered out, ignoring Cassadee's look of disappointment while I turned towards Lynn. "Call her up."
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I bit my lip, tucking my hands in the long sleeves of Parker's grey Adidas hoodie. Sucking in a deep breath, I crossed my arms tightly over my chest and shuffled my feet just a few more inches over the dusty floor. My stomach flipped harshly due to the nerves bubbling in my gut and I shuddered, shaking my head and turning to go right back where I came from.

"Ah ah." Lynn scolded, holding on to my arms to hold me in place. "You want to do this, trust me."

"I'm scared." I admitted, letting out a quiet whimper when a bigger group of butterflies flopped around my insides.

Letting out a shaky breath, I let my gaze leave Lynn's and wonder around the waiting room. I gulped lightly, taking in at least ten girls and three boys that had to be round my age. Some of them had nervous boyfriends with them and other looked like they had supportive mothers.

"It's going to be fine." Lynn whispered, nudging me back towards the empty row of ugly green chairs I was originally heading towards.

I sighed heavily, feeling like a little bit of the weight lifted from my shoulders once I planted myself in the hard cushioned seat. Crossing my legs, I folded my hands over my knees and tried to relax the somersaults going on in my gut. Why am I so nervous?

"Really try to stop worrying, Jay." She cooed, rubbing her hand up my arm soothingly. "Chelsea said you won't feel anything."

I jumped, looking over to the golden brown door blocking our view from all of the different offices. A blonde haired guy walked out with his hands around his stomach and his head dropped down to face his feet, making him look even smaller. I frowned, a new wave of nerves rushing through me as he walked passed all of our nosey eyes as fast as he could. The bell above the door went of loudly, announcing his departure as he practically ran from the building and the shameful look to him had me feeling really uneasy. Am I going to feel like that?

"Jack Barakat."

I jumped again, not expecting to hear such a loud voice in the silent room. Swallowing thickly, I ignored the pat to my thigh and nodded slowly. Pressing my shaking lips together, I slid from the chair and took hold of Lynn's outstretched hand. I avoided eye contact with everyone in the room much like the blonde guy we just saw and kept my gaze on my converse as she led me through the door behind the nurse.

"Just follow the hall and turn left into room eight." The woman chirped from behind me once the door closed.

"Okay, thanks." Lynn told nicely, pulling me forward.

I gnawed at my cheek, watching the weird purple and dark green squares of the flat carpet blur together as we trailed down the hall. The weird color turned into white when I was suddenly turning into the small room on our left. I coughed, grimacing at the smell of plastic and cleaning supplies while I was ushered over to a green cot covered in annoyingly loud white paper. Cringing, I carefully sat down on it and swung my dangling feet anxiously.

"We just have to fill out your form and then she can do it." Lynn informed, scooting her plastic chair up to my side. "I'll hold your hand. It's just a shot and a pill."

I shuddered at the thought of the skinny needle pushing through my forearm, feeling a new grimace take over my face while I tried to calm my pounding heart.

"You're being too quiet. I mean, you're always quiet, but you're not even speaking." She noted, taking hold of my left hand. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

"Uh huh." I squeaked, clamping my fingers around her's a little harder than I meant to.

"Take a deep breath." She instructed.

I licked my lips, staring over at her while I inhaled deeply. I held it in for a second, relaxing my shoulders as I let it out just before there was a a knock on the door. I bit my lip, tensing up more than I was before when the door suddenly pushed open to reveal a tall blonde woman.

"Hello, Mr. Barakat. I'm Doctor Louise." She introduced, holding her free hand out to me.

I stared at her, taking a few seconds to get my hand to move towards her. I bit the inside of my lip, trying not to focus on the sticky feeling along my palm after she pulled away. Wiping my hand over my jeans, I went back to dangling my feet and squeezing Lynn's hand.

"Okay. So youre here today for an abortion, correct?" She questioned, sounding all stern and serious.

I gulped, slowly nodding my head. She looked me over before glancing back to her clipborad with a frown. I held my breath and looked over at Lynn curiously, hoping they can't tell how fast my heart is racing.

"Okay, Jack. Your birthday lets me know that you are only seventeen years old." She started, pulling my attention towards her.

"I-I. Yes." I confirmed, squeezing Lynn's hands tighter when Doctor Louise clicked her tongue.

"Being seventeen, you're still a minor." She started, tucking the clipboard under her arm. "As you're still a minor, I cannot do the procedure without parental or guardian permission and supervision."

"I can't have this baby." I panicked, feeling my heart drop into my stomach as I looked to Lynn with wide eyes.

"My sister is the secretary." Lynn reminded, furrowing her eyebrows. "Doesn't she count?"

"Considering I have no proof of her being the legal guardian of this young man, no." Doctor Louise frowned. "I'm sorry, but you can call and reschedule with one of your parents."

"No no no." I repeated, shaking my head. "I can't tell my parents-"

"I'm sorry, Jack." She apologized, holding her hand up. "I can't help you without your mom or dad."

I sighed heavily, feeling the corners of my eyes burn with a fresh set of tears. I bit my quivering lip, trying to hold everything in while I slipped off of the cot. Sniffling, I dropped Lynn's hand and tucked my hands into my pocket lazily.

"I'm really sorry, but you can come back with one of them." Doctor Louise reassured, patting my shoulder gently.

I nodded, waiting for her to pull the door open before I rushed out. I swallowed hard, keeping my gaze glued to my feet as I pushed the door to the waiting room back open. I bit my cheek, rushing out of the building and into the cold air. The wind hit my face, forcing the warm tears welling in my eyes to overflow from the force.

"I'm so sorry, Jack." Lynn called, pulling me towards her car.

I sniffed, unable to hold back the stifled sob forcing itself passed my lips.

"It's gonna be okay!" She tried, pulling me into a tight hug.

I shook my head, trying to look at her through my blurred vision while the cries continued tumbling from my dry mouth.

"They're gonna be so mad!" I managed to get out between hiccups.

"You don't know that for sure." She informed, rubbing my arms. "Your mom is a total sweetheart. C'mon, let's get you in the car."

I wiped my eyes, plopping down in the front seat once she opened the door for me. Whimpering, I rubbed my nose on my sleeve and buckled myself in as she walked around the car. Shaking my head, I wiped at my face again and slumped back in the seat.

"We should've brought Kelsey." She groaned, getting into her own seat.

"How would your fuck buddy have helped me?" I asked weakly.

"She could've acted like your mom." She informed. "You'd be amazed seeing what some make up and different clothes can do. It's too late now though.. The doctor knows how scared you looked when she said your mom has to know so I'm sure she'll ask for a license or something."

"This is just fucking great." I muttered, closing my sore eyes and leaning back into my seat in attempt to stop the sickness swirling in my stomach.

"Just calm down and we'll all come over with you to tell them tomorrow?" She suggested.

"Okay." I mumbled. "Maybe I'll have a better chance at living if there's enough witnesses."
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"I don't want to do this." I whined anxiously, picking at the crust of my jelly sandwich.

"Just walk the twenty feet to his table." Parker scoffed, obviously upset with this idea Cassadee pushed on to me five minutes ago.

"My mom doesn't even know who he is." I complained, lowering my voice. "She's not going to be able to tell his parents he got me pregnant."

"Your mom is crazy when she wants to be, Jack." Cass reminded, nudging my side. "Would you rather you tell him or him find out after you go through with it and get ups-"

"He's not going to be fucking upset, Cass. Get that through your thick head." Parker hissed out in annoyance across from us. "He doesn't even care about Jack's feelings. He fucking humped and dumped him. The only reason I'm kind of with you on this is because we all know how crazy Kate can be when she's upset-"

"And the last thing we want is for her to find a way to yell at him and have him yell at you or hurt you another way." Lynn finished, giving me a reassuring smile. "I guess Cass is right too. The father should know his kid is getting disintegrated before it happens."

"It's not getting disintegrated!" I gawked, holding my hand over my abdomen when my stomach cramped. "It's not even a thing yet."

"Yeah and he's not burning it you idiot." Parker snapped, nudging her elbow.

"I said disintegrated." She spat, nudging him back just as hard. "Incinerated means burning, idiot."

I raised my eyebrows at their bickering, coming back to reality when Cassadee poked at my side some more. I groaned, cringing at the nervous butterflies floating around worse than yesterday.

"I can't just randomly go up to him." I insisted, biting my lip at her unimpressed look.

"Yes you can. Go on." She pushed. "Do you want me to go with you?"

"No." I refused quickly, biting my lip at the hurt flashing in her eyes. "It's just. I'm going to feel awkward enough asking him if we can talk. Having you there would make me feel more weird."

"It's okay." She smiled, squeezing my exposed forearm lightly. "Go now. Before lunch is over."

I gulped, pushing my paper bag away from me anxiously before tugging at my Good Charlotte t-shirt. Licking my lips, I took another sip of my strawberry lemonade and nodded to myself. I bit my cheek, letting my gaze catch on a long table towards the back of the cafeteria. My eyes immediately found Alex and I felt my heart skip at the wide smile taking over his face as he laughed. Swallowing my nerves, I slowly pushed myself out of my seat and crossed my arms over my chest self-consciously.

"You can do it." Lynn cheered, nudging my hip after I stepped passed her.

I nodded, pressing my fingers into the crease of my elbows as I made my way down the busy lunchroom. Blinking slowly, I tried not to stare as I got closer. As soon as he came into view more close up, I felt the scowl returning to my face when I noticed the blonde girl sitting over his lap. She twirled her hair, giggling at whatever the small crowd was talking about while she used her other hand to fiddle with his snapback. I sucked in a quick breath, feeling my fingers shake when I reached the end of the table. I cleared my throat, immediately catching almost everyone's attention.

"Yo." Alex greeted, nodding his head at me with an eyebrow raised.

"Um." I mumbled, digging my nails into my skin to hide my pathetic shaking. "Can we like...talk?"

I rolled my lips together, my heart leaping in my throat when the girls around me gave me dirty looks from their places around this side of the table. Swallowing thickly, I focused back on Alex and tried to keep my face from heating up at the confused look he gave me.

"I really need to talk to you." I rambled, biting my lip. "Like, alone."

I blinked, biting my lip harder at the smirk taking over his confusion. Clearing his throat, he nudged the girl right off of his lap and into the free seat beside him carelessly before he stood up.

"Lead the way." He winked, brushing his dark grey hoodie off.

I blushed, ignoring everyone around us as I turned around. Once I was facing away from him, I covered my cheeks with my cool hands and walked towards the nearest exit as fast as I could. Once I was in the hall, I sighed with a little bit of relief knowing everyone wasn't staring at me anymore but the stress came back when I realized what I just did.

"Okay." I started, turning around and stopping when his finger pressed into my lips.

I leaned back, a little taken aback from the intense stare he gave me. He stepped closer, drawing my eyes the silver hoop through his left nostril before my gaze dropped to his lips.

"Maybe we should go somewhere more private?" He suggested, removing his finger.

"Um. Okay?" I agreed slowly, crossing my arms back over my chest once he turned his back to me.

I trailed behind him, trying to keep my gaze up on the back of his head. After staring at the black patch of hair over the back of his neck, my eyes fell down to his bold shoulders before traveling down his thin back and to his sagging black joggers. I bit my lip, looking away from the dark blue boxers poking out. I glanced up just in time to catch a glimpse of him stopping before I was shoved to the side. I gasped, reaching my arms out only to smack them into his chest when darkness filled my vision.

"What-" I stopped, gasping when his warm lips slotted between mine.

I opened my eyes, blinking to adjust them in the darker area while I shoved at his hard chest gently.

"What are you doing?" I breathed incredulously, looking around the crammed space we're in.

My eyes caught a string causing me to reach out and pull on it out of instinct. Light flooded the dark room and I felt my eyes widen more when I saw all of the cleaning supplies along the tall shelf to my right.

"Sh." He hushed, pressing my back against the cold wall while his warm fingers slipped up the hem of my t-shirt.

I gasped, feeling warmth spread through my body just like it did that night at the party. I gulped, looking up into his brown eyes to find him staring back down at me with that smirk that got me into this trouble in the first place. I shook my head, trying not to think of the feelings filling me from the touch of his hands and trying not to look down at the way the sweats clung to his long legs or the way his hoodie clings to his muscular inked arms or how he's actually looking at me like this and not that blonde bimbo from two minutes ago-

"Wait." I blurted, turning my head just as his lips brushed mine again. "I need to talk to you-"

"Uh huh." He interrupted, slipping his hands from my hips to underneath my thighs.

I choked out a breath, grabbing on to his shoulders when he hoisted me up effortlessly. I bit my lip, closing my eyes when his lips brushed along my neck. His hands wrapped my legs around his hips tightly, forcing me to rub up against him. I moaned in surprise, knocking the hat right off of his head when he nipped at sensitive skin.

"Alex." I called, cursing the butterflies filling me at the new sensations he's showing me.

"Let me take care of you, baby." He rasped, slipping his hands back to my ass.

"We need to-oh." I moaned, clutching the back of his hoodie.

"You're talking too much." He chuckled deeply, nudging my nose with his.

I opened my mouth to protest only for him to slip his tongue inside without warning. I gasped, twitching nervously when he deepened the kiss. I awkwardly licked at his tongue back, unsure of what to really do now that I'm sober. Taking a chance, I wrapped my arms around his neck and copied his actions of smacking our lips together the best I could a few more times before I pulled away from him. Heavy breathing filled the room and I felt my gut clench at the way he panted against my mouth while he pressed himself into me harder.

"A-Alex." I tried, gripping his shoulders tightly.

"Jack." He breathed into my ear, making my eyes go wide.

"You know my name?" I gawked, clearing my throat awkwardly when he pulled back enough to raise his eyebrow at me.

"How could I forget someone that screams my name as sexy as you do?" He quirked, brushing his lips against mine teasingly. "You sure can work those hips."

I blushed harder, trying to ignore the warmth flooding my gut from all of the touches and closeness. Swallowing thickly, I forced my legs from around his waist and pushed him back a little. Once my feet were back on the ground, I pushed him another step back and focused on fixing the hem of my t-shirt while silence fell between us.

"We're not doing much talking." He teased, leaning down.

"Oh my God." I exclaimed in realization, heat creeping up my neck while I covered my cheeks. "I actually need to talk to you. I'm not. Talking isn't code for sex, Alex."

"Uh." He stopped, pressing his hands into the wall beside my head while he frowned down at me. "You're not try'na hook up?"

"No." I said slowly, biting my cheek when he scoffed.

"Then what the fuck are we doing in a closet?" He asked.

"I don't know." I shrugged, crossing my arms back over my chest as the nerves uneasy nerves returned. "You pushed me in here."

"I thought you were down to get off with me the way you were shoving your tongue down my throat." He pouted, pressing his hands back into my hips.

"I'm not trying to get off with you." I admitted softy, fighting to drop my gaze from his. "I'm um. I'm like. I brought you in the hall to tell you that I'm pregnant."

I closed my eyes and held my breath in, bracing myself for anything he could throw my way.

"Uh. Congratulations?" He mumbled, slowly pulling his hands from my hips.

"Congratulations?" I repeated, looking up at him in shock.

"Yeah." He nodded unsurely, scrunching his face up. "What are you telling me for?"

I pressed my lips together, staring up at him incredulously. Did I just hear him right? Or is he really that stupid?

"I'm not stupid." He scoffed, taking another step back while another blush coated my cheeks. "You're fucking stupid try'na get with me when-"

"I'm knocked up by you, Jackass." I retorted boldly.

Notes

Very little introduction to Alex, but there will be plenty more of him from now on!

Also, there was kind of a lot of dialogue in this chapter, but I promise there will be ore details of Jack's feelings and such in the other chapters!