I'm out of sight, I'm out of mind
I'll do it all for you in time
And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now

The next few months were absolute chaos. Between recording an album, planning a wedding, and trying to spend as much time with Jack as I could before our separate tours began, well let’s just say it was a miracle I survived, I was that exhausted every night.

And only some of that exhaustion came from sex, thank you very much.

Midnight’s sophomore album, Going to Hell, came together relatively smoothly, and before we knew what hit us, it was getting dangerously close to the Save Rock and Roll tour. This couldn’t have made our record label happier, given that it was perfect timing to promote the new album and thus, a wave of press unlike we’d ever seen rose upon us poor unsuspecting souls.

Don’t get me wrong, we’d done press before. Tons of it. But the second word got around that we were one of three bands on Fall Out Boy’s comeback tour, well radio stations, magazines, and even a few news stations wanted to hear all about us.

It was a bit unnerving to me, but I tried to put on a sturdy front as best I could. This was what I signed us up for, after all. The sudden attention to an otherwise overlooked band (other than our own lovely alternative rock community) was going to take some getting used to, even if said attention only came because we were touring with a super famous band that everyone and their uncle knew.

I just hoped we could grab their attention long enough for some of those people to remember our names and music, too. After all, I could only remember a handful of opening acts I’d seen as my years as a concert goer, and I really didn’t want Midnight to fall into the trap of being known as ‘that one band from that one show’. We had to be memorable.

Thus, our album cover came into play.

Initially, I was on team ‘less is more’ with the look of the album itself--you know, maybe picture a hot burning flame with a stark black background, and the title Going to Hell seemed pretty on point. At least, that was my thinking.

The rest of the band though, was hoping for a bit more. After all, simple was how our last album cover had been, and though we were all immensely proud of our work, it didn’t exactly get the sales we were hoping for. Like it or not, we needed good sales this time to prove our worth on our new label.

Then Jo--of course it was her--suggested bringing out the visual imagery of sex given the sexual nature of our songs. I rolled my eyes, still a bit annoyed over the last time I’d listened to her and her suggestions about sex lately, thinking maybe she’d hit a dry patch in her own love life and thus the constant discussion of it.

Problem was, I was quickly outnumbered as the rest of the guys were all for having a sexy cover to get people’s attention.

Men.

And of course, when it came time to design this sexy album cover, it was soon decided that the lead singer (me) should be on the cover in something skimpy--or more specifically, hardly anything at all, as the only thing covering my figure would be our band’s logo, a cross with an arrow pointing down below.

I protested at first, insisting that I was far from cover worthy--that Jo would fit this skimpy image much better if they actually wanted people to go for it. I had scars, after all. Scars that sure, I wasn’t as self conscious about as I had been in the past, but still made me feel uncomfortable in my own skin at times.

“That’s exactly why you should do it, Chris.” Mark pressed, eager to make me see what the rest of the band had already unanimously agreed on. “Don’t you see? If girls who listen to us see you on the front of our album, shamelessly showing off your scars for the world to see, don’t you think they’ll see that maybe they won’t be so shameful of their own scars?”

“There are a lot of body image issues going around lately. It would be nice for our fans to see you in that light, because face it, you own whatever room you walk in, Chris.” Jo added with a wink. “And I’m not going to go any further than that.”

I pressed my lips, my heart pounding at the idea of me being near naked on our album cover for all to see, flaws and all. Was I really willing to do that?

Before I made too rash of a decision and go in for fight number two, I shook my head and sighed, “I really think I should talk to Jack about this.”

To their credit, the band didn’t seem shocked by this response. “Fine, ask him.” Jo rolled her eyes. “But he’s totally going to agree with us.”

I tilted my head. “You think so?”

“He’s your man and he thinks your hot as fuck. Of course he is.”

Turns out, she wasn’t so off course.

When I told Jack of Jo’s idea, he was oddly supportive. “Maybe she’s onto something, babe.”

My eyes widened, taken aback by Jack’s not-so-negative response. “What, now?”

He shrugged, glancing down at the floor sheepishly for a beat before admitting, “I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’d love it if I was the only guy from now on to see you with so little on, but you’re talking about a nearly naked cover, right? You’re not going fully au naturel, right?”

I raised a brow. “I didn’t realize there was such a defining difference between nude and nearly nude with you.” I shook my head for a second, my mind remembering this was Jack I was talking to here. Nudity wasn’t exactly something he was shy about. I just never expected he’d be so okay with his wife being as open with her body as he was. “Are you sure you’d be okay with it? I mean, there’s still a lot that’d be there for all to see...” I motioned towards my torso and cringed at the fact I was even considering showing off so much skin.

He smirked, taking the hand I’d let hang to my side and letting our fingers intertwine. “I just think it could be good for you.”

“Good for me.” I repeated carefully, watching him with careful eyes.

“Yeah, you know. Get your confidence back and everything.”

I frowned, going on the offensive despite knowing that he had a point. “I still have my confidence.”

“Babe...”

“I do!” I stubbornly countered. “Weren’t you just talking about how confident I sounded on the demos I shared with you--”

“And you did, I promise. But, you’ve gotta admit, Sally, your body confidence hasn’t been the same since the accident.”

I opened my mouth to protest some more, but Jack held up a hand.

“Most of the time, you’re great with the confidence and everything is totally normal, but every now and then I’ve seen the way you look at yourself in the mirror all critically.”

“I’m not allowed to be critical?” I scrunched up my nose. “What’s wrong with wishing a curve was a bit less curvy or dreaming that a...a scar completely disappeared--”

“See! Right there!” Jack pointed at me, smiling widely at the fact that he was totally right. “That’s why you should do the cover. Show off to the world how beautiful and sexy you really are, and prove once and for all that those scars don’t bother you.”

I stared at him for a second. Was he serious?

“I don’t know, Jack...” I shook my head, unsure of what to do. Everyone I talked to was so convinced I’d be perfect for this crazy idea of Jo’s, but I didn’t see it. “Why me? Why not Jo, or hell, a random model?”

“Trust me, it’d be perfect for you. You need to realize that you’re still the gorgeous woman I fell in love with.”

I shook my head. “I know you’ve always thought that, babe, but all I’m saying is maybe I’m not so beautiful that I could confidently pull off being the model for our album cover.”

“Trust me, you can. And if you need references I can totally call Alex and Zack and whoever else it takes for you to see what I see.”

I pursed my lips, my heart beating steadily in my chest as I found my refusal to do such an insane thing was slowly diminishing despite feeling scared shitless. “You’re sweet.” I muttered, leaning forward to kiss him softly. As I pulled apart, I met Jack’s bright gaze. “You sure I should do this?” I eyed him carefully, letting the corner of my lips curl up as I added, “You won’t get jealous?”

“Hey, as long as I’m the one you always come home to, I’m totally on board.” He shot back with a wink, “You’re gonna rock.”

So it was decided.

I told the band later that day that I would be the model for our new album before I could completely freak out over it. After all, bearing all was no easy task, body confidence issues or not. But, I sucked it up and within a week I found myself in a photoshoot wearing nothing but the weirdest pasties ever all while trying hard to pull off that ‘sexy’ thing everyone around me was convinced I was worthy enough of portraying on a freaking album cover for the world to see.

It took a few tries, but once Jack stopped by for moral support, all I could do was focus on him. The second he walked in, his eyes grew dark, mouth slightly ajar as his gaze screamed of lust. I watched as he licked his lips slightly, smirking at me when our eyes met.

‘Hot.’ He mouthed.

I smiled back, grateful that for the most part, the photographer was shooting from the neck below. We’d decided to try both front and back angles, as I not only had those God awful pasties on, but our band’s logo painted on my back as well.

“Uh, okay Chris. I think I’ve got enough on this side...wanna turn around so we can shoot you from behind?”

I grimaced, never picturing in my wildest dreams of hearing that sentence directed at me. I shot a glance over at Jack, who looked to be seconds away from bursting out in laughter. The dirty undertones of the question didn’t go over his head either, apparently.

Silently I nodded, repositioning myself on the black stool I’d been on for the last ten minutes so my back was now turned to the miniature audience of band members, photography team, managers and, of course, Jack.

As soon as I did, I heard a cat call emerge from behind me. “Damn, nice ass, Chris!” I heard Landon’s cheery voice tease in jest. His voice lowered slightly as I could only imagine he nudged Jack. “You’re one lucky dude, dude.”

Jack chuckled. “Don’t I know it. And remember, you can all look, but no touching. That’s my job.”

“If anyone touches my ass right now, including you, babe, I’ll slap them silly.” I shot back, only slightly joking. “I’m nervous enough as it is over here...”

His warm laugh followed, probably expecting I’d respond that way after agreeing to such a revealing photoshoot in the first place. I, unlike him, wasn’t known for flaunting my bare body after a drink or two. “Fair enough.”

I followed the directions I was given by the photographer, twisting my body left and right so certain angles were brought to the stark artificial lighting in the studio, a sharp contrast to the grey, almost black backdrop I was currently staring at.

“Beautiful.” The photographer praised as he snapped a few more pictures. “Great job, Chris. I think I’ve got enough to work with.”

I nodded gratefully, eagerly grabbing the robe Jack had taken from the wardrobe assistant to hand to me. I quickly wrapped myself tightly into the white terry fabric, my heart feeling only slightly calmer now that I was no longer exposed. And sure, I did feel substantially more confident about my body than I had beforehand, but I was still grateful to be done with the whole thing, being a good body image spokesperson or not. Despite this, I grinned warmly at the man in front of me. “Thanks for coming, Jack.” I kissed him softly, not giving a damn about any sort of show we might be giving our friends.

“Of course, Sally.” He smirked into the kiss before pulling away, nodding towards the small crew our record company had hired for the photoshoot. “Had to make sure everyone was behaving and not making advances towards my girl, right?”

I raised a brow. “Oh. So you came because you wanted to stake your claim?”

He shook his head, leaning closer towards me so I was the only one who could hear. “No. I came to support my beautiful wife and to make sure no creeps hit on you.”

I laughed, walking with Jack back towards the dressing room, our hands effortlessly falling together like puzzle pieces. “Well I appreciate that, babe.”

"And I was right, right? About this photoshoot being good for you?"

I shrugged, mysterious. "Maybe."

"I was." Jack smiled confidently. "I could tell from the way you were posing that you were getting into it."

I smiled back. "Maybe a little. I mean, once I got over everyone seeing me so exposed like that, and how they didn't care that I had a few scars here and there...well I kinda started feeling as sexy as you make me feel when I'm with you."

His grin only widened. "Told you you were sexy enough for the cover."

I ignored him, instead letting the sounds of the crew putting things away fill the void as we enjoyed the walk back to the dressing room.

We continued our slow pace for a second or two before Jack cleared his throat. “Actually, I also stopped by hoping you’d want to come with me back to Alex’s apartment downtown.”

I glanced up at my husband, slightly perplexed. Though I was friends with Alex, I hardly went over to his place unless he’d invited me and Jack for night out or something. “Why’s that?”

He smiled widely. “Well, we’ve met some nice kids, just starting out in the music business. They’re big fans of ours, actually--”

“They’re All Time Low fans? That’s already a plus in my book.” I smiled, always a fan of the band at heart, no matter how well I knew the guys and all their deep dark secrets.

Jack nodded. “It’s kinda weird, you know, being on the receiving end of that sort of thing, but yeah. These kids grew up obsessing to be like our band and anyway, they got signed a year ago and went on this huge tour out of the gate with nothing but an EP, and now they’re working on their full studio album and are kinda freaking out about everything that’s riding on it.”

“...so that’s where we come in?” I furrowed my brows, unsure how I would be involved in such a task. After all, I was only now on the cusp of beginning my first major tour. I could only imagine what I could help these boys out with.

“Well more precisely, that’s where Alex comes in. He’s helping a few of the guys write songs, and ‘lex invited us for inspiration and help if we feel up to the task.”

I tilted my head, eying Jack carefully. “That sounds great and all, but why do I have a feeling that there’s something you’re not telling me?”

He winced. “Okay so they obviously know that you and I are together, and when they heard I’d be tagging along, they were kinda hoping you’d do a duet with them--”

I stopped him right there. “Another duet? Am I really getting in demand? First Fall Out Boy and now these guys?” I joked, though honestly feeling flattered that the young boys from this up and coming band liked me as much as they liked the boys from All Time Low.

“I knew it was only a matter of time.” Jack smirked. “My girl’s got talent!”

I rolled my eyes. “Not that I don’t appreciate you bragging about me, but please don’t tell me you already said I was in? I’m sure they’re great and everything, but I do have a three month tour coming up in less than a week. Gotta save those pipes, you know?”

He slowly nodded, hesitant. “...I know, Sally, but you should’ve seen the look on their faces when I surprised them at that breakfast meeting the other day with Alex. They are our biggest fans and I couldn’t let them down like that.”

I sighed, feeling bad for the boys. They didn’t do anything wrong and it wasn’t like I wouldn’t/didn’t do the same thing when I was in their shoes. I pursed my lips, thinking of a solution. that would get me out of this pickle. “I...I guess I can stop by and hang for a bit. But how about this? What if Jo does the duet they have planned instead?”

Jack stopped mid-stride. “Jo? ‘Sings like Jewel’, Jo?”

I shrugged. “If they love Midnight’s music, I don’t see why they would mind the change in plans. Plus, Jo’s been sharing a bunch of demos with me that she wrote while I was out and her voice has matured, Jack. I mean, it’s not rough around the edges rock worthy, but trust me, I think everyone’s been underestimating Jo’s vocal abilities.”

Jack stared at me for a second, taking in my suggestion with hesitant eyes. “...I guess, I mean, it’s up to the boys anyway. I’m just tagging along for the fun of it. Just make sure Jo’s onboard with it before we leave.”

I nodded., glad we could come up with a plan, at least. “Sure, but why the rush?”

“Oh, we’re leaving in five minutes.” Jack smirked, glancing at his phone to reply to who I assumed to be Alex or one of the boys in the band.

I glared at him. “Five minutes! Why the hell didn’t you tell me about this sooner?”

“It was spur of the moment, okay?” Jack’s shoulders deflated, slightly. “Plus, I wanted it to be a surprise.”

“Well, then I guess that part worked. Just...let me get changed and you tell Jo, alright? Consider it punishment for making me rush out of here with zero notice.” I glanced down under my robe for a second, grimacing at the thought of removing those damn pasties in five minutes. Not wanting to lose a layer or two of skin in a very sensitive area, I wondered if it’d hurt to leave them on for a few more hours under my regular clothes, but feared about the glue getting even more stuck to my skin. I glanced back up at Jack. “If I lose skin because of you, no touching my boobs until they heal, alright?”

He sighed. “I guess that’s only fair.”

“Glad we’re on the same page. Now go find Jo and meet me back here so we can go meet these kids that admire you and Alex, for some reason.” I smirked, winking at my husband as he frowned at my joke.

Jack scrunched up his nose. “What? We’re totally admirable.”

I just laughed. “Yeah, keep telling yourselves that.”

Notes

Opening lyrics are from "Lego House" by Ed Sheeran. This is mostly filler, but a long filler, if that helps? Enjoy!