Brook-

After my talk outside with Matt I managed to compose myself enough to go back on the bus and convince everyone that I was a mostly sane personal.

Jack well deservingly and very obviously kept his distance from me and it made me feel terrible. I was stressed out and scared out of my mind but that was no excuse for me to take it out on him like I had.

I don't know what it is about Jack and his little nuisances that on a normal basis just make me giggle but in my new found state of insanity, almost everything he said or did made me snap. I think it's because deep down I know no matter how bad I snapped on him, he'd never completely take it serious and eventually forgive me. That's just how Jack was but it wasn't fair to do to him.

Alex seemed worried but I was able to ease his mind for the time being. I told him I was just super tired and very cranky and he of all people would know I had spent the last few nights tossing and turning.

I went through the motions throughout the rest of the day. I followed the guys around from their main stage set to their acoustic set and snuck off with Emily to watch Yellowcard while the guys did a signing.

I wanted to tell her everything that was going on with me. I wanted to have another girl around to tell me that I was crazy and there was enough against me to say I wasn't pregnant than there was to say I was pregnant.

Really, I just wanted someone to tell me it was going to be okay. I wanted that someone to be my boyfriend but I had to find the nerve to tell him first. By the end of Yellowcard's set I had somehow convinced myself that I was going to tell Alex tonight. We would be in a hotel room alone and I would be able to tell him everything with no interruptions.
*****

"So, are you sure you're okay?" Alex asked me as soon as we got inside our hotel room for the night. "You've been kind of quiet today. Well, minus when you were screaming at Jack," he added chuckling at the end of his sentence in an attempt to lighten the mood.

I cracked a smile, flopping my suitcase down on the bed.

"I told you, I'm just tired," I assured him, starting to get cold feet as I dug through my suitcase for pajamas.

"Okay," he said, coming up behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist, causing me to jump slightly when his hands brushed my stomach.

He paused for a second, probably gauging whether or not he wanted to mention my jump.

"I'll be right back," I mumbled, spinning around in his arms and kissing his cheek before taking my stuff with me to the bathroom.

I hopped in the shower and admittedly took my time in there, washing my hair twice and thoroughly shaving my legs. I tried rehearsing in my head what I was going to say to Alex but no matter how long I did that, I knew I would never be fully prepared.

After way more than enough time passed, I exited the bathroom, finding Alex sitting Indian style on top of the bed in his pajamas playing around with the TV remote.

"Hey," he looked up at me with a smile.

"We need to talk," I blurted out.

"Yeah,” he surprisingly nodded in agreement. "We do."

I took a deep breath and climbed up on the bed with my boyfriend. I sat against the headboard, bringing my knees up to my chest and wrapping my arms around them.

"Look, I-" I started.

"Can I go first?" Alex interrupted. "I think I know what this is about actually.”

"You do?" I asked, my eyes widening.

Alex nodded. "I understand that you're freaking out about this but it's not a big deal. I promise, it's not going to influence me to pressure you into marriage or anything," Alex said, sounding relatively calm.

I blinked a few times, a little shocked. "So, you're just okay with this? Like, it's not life changing or anything?"

Alex laughed. "I hardly think this is life changing. It happens all the time." I nodded slowly.

"I suppose you're right. But right now we're talking about us. It's a big deal, Alex. Huge even."

"Brook," Alex tilted his head to the side. "Come on. It isn't that serious. Jack feels terrible. Can't we just move on?"

"Jack knows?" I gasped and Alex raised an eyebrow at me.

"Of course he does. He did it. Remember?"

"Alex,” I sighed. "I don't think we're talking about the same thing."

"I'm starting to see that." Alex said slowly. "What are you talking about?"

I shook my head. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about the picture Jack posted of you and me with that stupid comment."

I looked at him for a second, trying to remember what he was talking about.

"Wait." It suddenly dawned on me. "You think I've been acting like this because Jack posted a cute picture of us with an ever cuter comment?"

He nodded slowly. "He mentioned marriage..."

I cracked a tiny smile. "And you thought that because Jack said we should get married that I thought you thought that too?"

He nodded slowly, looking a little embarrassed. "I guess I was wrong."

"So wrong!" I assured him, squeezing his arm lightly. "I love how much Jack supports our relationship. I thought it was so cute he posted that."

"Oh. Okay. Good!" Alex smiled, leaning over and kissing me gently. "So, what's up?" he asked.

I froze for a moment. He looked so incredibly relieved that I wasn't freaked out by this silly marriage thing that this possible pregnancy thing was going to completely break his heart.

"Brook? What's wrong?" he asked, panic taking over his voice when I burst into tears.

"I-I don't know how to tell you this," I cried, my voice cracking between each sob.

"Babe, what is it?" he asked, soothingly rubbing circles on my back.

I looked away from him, unable to see his face when I told him what I needed to.

"I think I might be pregnant."

Almost an entire minute passed where Alex didn't say a word. If it wasn't for the fact that his hand dropped from my back, I would think he didn't even hear me.

"What?" was all he said when he found his voice.

"I think I might be-"

He held up his hand to silence me before I could finish my sentence.

"How?" was his next question.

I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself enough so I could actually speak clearly.

"Remember when I got sick after Hawaii and was on those antibiotics?"

“Yeah,” he nodded. "I know antibiotics cancel out birth control. I bought condoms, remember?"

I nodded. "Yes. But right after I was put on the antibiotics, I changed my birth control. I think there’s a chance my body wasn't used to everything by the time we stopped using the condoms."

I made the mistake of looking up at Alex. There was a lot going on behind his eyes. A lot of worry and a lot of fear. It was killing me.

"You said that you might be pregnant. Why did you say might?"

"Because I don’t know one hundred percent. I took two tests a few days ago after I was officially over a week late. One said positive and the other said negative."

"The other day? You've been dealing with this for a few days?" he asked shocked.

I shrugged. "About a week really."

"Jesus Christ, Brook," he gasped. "Why didn't you say anything sooner!"

Before I could reply, Alex just shook his head before walking away from me. I tried my best not to freak out. I had to put myself in his shoes and realize he may have needed a minute or two digest the information I’d just given him.

After a little while passed and Alex didn’t come back, I stood from the bed and followed him out on the balcony where I found him staring blankly ahead at the parking lot.

I didn’t say anything but he must have sensed that I was standing next to him because he spoke without every looking at me.

"A week,” he repeated. “I can’t believe you were dealing with this for over a week and didn’t say anything. I thought we promised to be honest with each other about everything."

A weird sense of relief came over me when I realized he was more mad at me for not telling him and not just the fact that I could possibly be pregnant.

"I didn't want to freak you out over nothing. I thought I could handle it but clearly my behavior lately says otherwise," I admitted, grasping the balcony banister in front of me and looking over the parking lot myself.

Alex let out a loud sigh and put his hand over mine and squeezed it lightly.

"What do we do next?" he asked.

I shrugged, my eyes welling up with tears again. "We find out for sure."

Alex nodded. "And how do we do that?"

"Matt's going to find us a doctor in the area tomorrow since it's a day off."

"Matt knows?"

"He figured it out," I nodded. "He called me out this morning after he stopped me from almost murdering Jack."

"Okay," Alex nodded.

I turned my body a bit to face him. "How are you being so calm right now?"

He shook his head. "I'm not calm. Believe me. I'm just not sure what good freaking out will do. I think I may be in a bit of shock."

"I'm sorry," I looked away again. "I understand if this changes your mind about things"

"Changes my mind on what things?"

I shrugged, tears slipping onto my cheeks. "About me. About us. I know how crazy your schedule is over the rest of the year and if I am really am pregnant-"


"Whoa. Whoa. Whoa..." he said, waving his arms around. "You think I'm just going to leave you because of this?"

"I don't... I don't know," I said quietly.

"After everything we have been through, you just think I would bail when you would need me the most?"

"I hoped not. It's just a baby is a big deal, Alex."

"No shit, Brook,” he exclaimed, tossing his arms in the air and storming away from me and back inside our room.

I quickly followed him this time.

"Alex…”

"You actually thought that I would leave you to do this alone?" he snapped.

"I don't want to hold you back, Alex," I cried.

"This is going to ruin everything you've been working towards."

He shook his head, pacing the room and tossing his arms up in the air again in frustration.

"Don't you think I deserve the right to decide that or not? I can't believe that's the kind of guy you think I am."

"It's not be guy I think you are. Not even close. Obviously I'm not thinking entirely clear and I was so afraid of doing this alone that I had to prepare myself for the possibility"

"Well, forget it. Because it's not happening. Do you understand me, Brook? I don't care if we go to the doctor tomorrow and they say there are seven fucking babies in there, I'm not going anywhere!" he was almost yelling at me, making me realize how badly I'd hurt his feelings.

I nodded, dropping back down on the bed and looking up at him slowly.

"I'm sorry," I whispered and his demeanor softened considerably before he sat back on the bed and wrapped his arms around me in a tight hug.


"It's going to be okay, Brook. I love you and I promise we will get through this."

Alex-

My brain had been running close to a thousand miles a minute once Brook confessed that she might be pregnant. I was terrified at the thought.

Absolutely scared to fucking death.

What the hell did I know about pregnancy and raising a child? Not a damn thing.

I did know that I love my girlfriend and she needed me now more than ever. I couldn't let Brook see how freaked out I really was. It wouldn't do either one of us any good.

"I'm so scared, Alex," Brook whispered, looking up at me through her tears. "I don't know if I can do this."

"Hey," I said softly, trying to compose myself and find the best encouraging words for her. "We don't even know if we have to do this yet, remember?"

She nodded slowly and I wiped some of her tears off her face with my thumb.

"We'll go to the doctor tomorrow and find out for sure then. After, if there is something that we need to worry about, we will worry then. For now let's just calm down and try and get some sleep, okay?"

She scoffed, giving me a look like I was crazy. "Sleep?"

"Yes. I really think you really need it," I told her, wrapping my arms around her waist and inching her body back a bit so she was at the head of the bed again.

"Okay," she said sleepily as she laid back and attempted to make herself comfortable.

I barely rested my head on the pillow before she was darting back up again and shaking her head furiously.

"Alex, what if I am pregnant? What are we going to do? What if it's twins? What if it's triplets? What if it's three boys and I'm stuck at home with them while you're on the road? I can't handle that on my own. I can't-"

"Brook, you're going to make yourself sick. Please calm down," I begged her, sitting up and reaching for her hand. "I know it's sort of your thing to over think and over analyze every situation until you've come up with a proper solution to each, but that's not going to help you here. Please, please, please try to relax, okay?"

She took a few deep breaths and I brushed some hair off her face.

"Okay. I'll try."

"Thank you," I smiled slightly before pressing a kiss to her forehead.

I laid back down and Brook moved with me, immediately pressing herself into my side and resting her head on my shoulder. I wrapped my arms around her and gently ran a finger up and down her arm. I'd learned over the passed months that this simple gesture was enough to almost immediately put her to sleep.

"Alex," Brook's voice sounded so small and so soft.

"Yeah?"

"Can you sing to me?"

She had requested me to sing to her in bed a handful of times and each time I bashfully denied her for my own lame insecurities. But there was something about tonight and the way she asked that I just could not say no.

"Okay," I said softly, kissing the top of her head gently to buy myself a couple of more seconds to figure out what song to sing. Then it came to me.

I'll be there for you
These five words I swear to you
When you breath, I want to be the air for you
I'll be there for you I'd live and I'd die for you
I'd steal the sun from the sky for you
Words can't say what love can do
I'll be there for you...
***

Notes

Story Title: Taylor Swift - Sparks Fly
Chapter Title: Rihanna - Umbrella


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