“Pull me close now, like a candle in the rain. I will surrender to you again.”

It was funny, really.

It was funny how Cassadee was overthinking everything now. Time and time again, she had caught herself thinking about Rian and had to almost forcefully stop herself from thinking about him. His face. His smile. His will to try and get close to her even though she was actively avoiding – or so said rejecting – him.

But why was she rejecting him so much?

Seriously, why?

Previously, she had suspected that it was because when he first kissed her, he was just newly single from a relationship. And Cassadee hated that she kept coming back to this, but she couldn’t get over the fact that it could have been a rebound kiss. Maybe it wasn’t…but maybe it was.

But that was a long time ago. She shouldn’t still be dwelling on that.

But no, she had to. Because she had successfully spent an entire night with him, naked, and only remembered pieces of it. But she knew how it felt. She knew that it was something that made her feel complete in some way. And before she thought that it was the momentary fulfillment of sex, she surpassed that thought. Somehow, she knew it was more than that.
Maybe that was why she was constantly rejecting him. Maybe it scared her.

But she didn’t think about that. She pushed that thought away, deciding that it was entirely too crazy to consider that whatever they had was more than a few kisses and a great night.

All in all, she concluded that it must have been her love for her career that kept her from Rian or any boy. Surely, that was it. She wanted to succeed in her music and band. Maybe a relationship would just hold her back.

But it was still funny because even though she had concluded this and was hopeful that her brain would accept that and calm down, she currently had her phone out with a text written to send to him.

It wasn’t anything crazy. But she knew after this week of trying to avoid him, and that very heart jolting moment that happened in the club, she knew that she needed to talk about it with him. Maybe it wouldn’t be awkward.

She then had a slight panic before sending the message, and decided to hold her breath as if it would help. Quickly, she hit the send button and threw her phone on the bed like it was on fire.
Thankfully, Bridget was asleep and Cassadee didn’t have to face her constant questions and smirking. It was one in the morning and the night after a huge show; if you weren’t partying, you were asleep.

That’s exactly what Rian asked her when he texted back. Cassadee took a calming breath before glancing at the message.

Pope, it read, you know that it’s really late. How are you not asleep?

She could ask him the same, but decided not to.

Dawson, I want some coffee. You in?

She wanted to laugh at the situation. They were like teenagers.

I thought you’d never ask.

Once again ignoring the slight odd flutter of her heart, she started towards the door. She swore silently as the door creaked a little, but Bridget remained motionless.

Their current hotel was going to be the last hotel for a while. As they traveled more towards the eastern states, they would switch from vans to tour buses for a while, due to the several outdoor concerts coming up. A slight shiver rang through her at the thought of the accessibility of the buses. That would mean more parties and drinks in a confined space, and more heat between people.

More friction.

“Hey.” It was a soft greeting, but nice.

Rian was smiling already and it made her heart melt a little. He was standing in the low lit lobby of their hotel in some oversized dark grey sweatpants and an All Time Low jacket, zipped up.
Cassadee let her mind slip for a second, wondering if he was wearing a shirt under the jacket or not. She hoped not.

“Hi,” she said back. It almost seemed normal.

“Come on, there is a coffee shop down the street.” Open at this hour? She had hoped.
He led the way out of the hotel, both of them thankfully deciding to ditch the cheap hotel brew and find something stronger. They didn’t say much for a moment, and Cassadee thought that words might just fall out of her mouth if he didn’t say something soon.

But still nothing. They waited to cross the street, and when it was their turn to cross, she felt Rian put a hand protectively across her lower back to guide her across.

She was shocked when she didn’t melt from that simple action. Even when they crossed the street, he kept his hand there, almost as if he didn’t realize he was doing it. But she didn’t say anything, giving in just once to how her body was reacting.

“Here it is,” he said, finally removing his hand and opening the door to the shop. There were not a lot of people inside, except for one barista and a group of exhausted businessmen. “It’s a nice place. The boys and I came here one year after a show. Easy to say, our fans like coffee now.”

She laughed as she sat on the closest couch, him following suit. “Well, it is pretty great.”

The small talk felt a little stiff, but she wasn’t complaining. “Can I get you anything?” he suddenly asked, pulling a few bills from his coat pocket. “My treat.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

He was already standing up. “I’m going to get you something. You should just tell me before I get you something too dark.”

She smiled a little and shrugged, flattered by the thought. “Anything tall and hot.”

A suggestive look crossed his face, but as soon as it was there, it was gone. He acted as if he was about to say something, but decided to just turn away and approach the bar. When he returned, he smirked and handed her something with foam at the top of it. “Hey, not that I mind ever but, why did you ask me to get coffee?”

Well, there it was. She had thought for a few hours about that question – in fact, she had come up with an answer – yet, now as he gazed lazily at her with a hint of a smirk tugging at his lips, she felt speechless.

“Well, I know you like coffee and so do I,” was what she said, and she could have hit herself.
His smirk broadened as he took a sip of his iced black coffee. Without looking at her, he said, “If you wanted to go on a date, I would have accepted.”

She rolled her eyes. “Oh, stop. I was just being nice.”

“Sure. Nice. To only me. At one in the morning.”

“Bridget was asleep?”

He raised an eyebrow. “You know, I asked you on a date a week ago. But you were too scared, so you said no.”

“I was not too scared.” But yes, hell yes, she was.

“And you haven’t talked to me for a week, Cass.” His tone was very calm as he said this. At this point, he looked over at her and gave her a small frown. “Why have you been running away from me all week?”

Oh, she just wanted to hug him then and apologize for denying whatever this was between them, but fear quickly swept in and reminded her that she needed to not do that. “Why did you try to come up to me and that bartender? Because I saw Matt pull you away.”

Rian looked away from her quickly and took a drink of his coffee. It was a moment before he responded, and the longer he took, the more interested she became in the answer. She was almost beginning to lean in out of anticipation before he said, “I didn’t like the way he was touching you.”

“It was only a hug,” she began, setting down her coffee and turning more towards him on the couch. “Just a friendly hug.”

“But it was more than that to him.” Rian huffed and looked down at the floor. His tone was more worked up now, overprotective. He was acting like her boyfriend, and Cassadee couldn’t tell if she enjoyed it or if it made her nervous.

“Why have you been avoiding me?” She drew in a sharp, silent breath as he asked her that question again.

She could run. She felt like it, but with the way he was now staring at her, it was like her body wouldn’t move even if she wanted it to. Instead, she looked down at her lap and began tapping her hands lightly against her knees.

“There is something between us,” she began delicately, looking up at him again. She observed his shocked expression. She was a little shocked herself, so it was understandable. “But we can’t explore it. There is too much at risk with our bands touring together.”

His face dropped at that. “I don’t think that’s the reason.” He looked at her skeptically then and tilted his head to the side. “You’re afraid of this. That’s what I think.”

Maybe because she thought he had used her for a rebound before. Maybe because she knew she had feelings and it scared her. Maybe because she was being too typical and was afraid of a relationship with the most relationship worthy man she knew.

“Will you stop assuming that I’m afraid of this and accept that maybe I just don’t want to date you?”

She thought her tone was a little harsh, and she wanted to avoid his face at this moment, but she couldn’t due to her sudden, extreme annoyance. How was he smiling?

But there it was, a calm and sly smile as he narrowed his eyes playfully.

“Then why did you ask me to come out with you at one in the morning?”

She pursed her lips at that and huffed a little, picking her coffee back up. Well, he wasn’t wrong. She had texted him.

He started to laugh when she didn’t respond, shamelessly scooting towards her on the couch. “Come on, tell me.” He leaned his face towards hers, almost challenging her to pull away.

But she didn’t. She stayed still but faced forward, deciding that looking at the wall was safe. “There is nothing to tell you. I asked you here to see why you almost bombarded me with that bartender.” She paused and glanced over at him. He was incredibly close now, and she had to refrain from shivering.

“That’s all?” His body heat was almost intoxicating as he scooted as close as he could. He slung his arm over her shoulder, and their legs brushed against each other. He had his face looming in the space between her collarbone and ear, and she wasn’t sure if he was trying to seduce her or not, but if not, it was working anyway.

“That’s all,” she repeated and pushed her hand against his chest – almost regrettably – and forced him back. “And stop pursuing this nonexistent relationship.” He was respectful enough to let her push him away but still kept his arm around her.

“It’s okay,” he admitted. Was it? She rose an eyebrow. “But our bands won’t be on tour together forever.” With that he winked and ran his hand slowly over her shoulder before standing from the couch and extending his hand.

She took it, still a little taken by those words. It kind of made her a little numb and warm at the same time, but she embraced it.

+

When Rian woke up the next morning, he wanted nothing more than to do the happiest dance he could think of. He decided to do it when the bands reached the venue in Concord a few hours later, causing Zack to look at him strangely.

“What’s gotten into you?” Currently, Zack was doing pullups on a bar that he had hooked to one of the trailers outside of the arena. “You’re way too chipper.”

“I’m just in a great mood.” He grinned broadly.

Alex walked around the corner of the trailer with Jack and Matt behind him, the two of them laughing about something that happened at the after party last night.

“You totally fell into that group of girls.” Matt was laughing harder as he tried to get the words out.

It caused Alex to roll his eyes. “Oh, come on! It could happen to anyone.”

“But it happened to you.” Jack was now clutching his sides as Rian and Zack started to laugh as well.

“Well, if someone,” Alex then looked towards the Hey Monday van and glared, “didn’t tie my shoe strings together, we would be fine.”

Jack then did a long, exaggerated stretch and slung his arm around Alex. “Then you’ll just have to get them back.”

The following hour was spent trying to figure out how to get back at Hey Monday during the show. There were several suggestions going around, such as more itching powder, gluing picks to the mic stands, retuning their instruments, and Jack even suggested that he would steal Cassadee’s bra again.

“We can decide after the meet and greet,” Matt suggested as they walked towards the venue. “The fans are a little antsy.”

And they were. When the boys of All Time Low walked in the side door of the greeting room, Rian swore that he saw a girl faint. The screams suddenly became very intense. Hey Monday was already on the other side of the room, and a few fans in their line started to jump in excitement.

Rian glanced over at the other band and caught Cassadee’s eyes for a moment. He tried to hold her gaze as long as he could, smirking heavily and winking. A surge of accomplishment went through him as she looked away quickly, but he still saw the blush on her face.

This was fantastic.

Every so often, Rian would stop autographing photos and glance over at Cassadee. Every time, she had been grinning and hugging one of her fans eagerly, and her fans clung to her like she was their lifeline. Patrick and Chris were also hugging fans, and Lipshaw was joking with a few kids. Mike was there too, signing autographs.

Zack was now waving at a few girls who yelled his name, and Alex embraced a girl so intensely that she could have wrapped her legs around his waist if she wasn’t so short. Jack was having a heated discussion with a group of fans about pancakes being better than waffles.
“Well, you really are in your element,” said a female voice.

Rian glanced up and felt his entire body tighten within that second. He dropped his sharpie and let out a shallow breath. “What are you…?” He didn’t finish the sentence and the woman showed off a triumphant grin.

“Doing here?” She concluded, walking a little closer to him. He didn’t move as she clapped her hand lightly on his chest. “I bought tickets, of course. I told you I would always come to your shows if they were close to Concord. It just happened to be here this time.”

…how could he forget? No, that was easy. When you break off a relationship, it was typical to forget a majority of things. But this… how could he forget this?

He felt like an absolute idiot.

“That was before we broke up,” Rian closed his eyes and rubbed his head with building frustration. “You don’t have to come to my shows anymore.”

She gave him this sweet, almost cynical frown.

Fuck, this was a disaster.

“Um,” Zack came up at that moment, and Rian wanted to hug him for it. “Rian, we need to get going. Sound check is soon.”

“Great.” He said that a little too eagerly and was already walking away from her.

“See you at the show, Ri!” Her energetic tone was shrill and it caused him to only turn briefly and give a half-hearted wave.

What the hell was she doing here?

Notes

Hey guys! Have a great day! Thanks for reading. <3