I walked through the corridors, finding my way from my dressing room to the stage. Some guy who worked here was guiding me, keeping one hand on the small of my back. I always hated it when people did that; if you wanted me to follow you, you could just tell me, there was no urge to actually make physical contact with me. Family and partners could do it, but strangers just made me want to cringe away. However, that was another thing I had gotten used to. In the presence of celebrity, people just did that type of stuff, especially if they were ‘in charge’. Seriously, some dude with a microphone headset did not have to guide me like I didn’t know where I was going.

To be honest, I already knew my way around this place. I had been on The Ellen Show way more often than I could count. This was one of the only talk shows where I could talk about stuff without getting attacked. It wasn’t formal at all, quite the opposite. Being on this show was always fun. All those celebrities who acted like Ellen’s ‘best friend’ really weren’t only doing it to be nice. Sure, best friend was a bit exaggerated, but everybody loved her. Or at least most people I knew loved her, me included.

This time I was going to be on the show to clear up all the rumours going on. Much like what Justin Bieber did after he had been arrested a couple of times and did so many bad things. Only this was actually a lot different… I hadn’t been arrested for doing something illegal, and it wasn’t like I was going to do that again after apologizing. This was for a completely different reason. The rumours were going absolutely crazy. I couldn’t even follow it anymore.

The news about Jack and I going out had spread like wildfire. Seriously. Even though Jack and I had only shared one kiss at the zoo, there were millions of pictures, all from different angles. It was definitely the topic all the gossip channels and magazines were talking about. Everywhere I went, I would see the photos. It kind of scared me, but I also knew that it was all on us. If we had been able to control ourselves, maybe none of this would have happened.

Because the rumour about Jack and I dating wasn’t the only thing going on. Apparently, I was also dating Nat Wolff, my co-star. There had been a couple more rehearsals the last couple of weeks. Nat and I just happened to decide to go and get coffee for everybody one day. So, the paparazzi managed to capture some pictures of us walking into Starbucks together. Was that really such a crime? I didn’t seem to think so. But people believed what they wanted to believe, jumping to conclusions in no time.

Now, all that mixed together with my divorce not being finalized yet just caused a great mayhem. Everybody was freaking the fuck out. Apparently, all of it was proof that I was the reason why Travis and I were getting a divorce. It made it all clear that I had cheated on him with multiple guys, and that he was hurt so much. Nobody seemed to care that he had been spotted with several girls as well. The movie industry was really sexist in that way. The media was trying to make me seem like I was the evil that killed our relationship, causing him great heartbreak. Nobody even realized that the reason we weren’t talking to each other anymore was because we literally legally weren’t allowed to do so. Not one person tried to correct everybody else.

Oh, and yes, Jack had been on tour for a couple of weeks now. He didn’t exactly know all the drama going on right now. I didn’t know how he managed to escape it all, but I was definitely being bombarded. We had texted every day, occasionally FaceTiming as well, but he never mentioned anything about the whole world knowing about our relationship… well, actually the fact that we were dating, Jack and I actually weren’t in a relationship. At least I didn’t think so… Nobody seemed to mind the fact that he was seeing me, though, they only cared that I was seeing him. Kinda weird if you ask me.

As I was waiting to get onto the stage, I straightened out my black pencil skirt one more time, checking that my gray t-shirt that had a twist in front of it wasn’t riding up too much and showing too much skin. It was a simple, yet classy outfit. I just wanted to make sure I wasn’t doing something that would cause me to be much more of a disgrace. At least it was already a whole lot better than the dresses they often made me wear that I absolutely hated. These were clothes I actually owned myself! The only thing the stylists really had fun with was my hair, giving me a half up, half down hairdo with a very large voluminous braid.

And then I got to sign to walk onto the stage, just after Ellen had introduced me. The audience started clapping as I made my appearance and went up to Ellen and gave her a hug. She welcomed me and told me to take a seat, and I happily did, continuing to keep a bright smile on my face. A weird habit I had, I guess.

“So, a lot has been going on, hasn’t it?” Ellen chuckled, trying to make it lighter so it would be easier for me to talk about.

I laughed as well, hoping people would see that the situation wasn’t as serious as they thought, “yeah, you can say so. It’s more than most people can handle. Every day I find out one more thing about myself that I didn’t know! Apparently, I have a child with some guy in New York, but I don’t recall ever being pregnant, nor ever giving birth. I’m pretty sure I would remember that.”

“I’ve been trying to follow all the rumours, but I really don’t know what’s going on anymore. Can you explain some of them, make it easier for us all?” Ellen suggested, leading us into the topic we wanted to talk about, waving her cue cards around as she talked.

“Anything for you, Ellen,” I grinned and took a deep breath, “so let’s start at the beginning. The rumour about me and Travis getting a divorce. Well, that is true.” the whole audience gasped on cue, making it dramatic, but I just shook my head. “However, everything else being said around it really isn’t. I don’t know for how long exactly, but Travis and I just weren’t in love anymore. We tried to make it work, but it turned more into a best friend type of thing. So, we are still friends, neither of us cheated, and it’s all mutual.”

“But we’ve heard you guys don’t talk anymore or even dare to see each other anymore. Why do that when you’re still good friends like you guys claim?”

“Because we’re getting a divorce and have to prove that we can live apart without any troubles. We only have two more weeks and we are allowed to hang out as much as we want to. Trust me, I would have rather had him with me to explain everything so there aren’t any misunderstandings. We’d actually planned to not tell anybody about it until it was completely finalized, but it somehow came out without us having any say in it. If it were up to us, we’d have announced it in two weeks, when we could actually go out and explain things without people saying stuff without knowing their information.”

“Apparently I once broke up with Portia, but I didn’t even find out about it until I found it on the cover of a magazine. I guess this is a bit like that.” Ellen prompted, making me nod along with her, “But there are more rumours about you dating a couple of guys. Let’s start with this one.”

The picture of Nat and I walking into Starbucks was now shown on the large screen behind us for all the viewers to see. I ran a hand over my face, making sure not to smudge the makeup I was wearing. This was going to be difficult because I couldn’t exactly say anything about the movie we were starting to make. I was just going to have to tell them what I could. “No, Nat Wolff and I aren’t dating, I can guarantee that. He’s a nice guy and all, but I can’t see us ever being more than friends. We only met a couple of weeks ago for work. I mean, we’re both actors and we’ve both done some auditions. So there may or may not be a recording of us playing in something together. I can’t really tell you any details.”

“So, you’re saying you’re both playing in the same movie.”

“Ok, yes. But that’s all I can say. I can’t give away anything else or they might sue me!”

“Long story short, you and Nat are not dating and are only around each other because of a movie. Ok, cool, but what about this guy. His name is Jack Baka-- Barak-- Barakat? Wow, that’s a confusing name…” She had to strain her eyes as she read the name off of one of the cards, trying her best to pronounce it right.

The picture switched to me and Jack sharing a kiss at the zoo and I immediately blushed. I really hoped this wasn’t going to ruin whatever we had. “Yeah, Jack Barakat. I met him at the APMAs, which are basically like the MTV music awards, but then for rock music and all the other genres. I went to the red carpet event and was asked to do some interviews. I met his band, All Time Low--”

“Ooh, a band guy. I get it now. Who can resist them?”

I giggled and couldn’t help another blush that crept onto my cheeks. “Yeah, well, we immediately hit it off. We talked for a bit and, yeah, you can probably guess what happened from that photo. It’s too early to label it, though.”

“So he’s not your new boyfriend?” Ellen questioned.

“We aren’t in an exclusive relationship, but I can tell you that I’m not seeing anybody other than him. We’ll just have to see how it goes. One thing, though, I did not cheat of Travis with him. That would have made no sense. The divorce became public before I even met Jack.”

“Well, I hope the next time we see you is when you’ve got that new movie coming up, unless you want to come before that. Maybe we’ll get another inside scoop,” she winked at me, ending our short interview there.

“You know I will never say no to you.”

After that, I had left the stage, being guided back to my dressing room by one of the assistant producers of the show. I was happy to see that Judy was waiting for me and that I wasn’t alone. She gave me a big smile and went up to hug me immediately. Not knowing how it had all went, I really appreciated her hug. This was either going to make things a little better, stopping people from bugging me, or make people think of even more rumours to start! And then there was Jack--

Oh god, Jack. I froze up completely when I thought of what I had just done.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Judy had a strong grip on both my shoulders and looked me in the eyes, “you looked so happy on TV, how did you suddenly go from that to this? I know you’re good at faking it, but you’re not this good.”

“I was happy,” I nodded, but continued to stare ahead as I was terrified of what was to come, “but then I realized I never even asked if Jack was ok with me confirming the rumours. What if I just ruined everything? Maybe he didn’t want everybody to know, and now I’ll never see him again.”

“Well, you can’t really do anything about that. He should know what he was getting into, dating a celebrity like you. There are some consequences,” she walked up to the mini fridge and threw a bottle of water at me. I was quick enough to grab it, but was still too concerned to act normal. “Otherwise you should just call him, give him a heads up before he finds out through the media.”

I nodded and shakily reached for my phone in my bag, which had been on the table provided, “yeah… maybe I should do that… you know, just for sure…”

And so I went into autopilot, finding Jack’s contact and ringing his number. I slowly brought the phone to my ear, waiting for the empty dial tones to end. It didn’t take long for Jack to answer in his usual over joyous voice, acting like the man-child he could be.

“Hello, beautiful,” he chirped down the line, his smile evident in his tone of voice; the tone that would usually automatically make me break into my own grin, added with a small blush from the subtle compliment he’d give me.

“Umm, Jack, I need to tell you something.” I couldn’t reciprocate his happiness this time. Judy pointed at the door before slowly slipping out, closing the door behind her softly.

“Oh…” His mood immediately managed to change completely. “Is something wrong?”

“I did something and was stupid enough not the check with you first.”

“W-what did you do?”

I prepared for the worst to happen. A great way for things to happen, right? Making the whole thing public only for Jack to end things because of what I’d done. That would be difficult to explain, wouldn’t it?

“Well, I was just on The Ellen Show and, umm, I was there to clear up some things. So, questions were being asked, and I sorta kinda said that we were seeing each other. But I completely forgot to check with you if that was ok! I would have totally understood if you hadn’t wanted that yet, because it’s just going to give annoying attention you might not want, and maybe you would have wanted to tell other people before it actually came out, if it would ever have come out…” I stopped myself before I continued to ramble. I was known as a cool and collected person, I couldn’t just start freaking out now. It was just unnecessary anxiety.

“Hey, calm down, it’s completely fine. I knew what I was getting myself into, and if I didn’t want anybody finding out, I wouldn’t have kissed you in public. Seriously, I like you too much to make this a very short fling. Nobody will get between us, don’t worry.” Jack emphasized that it was all ok, that I had to stop scaring myself about something as small as this. He was right, if we wanted to make this work, then we shouldn’t worry about how the media would try to break us apart. “You know, I was actually afraid you were going to tell me that you didn’t wait for me.”

“No, I wouldn’t do that. I made a promise to you.”

“And I made that promise to you too. Just a couple more weeks and we’ll be able to see each other again.”

“Just a couple more weeks.”

Notes

Found this in my archives, forgot I wrote it three months ago... Enjoy it now. I'm thinking of starting this story again, but I know I don't have any time. It sucks so much.