Dancing with the wolves

Since dad and Pa came home early I went home from my mates and just sat in my room thinking like always.
"Hey sweetheart." Dad said quietly as he walked into my room.
"Hey dad." I said and looked down at my hands.
"You okay?" He asked as he sat on my bed.
I shrugged my shoulders.
"I dunno." I whispered.
"What's the matter?" He asked.
"I've hurt myself." I whispered and a couple of tears fell.
"Dad fancy a game?" Rowan asked.
"Later Row, I have somethings here to sort out. Go and ask Pa." He said and looked at Rowan.
"But he's shit." Rowan moaned.
"Look, let me talk to Finn and I'll be will you as soon as I can. In fact instead of playing your game get on and do your homework." He said.
"It's hard." Rowan said.
"Hey a perfect reason why you should get your stuff and go downstairs and get Pa to help you." Dad said.
"Fine!" Rowan huffed and walked off.

Once dad knew he was gone and out of ear shot, he looked at me.
"Where?" Dad asked quietly.
"My legs." I whispered.
Dad pulled me into his chest and rested his chin on my head.
"How long?" He asked.
3 months." I said.
Dad pulled back and looked at me.
"Why didn't you come and talk to me? I'm always here if you ever want to talk." He said hurt in his voice.
"I dunno, don't be mad at me please. I'm sorry." I sobbed.
Dad pulled me back into his chest and rocked himself side to side and kissed the top of my head.
"I'm not mad at you. I'm just upset that you didn't come and talk to me." He said.
"I'm sorry." I whispered.
"Don't say sorry. Tell me why you did it." He said.

By the time I finished telling dad he just held me tighter than before.
"Don't end up like me." He said quietly.
I looked at his arms and his scars where still very visible to everyone.
I looked at him.
"I won't." I whispered.
"Give me your blades." He said as I moved away from him.
I nodded and got up and got my blades and gave them to him.
He stared at them and then he looked at me.
"Come with me." He said and got up and I followed and we went to the bathroom.
"Get some toilet paper." He said and I looked at him.
"Just do it." He smiled and I did.
"Wrap these in the paper and put it in the toilet and flush." He said and I did what he said.
"No more Finn. Promise me no more." He said and looked at me.
"I promise dad." I said.
He held his little finger up.
I smiled and linked mine with his.
"You talk to me if you get a urge. No matter what time of day. Talk to me and I'll be here for you." He said and kissed my forehead.
I smiled and he pulled me into a hug.
"We'll get through it together okay." He whispered.
"Thanks dad." I whispered back and kissed his cheek.
"You have any homework you need to do?" He asked.
I nodded.
"Want my help?" He asked.
"Please, this Religious shit is baffling me." I said and dad chuckled.
"Well you know that this family is not religious in the slightest." He said.
"I know but its funny when we all seem to have very heated discussions about." I said.
Dad just chuckled and we went to my room where dad helped me.

"Shut the fuck up." Pa said and looked at Rowan seriously.
"Guys can we not talk about this while having food." Dad said.
"Sorry dad." Rowan said and looked down.
"How's Finns love life getting on?" Rowan asked.
"What's that?" I asked.
"Arent you inastrestred in anyone?" He asked.
"No, all the guys are disgusting and actually really horrible and if you find a nice one they just want in your pants." I said.
"She has a point." Pa said.
"You wanted in my pants when we first became friends." Dad said.
"Worked though didn't it." Pa smirked.
Dad kicked him under the table.
"Ow. That was uncalled for." Pa said.
Me and Rowan just chuckled.
"Technically, the alcohol got you in my pants." Dad said.
"Can we please not talk about this." Rowan said.
"Just saying." Dad chuckled.

I was sat in my bed watching a DVD when Pa poked his head round the door.
"You okay?" He asked.
"Yeah, can't sleep though." I said quietly.
Pa walked in and lead on the bed.
"Why aren't you with dad?" I asked.
"The sofa is his bed tonight, I can't fit on the sofa with him." He said.
"He told me what you've been doing to yourself." He said quietly.
"I'm sorry." I whispered.
"Don't let it happen again. Me and dad love you to bits like with everyone else. We don't want to see you hurt." He said.
"Me and dad flushed the blade away." I said quietly.
I felt Pa smile.
"Well done." He whispered and kissed my cheek and he got comfy.
I cuddled into his chest.
"Go to sleep." He said quiwtly and i nodded and i fell asleep not long after.

Notes