Ash's POV
*Smut Warning*

“So, what do you want to do today?” I asked Alex as we were both lying down on one of the couches in the family living room.

My brothers and dad went out for some last minute Christmas shopping, only coming back home late since they went out of town for it. Alex and I decided to stay back and catch up on our jetlag. It was one in the afternoon and we were still in our pajamas.

“I don’t know,” he shrugged, putting his phone down, “I’d say sleep for a bit longer, but we have to beat this jetlag or we will never be awake during the day.”

“We could go out to a bar or something,” I suggested, sitting up and stretching out, my shirt riding up my stomach.

“A bar? What-- Oh, wait we’re in Germany… forgot the legal drinking age is 16. Not that I would have said no if we were back home.” He smirked, not showing any signs of getting up soon.

“Well, are we going to go or not?”

“Why the hell not, gotta have some German beer while I’m here,” he finally got off the couch, an indent left in the cushioning, “but first I’d like to put on some clothes.”

“I was actually thinking of going in our pajamas,” I rolled my eyes and giggled, dragging him up to my room again. If I wasn’t going to make him do stuff, we’d never get out of this house.

I didn’t mind changing in front of Alex anymore. I always used to be wary, either asking him to leave the room, or going to the bathroom myself, but now all I did was turn around so my back was facing him. He didn’t get to see anything except for my bare back, and everytime I forgot to bring something with me, I’d ask him to close his eyes (especially if it was my bra). It worked out well. Slowly but surely, I was becoming more and more comfortable around Alex. It was nice not having to be so paranoid the entire time.

This time, I managed to get dressed before Alex did. Normally he would be waiting for me, but apparently he wasn't so used to having to choose clothes from a suitcase. I turned around to expect him to be fully clothed, but he was just standing there in his boxers, just having taken a shirt out of his bag. A blush formed on my face as he didn’t notice me and pulled his shirt on. I would be lying if I said I didn’t think he was very, very hot. Some people might even say I was turned on by seeing him half naked, but that realisation didn’t even occur to me.

“Oh great,” Alex sighed, “you’re fully clothed and I’m standing here in a shirt and my boxers. The world is backwards today!”

“Just hurry up,” I chuckled and could help but stare secretly as he bent down to find his jeans.

When he picked them up, and tugged them out of the suitcase where they were stuck underneath something. When he finally got them free, something flew out of his pockets and fell on the floor. I could immediately tell what it was. There was no way that that was a candy wrapper, trust me. Anybody could tell what it was. I just didn’t understand why he would have that in his jeans’ pocket.

“Fuck,” he whispered before scrambling to pick it up, “I, umm, I… It isn’t what you think? My, umm, dad gave it to me at the airport. He, umm, thought that we would, umm, you know. And umm, yeah, I just…”

“Oh, ok,” I nodded, not thinking it was such a big deal, “My dad forced one in my hand as well on the day we arrived.”

He chuckled awkwardly, not understanding how I was so cool about it, “I guess they think we are a pair of hormonal teenagers.”

I watched as he quickly and clumsily put on his jeans. “Aren’t we a pair of hormonal teenagers?”

“Are we?” Alex snapped his head towards me, his eyes wide with an emotion I couldn’t identify.

“I mean, hormones control nearly all our bodily functions…” I innocently explained.

“Oh yeah, right. So, umm, how about we go to that bar you were talking about?”

----

When we got back to my house, we went straight up to my bedroom again. All we were planning on doing was lounging on my bed while trying our best not to fall asleep. We didn’t have much to drink, not planning on coming home drunk and have my dad be disappointed in us. Alex was tempted however, telling me how much better the beer was here than in America. I couldn’t agree more.

However, when I saw Alex walk into my room first, I couldn’t get the image of him being half naked in front of me. The image had popped up occasionally in my head, but I always managed to shake it off. This time is was permanent. I had seen him in his boxers or swim shorts before, but they always left me embarrassed and ashamed, but this image, it was giving such different feelings.

“You know, I’m really glad you asked me to come with you,” Alex smiled, waltzing over to me, “I like it here and I like spending time with you.”

When his arms circled around me and his lips carefully touched mine, I couldn’t help but bring him closer. My hand traveled up his long back, finally resting on his shoulders, allowing me to deepen the kiss and move to tug his hair a little. I could feel Alex was fighting back a moan, not wanting to succumb to the feelings he always tried to suppress during our makeout sessions. But something in me wanted him to let those out this time. I pushed him towards my bed, so that I was sitting in his lap, straddling him as his hands were on my hips.

“We-- we should probably stop,” he breathed out, panting to catch his breath again.

I climbed off him, acting like I was listening to him, but once I was sat next to him, I pulled him towards me so I could continue to kiss him. Rather than not knowing what I was doing, I was going to let Alex take control. He melted into me, before scolding himself and pulling away again.

“You’re going to make this too difficult for me,” he whispered, still only inches away from me, looking in my eyes. I could feel his hot breath against my skin.

Something in me made me make a giant leap. “But what if I want to?”

“Make this too difficult for me?” He frowned, his hands still on me. If only I could get him to move those hands in a way only he could that made me shiver in a good way.

“Well, that’s mean--” realisation suddenly hit him, “oh. Wait. Are you sure?”

I nodded, and reached out so I could resume kissing him. It started off sweet to comfort him, but once it got more heated, he could tell I really did want to do it, that I wasn’t just saying this because I knew he wanted to have sex. He had wanted this since he met me, but it was only now that I was ready. And I really, really was ready.

His shirt came off, allowing my hands to roam the torso that I was fantasizing about just minutes before. Embracing him in this way was something I never did before, but I liked it. It allowed me to be just a bit more personal with him. However, when he started pulling at the hem of my shirt, I immediately pushed his hands away. It was something I did subconsciously. All I could remember was Luke ripping off my shirt in one go.

But this was Alex, I could trust him.

“Ash, are you really sure you want to do this? I don’t want you doing anything you’re not ready for yet,” Alex sighed. He didn’t sound disappointed, but concerned, really afraid he was going too far.

“Yeah, umm, just let me take off my own clothes,” I mumbled with a small blush, feeling embarrassed for not wanting him to take off my clothes, but being ok with him having sex with me. I took off my shirt, immediately making Alex stare at me.

“Ok, but only if--”

I unclasped my bra as well, making it drop to the floor. Alex let out a shaky breath, shaking his head while his eyes were fixated on my breasts. I couldn’t help but bite my lip, knowing that I had this effect on him.

“I’m convinced,” he gulped, slamming his lips against mine in a hasty kiss.

He pushed me up the bed further, so my head was on the pillows, allowing him to hover better over me, his lower body on top of mine. I could feel his excitement grow as he hands traveled up to meet with my breasts. A moan escaped my throat as he managed to already make me feel things I never felt before. His hands were all over me, touching me, and I couldn’t get enough.
But, just as I was going to let out another pleasured sound, he ripped away from me. “Wait, where’s the condom. We need the condom.”

“On my desk,” I pointed at the piece of furniture, realising I was shaking, but it felt good, way too good.

Alex quickly climbed off me, running to the desk and finding the one my dad had given to me. He shrugged off his jeans as he made his way back over to me. This time, the sight of him made me blush even more. Not only was he half naked, but he was obviously aroused, his boxers standing up like a tent. He focused completely on me, though, and got back on top of me, making sure he wasn’t hurting me or making me uncomfortable.

“I’d take your jeans off now, but…”

I nodded, undoing the button and zipper, pushing down my jeans just one third down my thighs, “you-- you can do the rest, if you want…”

He smiled, kissing me slowly before focusing his attention on pulling off my jeans. When the fabric was finally off me, he started working his way up again, kissing all the scars I had on my thighs from the sharp knife Luke had hurt me with. Alex was trying to fix them all, trying to make me forget about their presence. For the first time I felt loved again, loved in every way possible.

His hands traveled up the rest of the way before resting in between my legs, creeping under my panties. My eyes went wide at his touch. It was then that I realised I really didn’t know a thing about sex. I thought it was supposed to be rushed, in, out, done and over with, but Alex didn’t make it seem that way at all. He was actually making me feel good, earning a moan from me when he let his fingers make the right movement.

“Is-- is this ok?” He asked quietly, looking up at me.

I nodded quickly, only catching a quick glimpse of his face, before pushing myself back into the pillows, my back arching and my mouth opening wide in pleasure. He didn’t even understand how much I was enjoying this right now. He was worried, but to be honest, there was no reason to. He knew what he was doing, making me feel good in all the right places.

There was a light tugging on the last piece of clothing I was wearing, before that was also pulled down my legs. Kisses started trailing up my bare torso, up in between my breasts, along my jawline before coming back onto my lips.

“Are you sure you still want to do this?” He double checked another time.

I just nodded for the millionth time that day. With how far we had gotten this time, I couldn’t even think about backing out. I was too far in the pleasure to suddenly not want it anymore.

“Ok, then.” He pushed himself up to shakingly take off his boxers, giving me a full view of his entire figure and body.

Holy shit. He was naked. I was naked. We were both naked. This was the most vulnerable I could be, but all I could think about was how much I wanted him, craved him.

Pushing up fully, so he was now kneeling in the space just between my legs, he grabbed the wrapper that he had put on the other side of my bed, ripping it open and taking out the weird looking object. I watched as he rolled the condom on himself, fascinated by how he managed to do it so swiftly.

He went back to hovering over me, placing an elbow on either side of my head. “You are really sure?”

I wrapped my legs around his torso instead of giving him a verbal answer. He just needed to get it on already. Being worried was cute at the beginning, but I couldn’t take it anymore. I craved that contact I had never felt. All I needed was him to help me with it, creating this new connection we didn’t have before.

He took the hint, and made sure he was aligned properly. My arms went underneath his arms, my hands resting on his shoulders, as I braced myself for the pain I felt last time. I didn’t care how much this was going to hurt, I still wanted to do this.

However, when he finally pushed into me, I couldn’t feel anything but immense pleasure. I gasped, my fingers already digging into his skin. Was this really what it was supposed to feel like? Was it really this amazing?

“Oh, shit, I’m hurting you, aren’t I?” Alex immediately stopped moving. “We probably shouldn’t do--”

“Shut the fuck up, Alex,” I breathed, quickly moving my hands off his body to grab his face instead, making his lips fall in sync with mine.

Automatically, he began thrusting in and out, causing me to make small noises every time he made a small movement, making all my senses go in overdrive. This was what my first time was supposed to be like; with somebody I loved, trusted, and somebody who would be gentle while also knowing what they were doing. Alex was the guy who I wanted all my firsts to be with.

His breath mixed with mine, creating a strong sweet smell of the actions going on in my bedroom. I went back to tug on his hair, making him groan in physical pleasure, speeding his pace up a little.

But that’s when it started going wrong.

I didn’t know what was going on back then, but all the feelings were building up, creating a large pressure throughout me. My breathing was laboured, making it difficult for me to catch my breath anymore. Anxiety immediately rushed through me, thinking I was doing something wrong. I wanted to feel a calm sense of pleasure the entire time, not some heavy feeling at the bottom of my stomach.

“Alex,” I staggered, pushing my hands softly against his chest, “”sto-op.”

He immediately did so, looking down at me with a nervous expression, afraid he was doing something wrong. “Too much?”

“Too much,” I whispered with a nod, embarrassed that I was making him stop before he could even reach his release.

He pulled out of me, but that didn’t help get rid of that strange feeling going on inside of me -- if anything, it only made it worse.

“It’s ok,” he brushed a hand through my sweaty hair, “there’s nothing wrong with not wanting it anymore, you get to say stop whenever you want. I understand.”

He went to roll off me and lie down beside me, but I held onto him, keeping him in place. “Just wait a bit…” I mumbled, “Just let me catch my breath, and we can continue.”

“You don’t have to do this for me.”

I shook my head and smiled, reaching out to kiss him again.

----

We fell asleep after having started again. It didn’t take long for me to feel comfortable enough to keep going. Alex had managed to find his release while I was happy with the way everything had gone. I was on his chest, my eyes shut and having drifted off to the sound of his heartbeat, while Alex didn’t take much longer to start snoring gently. If we weren’t as tired as we were I would have known better than to be in my bed, completely naked, with the door unlocked. Something was bound to happen with the way everything seemed too perfect to be true.

I didn’t know how late it was, but suddenly my door opened loudly and one of my brothers walked in. I jumped awake, seeing it was the oldest, Jaxon. His face showed panic when he saw two naked bodies in bed, quickly turning around so he didn’t have to be scarred any further. Alex was trying to cover me up, by I threw the duvet at him instead, knowing that my brothers had seen me naked many times before when we were younger. I didn’t necessarily like them seeing me like this, but I was fine with it if it needed to happen.

“I didn’t see anything!” Jaxon was quick to blurt out, covering his eyes even though he wasn’t facing us anymore, “you guys were just taking an innocent nap, because yeah, and…. Dinner’s ready.”

“Please don’t tell dad,” I quickly requested anyway.

“Why would I want to tell him?” He squeaked out, feeling way too uncomfortable to stay here any longer, “I’ll just say you guys just woke up, but I’m not responsible for covering you guys if you take too long.”

With that, he rushed out of my room, slamming the door closed behind him.

“Did that just happen?” Alex asked me, still half asleep.

“I think it did…” I sighed, slowly getting off my bed and starting to put my underwear back on.

“And he isn’t going to blackmail you?”

“No, why?”

He got up as well, searching for a new pair of boxers, “because that’s what most siblings do.”

“I guess we don’t do that,” I shrugged, “plus, is there anything more awkward for a thirteen year old to talk to their parents about sex? Do you really think he’ll willingly go up to my dad and say ‘hey, my sister had sex with her boyfriend, I don’t know why I told you, but still’. No, nobody would do that, especially not a thirteen year old.”

“He could still blackmail you, though,” Alex pointed out, quickly changing into a shirt and some sweatpants, making the fact that all we did was ‘fall asleep’ more believable.

“But why would he want to? We never hold grudges against each other. But if he suddenly does, I’ve got some dirt about him too, so we’re in the clear.” I quickly ran a brush through my hair so the knots and tangles weren’t visible anymore. It would have been a clear give away.

“Well, let’s go downstairs before your dad thinks we’re up here making out or something, not that I would mind doing that…”

I shook my head in disbelief and dragged him along with me, rushing downstairs so they wouldn’t start eating without us. My dad was just putting a large bowl of plain pasta on the table. It seemed like too much food for us all, but since I was the only girl, I knew how quickly it would be all finished.

“Some wild sleeper aren’t you, Alex?” Dad chuckled, pointing at Alex’s sex hair.

His eyes went wide, realising he forgot to fix his hair before coming downstairs, but he still managed to cover up with a small white lie. “Yeah, I either seem like I’m dead, not moving an inch, or I just keep tossing and turning. There’s no in between. I guess you’re all lucky to see me like this today.”

Jaxon started choking on his water, only being able to think of seeing Alex naked for a split second. I guess you could say he wasn’t lucky to see Alex like that today. “Water… wrong pipe… I’m ok.”

I rolled my eyes and gave him a light painless smack against the head. Just because he wasn’t going to tell, didn’t mean that all the awkwardness he was feeling didn’t exist.

“Hey, Ash, have you seen any ghosts while we were out?” Charley asked, not realising what basically had just happened in front of him.

“No, I’m sorry bud,” I ruffled his hair as I walked past his chair, sitting down opposite of him, “but I’ll make sure to look out for them next time.”

Notes

And it's done! They did the do! It's over and done with. No more tension, now everybody can stop bugging me about it. I mean, come on guys, everybody's just been begging me to write it already! Ok, no... nobody has. Nobody has even mentioned it once... Maybe you guys didn't even want to read this... Oh well, I did give you a warning, you didn't have to read it.

please don't send me to jail