Alex knew he shouldn't be here, too many people he didn't know and wasn't comfortable around. He didn't want to drink too much not with the medication he was on, he stood at the doorway to the living room and watched as everyone danced and played drinking games in the corner. Alcohol worked different on Alex than others he knew he was either a loud annoying drunk or he became more depressed and sat quietly. He wasn't sure which one was going to take over him tonight but he wanted to be home before it hit him."Ale! Go get some drink and stop standing there sulking" Zack shouted to Alex over the music and Alex could tell his friend was already intoxicated, Zack could never hold his drink well and everyone knew it."I'm okay dude and I'm not sulking! I just don't feel in the mood to party" He said shrugging and Zack looked back at Alex his eyes piercing."What is wrong with you? You've been acting weird for months Alex, we never see you out unless it's a game or at school. I'm your best friend Alex tell me what's wrong" Zack said putting a hand on Alex's shoulder but he brushed it off heading for the front door."Nothing is wrong with me Zack just leave me alone okay!" Alex shouted as Zack followed him out the house and stopped him."Fuck Alex I'm trying to make sure you're okay and you shut me out, if that's what you want then fine! Go back to your mom oh wait she doesn't give a shit about you" Zack spat at him and before Alex knew what he was doing his fist connected to Zack's jaw. The two boys ended up in a fist fight in the front garden and Flyzik ran out to pull the two of them off each other, Alex spat the blood out his mouth and looked at Zack there was a chance Alex had broken his nose. He was also pretty sure Zack had given him a black eye, Rian and Colussy ran out then as Alex went to swing another punch at Zack. Flyzik and Colussy dragged Zack away while Rian lead Alex to the car."I'm walking" Alex said leaving Rian standing there and he knew Rian wouldn't follow him, Alex got home in under ten minutes and went straight to the bathroom to see the damage glad that Kathy wasn't in. He had a black eye forming around his right eye, a few cuts on his cheeks and a sore jaw from a few punches. Zack's words kept ringing in his mind 'what is wrong with you' 'she doesn't give a shit about you' 'you shut me out' It was getting to much for Alex, he knew what he was doing to his friends but he couldn't stop it. He was losing everyone that he thought meant something to him but he should have known that no one really cares about him not even his own parents, opening the medicine cabinet Alex raided through it for a small box. Opening the small plastic box the silver metal shined at him, as if it was smiling at him, inviting him to give in. Picking up the razor Alex rolled the sleeve of his t-shirt up and looked at all the white scars on his arms, closing his eyes he pressed the sliver metal down against his skin and then relief washed through Alex. Not even looking at his arm he placed the razor back in the small box and put it back into its hiding place, he got up and stumbled to his bed his head feeling dizzy and then guilt of what he done rose up inside him. Looking at his arms tears of guilt and anger spilled down his cheeks stinging slightly due to the cuts cause by his fight with Zack, that night Alex cried himself to sleep like he did most nights. He always wondered how his life got this way but he could only think of one answer and it killed him to blame it all on his own brother. Alex woke the next morning feeling exhausted, his jaw was sore and his arm hurt like a motherfucker. Getting up Alex threw on his sweats, a hoodie and went about changing his bed sheets because of his cuts once that was done Alex changed into Jeans deciding to go a walk. As he was locking his front door Kathy's car rolled up, sighing Alex walked over to say hi and be asked about his face that looked much worse today."Hey Alex I- Oh my God what happened? Are you okay!" Kathy rushed out her car and took Alex's face between her hands to look at him better."I'm fine but that hurts" Alex said wincing, Kathy dropped her hands straight away and sighed."I got into a fight with Zack last night" Alex whispered and Kathy just shook her head which made Alex feel worse about himself."Don't worry the two of you are like brothers, he'll forgive you and Alex you do know I'll need to tell your dad about this" Kathy said looking sad and Alex nodded not looking forward to what his dad was going to say once he phoned or came home. Leaving Kathy at his house Alex took the thirty minute walk into town with his hood up to avoid people staring at his face, walking into a small coffee shop Alex took down his hood and walked up to the counter."Hey can I get a cappuccino" Alex said getting out the correct money and looking up his breath caught in his throat."Jack! I didn't know you worked here" Alex said blushing slightly and Jack smiled then frowned."What happened to your face?" He said as he started to make Alex's order but kept within talking distance."Eh I got into a fight with Zack last night" Alex shrugged."Are you okay?" Jack asked looking straight at Alex."Yeh I'll live, what about you? I hope you didn't get into trouble for staying the other night" Alex said hoping he hadn't made thing worse of Jack in his home but the boy looked okay."She was fine with it I've just to phone next time, not that she really cared anyway I think she was just trying to sound like the parent" Jack shrugged this time handing Alex his drink."On me" Jack said pushing Alex's hand back and the boy honestly thought he felt electricity run through him when Jack touched him."What are you doing tonight?" Alex blurted out and wanted to slap himself again."Nothing why?" Jack smiled as he messed about with the buttons on the cash register."Eh do you like wanna go, eh eat some food" Alex mumbled out and Jack blushed."You mean like a date?" The black haired boy asked and Alex nodded slightly watching Jack's face light up."Yeah, if you don't want to I understand" Alex said as Jack shook his head quickly."No I would love to, eh will I come to yours at-" Jack started but Alex cut in."No I'll pick up you at yours at seven" Alex said smiling as Jack wrote down his address on the small pad that was sitting on the counter."See you at eight!" Alex called as he walked out the shop and left Jack grinning like a mad man.