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All Is Lost


I've always been a sucker for post concert depression. I didn't mean to be frosty with Alex but I was always a sucker for this. Post concert depression is my worst enemy. It puts a damper on every good night!

When Alex arrived I handed him his coffee and we decided to make a move so that we'd catch Zack and Rian. Rian has decided it'll be a good idea for us to go golfing. Naturally he doesn't know Alex is coming. He held a bigger grudge then me against Lex.

Rian's always thought he's changed me. I went silent for a few weeks when I realised he was never going to call me or text me back again. No matter how many times my other friends tried, no one could live up to Alex's legacy, he made me who I was...

Not only that though... Back then... I had a slight crush on Alex... Well it was worse... I was in love with him, but he was my best friend so I never told him of course!

"Ri and Zee are at the golf course waiting for me. They don't know you're coming yet but they'll hopefully be happy to see you... If Rian holds a grudge then it's all my fault and I'm sorry, yeah?" He looked confused but nodded all the same. I have to try and remember I work with Alex now... Well at least for the foreseeable future.
"Why is it your fault?" I was kind of hoping he wouldn't ask.
"Well... When you left... I locked myself in my bathroom and tried to...um... overdose on paracetamol..." I know it's a stupid thing to have done! I ruined it all! Rian and Zack were so angry at me. I could tell, even after they tried to hide it.
"YOU DID WHAT!?" He stood in shock before continuing to walk in the direction of the golf course.
"I-It wasn't the same without you Alex. You were literally like my brother. Believe it or not I was closer to you then I was to him! You know what it's like to lose a family member Lex. It was hard for me to handle!" He sighed and looked at me with those perfect eyes.
"Jack, I can't believe you did that!" He hugged me. "i'm sorry Jacky. I didn't mean to put you through that! I missed you too but I didn't think you'd want to speak to me again after... The... Dispute.." He shook his head. "That was my fault too. I don't know why I even brought that bitch along with me." I smiled at him.
"It wasn't your fault Lexy... I was stupid and... Yeah..."

I opened the door to the golf club. Rian and Zack were waiting for me. I waved at them and smiled at Alex before charging over. "Hey guys! Guess who's assistant I am!?" I grinned as they both began to glare at me. "Alex Gaskarth! Remember him!?" He looked down at the floor and waved.
"Yeah, that fucker that ruined your life, Jack. How could we forget?" Rian frowned at me and Zack placed a hand on Rian's shoulder to prevent any... trouble. "What's he even doing here!?"
"I invited him. Like I said, we're working together at Dulaney. He just wanted to catch up, and we went to see Blink last night too. " I explained. Zack nodded and looked over at Rian.
"Rian chill. It's Jack's life. If he wants Alex back in it then let him have it that way." Zack turned to me. "Believe me though Jack, if this fucks up again we're not picking up the pieces." I nodded and Alex started to relax.
"Who want's to go play?" I grinned. They all nodded and Alex followed me to the counter.
"Jack..." He put his hand on my arm. Hey! That tingles! "Maybe I should... Go... I don't want to make things awkward!"
"Too late for that Alex, besides, I want you to stay so that I don't have to face the wrath of Rian." He laughed and nodded.

By the last hole we'd established that me and Alex still haven't moved on to the point scoring system. Where's the fun in that? After the initial awkwardness things died down. Rian and Alex were speaking normally and Zack was watching me around Alex the whole time. I can tell we're going to have some interesting conversations.


Omg this is amazing!!!