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All Is Lost


I can't believe Jack's done this!

After all that Alex did to him back then. Jack was hospitalised for fucks sake! It's not the best of occasions.

I watched one of my best friends slowly spiralling towards death! And when he finally gets over the bitch that caused his depression, he ends up working with him. Fucking great.

Next thing you know we'll be back to square one. Back to Jack in his hospital bed, crying, reaching out for his best friend. The nightmares, the trauma. I can guarantee me and Zack will be there, of course we will. No one else is going to want to pick up the pieces. No one else is going to want to get involved in this mess!

I don't want to be a part of it! Not again, I don't know if I can do it. Watch him suffer. Especially because it's Jack. It's out of character. He becomes his complete opposite.

I've lost count of the amount of times I've warned Jack.

I've told him so many times, I had to remind him of the heart break he suffered. I had to jog his memory on certain events. I remember it. I can remember it all. It was Zack and I who found Jack that first night. It was us who 'saved him'.

Flashback, 9th December 2003

"NO ALEX! I'M DONE WITH IT! I'M DONE WITH LYING TO YOU! TO ALL OF YOU!" Zack and I are standing in the hallway outside Jacks room. We've arrived later then Alex, It's not unusual. Those two have always been bosom buddies. The argument is loud. It's clear something has happened between them. They'll be fine by tomorrow they always are.

"WHAT JACK!? YOU EXPECT ME TO GO ON NORMALLY KNOWING THIS? WELL YOU CAN SHOVE IT UP YOUR FUCKING ARSE!" Or maybe not. Zack looked at me, his eyes said it all. He was scared, as was I. I don't know what the argument is about but they sound like a bickering couple. Never a good sign.

"LEAVE THEN ALEX! I DON'T CARE ANY MORE! I TOLD YOU THIS THINKING YOU'D GET IT! BUT YOU DON'T! EVER! I THOUGHT YOU GOT ME ALEX! YOU OBVIOUSLY DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT ME OR HOW I FEEL! Some friend you turned out to b-be!" I frowned and decided to enter. I opened the door and both of them were standing glaring at each other. Jack's eyes were red and tears were brimming. I walked over to him and Zack walked to Alex.
"What's going on?" I muttered to Jack. He started to cry silently and whispered against my shoulder.
"Make him leave... Please..." I nodded and directed Alex towards the door.
"Get out." I ordered flatly and he left. Unusual.


After the argument had died down and Alex was gone I led Jack over to his bed and sat him down. He cried for hours and explained everything. He told us about his secret.

He confessed his love for his best friend.

The best friend who left him after he'd shared a massive secret with him.

Ever since that night I've admired Jack's courage. It takes guts to tell someone something like that. It's a hard thing to admit and I get it.

Well not really..




Omg this is amazing!!!