Alex's POV

I was lent against Jack locker waiting for him and listening to my music.
I felt someone slap my arse hard and I turned round and pulled my earphones out my ears and looked at the person who was about a fucking good beating when I saw Jack with a big smile on his face.
"What you smiling about?" I asked.
"Still a little ninja." He chuckled.
"What do you expect when someone slapped your arse. You would shit yourself." I said and watched him as he put his stuff in his locker.
"Might do." He said and looked at me.
I shook my head and he shut his locker up and we walked back to mine.
"Wonder if the man friend is home." I said and looked at Jack as we walked out of school.
"Dunno, how you feeling anyway?" He asked.
"You know, feel like I'm about to lose it any minute now but I'm some how coping with it." I said.
"That's good then." He said quietly.
I pulled a cigarette out and started to smoke it.
"You and that disgusting habit." Jack chuxkled.
"Without it I'm would be fucking loopy." I said.
Jack just rolled his eyes at me.

We got home and man friend was home.
"Anyone would think it was his fucking house." I said as I walked in the door.
"Don't do anything Alex." Jack said as a warning and glared at me.
"I just want a fucking tea, fucking hell, do I need to ask for your permission now?" I said and glared at him.
He shook his head and went in the sitting room.
"Alright Eric?" Jack asked.
I left them too it and went to the kitchen and sure enough man friend and mother was out there.
"Excuse me while I fucking puke." I said and put the kettle on.
"Alex what is the matter with you?" Mum asked.
"Don't fucking act like you care, because you don't." I snapped.
"Don't speak to your mother like that." Mam friend said.
"Who the bloody hell are you to tell me what I can and can't do. Your not my fucking dad, I don't even know why your fucking here." I said loudly and Jack came out.
"You don't speak to me like that." He said and got up put of his chair.
"Or what? What the fuck are you going to do with me?" I challenged.
"Alex stop it." Jack said.
I ignored him.
"Give you some discipline because that's what you need." He said.
"Well you can go fuck yourself. Your not my dad so you have no right to tell me what I can and can't do." I said.
"While I'm here you will listen to me." He said.
"While your here I'm going to make your life hell and that's a promise." I said and walked out the room.

Jack got hold of my hand.
"You okay?" Jack asked.
I pulled my hand out of his hold and moved around because I couldn't stay still.
"I'm going in fucking sane with him in this fucking house." I said.
"You have to cool it a little, I know its hard because there is some sort of clash between you two but you have to try and get along." He said.
"I can't Jack, there is something about him which I don't like." I said and walked in a circle a little.
"Explain to me I don't understand what you mean." He said quietly.
"Not here, their listening they always listen." I said and saw mum and man friend standing by the kitchen door.
I got hold of his hand and we went to the river.

---

Jacks POV

I never did understand how Alex managed to find this river but he did and he always went here if he didn't want to be found by anyone but me.

"What do you mean there's something which you don't like him?" I asked because I am really confused what he meant by that.
"He reminds me off him. His eyes, his build, his features, it reminds me of him." He said and looked out towards the river.
"The person who raped you?" I asked.
"Yeah, but its not him but everything about him looks and reminds me off him." He said.
We sat in silence for a while before Alex spoke.

"It changes you. You know, I wasn't mess yeah I was still fucking fucked but not as bad as I am now." He said quietly.
"Too actually be able to trust people who aren't your family. To actually be able to go through the day and not think about how disgusting and dirty you are." He said.
"Your not dirty or disgusting." I said quietly.
He looked at me and then looked down.
"I am Jacky. I mean I should of known he was taking advantage of me. But I didn't Jack, I thought I was special or something you know. But he fucking used me like I was a peice of shit on his shoe." He said and threw a stone in the river.
"People do stupid things when you think your something." I said.
"You don't understand Jack." He said quietly.
"Then help me understand. I want to know what goes through your head, I want to help you Alex." I said and stood next to him.
He looked at me.
"You don't wanna know what goes on in my head." He said quietly.
I pulled him into a hug.
"I don't want to go home, not with him there. I don't trust him." He said.
"Do you trust me?" I asked and looked at him.
He pulled back and looked at me.
"Course I do." He said.
"Go home with me and spend one night with him there. If you don't like it then we can go to mine and we can stay there." I said.
He sighed.
"Okay." He whispered.
"Come on its cold and its getting dark and I'm starving." I said.
Alex chuckled and linked his hand with mine and we slowly made our way back to his.

Bailey was still there.
We got in and Alex went straight upstairs and shut the bedroom door behind him which he never does so he must be uncomfortable with Bailey being here.
"Hey Jacko, where's Alex?" Freddie said from the kitchen door.
"Hey, he's in his room." I said .
"What's the matter with him Jack?" He asked.
I got hold of his arm and dragged him upstairs and took him to his room.
"Steady on Jack you have Alex to do this." he said.
"Alex, what was he like in England?" I asked.
"He was your normal 11 year until it happened then he became how he is now part from he's a bit happier now he has you." He said and looked at me.
"What's wrong with him?" He asked.
"Man friend, Alex says he looks like the person who raped him." I said quietly.
Fred sighed.
"He does look like him. But there's a clash with them as well, normally Alex isn't like how he acts round people he doesn't know, normally he keeps himself away from them." He said.
"Alex will get him out this house. He did with one of Erics girlfriends he hated her and she hated him, let's just say that relationship didn't last very long." He chuckled.
I smiled.
"You just have to keep an eye on him, if he doesn't like him being here then he'll run off until man friend goes then he'll come back." He said.
"He doesn't like him here, which I why I said for him to spend a night here and if the still does t like it then me and him will go to mine and stay there until he fucks off." I said.
"At least I know someone is with him and he has somewhere to stay." He said quietly.
I smiled.
"I'm going to check on Alex." I said.

Me and Alex was cuddling watching films and pigging out on what goodies we had hiding under the bed.
"I can't be off my meds, not when he's in the house." He said.
"Have them if you feel that you got to have them." I said quietly.
"Not now though, I'm comfy and he's still down there and your being a really good heater." He said and kissed my chest.
I chuckled.

We watched about 3 films and when I looked Alex was asleep.
I pulled the covers over him a bit more and I got comfy and watched the rest of this film and went to sleep.

Notes

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