Third Times A Charm

I sighed as I looked out of the window of the bus. It wasn't that I didn't enjoy my job because I did, it was one of the few things that really kept me going. I just couldn't stand to see my kids like that. One day they would understand that it was just as hard for me. That hearing them cry and looking into the teary eyes of my fiance is the hardest thing I can do.

"Jacky, you alright," Matt asked.

"Yeah. It's still hard," I whispered.

"Will it ever be easy? You are leaving the people you love with the hope that you will return. In the hope that they will wait. I don't mean to sound cynical but sometimes they aren't patient. Sometimes they can't wait through this hectic lifestyle. Alex seems like he's in love with you though, you shouldn't have to worry. He said yes didn't he? It may never be easy but you should go home to a loving family. Think of them and we'll be home in no time."

"Matt, what if Andy comes back and he realizes he loves Andy more than me. What if he realizes he'd rather be with him than me because I did worse than Andy."

"That's a risk you were willing to take once you got Alex back. He loves you Jack. We all make mistakes, he overlooked yours. You need to overlook all of your mistakes too. Move on. You fucked up but without that you wouldn't have two beautiful kids who think you hung the moon and a soon to be husband who thinks the same."

"Do they really?"

Matt scoffed and stared at me, dumbfounded. He put his forehead into his hand, shaking his head at my apparent stupidity.

"In a month and a half go home and actually pay attention. You'll see I'm not lying," he said.

I stood up and walked to the front of the bus. I looked around and saw that it was empty. That means that no one would see. No one would know. I could just break one promise and no one other than me and God would know. I went into the fridge and pulled out a beer, opening the tab carefully. I could taste the poison passing my lips. Maybe this would cure my wondering mind.

Notes

Sorry this isn't a long update and that it took a while. I will be doing all updates from my phone until further notice because my computer is acting up so updates will be short. Also, what the fuck Jack!

Leave a comment and rate if you enioy :)

-Jess