Can't Help Who I Fall For

“Dude, I can’t believe you skipped out on school yesterday,” Zack blurted out, a bit too loudly for my liking as he stretched out on my bed, forcing Rian to get up and move to sit on my computer chair. He folded his arms, muttering something under his breath about Zack needing to learn a thing or two about personal space.

“Shut up,” I hissed, glancing up at Zack from where I was slumped down on my bean bag chair on the floor before turning my attention back to tuning the guitar that was sitting in my lap. “My parents might actually kill me if they ever find out... and it was just one class, chill.”

Zack just giggled and rolled his eyes. “I don’t even know how you managed to get away with it.”

I smiled at that. “Alex said it was something about ‘Gaskarth charm.’”

“Oh yeah, that’s a real thing,” Rian piped up, looking over at me and Zack in turn.

“Yeah?” I asked, cocking my head to the side as I urged him to continue.

“Like, he is seriously the smoothest bullshitter I have ever met.” Rian shrugged. “One time, we all missed the first hour of practice, and he managed to successfully convince everyone that we were on time and were actually early. I honestly don’t know how he does it.”

I laughed at his story and gripped my guitar as it slipped out of my grasp. “That is either going to be a very good thing in our relationship or a very bad thing,” I grinned. Relationship—I am in a relationship with Alexander Gaskarth. I was still not entirely convinced that it wasn't some very realistic inception-style dream. I mean, finding fifty dollars? Getting together with your crush who just so happens to be one of the most popular guys in school? Getting away with skipping class? It had to be a dream, right? Whatever. Even if it was a dream, I wasn't exactly in a hurry to wake up from it.

“Jack,” Rian called, waving his hand in my direction to further gain my attention. “You brain-dead or something?”

“Wh-what?” I asked, blinking up at him and feeling a little dazed after being pulled from my thoughts.

“He’s alive!” Rian chuckled. “Zack asked you a question.”

“Oh, s-sorry, can you repeat it?” I asked, pushing my fingers through my hair, causing it to stick up at random angles. “I zoned out.”

Zack laughed again, “Were you thinking about your new boyfriend?” he asked in a teasing tone, causing a light shade of pink to engulf my cheeks.

“Busted,” Rian said, and I rolled my eyes, trying my best to ignore the fact that I was blushing just because I had been caught thinking about Alex. He didn't even have to be there to get me nervous.

“I asked why Alex’s charm would be a bad thing. Surely it could only be a good thing that he has a way with words?” Zack shrugged.

I put my guitar down, contemplating the question for a moment.

“Well, if he can talk his way out of anything, what if he uses it to hide stuff from me? Or to stop me from being mad if he messes up? Or makes me feel like it was really my fault if something bad happens?” I responded, chewing nervously on my bottom lip. Where did these trust issues even come from? They never seemed to be there when I’m was actually with him.

“Jeez,” Rian said, holding his hand out to stop me from talking. “Jack, you need to slow down.” He moved to sit down on the floor beside me, putting his hand on my shoulder in a comforting manner. “Alex wouldn’t treat you like that; he’s a nice guy. Where are these thoughts coming from?”

I shrugged, training my eyes down on the floor, “I dunno… I never even consider anything like that when he’s actually around. I just… when I’m not with him, I think this is all gonna turn out to be like one big practical joke or something. Like he’ll just leave and I’ll get hurt,” I mumbled, not quite able to bring myself to meet Rian or Zack’s eyes.

Zack was instantly down by my side, wrapping his arms around me.

“You can’t think like that, Jack,” he said softly. “Has he given you any reason to ever have to think like that? I mean, it's only been a few days, but still…”

I thought for a moment and then shook my head. “You’re right, it’s too early to even be thinking about things like that.” I sighed and finally looked up at them. “Y’know, I actually saw his jealous side yesterday,” I added with a chuckle. “I mean, I know jealousy isn’t exactly a good thing, but it made me feel like he actually wanted me and was scared that he might lose me.”

“What happened?” Rian frowned. “That doesn’t sound like him.”

“His friend Oli invited me to have lunch with them, and I figured Alex would be there, too,” I began, “but he wasn’t there and after a few minutes, he came and got me so he could take me to this Italian diner.” I glanced over at Rian. “I didn’t think you guys were close. How would you know if he was the jealous type or not?”

“We spend a lot of time together; we’re on the same team.” Rian rolled his eyes.

“Oh, yeah...” I mused. “Uh, anyway, he told me that he didn’t want to lose me to another British pretty boy.” I smiled.

“Well, there you go!” Zack smiled. “You obviously have nothing to worry about. He’s totally into you.”

Rian chuckled and nodded in agreement, looking at the ground and playing with the rug.

“Uh, you okay, Ri?” I asked, a bit too nervously.

His face broke into a smile. “Yeah, everything’s good. I just can’t wait to make fun of him for getting all jealous.” Zack looked at him suspiciously, eyeing him up and down. I ignored it, though, thinking he was just trying to be funny and focused more on Rian’s comment.

“Do not tell him I told you!” I yelled. “He’ll kill me if he finds out! Please, Ri, you can’t embarrass him.” I whined and jumped on top of him, pinning him down. I knew Rian could easily overpower me, but shit, I needed his word.

“Dude, chill out.” Rian laughed, pushing me off of him. “I won’t say a word, I was just messing with you.”

“O-oh,” I chuckled nervously and climbed up onto the bed, taking advantage of the fact that Zack had moved onto the floor. “I guess that’s okay then.”

I reached into my pocket as I felt it vibrate, grinning as I opened up my message from Alex.

Hey, angel, I miss you. Come over?

I giggled and tapped out a response.

Babe, I’ve barely seen Rian and Zack recently. I miss you, too, though.

I had only just managed to put my phone away before it vibrated again.

So can I come over then?

I laughed and quickly replied to let him know that yes, he could come over. “Alex will be over soon.”

“That’s cool. I need to talk to him about something,” Rian said, and I narrowed my eyes.

“About what?”

“Sports stuff, you wouldn’t understand.” Rian grinned.

“You need to tell us about your date!” Zack said suddenly. “He’ll be here soon, and you have to tell us everything.”

“It wasn’t a date.” I laughed. “It was lunch at a diner.” I shrugged before beginning to tell them about what had happened.

“Did you already see something you like, Lex?” I asked. I’d been staring down at the menu for the last ten minutes. Italian wasn’t something I was exactly a fan of, unless you counted pizza.

“I’m looking at something I like right now,” Alex replied, winking over at me, and I felt my cheeks turn red.

“Oh, you’re so smooth.” Franceschi smirked at Alex. “Did you hear that guys?”

Alex rolled his eyes. “Okay, fuck off, guys. Seriously, get your own booth.”

“Or what?” Franceschi challenged. “Are we knocking you off your game?”

“I swear to God, leave us alone or I won’t cover for why you’ll be missing next period."

Everyone grumbled at that, but nevertheless, filed out to find somewhere else to sit, and Alex moved around so he was sitting down beside me.

“You didn’t have to do that,” I whispered, but I was kind of glad he did. Alex’s friends could be a little overwhelming at times.

“That’s okay, angel.” He smiled. “You should try the pasta. I think you’ll love it.”

I looked over at him and smiled, leaning in to press a soft kiss to his forehead. “Pick for me.”

Alex nodded and waved the waitress over, ordering for both of us before reaching under the table, taking hold of my hand.

I smiled softly and laced our fingers together, looking down at our hands for just a second before looking back up at my boyfriend.

“You give me butterflies sometimes,” I said in a small voice. “Well, a lot of the time, really.”

Alex laughed. “You’re adorable. You know that, right?” he asked me.

I just nodded and smiled at him again. “If that’s what you tell me, it’s what I believe.”

“Oh,” Alex smirked. “That’s a really good decision, babe. You’re definitely bringing the adorable factor to this relationship.”

I groaned and flipped my hair slightly so it fell over my eyes. “You’re embarrassing me...”

Alex giggled and reached out, pushing the hair out of my eyes before leaning in and kissing me again. Yeah. Those butterflies had come back with a vengeance.

I kissed him back, loving the way our lips slotted almost perfectly together.

He pulled away far too soon for my liking, I had to mentally remind myself that we were supposed to be taking it slow. But when I’m actually with Alex, it becomes so much harder for me to stick to that promise.

“What are you thinking about, Jay?” Alex asked me, winding his arm around my waist.

“You,” I answered honestly, leaning into him.

Alex quirked his eyebrow. “What about me?”

“I just like the way I feel when I’m around you,” I said softly and this time, Alex was the one who blushed before kissing me again.

“That was totally a date!” Zack grinned when I finished recounting the story, looking up at him.

“Yeah, it sure was,” I heard Alex(?) say, and my head snapped up to look at him. He was leaning against the door frame, looking fairly pleased with himself. My eyes grew wide like a deer in the headlights.

“How… how long have you been standing there?” He smiled.

“Long enough to hear you talking about how much you like kissing me,” he teased, and I sunk down lower on the bed, wishing the world could just swallow me up. “Why? Did I miss any of the good stuff, angel?” he asked, and I couldn’t help the grin that spread across my lips at the nickname.

I shook my head and motioned for him to come and join me on the bed.

“Promise?” he asked as he sat down on the bed, curling his legs up underneath himself. “I’d hate to think you were talking about me and not to me.”

“Don’t worry,” Zack piped up again. “He only said good things. Believe me—we had to put up with him throughout the whole crush stage.”

“Zack, shut up!” I whined. “You’re gonna scare him away.” I pouted.

“Don’t worry, babe.” Alex smiled reassuringly at me. “My friends haven’t scared you away yet; I think we’re good.”

Notes