Can't Help Who I Fall For

“Franceschi, open the god damn door!” I called from Josh's front porch, continually banging on the door in hopes he'd move his lazy ass a little faster. I knew his parents had gone somewhere for the next two weeks, so I didn't really care how loud and obnoxious I got. The neighbors were probably used to me and my ways by now as it is.

“I'm coming, wanker!” he eventually called back, sounding a little exasperated. The door was pulled open a few seconds later, Josh tilting his head and cocking an eyebrow expectantly.

“Good to see you, too, Princess,” I greeted, pushing past him and making my way up to his room. “Anyone else here?”

“Yeah, Ramsay and Alix-with-an-i,” he answered, following me down the hall and up the stairs towards his room.

“What, were you all too busy with your daily three-way to answer the door for me?” I asked with a smirk as I walked into his room, immediately seeing Ramsay sprawled out on Franceschi's bed, Alix in a similar position on the floor at the foot of the bed, the only difference being that Ramsay was on his stomach and Alix was on his back.

“Damn straight we were; I had to knock Alix off of me so I could answer the door for your fat ass,” he scoffed, causing the other two to turn and look up at us.

“How would a gay three-way even work?” I pondered aloud, simply wanting to see who'd be the first to answer.

“Well,” Alix spoke up, “it could sorta be like a conga line, you know? My dick would be in Franceschi, Franceschi's dick would be in Ramsay, and Ramsay would have to grind into the bed because there wouldn't really be a way for us to get to his dick. Unless we did it doggy style or against a wall or something. Hey, Ramsay could even be on his back, who knows.”

“Or,” Ramsay cut in, “it could be like Franceschi sixty-nining with me, and Alix on top of Franceschi.”

“It sounds like you've both put quite a bit of thought into this,” I teased as I walked over to the bed and sat on Ramsay's back, watching as his eyes bulged and he started gasping for air, Franceschi going to lean against the wall next to the door. “Are you sure you're all straight?”

“Who hasn't thought about having sex with all of this, though?” Franceschi pondered, gesturing at all of himself. “You know you want all of this... this... sex appeal,” he enunciated this with a quick thrust of his hips and grab of his crotch.

“I'd really rather not,” I said with a chuckle as I moved off of Ramsay's back, laying on my side next to him.

“You really are a fat ass,” Ramsay finally choked out, causing me to frown.

“I'm not fat; that's all muscle,” I countered, shaking my head as I attempted to roll onto my other side in the small amount of space I had to see him properly.

“Muscle that you should try to lose at the gym,” he huffed, jutting out his bottom lip to blow his blonde and blue-streaked hair from where it was hanging in front of his face. “I don't even know how you're still on the football team with all that.” He reached out to poke at my stomach and I shoved him off of the bed, causing Franceschi and Alix to crack up uncontrollably.

“I'm not fat,” I grumbled, rolling my eyes as I scooted along the bed to at least make sure he was okay. He didn't move from where he was now on his back, instead simply glaring up at me.

“I don't know, I think you could go for losing a few pounds, Gaskarth,” Alix chirped.

“You know, I heard an hour of vigorous, hardcore sex is good for that, if you want to join us,” Franceschi interjected before I could say something back to Monster—his last name was far too hard for any of us to properly pronounce. Seriously, Koochaki? If he wants to be addressed as Monster, who the fuck cares, as long as we don't constantly have to attempt his real name.

“Oh, you know, I'd really love to, but I kind of can't, actually,” I said with a sigh, feigning a mix of hurt and upset.

“Why not?” Ramsay's voice came from the floor beside me, and I turned to see him pouting playfully.

“Because I have a boyfriend now,” I replied, sticking my tongue out at him.

“You haven't asked me out yet,” Alix contradicted, pushing himself up on his elbows so that he could sort of see me a bit better.

“Well, I already knew you wouldn't say no to a date with me,” I replied with a smirk as well as a wink. “Seriously, though, I can't participate in your sexual fantasies about me anymore.”

“Who is it then?” Franceschi inquired, sliding down the wall so he was sitting against it.

“You know, I may be a fat ass, but I can change that; you can't change the fact that you're a dumb ass,” I pointed out, shaking my head in slight disbelief. “Guess.”

“It's me, guys,” Ramsay called, lifting his hand to wave it frantically around in the air as Franceschi zoned out on us.

“I do honestly question your sexuality,” I mumbled with a sigh.

“The day you stop is the day we quit.” Alix shrugged, grinning widely.

“Wait,” I heard Franceschi gasp, his eyes widening as his gaze came back into focus on my face, “is it that Jack kid you like? The one I was talking to earlier?”

“Yeah, it is, and you're damn lucky he likes me back, or I would've honestly come over to rip your dick off,” I said with a glare, though it was rather halfhearted.

“Do you think Oli's gonna do anything to him?” Alix mused worriedly, biting at his bottom lip in contemplation.

“What do you mean? Why would he do anything to Jack?” I asked a little baffled.

“Well, you have to think about it,” Ramsay started, “Oli doesn't like you as it is, and I'm not sure if he's homophobic or not, but once he finds out that you and Jack are dating now, he'll probably do something to him since he can't do anything to you, considering you're like the most popular guy in school, and quarterback; the coaches would get him expelled for fucking with you. Besides, Jack isn't, like, popular or anything. As far as I know, those other two guys on the football team, Rian and Zack or something, are his only friends. I could be wrong, though. I think he has a few friends who are girls. Cassadee, Tay and Hayley, if I'm correct.”

“I know he's friends with Rian,” I said with a nod, “but how do you know so much about him if he isn't popular?”

“Do you really doubt my skills? I know everything about everyone,” he stated rather proudly.

“This is the last time I'm going to ask you: are you absolutely positive you aren't gay? Not even just a little bit?” Alix pushed, scooting back on the floor to be able to see all three of us clearly.

“Bitch, I might be.”

“What?” Alix asked, seeming a bit confused.

“D-d-d-d-d-did I stutter?” Ramsay sang out, shaking his hips along to the beat in his head as best he could.

“So you are then?” he inquired curiously.

“The day you all stop questioning me will be the day I quit,” Ramsay answered, nonchalantly taking Alix's words.

“Gaskarth, you're part gay, you must have a gaydar or something, right? Is Ramsay gay or not?” Franceschi joked, but I think a piece of him both one, believed that I had some built in gaydar and two, that I'd just magically be able to tell. Even if I could, I don't think I'd tell anyone; coming out is difficult and something you can only do when you feel comfortable with it yourself.

“I don't know. It's hard to tell with him, but my 'gaydar' goes crazy when I'm near you,” I teased, hearing Alix and Ramsay begin to chuckle. “Oh, don't even get me started on Monster, though. Through the roof when we're in at least ten feet of each other. I can't believe I haven't exploded into a pile of glitter and rainbows yet. There's too much gay in this room for me to handle at once. Honestly, I think Ramsay is the straightest out of all of us, and with that, I will be departing before I do quite literally explode. Actually, I don't think I'd explode, it'd be more like a stampede of unicorns would burst from my gut. Seriously, though, I'll see you guys later.”

I hopped from the bed and gave them each a wave and blown kiss before leaving the room and heading downstairs to my car. When I was comfortable enough in the front seat, I took out my phone and opened up a new text instead of driving towards my house.

Hey, angel.

Hi, um... pumpkin? was Jack's reply and I couldn't help but smile at how adorable that was.

Why pumpkin?

I don't know, it was the first thing I thought of, so why not? I mean, I could probably work on pet names if you don't like it or something?

It's cute. I assured, still smiling cheekily as I finally backed out of Franceschi's driveway. I was just wondering what you were up to?

I was avoiding homework, and staring at the ceiling was exhausting, so I was just gonna go to bed. Why? What are you up to? I read as I drove down the road, thankful of the fact that it was now quarter past ten and the roads were deserted.

I just left Franceschi's, and I wanted to talk to you, but I guess it can wait until tomorrow. I texted back as I pulled up to a stop sign.

Franceschi? was his immediate reply, and I couldn't help but wonder if he was getting jealous.

Josh Franceschi; you met him earlier. We all call him Franceschi because we have another Josh, who we call Ramsay. We also have an Alix, so we call him Monster and I'm Gaskarth. I'll introduce you to them and all of my other friends tomorrow, alright?

I don't know... What if they don't like me?

They'll like you because I like you. I reasoned, hoping that'd be enough to convince him.

Fine, if you say so.

Good, because I do say so. I'll talk to you tomorrow, okay? Now go get some sleep, angel, I'll see you in the morning.

Night, Lex.

Night, Jay.

Notes

lmao this is so bad oh gOd
i'm like not even able to restrain myself from editing everything that i catch as i go through it