Thanks To You!
Alex walked out the bathroom and left me to my thoughts. I didn’t want to get up and chase him away more, so I’ll let him rest before I tell him what and how I feel. I can’t have him be mad at me for years but I guess he already is...
I finally got myself up from the floor and exited the bathroom. When I opened the door, I saw Melody standing there staring towards me, a mean glare at that.
‘Don't hurt my dad. Not again. I don't think be can take anymore heart breaks from you.’ She said.
I stayed quiet, she stared at me for what felt like the longest time but as I went to walk away, she grabbed my arm and pulled me back.
‘My father loves you so much Jack. What are you going to do about that?’ she asked.
‘I’m going to prove to him that I love him too.’ I replied before pulling myself away.
I walked down the stairs towards the kitchen where I thought would find Alex sitting but instead, he was in the lounge talking with others. I felt my body tense up. I froze. I stared to him and just watched his actions. He was laughing and smiling, and he looked genuinely happy with his life now. If I went near him, I’d ruin his night.
I stayed for a while, watching life happen around a duel mind, before I finally decided that I was going to leave. I stood up, cleaned up a little and left without anyone noticing. I walked for about 25 minutes before I got home.
The new house was smaller than my older one, as it was just me living with myself and my thoughts. I brought a 2-bedroom, 2 bathroom house, hoping that Alex and Melody would move into the house with me one day, it’s a matter of convincing Alex that I’m worth his love.
Walking in, I walked to the study and took a seat at the desk. Lyrics were scattered everywhere across it. For the past three years, I have been trying to figure out how to tell Alex what he meant to me, and how much I love him. It was all a blur up until about a year ago. I was going through old school boxes when I found sheet paper. On it was lyrics, the song Alex wrote for me after we broke up that first time.
Oh, Calamity. The song represents what has occurred, and how much I fucked up everything between Alex and me. Alex wants to be with me, but after everything, after all my relationships and how bad they were, I can’t trust myself to fall in love again. Although, I am already in love and have been for the past 14 years of my entire life.
As I sat and contemplated this, words started spraying onto the paper. Words that could be written into a song, a way for me to express everything. Love. Gratitude. Trust.
The entire night was full of re-writes, making every word meant something, sounded right and was ready for me to present to Alex the next morning. Upon finishing, I ran to the closet in the hallway and removed my guitar which has been sitting in my closet for the last 4 years. I couldn’t bare to play ever since the sentencing.
As I looked at the time, it was 4am which meant if I set an alarm for 9am, I’d get 5 hours sleep before it is go time. the real way to prove to him what he means to me. a promise to not break his heart and a way to show him that I am ready to commit. I grabbed two boxes of picks from the closet before heading to my bedroom to rest up for my big moment.
I sat awake the entire night but when I heard Melody heading my way in the morning, you bet I pretended to be asleep, so she could ‘wake’ me up for the first time in years. She yelled as she jumped on me, having an element of surprise. I jumped and opened my eyes and looked at my sweet girl. She had the biggest smile on her face, a shine in her eyes and a pep in my step. The happiest I have seen her in 4 years. Which made me the happiest I have felt for a long time.
Mum had made pancakes the smell was beginning to drift into my room.
‘Come Dad, breakfast is ready!’ she said, moving off me and running away. I slowly got up, dressed slightly and patted my way out. In the kitchen, mountains of pancakes had formed. Icing sugar had formed topping snow and berries surrounded the edges of poking out pancakes for trees.
‘You, my darling daughter, are so creative!’ I said taking a seat at the table. A fresh breakfast, a free breakfast was the beginning of a beautiful day with my daughter. First thing on the agenda, Melody’s favourite movies in our pjs, at home.
We ate, brushed our teeth and brushed our hair before heading back to the couch where we sat for the next two hours for the first movie.
All was going well until the doorbell rang. Melody paused the movie as I walked to the door. Upon opening, I held my breath to see Jack standing there with a guitar strapped to his back, a bunch of brightly coloured flowers in one hand and a teddy bear in the other that read, ‘I’m sorry.’
‘Alex… I need to talk to you.’
9 months and I finally have time to write and post a small ass chapter.
I have two chapters left, hopefully much longer and detailed to come and for sure in the new year!
I guess if you have been waiting out for this, I am so sorry. for those who are new, hello. those gone, goodbye. my motivation to write has come back, after a long time disappearing. i hope someone is enjoying it. whether new or old.
Thanks for now. I will be back 3rd Jan 2019 to upload the next chapter.