Matt stood looking at Alex and I with a confused worried expression on his face,
“Tell me what?” he pushed repeating the question his eyes narrow as I look up at Alex for some sort of guidance.
“Matt, why don’t you take Rina downstairs and I’ll join you both in a second to help her explain this complicated situation.” Alex keeps hit eyes locked in mine as he speaks, I nod and reluctantly step forward to follow Matt down into the living room where Rian and Jack sit In the same place. I slide into the spot on the end of the couch away from Jack, Matt sits in the armchair.
“What’s going on?” Rian looks at the two of us confused.
“I guess you’ll see in a second.” I murmer just loud enough for him to hear, not completely sure Rian and Jack should be here for this.
“Is everything okay at least?” he looks at me concerned,
“I…” I pause “I’m not sure.” I lock eyes with him as I feel Alex’s hand on my shoulder as my rescuing force,
“Yes it is.” Alex plasters a smile on his face but is obviously not at all pleased. He takes the seat next to me and forces me to sit in the middle of the couch. He slides a smooth, cool item into my hand. The test, I slide it to sit in my lap while I look for words to explain.
“I…” my lips don’t seem to be working, Alex starts to rub my back in hopes of comforting me. “When I was in the hospital, the nurse… she gave me this.” I lick my lips trying to focus and keep myself together, stop myself from being stupid. “They didn’t run any tests on it because I was dressed when Alex found me, but.” I feel my eyes brim over as a tear slides down my cheek,
“Come on, just tell him.” Alex whispers in my ear encouraging me.
“Matthew.” I look down and throw the test on the table, “Matt, I’m pregnant.” I look down and close my eyes taking a deep breath, I slide my hand over to touch Alex’s thigh in the silence to be sure that I didn’t just fall through a hole and disappear. Alex’s hand rests on mine. I dare to open my eyes and look up at Alex who looks at me with a saddened expression on his face, my eyes run over to Rian who looks at me wide eyed his mouth half open like he’s trying to say something.
I look over to Jack whose mouth actually hangs open with shock, his hand reaches out to touch me, wanting to comfort me. I blush looking down at his hand. Alex squeezes my hand and looks over to me then looks over to Matt whose face has gone pale white. His eyes lock on my stomach,
“That night at the club?” His jaw is locked and his fists are clenched until his knuckles are white.
“Yes.” Alex nods at him, “And Matthew, I know how religiously like abortion is not accepted and stuff-”
“Alex. Shut UP!” Matthew snaps standing up throwing the test on the ground, which apparently he picked up off the table. “This is not fucking okay!” He snaps and walks over to the doorway only pausing to punch the wall before disappearing out the door into the night. Alex squeezes my hand and my hart drops to my stomach. It feels like the punch was directed directly into my stomach.
“It’s okay.” I feel Alex’s lips against my temple. I turn to hide my face in his neck not wanting to have the guys all see this way he wraps his arms around me tightly.
“I uh…” Rian nods and stands up, “I should go… I should get him.” The weight of the couch shifts under me,
“Okay, You should take Jack with you, split up and cover more ground or something.” I wait before I hear the front door close again to let go of myself. My chest rips open letting sobs escape my lips. How could this be happening? To me of all people? How did I end up with the child of a man I don’t know the name of? Why do I have to be given the wonderful opportunity of living with my brother and to purse my dream only to have it taken away by one bad drink? Alex rubs my back trying to comfort me.
“Hey, It’s okay. Everything is going to be perfect, don’t worry about Matt, he’s just shocked. He still loves you, this is just his way of handling things.” I sigh and wrap my arms around his waist not wanting to let go. “I’m here for you Rina. No matter what happens. I promise you. No matter what.” Another sob rips through my chest.
“Alex please.” I pull away from him and wipe my eyes, “Don’t say that.” I swallow hard and take deep breaths to calm myself.
“Why not?” He looks at me confused, as if the obvious isn’t there.
“Because you can’t be there for me Alex.” I groan and push my hair out of my face, “I know you’re going to leave.” He sighs and pulls me back into a hug but into a laying position.
“You mean on tour right?” He smiles a little bit at me.
“Yeah.” I frown and look down when I feel his forehead touch mine.
“Don’t worry about it Rina. Everything will be perfect. Just wait.” His words calm me as well as his touch. I relax into him letting him hold me. After a few minutes he starts to hum a unfamiliar tune lulling me to sleep.

Notes

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