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A Handful of Moments

Air

“I promised her I’d be there! Don’t make me break that promise!” Alex’s voice carried into the living room where I sat my head in my hands. It feels like my brain is pounding out of my head. This is what I do to my brother, just one night and I flawlessly ruin one of his best friendships. Well not quite flawlessly. I got pregnant and now my entire world is going to change.
“Well you shouldn’t be making promises you can’t keep then!” Matt shouts angrily. It feels like a blow to my gut. I might be the only woman in the world that has ever hoped for a miscarriage. Get rid of this baby and this whole thing would be so much less complicated.
“I’m so sorry Rina.” Jack stands by the end of the couch. I jump up to my feet startled.
“Get the fuck away from me then!” I can’t recognize the voice. I don’t care to. I hold the breath in my chest. I need this all to stop. I don’t want to listen to this anymore.
“….Rina?” Jack looks at me concerned as I perform the little trick it took me several years to master. I close my eyes.
***
“Rina!” Matt’s voice sounds hysterical, I can’t tell where it’s coming from.
“We have to bring her to the hospital!” a pair of hands grab at me pulling me up.
“No. She’ll be okay in a minute.”
“SHE PASSED OUT!”
“She does it all the time! You might know that if you were her brother. Or mattered in her life!”
“GUYS! Priorities. Zack please carry her upstairs. We can figure it out then.”
“I can do it.” My eyes drag open to see Alex leaning over me his eyes wide, his mouth hangs partially open as he looks down at me. One of his hands on my hip the other on the back of my neck. “She’s waking up.” He announces, Zack, Jack and Matt stand around me. I seem to be lying on the couch.
“Rina.” Matthew exhales loudly “Seriously?” his hand runs through his hair. My head spins from the lack of oxygen I just experienced.
“What the fuck is going on here?” Zack looks at Matt and I with the most confused look on his face.
“She used to do this all the time.” Matt groans and turns to the kitchen his expression changed to that of annoyance.
“Faint?” Alex calls after him his eyes still locked on mine.
“Pass out from lack of oxygen.” My lips feel dry and crusty as I speak.
“You held your breath?” He groans and drops his forehead to rest on my chest,
“People can do that?” Jack whispers to Zack,
“I’ve heard of it before I guess, I’ve never seen it I don’t think…” Zack manages to speak a little quieter but I think any of these guys are just terrible at whispering.
“Is this really the best time?” Matthew snaps clearly irritated. “Just, can you all leave for a minute, I need to speak to my sister alone.” My heart aches inside of my chest when I look up at his facial expression. I should have stopped before I passed out. I shouldn’t have done that but if I hadn’t they’d be on the floor again probably. I feel Alex push up off of me, though I don’t pay attention to anyone else besides my brother who watches me clearly distressed.
“Rina…” He sighs and walks around the couch, I pull myself to a sitting position awkwardly and make room for him on the couch near my feet.
“Matt. We don’t need to have this conversation.” I sigh and tear my eyes off of him to look at my lap.
“I think we do. Rina, you can’t do this crap to yourself. You know how that can cause brain damage.”
“I didn’t mean-” my lips quiver as I speak making my voice sound frail.
“You have more then one life to look after right now whether we like it or not.” His voice hightens as he speaks, “You’re a single teenage rape victim mother and you can’t do stupid shit like this. You need to be more responsible! That night at the club just proves that you can hardly take care of yourself! Let alone a child!” Matt begins to shout nearer to the end of his speech. My heart falls in my chest.
“Matthew… I know I’m your little sister and you’ll always see me as that. But I’m not going to be alone.” My words are dry and my voice remains in a monotone. All that’s going through my head is how Alex promised me. “I have people to support me and you know I’m mature. You know that I can handle a kid I just wish you didn’t have to take out your shit on me the way mom used to when she was pissed.” I work my way to my feet only feeling slightly lightheaded.
“Rina..” Matthew sighs,
“You need to sort your shit out with Alex. In a reasonable mature way. As of today I can’t seriously listen to you about maturity.”
“Let me ask you-”
“I don’t want to listen to you anymore Matt.” I snap feeling my cheeks get hot already,
“One question Rina. Please.” I feel his hand on my back,
“One.”
“Who is the support you have. Someone who is mature enough to be that support.” He speaks clearly trying to make up for the earlier harshness.
“Ale-” I start
“I said someone who is responsible.” I can’t take it anymore. I step forward leaving him behind. I don’t need to listen to this. I just need space.

Notes

Hey you guys! sorry I haven't updated in FOREVER!! it's all my fault. It was a busy last week of school and I finally have a short break for a breath. Next week i'm going to be at a camp and away from wifi for a whole seven days! </3 hopefully you wont miss me THAT much. I love you guys
this chapter was written my Rae.Barakitten

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Comments

@Rae.Barakitten
:P
@Heather
Awh shucks.
Rae.Barakitten Rae.Barakitten
7/31/13
@Rae.Barakitten
lol dat is cuz u IS special! c:
@Heather
You make me feel special :3
Rae.Barakitten Rae.Barakitten
7/31/13
@Rae.Barakitten
:D your an amazing writer I could never pull off a story like this! :P