Welcome To My Life

I had been walking around for what felt like hours. I had soon reached the woods and while pretty much anyone would refuse to enter the woods at night, I didn't. I loved how peaceful and quiet woods were, it calmed me down. Back at home, if I could still call it that, I used to spend so much time in the woods. I went there whenever I was upset and just walked around for hours. The difference was, I knew my way around there. In these woods however, I had no clue where I was. I didn't really care in the state was in, though. I just kept walking. I had to get away from it all. From Jack, Alex, Jenna... Of course I didn't belong here. Of course I didn't fit in here. I never fit in at home, what on earth made me think I would fit in here? I was such an idiot.

By now my feet were killing me, so I stopped to take off my high heels. I sighed. Why did I let it get this far? I felt like such a mess. I kicked off my shoes, and bend over to pick them up when I changed my mind. Why even bother, I was never gonna wear them again anyway. Heels were definitely not my thing and I will never understand why any girl puts herself through the torture of wearing them, just to look feminine.

I continued walking, leaving my shoes where I left them. A shiver ran down my spine. It got a lot colder ever since I ran away from who were supposed to be my friends. I was definitely not dressed for a cold night in the woods, but as I didn't have anywhere else to go, I didn't exactly have a choice. I kept on walking until I noticed lights in front of me. In a few minutes I got to what seemed to be the other side of the woods, leading back to some town. I wasn't sure where I was. My eyes had to adjust to the bright lights from the street lights.

I noticed a fence on my right and quickly realized there was a meadow with horses behind it, even though I could barely figure out their silhouettes. At home, I used to have my own horse. My parents sold him though, when I was moving to Baltimore. His name was Firebolt and he had been my best and only friend for years. I tried not to think about it, but seeing these horses made me miss him. A - for as far as I could tell - brown horse came walking up to the fence and I stroked its nose. I just stood there for a while, stroking the horses head absentmindedly.

I had always been more fond of animals than people. Animals didn't judge you, based on your appearance, or on anything else that didn't matter. If you were nice to them, they'd like you. People didn't work like that. They might be nice to your face, but behind your back... Jack just proved me how right I was about that.

"Hey! What are you doing over there?" An old man suddenly appeared from behind the horse. "Get off my grounds!"

Not looking for any trouble, I quickly turned around and ran off, back into the woods. Up until now I had been able to hold back my tears but now there was no stopping the waterworks. Tears were streaming down my face. Why? Because of everything. I might be very good at keeping up appearances but I wasn't fine, not at all. I hadn't been in months and moving to Baltimore didn't make it any better. I missed my parents, my horse, my friends... My little brother...

I leaned my back against a tree and slid down until I was sat on the ground. I pulled up my legs, hugging them and resting my head on my knees. There I was, sitting in the woods in the middle of the night on my own. I knew it would get a lot colder than it already was and I had no idea where I was. Out of frustration I had thrown my phone at a three which it did of course not survive. I could try to find my way out of the forest and find food and shelter somewhere, but what's the point? Why even bother? I was so done with everything. Maybe it'd be easier to just give up...

Alex's POV
Jenna and I had been driving around Baltimore for about two hours now and still hadn't found Liz.
"Alex, maybe we should just go home..." Jenna suggested.
"No" I said shortly.
"I don't think Liz wants to be found" she sighed.
"I don't care! She has to be found!" I exclaimed, causing Jenna to be quiet.

Out of frustration, I hit both hands on the steering wheel, causing Jenna to jump.
"Sorry" I muttered.
"Look, Alex, I know how you feel but this isn't gonna get us anywhere. We have school tomorrow and..."
"You really think I care about school right now?" I groaned.
"Probably not, but you should if you want to graduate" Jenna said. "She might just be at school tomorrow and if not, I promise I'll help you search for her all weekend."

I sighed. I knew Jenna was right and I wasn't sure why I had to find Liz so bad. I mean, yes, I liked her but I also hardly knew her.
"You're right" I muttered. "Should I drop you off at home?"
"Yes please" she nodded.
I knew where she lived from when we had to do a school project together. I drove to her house and pulled over.

"It's gonna be okay" Jenna said, but I felt like she was just trying to convince herself.
"Since we are now competitors, shouldn't we be less nice to each other?" I asked her before she got out.
She furrowed her eyebrows. "What?"
"You know, for Liz' heart" I shrugged.
"Well, I highly doubt I'll be any competition as I'm pretty sure Liz is not gay, so why not just be friends" Jenna suggested.
"I suppose you're right" I nodded.
"I know" she replied. "See you tomorrow."
"See you" I replied as she got out of the car.

Relunctantly I drove home. I wanted to continue searching but I knew it wasn't a good idea. I'm sure Liz will be at school tomorrow. At least, that's what I kept telling myself.

Notes

Title credit: Green Day - Boulevard Of Broken Dreams