A Little Therapy

Alex was a little more than surprised when a soaking wet Jack Barakat stood in his hallway, wearing only a thin white shirt and a pair of trousers- his usual school attire, soaked through to the bone. It appeared he had forgotten a jacket in his hurry and now his clothes were clinging like a second layer of skin, whilst droplets ran from each strand of his mahogany hair down his face and back. “You’re not coming anywhere near my bedroom when you’re soaked through like that,” The born Brit crossed his arms over his chest sternly, his eyes half trailing over the white shirt clinging to the other’s lean stomach. “Take your clothes off, I’ll get you some PJ’s,” He took the wet backpack from the other with a vow to hang up the soaked contents to dry. When he looked up to see the other hadn’t moved he furrowed his eyebrows “Well? Hurry up, I haven’t got all day,”

Jack swallowed, his cheeks darkening as he stared at the ground whilst his shaky hands drifted to his top button and slid it through the hole. The chocolate eyed boy slowly moved through the other buttons, so fixated on the floor that he couldn’t see the other watching every trembling movement with a stare alike to that of a watchman in the guard tower. In the end, the ebony haired boy let the soaked shirt crumple in his hands, slightly more confident as he slide the belt through the buckle and dragged the dripping trousers down off his legs. “Where do you want me to urm…” He looked up and met the half-blackened eyes of a man completely overthrown with lust. It took him by surprise, of course it did, no one had ever looked at him with lust before, yet there was no way eyes that dark could be anything else. “Alex?” Jack whispered nervously, stood shivering in his boxers with the blackened ends of his hair pushing water down his back.

“I…yes…just give them to me,” That voice, so deep and scratchy that it barely sounded like the light hearted and clear-minded boy that he was used too, it sounded more like Kellin, itching for a hit of some form of drug. The darker-skinned boy let Alex take the soaked clothes and hang them on the banister “I…Kellin went home, for a fucking change,” He chuckled “Well I told him too, he was so far out of it, I wasn’t sure he was safe around other human beings,” He’s trying to lighten the mood, take it and run. And yet we’re both painfully aware of how… Jack shook his head and faked a smile, though it appeared more of a pained grimace.

“Maybe you should stop him smoking in here?” The quieter one said with a chuckle, following his friend up the stairs with his arms wrapped around his skinny frame. He watched as the sunset haired boy retrieved a baggy old shirt and some pyjama bottoms from his drawers, tossing them for the other to catch and pull on with a noise of thinly veiled approval, glad to be encased by some form of warmth.

“He wouldn’t listen, besides I don’t mind him smoking, it makes him happy, what I do mind is him not realising that there’s a limit before he goes too far y’know,” Alex lay back on his bed, drawing a thankfully normal cigarette to his lips and lighting it, inhaling with a gentle sigh of happiness as his head hit the pillow. Seeing the other standing awkwardly he exhaled and patted the space next to him with a welcoming smile. “Make yourself at home,” the burnt golden haired other watched as Jack lay down awkwardly, their legs intertwining just so they could fit on the single bed. “Do you smoke?”

“I…no…no I don’t,” The darker skinned one looked away bashfully, he was a nerd, sweet and innocent and he knew as such. But instead of receiving the laughter and snort of derision that Jack had been waiting for, the other simply held out the cigarette with a nod and smile, his eyes glinting with a mischief that reminded him why Alex and Kellin were friends.

“Would you like to try it?” Oh, my dear God, those eyes. He thought silently to himself, taking the cancer stick with trembling fingers, out of pure spite of his parents and upbringing, placed it between his lips and inhaled slowly. Immediately, he coughed and spluttered, sitting up and grasping his stomach. Oh fuck, oh fuck, can’t breathe. Alex chuckled and rubbed his back, taking the cigarette before it could be crushed in his hands, before he placed it back between his own lips. That’s been in my mouth, shit that was in his mouth, now it’s back in his mouth, I really need to breathe.

“Ouch,” Jack finally coughed out “What…burnt my throat…how do you…Eurgh!” He trailed off shaking his head, his now drying hair being brushed out of his face as he combed his hair out of his face. Alex laughed, gesturing for the other to watch him.

“Here, let me show you a way I learnt,” He explained “And don’t get the wrong idea, cos it involves a little lip action, but basically, inhale when I exhale ok?” The elder smiled reassuringly, bringing the cigarette to his lips and inhaling slowly, closing his eyes before moving slowly towards the other, giving him a small signal that he could pull away. But of course he didn’t, as if Jack would pull away here and now, not with this chance, so he parted his lips and inhaled when he exhaled. There was something erotically cancerous about their situation, with their lips just touching whilst one breathed in polluted air from the others lungs. It made Jack’s head spin. This time, however, when he took the breath of cancer, it didn’t feel like it was polluting his throat, didn’t feel so strong as he inhaled and then let the smoke drift away from his lips like the rest of authority he believed had control of him.

And there they were, two good friends, lips tingling from an action that was so blissfully intimate and yet still as far from romantic as possible. Their lips were hovering and the breath on each other’s faces sent shivers cascading down spines, please don’t pull away now, please just fucking kiss me. Jack thought, chastising himself for swearing, before he took the last part of living thought. Then the two of them moved closer, as if joined by one literal thought and their lips smashed together, and this time it was romantic, it was passionate and by God it was everything he thought it would be.

Alex pulled away first, though it was with a hiss as the burnt end of a cigarette scalded his fingertips. The more experienced of the two was the one panting and gasping for air, his pupils wide from something that hadn’t even involved the parting of lips; like it was something he’d wanted a hit for for so long, and now he’d gotten just a taste he was sky high. “I…” But he didn’t say anymore, just trailed off and crushed the cigarette out the window, shaking his head. “We should…sleep…Kellin’s coming around tomorrow,”

Jack nodded, and didn’t question it, lying down with his back facing the other boy who made his heart hammer in his chest so very loudly. Instead he watched the wall with intent, as darkness filled the room and his mind, alone as always. The younger wrapped his arms around himself and allowed his mind to think those dangerous things that once upon a time he would only think at night. But then he met Alex and Kellin, then he got opinions-nasty things really that got him into so much trouble. His mind was running off a deep end when he felt another pair of arms wrap around his waist.

The first instinct was for the russet eyed boy to stiffen and edge away from the hold, but he didn’t, of course he didn’t. Instead he relaxed and held the hands joined at the front of his stomach, edged back into the body pressed against his back and stopped thinking. He just enjoyed.

Notes