Sing It Out

Jack's POV:
"Jack, can I talk to you?," Matt asks me. I look back at the door and back at Matt, "um. Sure." I drop my backpack on the floor and walk over to Matt. "Why are you here Jack?" "Excuse me?" "Why are you here. I can tell you have passion in you, but your not showing it. So why are you here?" I shrug and look down. "Jack, what happened to the kid in the DVD." "What?," I look at Matt confused. "The kid in the DVD." "I never sent a DVD, I only sent a CD." "Well someone sent a DVD, here take a seat." I sit down by his desk and he opens his laptop, putting in a DVD labeled 'Jack Barakat'. "It arrived late, but this is the main reason why you are here. Your CD was good, but it wasn't good enough." "Oh..." The DVD starts playing and May appears, sitting in her desk chair. She smiles brightly at the camera, "hi everyone. I'm May Barakat, Jack Barakat's sister. My brother Jack is really talented, he's a hard worker, and has the passion that you are looking for. But Jack can't reach his dreams alone, he needs help, and I think you all are the people to help him."

It cuts to me singing at open mic night while playing my guitar, to me singing in choir, me singing for fun in front of the mirror with a hair brush as a mic. It kept showing me singing and playing, and May joining me sometimes. "I hope you accept Jack, because he will not you down." The video stops, my eyes tearing up and I quickly get out of the chair. "Jack?" "I'm sorry, I have to go," I choke out. I quickly grab my back pack and run out. I run down the hall and run into someone. "Jack?," I hear Alex. I keep running and I hear him call after me. I finally reach my room and run over to my trash can. I dig through it and find one razor, the voice in my head screaming at me. I put the cool blade on my skin and press it down hard enough to break through my skin. I bite my lower lip and glide the razor a bit. "Jack!" I feel Alex's arms warp around me from behind and he grabs my hand and arm.

"Jack let go," he whispers in my ear. I shake my head and try to push him off. "Jack I'm not going to let go, your going to hurt yourself more if you fight me with a razor in your skin." "I don't care, I promised May. I promised May I would feel the same pain she felt," I sob. I freeze up and drop the razor. Realizing what I just said out loud to Alex. I stare at the blood droplets dripping off my skin onto the floor. Alex grabs the razor and turns me around to face him. "Who's May, Jack?," Alex whispers and stares at me in concern. "I can't tell you." "Jack, you just told me who your cutting for. Please tell me." I position myself to sit on the floor and Alex sits in front of me. "May is my older sister," I say with my eyes closed. "One night, I begged May to sneak out for a concert. I had gotten her tickets for Blink for her graduation present. May had gotten grounded earlier that day by my dad. During the concert, we were in the mosh pit and this guy grabs May. I tried to get him off her but he made sure I got knocked out before I had a chance to stop him. When I woke up I was in a ambulance, and the police told me that the guy had stabbed May."

I start crying more and Alex holds me. "Ever since then, I been cutting. Its the only thing that gets rid of the voice in my head. Yelling at me how I'm still living and having fun while May is dead. That is my fault. I was the one who begged her to go. She would still be alive if I haven't done that." "Jack its not your fault." "Yes it is. Its all my fault." "No its not Jack," Alex grabs my face and has me look at him. "Its your fault Jack, you tried your best to protect May. May might have been proud that you tried your hardest to protect her." "But I failed Alex. I failed at protecting my sister." "She knows that. She saw you." "I could of done more." "She knows you did your best." "How do you know that?" "If your sister really loved you, she would have done the same for you." "I should be dead not her..." "Don't say that Jack." "I just keep thinking it..."
_____________________________________________________________________________
"Are you sure Jack?" I nod, "tell Matt for me." Alex walks into Matt's classroom and I press my ear to the door to listen. "Hey Alex, what's up?" "I need to tel you something, Jack asked me to do it for him." "What is it?" "Before Jack came here, his older sister was killed." I close my eyes and bite my lower lip. "Ever since then, Jack has been torn up and it seems that what is blocking his passion." "Oh. I see." "Yeah." "How do you know about this?" "Jack told me. I been the only one who's known." "Well I'm glad to see that Jack has put his trust in you, maybe he's making progress." "Maybe, but Jack felt you had to know since you talked to him the other day." "Tell Jack I won't push him anymore, if he needs extra help, I'm available during my office hours." "Okay, I will." I step away from the door and Alex walks out. "Thanks..." Alex pats my shoulder and pulls out the razor from his pocket. "Promise me you'll never use one of these again." I stare at it, the lighting bouncing off of it. "I don't know if I can." "You have to promise me Jack." "I-I promise."

Notes