Stephanie and I have been back home for about three days. As promised, Dennis brought them over to stay with me. We had to wash all the clothes they took to West Virginia because they didn't have anything else here. We spent most of our days in my bedroom with the door closed, Kristen taking full advantage of my couch and video games while Steph and I hung out on the top bunk, quietly discussing everything Dennis had said. I believed him, because Dennis had never lied to me before, but Steph was hesitant. She admitted that it's very likely that Alex and Kelly had screwed around while I was gone, but she didn't think Jack ever would. I felt bad for her, being in denial, but I enjoyed the fact that she found hope in a bad situation. Either way, Alex was a deadman and Kelly was going down with him.


Dennis had come in her earlier today to tell us that he was taking us back so that I could get my stuff before everything was shoved into boxes to be moved out. I agreed to go for the simple fact that I had a score to settle. I would love Kelly for the rest of my life, indeed, but once you cross me, you better cross your heart.


So, as the day was dragging on, the three of us decided it was time to come out of my now messy room and get this show on the road. When we got to the kitchen, however, we realized why Dennis was in no rush to leave. In the middle of the kitchen, he had his tongue down my mother's throat. I inwardly gagged and shot a worried look to Steph. This would not end well, but then again, nothing for us ever does.


"Daddy!" Kristen shrieked, tugging on his shirt. "What about momma?!"


"Don't worry about it, Kris," he pulled away from my mom and began walking towards the door, Kris harrassing him the whole way. My mom wiped her lips off and went to the fridge to grab a beer. Shaking my head, I trailed behind Steph to the door. "Come on, girls, let's get this over with."


The ride to what we used to consider 'home' was mostly quiet, other than Dennis telling me to keep my cool. I honestly think I scared him when we were in West Virginia, the way I let my scream be my minor break down. He had to shove me back in the car and drive around with me before he'd take me back, which meant he had to buy me a case of beer and let me punch anything in sight.


When we arrived at the house, he instantly told Kristen to go down the road to a friends house. She fought him on the matter until he walked her there, leaving me and Steph alone. We stared at the house for a long time, our heads swarming with thoughts we couldn't speak. I lit a cigarette and watched the smoke dance in the wind, fury in my gut. Stephanie had less to worry about, her innocense would serve as protection in this matter, but I had nothing left to loose. For me, this was a hit or miss kind of thing. So, being me, I flicked the cigarette across the yard and began my storm of rage to the house, and just as I was about to climb those familiar steps, a firm hand grabbed my arm and yanked me away from them.


"What gives?"


"Me first," Dennis grumbled, shoving a cigarette in my hand to keep me content. "Wait here."


I bit the inside of my lip to avoid getting short with Dennis and let the rush of anger pass. When I calmed down enough to shove the stick in my mouth and light it, I dragged Rae over to the bedroom window, which was barely cracked. Taking a drag from the cigarette, I passed it to Rae and stood on my tip-toes to hear better. Hushed whispering that I couldn't make out.


"Why did Daddy have a cigarette?" Stephanie asked, taking a hit. "He doesn't even smoke."


"He knew he'd need something to calm me down," I snorted. "Don't get too close to the window, Steph, he'll see you with it."


Her bug eyes nearly popped out of her head as she released the smoke from her lungs and quickly passed it back to me. I playfully rolled my eyes and took a long drag, a smile forming on my lips when the voices grew louder. I could hear stomping around the room, making my curiousity grow. There were a few bangs around the room and then Kell's voice started to boom through the window. She was telling Dennis to fuck off, that it wasn't any of his business. He proceeded to call her a whore, a worthless mother and a lazy, mooching slob. I supressed my giggle with another hit off of the cigarette.


"What was that," Rae grabbed my arm just as I dropped the butt, stomping it out with my shoe. "Jessie, that doesn't sound good."


She was right - It didn't sound good. To be perfectly honest, it sounded like Dennis punched the living shit out of Kelly, which I probably wouldn't have minded... But when another loud crash came from the house and Dennis screamed 'fuck' to the top of his lungs, Stephanie's eyes filled with tears. I cursed her under my breath and ran a hand over my face. I didn't want to rush to anyone's side in attept to save them, I wanted to watch the blood splatter. However, Steph's mental health meant more to me than that, so I carried myself up those steps with her trailing close behind and welcomed myself into the house I knew I'd grow to miss with time. Just a single glance made memories rush back into my heart. Why does everything good get ruined?


"Let her go, Dennis," I breathed, barely meaning the words. "Go outside and take a breather."


"Jess?" Kelly's eyes seemed to flash with regret, which made my stomach flop. "Jess, listen, I-"
"You can shut the fuck up, bitch," I cut her off, holding my hand up with a hurt smile. "Dennis, I can take it from here. Go."


Dennis looked like he was going to protest, but when Steph let out a sob, he let go of Kelly's arms and stomped through the house, leaving the three of us alone. Stephanie wiped her eyes and grabbed an empty box off of the couch and started filling it with her things, which were strewn all over the living room. I probably should have helped her right then, but I had a score to settle.


"You haven't given me a chance to explain. It's not how Dennis says it is!"


"So what is it this time, Kelly?" I shoved my hand into my pocket and ripped my cigarette pack by tugging on it so hard. My hands were shaking as I shoved another stick in my mouth, wishing it were a pill, and watched the cherry come to life. "Did you just get too drunk and take your clothes off?"


"Oh my God -- Is that --" I held in the smoke as Steph picked up a clothes hanger and bent down in front of her bedroom door. I nearly gagged as I choked on the smoke, watching her lift up a used condom. Freshly used, I'd say, by the fact that it was still limp. "Fucking gross!"


Her fingers dropped the hanger and it bounced on the floor, making some of the contents in the condom spill out. I shook my head in disgust and turned my attention back to Kelly, a cruel grin on my lips.


"Was that an accident too, Kells?"


"You know what, Jessie? I don't have to sit here and listen to this. You're a child, you have no idea what I'm going through!"


"Fuck you, Kelly," I spat, marching forward through the mess. She took a step back as I neared her. "Let me tell you something slut, everything shitty that's happened to you over the last few weeks were given to you on a silver platter for a reason. You'd rather be stoned out of your mind than take care of the kids you assumed responsibility for. You'd rather get drunk with us kids than spend time with your boyfriend. What happened to me, though? That was fucking uncalled for. So tell me, right the fuck now, do something that might actually make you feel like less of a waste of air and tell me - Did you fuck him?"


"It's not like I just slept with him, Jessica!" I cringed as she used my full name. My hand slid over the counter in the kitchen to grip an empty beer bottle, dropping what was left of my cigarette in the glass. "I have feelings for him and he has feelings for me! All those nights that you were wallowing in self-pity made him realize that you two weren't meant to be!"


My palm gripped the bottle so tight that my knuckles were turning white. Behind me, I heard Steph kick some things around to get to me, but honestly if she had touched me, I would have decked her. And she knew that. Tilting my head to the side, I could feel my vision going black. I was going to rip her apart, slowly.


"That's fine," I breathed, more calmly than expected. "But if you feel so deeply for Alex, why'd you fuck Jack, Kelly?"


Her face went white. Steph let out a gasp behind me, I knew she'd start crying at any given minute. Kelly shook her head and went to turn away from me, which just pissed me off more. With a grunt, I chuckled the bottle at her head and she only dodged it because Stephanie let out a scream. The glass cracked against the wall and shattered to the floor. Now even more angry that I'd missed her head, I charged at her full-force. My fist was just about to collide with her face when a pair of arms locked around my body and dragged me from the room.


"Let me go, Dennis! I'm going to fucking kill her!"


"She's not worth it, Jessie!"


"Yes, she is! She ruined everything! Would you both just fucking look at her?! She fucked your daughter's boyfriend while she was at her grandpa's funeral, that's just sick! She's fucking sick!"


"Let it go, Jessie," Dennis released me, but kept his hands firmly on my shoulders. "Let's just go. I'll bring your stuff to you another time."


"Fuck that," I growled, ripping my arms out of his grasp to grab a box. I started shoving the random things on the floor that belonged to me into the cardboard, making sure anything that was Kelly's got crushed under something heavier. "Oh look, Kells. A picture of us from the second time I came to your old place!"


Her eyes were leaking heavily, sobs drifting through the room. I smiled brightly at her as I ripped the photo to shreads, tossing it in her direction.


"You'll pay for this, Kelly. One day you'll lose it all and you'll have no one to blame but yourself."


Her lips quivered as she tried to find the words to speak, but I grabbed my last shirt and shoved it in the box, storming through the living room and out of the door. Once I made it to the car, I shoved the box in the backseat and had to fight my desire to both vomit and cry. How could two people I loved and trusted so much stab me in the back like that? I've been going through a hard time for an awfully long time, but I'd never do something like that to any of them.


In an attempt to calm myself down, I ran to the edge of the driveway and threw myself into the middle of the road, for the very last time. The rocks cut up my knees, but I welcomed the pain with open arms. I tried to soak in all the feelings of that moment to carry with me when I left this place, just to remind myself in the future that no one, and I mean no one, is worth this pain.


"Is that-?"


My head shot up. Before I could catch myself, I was on my feet and walking toward the voice. He stopped dead in his tracks, his face draining of color as he seemed to stutter over the air in his lungs.


"You son of a bitch!"


Jack held his arms up and slapped Alex in the back one good time, to snap him out of his daze. Alex blinked, realizing how close I was to him, before he spun on his heel and started to run away from me.


"You're a fucking coward, Alex!"


He rounded the curve just as I stopped chasing after him. What was I doing? He obviously wasn't worth it. Sucking in a sharp breath, I wiped the tear from my eye before it could run down my cheek, shaking my head at his actions.


"He does love you, Jessie," Jack whispered. "He's just confused."


"Oh really?" I lifted my head, staring at him like he was the Devil. "I guess that's why you fucked her too, then?"


Jack hung his head in shame, scratching the back of his head.


"If I could just go talk to Steph I could explain everything."


"Don't bother," I whispered. "Her heart is broken enough."


Jack tried to object, but I held my hand and nearly slapped him in the face. Taking the hint, he backed away slowly before he mocked Alex's actions entirely. Fucking pussy. Kicking rocks in the direction they ran, I cut my losses and went back to the car, sliding in the front seat as everyone started to come together. Stephanie sat in the back with tears running down her cheeks, Dennis climbed in the front and announced that we were going to go pick up Kristen, then we'd never, ever have to see this place again.


I hope it catches fire.. And I hope she's inside when it does.

Notes

I feel too clustered to call each of you out, so let me just say this: I LOVE YOU! YES, YOU!
Also, keep those boots on. <3.
Oh, and this is a bad day for me, so if I'm grumpy.. I apologize. You'll understand later. <3.