The Blink Show

Jack's p.o.v

"Jack?" I heard my name being called quietly, but I knew it was only in my dream.

"Jack!" I was shot awake by my name being shouted and my eyes squinted as a massive headache came buzzy through my head. It was cold and I was freezing.

Where the hell am I?

My squinted eyes managed to form a tall person beside me, his arms were crossed.

"Jack, what the hell are you doing out here?!" The person shouted again, making me groan as it sent a wave of pain through my head. Will they stop shouting?!

I shrugged, and opened my eyes fully.

In front of me was Mark Hoppus, and my location was outside the tour bus, slumped against the wheel. I guess I slept out here? But why?

"Well we better get you in, you're almost blue. Did you not know it had been raining last night? Maybe we might have to take you to the doctors in case you caught something from being asleep through it." He said, pulling his arm out for me to take his hand. I went to grab it, but my body was weak and only then did I realise I was soaked in rain water.

I sighed, and so did Mark as he came over and picked me up. Damn, he was strong. He managed to get the bus door open again and walked up the few stairs before placing me down on the couch. I realised the bus was quiet, but I knew people were in it. Probably at the back lounge.

"Hang on, I'll go and get Alex." Mark informed, walking away and leaving me on the couch. For some reason, the mention of Alex's name made my heart leap, and I don't think it was a good thing, either.

Moments later, Mark returned, a towel in his hand and confusion printed all over his face with no Alex in sight.

He passed me to towel and I quickly tried drying myself up.

"I don't know what has been going on between you and Alex, but he seems to be pissed off with you." Mark said, looking at me strangely. What happened? What did I do? We were fine yesterday. It must've been from last night when-

I kissed his dad.

Oh god, now I fucking remember. It was so wrong. Sure, I've had a little crush on Tom for years, but I didn't want to kiss him, despite my dreams of exactly that. He is twenty-four years older than me, it's not right.

I had Alex now, and he is my only one. But after what I did, I'm sure he is going to kick my ass and tell me to leave. But I was drunk, I honestly didn't mean to. What is Tom going to say? Oh god, I really fucked up.

"I, um. I know why. I guess I better go and talk to him." I mumbled to the tall, blue-eyed man in front of me, giving him a fake smile I'm sure he could see through.

I got up with a bit of struggle as my body was still a bit weak and wobbly.

I mentally prepared myself for shouting and anger. I also prepared myself for what I was going to say, how I was going to explain myself not only to my boyfriend, but my idol, my hero.

As I reached Alex's bunk room door, I took a deep breath. I knocked gently, wanting things to go calmly, even though I knew it wouldn't.

"What?!" A hoarse, annoyed, harsh voice came from the other side of the door. Wow, he was pissed. I know that he's also upset, and I feel like such a dick.

"It's me. Um, can I come in, please?" I asked softly, taking in a deep breath. I didn't want him to shout at me, even though I deserved it.

I got no reply, so I let out a sigh, slowly opening the door. As soon as I got in the room, I saw Alex on his bed, laying on his belly with his head in his soft pillows.

"Alex...I'm really sorry. I didn't know what I was do-" I started, but got cut off by Alex.

"I know." He said, his voice getting muffled by the pillow.

"I'm just really sorry. I don't want you to be angry and upset over my stupid mistake, even though you have every right to do so." I said, truthfully. I didn't want Alex to be upset. I just hope he doesn't cut things off between us because I like him so much. I was beginning to fall in love with him.

He makes my heart leap like no one else can. He makes me so happy, I want to cry. He gives me everything and only expects love as a gift back from me. He makes me feel more comfortable in situations I would find extremely awkward in if he wasn't there. All this in only a month. It's amazing.

I wish I could tell him all this, because he deserves to know. One day I will, but first I have other things to sort out.

"I'm not upset or angry, just a little disappointed." He sighed, lifting his head up from the soft pillows to look at me. His eyes were a little red and his face seemed to be drained out of colour. I could tell he is (has) been upset and angry because of me and my stupid mistake. That's all it was; a stupid mistake.

"Okay, I understand. But, I only like you and I don't want to lose you, Alex. I don't want to lose you because of a stupid mistake."

"You won't lose me. I understand it was a mistake. Can we just forget about it?" He sounded fed up. I slowly nodded.

"Okay, but I've got to find your dad to apologise tom him, too. God dammit, I really did fuck up. No more drinking for me." I chuckled quietly, trying to warm up the situation. Alex mumbled something to himself before placing his head back onto the pillow. I let out the hundredth sigh this day and walked out, on the search for my idol, my hero.

But some fresh clothes before that.

Notes

What even is this chapter?

I'v been so uninspired and unmotivated for the past, I don't know, two months? And my chapters are getting really shitter. I've also been lazy.

I feel like none of you really like this story any more, and I'm not saying that for the attention. I just honestly don't feel like my writing is as good as it used to somewhat be. Even though you guys tell me this is your favourite story and you love it, I just feel like it's not good enough.

I think it's the fact that the more seriously you take your writing, the more harder it is to write. For me, anyway.

And the fact that this story hasn't really got a plot is making it so much harder. But since I'm not inspired, I have no ideas.

Don't worry, I'm not giving up on this story as I'm really proud (well, was proud) of it and the fact it's also got so popular c: It's just that you might be getting shitty updates with terrible chapters.

I feel really bad for you guys because all I do is say sorry for late updates and shitty chapters. Like I don't want to have to keep saying that when I update.

You lot are really awesome and sometimes give me that motivation with your comments. But there has been lesser comments and I think that's because of how boring and stupid the chapters and updates this story (and my other stories) have been getting. I'm not saying it's your fault, because I love you all.

I really need to start getting my shit together and stop being lazy. I don't know, maybe look for my inspiration, because it's bond to be somewhere. Maybe I should go out more instead of being a potato.

I think this author's note is longer than the chapter itself xD.

Anyway, now I got that rant of feelings is out the way, I think it's time to shut up.

Oh, and did I tell you school is also taking up my time? Yeah, fuck that place.

Thanks for reading, beautifuls. Thanks for reading this author"s note if you did, I guess :')

Bye, love you all.