Having a lover older than you can be appealing for many reasons.

I held his hands, as I start to push in, littering his body with wet and soft kisses, on his jaw, cheeks and collarbones. He groaned in response with my action, I let myself wait in time for him to adjust. I know we've done this for a few times, but I also know how much it hurts.

He put his legs were on my shoulders, as he gave me a small nod to move. And I did, it was a slow pace, building a rhythm for the both of us. He was clutching the bed sheets; his anticipation to grasp the sweet release is growing stronger. "Oh, Jack." he moaned, I snaked my hands on the small of his back whilst I created fast and rough thrusts. He let his legs fall on my sides as I pulled him to a sitting position, still thrusting hard and fast inside him.

"I... I can't.." he panted, eyes closed and cheeks flushed. His breathing were uneven and his voice getting higher and higher with my every push. "Me too.. together now.."

Three more thrusts and I was out, so was he. Our climaxes consist of both our names rolling off of each other's tongues. As he fell down the mattress, and I fell down on top of him. Collecting ourselves and steadying our breaths.

I took a loving look at him, his eyes were still closed, mouth agape and his cheeks were a touch of rose. I leant down gently and connected our lips in a short kiss, as I pulled out of him.

"Sorry.. i.. I came inside you." I said, feeling the heat rising up my cheeks.

"It's okay. It feels good." he said, as he moaned once again, feeling the sticky slick cum drip from his hole to the bed sheets. He looked so flustered and.... fucked. And sexy. With a mere sight of him I was already hard again.

"Ugh. You look so sexy you make me want to do it again! Goddammit!" I said in an annoyed manner, nuzzling my face to the crook of his neck, inhaling the sweet scent of him.

"You're staying here tonight," he said, his breathing still faltering from the events that occurred, "You skipped work just to come here, didn't you?"

"What am I gonna do? Matt's coming over tomorrow anyway to help me. And my deadline's on the next day." I told him. Curling his hair on my finger tips.

"D'you want me to help? I have a lot more free time than you," he said as he put his hand on my neck and pushed himself up, his face was inches closer to mine. "Sorry for always distracting you."

He kissed my nose, standing up at the foot of the bed facing me, my eyes followed him and it soon landed on the cum dripping down to his thighs. I could already feel myself getting hard at the sight.

"I.. it's alright." I stammered.

"I do feel responsible for always bothering you." he said, smirking at me and raising his eyebrows. "Take a shower with me?"

I'm Jack Barakat, 22 years old, a budding novelist. And as you can already tell, right now, I'm captivated by my lover.

We met a month ago;

"Ah! Thank goodness! You made it on time, Jack. It does all good, just don’t make me worry like that next time, okay?" Rian said as I handed him my latest book that was due just about now. I smiled at him and rubbed the back of my neck, it felt awkward to be in this situation. I wasn't much of a fan of Rian, well, maybe because he's my boss.

"I-i'm sorry... I'll do better next time. I promise." I stammered, looking at the ground with pure interest.

"Nah, it's okay. I'd treat you for some coffee but I had to hand this to the publisher immediately. Just order something under my name, alright?" Rian said, as he started to walk inside the elevator.

"No, it's fine. I'll be staying up the 10th floor for my photographs."

"Alright, suit yourself. See ya later, Jack!" he yelled just as the doors were shutting.

-

I was at the 10th floor of the building, where usually no one would go to and the view from here is just breathtaking. I could see almost the whole city of Maryland. I was about to take my last photo when an unfamiliar voice startled and caused me to drop my camera.

"Aren't you Jack Barakat, the novelist? I've seen your photographs somewhere too." the man said, he was a lot shorter than I am. And his hair was blonde, his eyes were dreamy and it was brown. I could practically feel my insides churn and melt at the sight of him. And I'm sure my cheeks are on fire right now. "I read your books. I'm a fan." he continued, brushing his fringe and turning to the scenery in front of us, "This view is beautiful for taking pictures, you picked the right spot."

He was irresistible when he asked me out for lunch. And I simply can't refuse his charms.

"Oh my god! You're Alex Gaskarth?! The Alex Gaskarth?!" I yelled, he was Alex Gaskarth, the writer of the most famous erotic novels in the whole U.S. He's made millions of dollars with his works. He just smiled cutely at me, "We're in the same business! Why didn't you mention it earlier?" I continued, he just shrugged at me and continued to eat at his fries.

"I always thought you were a girl. Is that your real name?" I asked, poking the olives on my salad with my fork.

"People always think 'Alex' is a girl's name, I got used to it. But my real name's Alexander William Gaskarth." he said.

You see, as I've already said, Alex was a novelist just like me, but he's not just a novelist. He mainly writes adult series. Thanks to his sensitive touches and erotic plot development, he has so many hardcore fans.

"I've always been inspired by your work. But, wait... how old are you anyway?" I said. Cocking my head to the side and raising an eyebrow in confusion.

"Well, how old do I look?"

"I'm guessing.... 20?" I guessed, and he just laughed. Maybe he was quite younger than that?

"Actually, I'm 32."

I almost choked on my own drink, 32?! He looks fucking fifteen! Oh my god.

"What?! You don't look like it at all!" I said, surprised. And he just leaned on in his arms on the table and smiled at me, he does that a lot. I really find it so cute. Damn it.

"Do you have time? If it's okay, we can go for a few round of drinks at the club downtown?" he asked at me, wearing his puppy dog eyes and a small pout.

"I.. i guess, sure."

-

"Hey bro, another round of JD's for me and my friend here." Alex said to the bartender who just nodded at the request. We've been downing shots after shots of JD's for 4 hours now, and I really couldn't handle my alcohol anymore.

"Ugh. Alex, I don't think I can down one more shot of that. My tolerance is so low, you don't even know." I slurred at Alex, who just laughed at my intoxicated state. Stupid smile like that, why does he need to be perfect?!

"Fine! Fine, we're going home. Just down this shot one more time then we'll go."

-

"Alex.. uhh." I slurred, my visions were becoming blurry with each step I took. My arms were slung on Alex's shoulders as we enter, in what I assume, his apartment. "Alex.. my head hurts."

"Do you need to puke? I'll take you to the bathroom," he said as he pulled me to the direction of the said room, but I didn't want to puke, I wanted to sleep and cuddle with him so I pulled his shirt to make him stop but I guess I pulled a little hard as the next thing I know, I fell down on the floor on my back and Alex was on top of me.

"Jack?" he whispered, staring at me with lustful eyes, licking his lips in anticipation. He snaked his hands around my neck and nuzzled his face on the crook of it as he pulled me tighter to him. Am I no good? Does he only like girls?

I pushed him off of me as he landed beside me with a faint thud; I quickly straddled his thin frame. I started to lean forward, hot breath ghosting over each other. I closed my eyes, still hesitant about kissing him but the next thing I knew were soft sweet lips connecting to mine. It was slow and innocent, quick pecks. But I started to lick his bottom lip, asking for entrance which he granted the access immediately and soon enough our tongues were battling for dominance, but of course, we both knew I would win.

A couple of wet and rough kisses passed, we were on the bed now and soon enough we were both naked, grinding to each other. Alcohol was getting the best of us and we both don't even know what's going on now, all we know is we're both having the time of our live. And for a man, Alex was quite beautiful. So I couldn't stop myself from moaning when he leaned down and started to lick a stripe up my shaft, his tongue was so wet and warm I couldn't hold the loud moan that escaped from my throat when he engulfed mu whole cock, practically deep throating me.

"Alex, please.." I said, pleading and wanting anything.

"Please what, Jack?" he asked innocently after he pulled out of my hard on with an obscene 'pop'. There were traces of saliva on his chin and his lips were shiny and just so wet.

"Please, I... I need y-you." I said, tilting my head back and closing my eyes when the tip of his tongue brushed on my slit a few more times.

He lied down on his back, and took two fingers in his mouth as he started to jerk himself off, those slick and slippery fingers found its way to his hole, he started to finger himself open, one digit soon became two and he was moaning right now like he was paid to do it.

"C'mon Jack, d-don't you want m.. me?" he said, panting and his eyes were lidded in pure pleasure, moaning when he hit that sweet spot inside him.

My dick was still wet from his blowjob, I removed his fingers from his hole, earning a whine of protest but he didn't even have the chance to finish it when I pushed in all the way inside until I bottomed out.

"Uhh, Jack, move!" he yelled and hit my arms. I started to thrust in and out of him. A steady rhythm, a circling motion and soon I was hitting his prostate dead on accuracy. Alex couldn't even form coherent words anymore, but with a lot of self control, he made me stop as he turned around so he was on his hands and knees. God, he was so hot like this. I don't think I've ever seen any woman or man as hot as Alex Gaskarth.

"Jack, hurry!" I snapped out of my trance and started to push inside Alex again, this time going rough and fast, I slapped his round ass and held on to his hips, pushing in and pit roughly, "Jack.. Jack please, I-.. I can't anymore." he moaned his pitch going higher and higher.

His knees and arms gave out and he landed on the mattress on his stomach, while I still thrust inside him in a fast pace, I don't think I can go on any faster than this. Sweat slicked skin slapping on each other were the only things heard inside the quiet room, along with our moans and groans.

The noises became louder and his voice were getting higher and higher it was arousing to hear.

"J-jack.. Jack, I'm coming!" and right after he said that, he immediately came, staining the bed sheets beneath us, and the clenching of his tight hole were too much, pushing me over the edge.

We composed ourselves and our breaths were still uneven, I closed my eyes, alcohol still evident in my body. I fell asleep almost instantly when I felt Alex snuggle himself beside me, his arms around my waist, falling asleep.

-

I shot up from my sleep, the flashbacks of the events that happened last night all coming back to me all at once. I slept with someone I don't even know. And he was a guy on top of that?! What the hell am I going to do!!

"Morning. Want some coffee?" I heard a familiar voice came from the kitchen. It was obvious whose it is.

I turned to look and he just smiled at me cutely, walking towards the kitchen again.

Now, am I really gonna do this? He was nice and beautiful and a very good fuck to top it all off. He was sweet and gentle, and for fuck's sake! He's a famous novelist. Alright, I'll do it.

"Uh... Alex?"

"Hmm?"

"Pleasegooutwithme!" I blurted out too fast, I couldn't even understand. He cocked his head in confusion and worry; he held my shaking hands and said, "Calm down, Jack. Say it again, slower this time."

"Okay, I was.. uhm. I was gonna s-say.. I'd l-like you to go o-out with me. P-please?" I stammered. I looked him straight in the eyes, nervous that his face wasn't giving away any emotion at all.

"Oh God, I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that. I'm just leaving, I'm sorry Alex." I said but as I was pulling my hands off of his', he held it tighter and smiled at me, "Okay! I'm single now, anyway." he said.

"R-really?" I muttered, I still can't believe that I'm going out with him.

"Mhmm. But, uhm. Jack? Why don't you put on some pants first?" He said, and I looked down, feeling my cheeks flush when I saw that I'm so exposed to him, and I just asked him to go out with me. Good job, Jack, you twat. I quickly covered my exposed dick with my hands, feeling no escape to Alex's eyes.

"Or maybe... you wanna go for some rounds again?" he said as he leaned in closer to me, kissing my lips. His hands cupping my dick. Oh, man. I think I'm gonna enjoy this.

-

Oh, Alex. I can't stop imagining his hands trailing up and down my body, the way his back would arch whenever I hit his spot. Or the way his body would shudder every time I lick his earlobe and a stripe up his neck. His perfect plum of a lips and his perfectly shaped round ass. Oh I think I could do that all day without stopping.

"Jack.."

His hips, oh man his hips, my fingers fit perfectly at the bruises there, proof that everything we've done was true, that I wasn't day dreaming.

"...I said Jack!"

I snapped of my dirty thoughts of Alex and felt myself getting hard with it. Damn it, I can't hide this. "O-oh?" I said.

"These pages are done," he said, holding up the pages he volunteered he would do for me.

"Thank you. Matt's gonna be here any minute and he's gonna help me finish everything up."

"Oh? Then I should get going then. I don't wanna get in your way," he said, putting on his beanie and walked towards the door. I stood up and hugged him from behind. Slowly slipping my hands inside his shirt, my fingers gently grazing his nipples.

"Y-you can't do this, Jack. You have so many works to do." he muttered, turning around to face me, "But I'm already..." I said, too embarrassed to finish my sentence. He rose and eyebrow at me, urging me to go on. Sighing, I said, "I'm already hard." I whined, hiding my face on his shoulders in embarrassment.

"Oh, then I guess it can't be helped," He said as he started to push me towards the chair, urging me to sit.

"Stay, okay?" he said. And I nodded, as he kneeled down in front of me and started to unzip my pants. "A-alex, what are you doing?!" I asked,

"Getting rid of your problem, silly." he said and before I know it, my whole dick was inside his mouth. His head started bobbing up and down my length. His tongue feels so warm I feel like I'm going to melt.

"A-alex, Alex pull off! I'm gonna.." I didn't even my words as I came inside his mouth, Alex pulled off midway of my release, and some of it went on Alex's cheeks.

"Oh my god! Oh my god, I'm so sorry! Fuck.. I'm sorry. I'll go get tissue," I panicked and reached my hand to the desk drawers where my tissues were.

"Here," I said, wiping his face with the tissue that I had. "You're so kind, Jack." he said, smiling sweetly at me.

"W-what?! It's perfectly normal to wipe it off!" I exclaimed, looking at him unbelievably.

"I should be going now, are you... gonna be okay?" he said as he stood up and headed to the door.

"Yeah, I will. T-thanks."

-

"Matt! Thank fuck! I needed to finish my novel, it's due tomorrow!" I yelled as Matt stepped inside my flat.

"Yeah, yeah. You owe me, alright?" he laughed, looking around the room, he spotted something on my desk, "Whoa, I didn't know you read Alex Gaskarth's novels?" he asked.

"Y-yeah." I said, confused. I didn't know Alex gave me his latest novel.

"Yeah," he scoffed, flipping through the pages, "this person's really erotic. You'd never think a woman would actually write this."

People actually thought he was a woman, how wrong were they?

"I've heard rumors from other writers," he continued to talk, I cocked my head at him, interested at what he was about to say, " This woman, Alex Gaskarth, she's really loose." he said, laughing at some pages and paragraphs he skimmed at.

"They say she's a slut that'll do it with anyone who asks, like a public bathroom. It seems to be a common knowledge between writers and artists." he said, and I couldn't believe what I was hearing, was this even true?

"I wonder what she looks like. Maybe she's really ugly, despite all of the things she writes..."

"Stop saying that!" I demanded, hitting my clenched fist on the wooden desk, "What the hell's wrong with you, man?" Matt asked.

-

It started raining by the time I got to Alex's apartment, the small drops of water landing on my face; I had to hear it from him. I have to know the truth about Alex Gaskarth.

I arrived at his flat, using his spare key that he gave to me; I opened the door, flinging it open. Alex looked at me, surprised, but his face softened when he realized it was just me.

"You're done early? How was it? Oh hold on, let me make you some coffee, I.." he said, standing up and walked towards the kitchen but I stopped him on his tracks, gripping his wrist and turning him around to face me.

My head was building up in anger that I can't control, it's slowly taking over my body.

"J-jack.. you're hurting me.." he whimpered, but my grip became tighter when I heard his angelic voice.

"Is it true?" I asked through gritted teeth.

"What, Jack? I-i don't understand, please, it hurts." he asked, eyes welling with tears, it was evident in his voice that he was about to cry. But I couldn't loosen my grip; I had to know the truth about him.

"Is it true that you're the town's slut?" I asked through gritted teeth, my strong grip becoming tighter and tighter every second I think of his inevitable 'yes'.

I couldn't look him in the eyes, but I know that his eyes are wet with tears that were threatening to spill, his gaze fell down, "It's..." he trailed off.

"It's what, Alex?!" I yelled, throwing my vice grip forward, sending him stumbling on the floor in front of me. "What," I leaned forward grabbing his wrist again, "Is," I tightened my grip on him, making him howl in pain, but I couldn't feel any remorse, I couldn't feel pity, "It?!" I yelled.

Tears were streaming down his cheeks, making me snap out of my anger, loosening my fist in him. He whispered, "It's true."

I felt my whole word crash beneath me, my body felt numb and I couldn't feel anything at all. I wanted to cry, but I can't, my body's drained, I had no energy left, but he continued to explain, "B-but you were the first one that I approached on my own,"

"What's the difference?! In the end, everyone's the same with you as long as you get to fuck them! Like what you did with me!" he yelled, arms flailing around out of anger, turning around as hot tears started to crawl in my cheeks.

"But, Jack w-" he said, standing up to grab my forearms, I flinched away

"No! Don't touch me! You know what?! Don't talk to me ever again!" I said, running out the door, leaving him sobbing and crying to himself.

-

I found myself at a local park, sitting by the swing. The rain stopped just as it began, like my relationship with Alex. Would it even be considered as relationship? All we did was fuck around like rabbits anyway, no one made it official.

I thought of him a lot, much like right now, I never thought he'd play with me like that. I never knew how much it would hurt to be played at; I thought what we had was something special. I was feeling something deep with him, nothing I've felt before.

I'm such a child, what the hell am I doing? I know I shouldn't have said that, but.. I thought. As I looked up, I saw a stuffed rabbit toy in the middle of the play ground, along with faint footsteps coming over towards me. Of course, who else would it be?

"Alex.." I trailed off, lack of better things to say.

He picked up the stuffed toy, it was soaking wet from the rain. "I bet a child left this here, it'll be a good thing if they came back for it here tomorrow.. don't you think?" he said, smiling at me.

I scoffed at him, still feeling pissed off about what happened. There was an uncomfortable silence between us; he walked towards the swing sitting down.

"It might be a little too late for me to say this, but the only person I'm going out with right now is you, Jack." he said, it was almost a whisper. "You might not want to hear this but.." he breathed, "of all the people I've had relationships with, they all approached me thinking I was a woman."

I turned my head and looked at him, tears were streaming down his face, but he continued, "Then, everyone goes, 'Ooh, you're a guy?!' when they finds out that I am one. It's kinda cruel, don't you think?" his voice was breaking; he wiped the tears trailing down his cheeks.

"I purposely act gallant towards those people. It's my way of sulking. They immediately leave once we ended up having sex, even when they're all straight..." he choked, tears streaming violently from his eyes, he sighed, breath shaking, "It's things like that that makes me a slut, I guess.." he looked up to the sky, his eyes were shiny with tears as he clutches to the stuffed rabbit he was holding.

"I just wanted to find happiness." he sighed, looking at me with a weak smile, "In your case, I fell in love with your works first.." he laughed, "When I first saw you, I felt so lost wasn't sure exactly what to do. But I gathered all my courage and approached you."

I widened my eyes in surprise, "That wasn't what it looked to me?!" I exclaimed, my jaw dropping in an unbelievable manner.

"But... but how was I supposed to act... at a time like that?" he whispered, bringing his hand on his lips, looking like hr was more asking the question himself rather than me.

But I had to think about everything he said, we were both lacking something in our lives, it was affection. I truly liked Alex, I really did. I don't think I could spend a day away from that bastard, so I collected myself and stood up, attacking him in a hug, making him gasp and almost fall out of the swing.

"It's okay now! However it is.. I don’t care!" I whispered on his neck.

"Jack?" he said,

"It feels so good, I want to keep holding you forever." I said, tightening my arms around him and connecting my lips to his', bringing him to a passionate kiss.

-

"Oh, Jack!" Alex moaned, beneath me, I thrust in a few more times before I was coming inside him harder than before. We've been doing this for hours and we couldn't bring ourselves to stop. We couldn't bring ourselves to be apart from each other, not again. Never again.

He followed suit after me, releasing all over his stomach, moaning loudly along with my name rolling off of his tongue.

I collapsed on top of him, feeling his warm skin on mine. I nuzzled my nose on the crook of his neck; I would never get tired of Alex Gaskarth's scent. It was my personal cocaine, and I could never simply get enough of it.

Our breathings steadied and soon enough, we were both sent off drifting to sleep, clutching to each others like our life depended on it.

-

I woke up, it was dark, I was certain that it was still in the middle of the night, I slowly stood up and walked towards the kitchen, peeking through the door, and I saw Alex writing down his novel. He tilted his head back and gently rubbed his shoulders.

I always wondered when Alex got down to work. Has he always been pushing himself so hard when I wasn't aware? We only meet whenever it's convenient for me, after all. I guess that means that I actually mean something to him? God, I'm so embarrassed with what I did yesterday, you're so stupid, Jack! I hid behind the door, and silently hit myself on the head because of my stupidity.

"Jack, are you up? Do you want some coffee? I'll go get so--"

"No! No, don't. I'll do it. Just stay where you are, Alex, okay?" I said, running towards him and putting my hands on his shoulders, forcing him to sit down.

"Huh? Why? What's up? Is something wrong?" he asked, eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

"Oh, nothing! Really, nothing. I'll just.. I'll go get it today, you just stay there and do your work, okay Alex?" I said, fixing up the coffee maker and the mugs. He hummed in response.

I turned to look at him, to admire him and his brown eyes, his blonde hair, his soft skin grazing to mine. I smiled at him warmly, leaning down to kiss him gently.

I love you. I really, really love you.

Notes

Ugggh I know I'm sorry, another boring one shot. I know. I'm sorry. Ugh. I know I didn't upload a chapter, I know I'm sorry. But, hey, this one's actually long y'know..

Anyway, follow me on TUMBLR!!!!!!! don't be scared to message me, I won't bite, unless you ask me to. ;)

And also, feedback would be totally rad :))

I love you all!