This World's An Ugly Place

I hopped from foot to foot as I recited all the lyrics from the songs through my head. I took a few deep breaths and began rolling my shoulders, attempting to get rid of the jitters that were coursing through my body...which was more that I could say that I did than Case whom was worryingly pacing the room.

"Relax, Case," Sebastian said with a light chuckle as he walked into the side room and closing the door behind him. We had about an hour until we went up on stage, but that didn't stop the butterflies from coursing through all of us. Case just had a harder time of hiding and concealing the feeling since he usually tended to have stage fright.

"You don't think I'm trying?" he asked, not slowing his walk.

"Deep breaths," Sebastian cooed as he walked over to me and plopped down next to me.

Case seemingly ignored my brothers advice and continued to pace back and forth. He seemed to be doing the same as me - reciting the lyrics - but he just couldn't easily control the anxieties as the rest of us could.

"I can't believe we still don't have a bass player," I complained, deciding to change the subject.
Sebastian shrugged his shoulders. "We'll be fine with or without one."

"You know we're never going to get signed if we don't have a rhythm and lead guitarist," I lectured him, reciting words that one of the record labels had told us when we went to audition for them.

"Well, Blink only had three members in their band. We'll be fine," he said dismissively. That's how my brother was, he was always 'go with the flow' and constantly had his head up in the clouds. He never worried about anything, but maybe me.

"I can't believe we're playing tonight!" Jack nearly shouted as he walked into the room, pumping his fists into the air.

"Well, believe it, because we're on in five minutes," Rian said, walking in right behind him. Alex and Zack were probably off still setting up the stage since they were probably the two most mature ones of the group. At first glance, you would think Zack and Rian would be the most mature, but that was not the case when it came to serious tasks. Generally, it was Jack and Rian who wandered off getting bored from the serious events.

"How can you guys just sit around with all these butterflies just going berserk in your stomach?" Jack asked, walking - no, more like hopping - over towards Sebastian and I. I couldn't help but smile stupidly at how happy my cousin was getting.

"Well, for one, we have to wait longer than you," Sebastian replied. "And, not all of us are calm." He pointed towards Case who was still pacing around the back of the room. He was still reciting the lyrics in quiet whispers and not giving Jack or Rian another glance he was so focused.

"But I've been getting all hyped up since I woke up this morning," Rian put in towards the time remark.

"Nervous?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. As much as I was concealing my excitement and nerves, I was definitely growing more and more on edge as the time passed. But that also could be because Case's vibe was finally beginning to gnaw at me.

Rian nodded his head. "Yeah, just a little bit."

Jack scoffed now, straightening his back so he could stand taller. "I'm not, we're going to kill it."

"Oh, watch out, guys. We have a big, mighty man over here," Sebastian teased.

"Thanks for the help, guys," Zack said with a scowl as him and Alex soon joined us in the back room. Zack seemed to be harboring the anger for both him and Alex because Alex seemed to be unaffected by them ditching. Maybe he just figured they would in the first place?

"Hey, we helped," Jack pouted.

"Hardly," Zack pointed out, but he was already beginning to get over it. As little as I knew Zack, I did know that he wasn't one to be able to hold grudges. Actually, his bad memory probably made up for the fact that he could be a hot head at times.

"I would normally say next time you guys get the stage setting up duties, but I don't think I trust you with setting up," Alex admitted with a smirk. I couldn't help but let a small giggle slip from my lips because the statement was very true; I wouldn't let Jack within two feet of my own Fender.

I slipped my hand up onto Alex's leg and squeezed it gently. As much as he was trying to mask everything with a calm appearance, I knew he was freaking out inside. I just wanted him to know it was going to be fine, but the only way for him to truly know that is when he goes out onto the stage himself and feels the rush calm his nerves.

"All Time Low," the speaker crackled and the boys let out a collective breath. I felt my butterflies in my stomach begin to dance even more from excitement and I reached forward, trying to ignore the embarrassment and kissed Alex.

"Good luck," I said quietly and he seemed taken aback by my sudden affection and blushed.

"T-Thanks," he stammered. "You too." He winked now and chased after the rest of the boys who were already out the door. He more of skipped after them than ran...

"Wow," Sebastian said, leaning back in his chair. He looked straight ahead and I looked over at Case who quickly averted his eyes from me when I looked at him.

"What?" I grumbled.

"You put that kid on cloud nine," he pointed out and I simply shrugged my shoulders, now fighting my own growing blush.

I hopped up off my seat and walked off towards the door, looking back at my two band members with a bright smile. "Who's ready to watch our opener?"

***

"The future is bulletproof!" Jack chanted as he hopped up onto the Barakat's coffee table. The crowd was insane; especially compared to the first concert we did, but I had to admit...All Time Low really got them all worked up.

"We were all born to be legends!" Alex added, jumping up next to Jack. After the show ended, we wasted no time on getting back home. The entire ride home, which was about only five minutes, everyone was reeling about how pumped they were from the show. Even Zack was being louder, which was a first for me since I didn't know him that well.

"Get off my table," Lexus scolded, and both Alex and Jack hopped off, unfazed by her tone.

"Calm down, you bloody squirrels," Sebastian cursed, his body slightly swaying to the right until Lexus jogged over to him and supported him. Nearly right after we got off stage, both him andCase began taking shots on our success.

"You need to learn how to handle your liquor," Lexus scolded sisterly, making sure Sebastian was now well supported.

"Ah, I'm fine," Sebastian slurred.

"This guy gets wasted so fast," Case nearly giggled.

Lexus shot him a pointed expression. "And you're no better."

While the 'adults' in the room were being distracted, Zack stood up and motioned the boys to follow him down the stairs. Since I was the closest to my own band mates, I had to wait a moment longer before I could slip away going unnoticed.

Once finally in the basement, I joined the group of boys who were all gathering around Rian's backpack. I shouldered myself between Alex and Zack, which both didn't seem to mind as Alex slipped his arm around my waist.

"Now this is where the real party gets started," Rian said with a huge smile and Jack jumped anxiously from foot to foot. He pulled out a large bottle of Jack Daniel's and I unexpectedly gasped.

"Sweet!" Jack nearly yelled.

"How did you manage to swipe this?" I asked, nearly breathless as I looked up towards the drummer boy.

He shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly. "I have my ways."

"Yeah, his ways are by stealing it from his dad's stash and hoping he doesn't find out," Zack explained.

"Whatever the case, I'll take it," Jack said, anxiously waiting for Rian to unscrew the top.

Through all the commotion, I realized Alex had gone weirdly tense and quiet. I shifted my gaze and looked up at the tall boy that was holding me close, and his face was nearly pale. I blinked, confused by his sudden change in demeanor, but squeezed his hand nevertheless. "What's wrong?"

He shook his head silently, a desperate attempt to show that he was 'okay' but he knew me well enough to know that just that little motion wouldn't satisfy me. "It's just..."

I looked over at the rest of his band members and spoke out, "we'll be right back, don't start the drinking without us."

"Aw, what?!" Jack asked, throwing his arms down. He was never really patient when it came to alcohol.

"Wait," I said sternly, grabbing Alex's hand and leading him across the basement and towards the other side. Thankfully, Jack's house was big enough that on the other side Alex and I could talk without them overhearing us. "Okay, so what's the deal?" I asked, turning around to face him.

He looked down at his hands, biting down on his lip; he looked almost too shy to speak...or, rather, embarrassed? Whatever it was, he wasn't being very open about the subject.

"Come on, what's wrong?" I asked, taking a step closer and letting my hands slip into his. I looked up at him willingly until his eyes met mine and I felt a small shiver course through my body. I hadn't seen him like this since he first arrived at the Home.

Again, he shook his head but he managed to actually speak this time. "I-I don't think I'm comfortable with this...drinking. Underage."

I blinked, a bit shocked by his statement. I always thought it was just a myth that some kids actually chose not to drink on their own will, but then again I was always one for breaking rules.
"Oh," I said dumbly. To be honest, I wasn't exactly sure what to say. "Would this be your first time?"

He forced a small smile and shrugged his shoulders. That would be a yes.

"Is there...any specific reason as to why it bothers you?" I asked now, leaning back to look up at him. Before I began prepping him for drinking, I wanted to make sure it wasn't somehow tied to his messed up past.

"N-Not really. I mean, my uncle used to always drink beer and he never let me have any. I guess I just...never thought about it, really. It's just-" he sighed, not finding the right words.

"Scared of getting caught?" I asked honestly curious, although it came off more as a taunt.

"No," he said almost too quickly.

It was my turn to smile up at him now. "Oh, if that's all, don't even sweat it! The first time can be kind of scary, I mean, because it's something new. But you don't have to worry about a thing! We're all friends here and we got each other's backs. Plus, once you feel the kick, you won't regret it."

He stayed biting his lip and he looked away.

"If you really don't want to, then of course you don't have to. We're not going to force you into something you don't want to do. I'll even sit out of it with you," I spoke reassuringly. Even though it was hard to come across opportunities to drink - especially underage - I was willing to give this up if it meant keeping Alex happy. I would never want him being uncomfortable.

He nodded his head slowly, looking back down towards me. His dark eyes were alit with some sort of deep emotion, but I honestly couldn't pinpoint what he was feeling. He gently reached up, cupping my chin and pulled me close, beginning to kiss me.

"Yo, love birds! Either get a room or let's go!" Jack shouted from across the basement, rudely interrupting our moment.

Alex smiled into the kiss, pulling away and I giggled at his blushing expression. This time, he took my hand and pulled me back towards the group. Rian was the first to take a swing and after that was Jack and then Zack. They passed the bottle to Alex and he held it momentarily in his hand before he quickly tipped the bottle against his lips. He nearly sputtered after his huge gulp and I couldn't help but chuckle at that.

"Easy there, tiger," I spoke, taking the bottle away from him. He blinked his eyes a couple of times, and thankfully, the boys didn't mock him for not knowing how to consume whiskey. "All right, guys, let's see who gets the worst hang over tomorrow."

Notes

Ohhhh long wait! Sorry, loves<3