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Homicidal

“Why are you crying baby?”

I found myself knocking at Zack’s door.

I felt scared, hurt, but mostly scared. Scared because of Jack, hurt because of Taylor. My life had been always so fucked, it was hard to tell myself it had been perfect one day, because now, it felt like it was that bad again, that fucked again, it’s just that now it was even worse.

The girl I always wanted to have, the girl I loved the most for the past ten years, she just cheated on me, and she was fucking pregnant. I suddenly felt like shit, I felt not good enough.

And then there was Jack, the psycho killer who just wanted to fuck me. The craziest about that is, I wanted him to fuck me. I felt scared of myself, I felt sick. Tay had cheated on me, at the same time I was willing to be fucked by another person, a guy, a guy who killed people. But I also wanted more, I wanted to change him, he was creepy, sick, but I could see there was something good on his smile, like he was hiding someone, hiding a personality that could even be loved.

Maybe I wanted to make him a better person. Maybe I wanted him to love me.

“What the fuck man.” Zack had openned the door, he was now rubbing his eyes, luckily he wouldn’t see me so easily, I noticed I was crying.

“Can I come in?” I said, after I wiped the tears, staring at my feet full of snow.

“Yeah… sure.” He said, openning the door.

“Sorry for the inconvenience.” I replied, sitting on the red couch of his messy living room’s apartment.

“Yeah yeah.” He said, sitting on the couch in front of me. “Wanna tell me what’s going on now?” He said, finally staring at me.

“I… I have something to tell you.” My head was such a mess, there was so many things stuck in my throat. He just nodded, for me to keep talking. “Something weird is going on man, I’m not even sure if I should be telling you this, but you’re my best friend, my only friend, so yeah…” I started, I had to tell him. “The thing is…” I hesitated. “… Taylor is pregnant.” I finally said, I had failed, I was scared of telling him about Jack, I got scared of losing him.

“Did you come at my house in the fucking middle of the night to tell me you casually fucked your wife and she got pregnant? Tell me something new.” He laughed, I guess he was drunk, something happened.

“No… I mean.” That was making me nervous, what the hell was I doing at his house anyway. “Kid’s not mine. Another guy fucked her, at a party, she told me she was drunk, and they drugged her, and I was also drunk…”

“Don’t tell me you believed in that.” He said, raising an eyebrow at me, holding back a laugh.

“I think she cheated on me.” I finally said.

“Oh you think so? Dude, if I didn’t know you I would say you’re the most naïve and innocent person I’ve even met.” He laughed. “Man, I’m sorry if this is gonna hurt your feelings but I always knew she was a bitch, I always told you that, everybody tells you that. She doesn’t love you man, maybe you do, but she doesn’t, she’s just having fun with you.” He said, getting up and pulling his own hair, he wasn’t fine at all. “I’m tired of women you know? They’re all the same. They make you suffer, they make you fuck them, and finally, when you actually feel something for them, they fuck you, and they fuck you hard, they fucking rip you in half. Do you think it’s over? I’ll tell you what, it’s not over yet… after they fuck you and suck the blood you have left, they take everything, including your heart.” He started to sob, I would even find it funny, but Zack looked miserable.

“What happened Zack?” I asked, staring at him.

“What happened? I’ll tell you what happened. Remember when I said I was scared of finding my girlfriend’s head hanging on my front door? I’m not scared anymore, actually, I could do that now.” He said, then stumbled towards the kitchen.

“Zack, what are you doing…” I said, going after him, he was grabbing a knife. “Man you should get some sleep, you’re nervous and you’ll end up doing something stupid.” I said, quickly taking the knife from his hand.

“She cheated on me Alex, Linda fucking openned her legs to another guy.” He cried, now collapsing on my shoulder.

“I have to go home now, promise me you won’t do anything.” I made him look at me, I really was worried, but I had to go home.

He didn’t say anything, he fell asleep, he freaking fell asleep on top of me, almost causing us both to fall on the kitchen floor. I tried to carry him towards his bedroom but he was just too heavy, so I made him sit on the kitchen chair and rested his head above the table.

I left the house, closed the door and slowly walked along the snowy streets. The wind wasn't blowing much, but it was really cold.

I openned my apartment’s door and tiptoed towards the bathroom for a hot shower. Everybody was sleeping already.

What a messy day.

The day that followed was a common day.

I woke up and nobody was home. Tay had taken the kids to school and then left to work. She was a photographer and was great at her job, I used to say I was proud of her, Tay always dreamed of being a photographer, she always liked to work with people, to be surrounded by people, I wonder that’s why she is such a whore. It hurts so much for me to think that.

I had absolutely nothing to do at the station. Zack stayed home for the day, I called him, he said he had a terrible headache and would stay home. The station wasn’t aware of any new information about the Head Collector, also know by me as Jack, so I could return home sooner today.

I drove home and got to my apartment, only when I was ready to knock at the door, I heard someone speaking, but I couldn’t hear what was he talking about.

It was Tay, but she wasn’t talking to any of the kids, they were supposed to be home, but she wasn’t talking to them, she was talking to a man. Maybe the father of her baby decided to make a visit, maybe he came to say I’m sorry and expected us to end up fighting in the middle of the living room.

I just got my keys and slowly openned the door, trying to sneak into the bedroom without being seen. Unfortunately, Taylor was now at the kitchen, and spotted me.

“Hey.” She said, staring at the ground. “There’s someone waiting for you, at the living room.” She said, getting two glasses of water.

“I wasn’t expecting anyone, who is it?” I asked, I really wasn’t expecting anyone.

“He told me he works with you, his name’s… Austin I think. Do you know him?” She asked, finally staring at me.

“Not that I remember. What does he look like?” I asked, this was getting weird, maybe he was a co worker I had never seen before, or someone new at my station.

“He’s tall, skinny, dark eyed, dark haired, he’s pretty nice though.” She said, blushing and smiling at herself, getting the glasses and walking towards the living room. I only knew one person who would fit that description, what the hell was he doing at my house?

We entered the living room, and as I suspected, Jack was sitting on the couch, he wore a naughty smile. Tay handed him one of the glasses of water and sat on the couch in front of him, crossing her legs.

“Uh… Tay? Do you mind leaving us to talk alone?” I said, staring at her with a “please” look.

“Oh of course, sorry baby.” She said, getting up and kissing me softly.

I watched her dissapear into the corridor before saying anything.

“What. The. Fuck. Are you doing at my house.” I said, it didn’t even sound like a question.

“I’m glad you’re home, your wife was almost begging me to fuck her.” He said, a nasty tone when he pronounced the word “wife”, I didn’t say anything, just raised my eyebrow. “Yeah, I don’t know what’s the matter with her, I’m not even good looking.” He laughed. Oh you are.

“Ok… will you tell me what’s going on?” I whispered.

“I missed your pretty face.” He pouted.

“You can’t just break into my house.” I said.

“I didn’t break into your house, your wife openned the door, and don’t worry, I’m not gonna hurt your pretty family.” He said, bending his head back and taking a deep breath. “Come here.” He said, staring at me.

“What do you want.” I said, I couldn’t stare at him.

“I want you to come here.” He said, smiling.

“And I want you to leave.” I said, getting up and walking towards the door, he had to leave, he was making me nervous.

“And I want you to. Come. Here. Don’t make me repeat that again, you wouldn’t like to see me angry.” He said, getting up too, I turned around, he was still smiling, with his arms openned, I walked towards him.

“What is it.” I pouted, while he pulled me in a hug and kissed my hair softly.

“I said I missed you Alex, do you think I’m a cold monster?” He whispered, drawing circles on my back with his fingers.

“Yes.” I said, and then I noticed I was crying, I didn’t know why though, but I needed to stop, Tay could open the door at any second.

“I’m not.” He whispered, kissing my neck. “Why are you crying baby?” He said, making me look at him, for the first time ever, he looked worried.

“I don’t know.” I sobbed, hugging him, I wasn’t feeling nervous anymore, it was even comfortable.

He stroked my cheek softly, wiping some tears, then leaned in for a kiss. He didn’t rape my mouth this time, it was a soft kiss, I hugged him tighter, earning a smile from him. I could stay like that forever, for some moments, I even believed he could love me.

“What are you doing daddy?”

It was Mika.

Notes

Sorry for taking so long to write this shitty chapter, I'm having some problems at home.

Your comments made me so fucking happy, like seriously. It's so good to see that some of my favorite writers read my stories (: thank you so much <3

Comments

omg you need to update, like, now!! i need to know what's gonna happen!!! i can't handle all this suspense! JESUS CHRIST, PLEASE UPDATE!!!! ;~;

LizzyOnSkittles LizzyOnSkittles
3/23/14

Please update! I cannot handle all the suspense.

TheBarakitten TheBarakitten
2/5/14

OH MY FUCKING GOD YOU CAN'T LEAVE IT THERE OH MY SWEET JESUS PLEASSSSSSE UPDATE??!!!?!?!!?!!!!!!

UPDATE! Ahhhhh!
TheBarakitten TheBarakitten
10/16/13
;~; I NEED AN UPDATE.
queerbarakat queerbarakat
3/30/13